*Discussion Of The Week #5 Cousin Marriages In Pakistani Dramas* - Page 6

Originally posted by: awida

In fact my late aunt was childless, but she enjoyed her life, as she had less responsibilities. Sadly her husband had a second marriage and had children. He lived in another country with his new family.. but she was a strong woman..never once I found her mouring or crying over her bad luck. She used to consider us , and our children as her own. 😃 I make duas for her till now. May Allah grant her jannat.

I hate when men do second marriage just because the first wife cant give him kids. Such men dont deserve a single tear😡

Originally posted by: Unique.Sheep

I am hearing that for the first time. All cousin marriages in my family had healthy babies.

I heard adoption is not permitted in Islam

https://www.mughalbarristers.com/adoption-in-islam-and-law/

Originally posted by: awida

@maroon . It is only nowadays, because of the huge change in society . This practice (cousin marriage ) happened since more than a thousand years. Ppl should've realized it since ages that cousin marriages can affect the relationships between families. But no. Ppl then were wiser than us. They learned how to deal with such problems without letting them affect their relatives. But now .. ppl are growing intolerance. I am scared of thinking of future.😒

@Blue . I still find it strange how can a village guys become your brothers. I am surprised that in the whole village no one falls in love with another!😲

And it think it is cultural, we believe a lot in dharm ka rishta .Ritual and spiritual platonic relationships are common and very valued in our society. People tie Rakhi on unrelated people' s kalai too...it is just a very beautiful aspect of our culture.

Originally posted by: Unique.Sheep

Cousin marriages should only be acceptable when the guy and girl are interested in each other. No other reason.

Originally posted by: Ashley.Tisdale

Its not forbidden after a couple of generation but its not adviced either. Its something most of us chose not to do. Like I said we have cultural and religious significance when it comes to siblings and cousins bonds.

I have seen a lot of Pakistani shows focussing on cousins who fall in love and getting married but I watch it with an open mind. Although it would be nice to see other relationships as well, not just cousin marriage.

Agreed. I dont take much offense in cousin marriage as I do in addressing the cousin as "bhai" and later marrying the same person it's weird to watch. Bro sis relation is scared to us like our parents . Dont address them as bhai n that will make it much less awkward.

Originally posted by: ItsmeSehar

AMEEN SUMMA AMEEN ❤️indeed we belong to ALLAH ,and indeed to him we will return.Your aunt was a great woman. It is not easy for a woman to live in a society without a husband and children.When will you create a new thread? We need a new DOTW thread for further discussion😃

In our society there are many women who live alone. Many men go to Arabian Gulf countries for work.. leaving their families and wives . So they learn how to depend on their own selves.

InshaAllah will make a new thread when the discussion here ends. 😳

Originally posted by: Unique.Sheep

I hate when men do second marriage just because the first wife cant give him kids. Such men dont deserve a single tear😡

My aunt had many miscarrages .. her husband got married only after 15 yrs or more of their marriage. He was the only waris of his late father. And he felt responsible to not let the name of his family erased. My aunt and my grand mother (who was his aunt) encouraged him to have a second marriage. But after he did so , problems happened and then seperation.😒

Originally posted by: sami011

it is north indian tradition only not in west or any other region. I only know what Punjabi or haryana people would do..for us village guys are brothers ,no exception. In a big village that is almost a town it could happen, but in cities you can marry your neighbor if you want, only difference is ancestral village has to be different.

And it think it is cultural, we believe a lot in dharm ka rishta .Ritual and spiritual platonic relationships are common and very valued in our society. People tie Rakhi on unrelated people' s kalai too...it is just a very beautiful aspect of our culture.

Yes I enjoy watching rakhi scenes in Indian dramas. 😃 I like it when girls feel safe in the village coz they know guys will treat them as sisters. But my romantic heart still craves for village romance.😳

It is always good to know about different cultures. 😊 this helps in understanding and accepting the differences between ppl. Coming from a country which has one religion and one culture I couldn't understand how can ppl who live in countries with different cultures deal with the differences between them.🤓 Now I knew that with good understanding nothing is impossible.

Originally posted by: awida

My aunt had many miscarrages .. her husband got married only after 15 yrs or more of their marriage. He was the only waris of his late father. And he felt responsible to not let the name of his family erased. My aunt and my grand mother (who was his aunt) encouraged him to have a second marriage. But after he did so , problems happened and then seperation.😒

I understand that but its so unfair for women that the man can go and make a new family whenever he is unhappy while the woman is left to lead a lonely life

Originally posted by: _charu_

Agreed. I dont take much offense in cousin marriage as I do in addressing the cousin as "bhai" and later marrying the same person it's weird to watch. Bro sis relation is scared to us like our parents . Dont address them as bhai n that will make it much less awkward.

@bold: exactly that surprised me the most. Actually the first show I saw was Merey Paas Tum Ho...following that I saw Thora Sa Haq and Ghalati as it had actors from MPTH. So I was really confused when I saw that in TSH Zamin got married to one cousin while engaged to another, and in Ghalati the leads were also engaged since they were related. Since we don't see cousin marriages much, I had no idea it was common practice. Took me a while to understand the dynamics, specially when I watched Jab We Wed and Deewangi.

Agree with the bro sis relationship statement. Its very pious for us, in fact older siblings/cousins sometimes become a parental figure in our lives. I turn into a mom for many of my younger ones 😆 Plus we don't really experience this or hear of it much.

But yeah if they don't use the words bhai or aapi while addressing a person, it is still fine.