raanjhana; vani ff (chapter 9, october 29th) - Page 2

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Cinnamon_Kisses thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago
#11

Originally posted by: nainaasharmaa


đŸ„șđŸ„șđŸ„° thank youuuu, i’ll get chapter 3 up soon! hopefully tomorrow, i cant wait till sat for the show so fulfilling all my wishes for myself đŸ˜‚đŸ€§

I am waiting... Even I have started thinking of an OS where Gharwaali is jealous of bahaar waali

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Posted: 4 years ago
#12

Originally posted by: Cinnamon_Kisses

I am waiting... Even I have started thinking of an OS where Gharwaali is jealous of bahaar waali


i’m waiting tooo haha this gharwaali bahaar wali cracked me up for some reason i need more of this on the show but mayuri tou ponky se kaam nipta diya đŸ€ŠđŸœâ€â™€ïž

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Posted: 4 years ago
#13

FF is so good. I can see vani while reading . Waiting for next chapter

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Posted: 4 years ago
#14

Originally posted by: Sowmya_SMfan

FF is so good. I can see vani while reading . Waiting for next chapter


thank you so much đŸ„° i’m glad you can imagine them. hopefully should get chapter 3 out tonight?

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Posted: 4 years ago
#15

Originally posted by: nainaasharmaa


i’m waiting tooo haha this gharwaali bahaar wali cracked me up for some reason i need more of this on the show but mayuri tou ponky se kaam nipta diya đŸ€ŠđŸœâ€â™€ïž

Show pe nahi hua toh kya... Hum likhenge naa

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Posted: 4 years ago
#16

Originally posted by: Cinnamon_Kisses

Show pe nahi hua toh kya... Hum likhenge naa


haan yaar wohi tou. nothing's happening there so hum hi khud likhte hai and we'll only fulfill our dreams 😛

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Posted: 4 years ago
#17

Lovely os, really enjoyed it

Thanks for writing jealousy part

Do write moređŸ€—

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Posted: 4 years ago
#18

Originally posted by: Minig

Lovely os, really enjoyed it

Thanks for writing jealousy part

Do write moređŸ€—


thank youuu so glad you enjoyed it.


updating chapter 3 now! x

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Posted: 4 years ago
#19

raanjhana; naagin 5 (chapter 3)


veer couldn’t figure it out. if bani saved him, and he knew she really did leave for fresh air, then who poisoned him? the only new person was mayuri and so he started suspecting her.

he went to her room to confront her, “mayuri darling, whats wrong? you didnt even check up on me.”

“veer baby, i was so worried. its good your wife was able to save you. i really thought she was gonna prove to be useless but —“

“don’t. don’t say anything against bani mayuri.”

“veer what’s wrong with you? you havent really fallen for her have you?” mayuri asked shocked.

“bani is my wife. what’s between us is between us. i don’t need to explain myself to you”

“relax baby, i was just asking”

“mayuri, where were you when i got bit?”

“are you suspecting me of something veer?”

“you seem awfully suspicious. you were tensed when i came in and i can see you’re hiding something now as well. what is it?” veer asked.

“veer, i’m getting engaged to ponky.”

“what?”

“ponky proposed and i said yes. i want to marry ponky and that’s what i was afraid to tell you. i’m not hiding anything else.”

bani was passing by when she heard mayuri say this. she was relieved that mayuri wouldnt be all over her husband now but also annoyed that she’d have to live with her.

“congratulations, i’m very happy for you & ponky! should we throw the engagement party tomorrow?” bani said entering the room.

“yes of course, i’m glad you’re happy. after all we’re going to be related now.” mayuri said.

“so you’re really getting married to ponky?” veer who was still surprised, asked.

“yes she is jaan, do you have a problem?” bani interjected.

“no sweetheart, call me jaan one more time though. that made my day.”

“okay guys please get a room” mayuri said.

bani and veer left to arrange the engagement party that was to happen the next day. the family found out and was extremely surprised but happy for the couple. it was rather shocking since mayuri and veer were the one with a fling.

mayuri decided to go ahead with this engagement because veer started suspecting her and so on the spot she decided to rope ponky into this ordeal.

the engagement starts and because bani was preparing everything, she got ready and came down last. veer was chatting away with friends & cousins. bani stood awkwardly on the side, not knowing anyone. her relationship with veer wasnt such that she could go to him either, it would simply be odd. after a few minutes however, someone came to her and started talking to her.

“how are you?”

“i’m sorry- do i know you?”

“bani, you forgot your nag?”

“jay?”

“i had to take a different disguise to come here because i didnt know how to reach you. are you okay?”

“oh thank god you’re here. i don’t know what’s happening. everything’s moving so quick.”

“what do you mean? has veer done something? bani this isnt a real marriage”

“jay i know, and no he didnt do anything. i mean the other day with the poison and me saving him. on top of that this engagement. god i cant stand this mayuri”

“why? because she’s close to veer? are you getting jealous?”

“jay you know i love you. why would i be jealous? no it’s not that i just cant stand her”

“okay okay my angry naagin, calm down.”

they both started laughing and cracking jokes. they caught veer’s eye and he was staring at them having a conversation. once they started laughing, he couldn’t control himself and joined in the conversation.

“bani sweetheart, you didnt introduce me to your friend.”

“um this is veer, my husband” bani told jay who was still in a disguise.

“nice to meet you. you have a lovely wife!” jay said.

“i know. mrs singhania, i need to talk to you.”

“veer i’m talking, i’ll come later.”

“now,” veer said and took bani across the room. tapish was standing nearby and could hear the entire conversation that played out.

“what veer? whats your problem?”

“sweetheart. you are my problem.”

“i’m sorry?”

“you should be. i want him gone.”

“who?” bani asked

“him. i want that guy you were talking to gone.”

“why?”

“because i do. i don’t like you talking to him.”

“veer you cant tell me who to talk to and who not to talk to. its none of your business”

“oh so yesterday when you wanted mayuri gone, that was fine? but when i want him gone that’s not my business?”

“mayuri is a different situation. i don’t like her. this isnt the same thing. i was just talking to him and no its not your business.”

“bani it is my business. this is my house, you are my wife. this is very much my business. i don’t want him here and i don’t want my wife flirting with him.”

“veer stop making a scene. i wasnt flirting with him. i was talking to him”

“i don’t care. i don’t want you doing anything with him. you are mine, only mine.”

“i'm not yours.”

“i’m kicking him out.”

“veer stop—“

before bani could protest, veer had gone to confront jay and tapish came in the picture.

“bani, i’m sorry to interrupt but can i have a word?”

“yes bhaiya, of course. what’s wrong?”

“i know that veer can be hard to adjust with. he’s a little stubborn & annoying at times,”

“no bhaiya, very stubborn and annoying all the time.”

“you’re right i wont argue with you on that” tapish said laughing, “but bani, he loves you. he has never cared for anyone as much as he does for you. he warns all of us on the daily that nothing should happen to you when he leaves the house. he orders the staff to take care of your comfort. mayuri was talking about you earlier before you came down, he stopped her to tell her that you’re his wife and she had no right to speak against you. veer may seem hard on the outside but i promise he’s soft on the inside. he wont show it to any of us but he tries to with you. i know this is a weird situation and your marriage wasnt the way you wanted it to be but please just give him a chance. you wont find someone to love you as much as he does. i can promise you that.” tapish gave bani his word of advice and left.

“you’re wrong bhaiya, jay loves me and way more than veer could. veer wants me but he doesn’t love me. jay loves me. i’m meant for jay not veer.”



do you guys prefer this style of writing and dialogue or the previous chapter? i thought chapter 2 would be easier to write but i didn’t love how it turned out so tried it this way and low key i find this more enjoyable to write so i hope you guys like how it’s written as well. next chapter is gonna be very very fun, lots of reveals and some naagin 1 scenes in the mix. also forgot to mention in chapter 2, i don't know veer’s dad’s name or any of their names tbh so oops?


chapter 4: https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/post/154442363

Edited by nainaasharmaa - 4 years ago
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Posted: 4 years ago
#20

Yayyyyyyy! Update

Ahaan Bani calls him jaan... Dil leke dard e Dil de gaye... Tum jaan jaan kehke meri jaan le gaye...

I really loved the bit when Veer said to Bani to not talk to Jay and acted all possesive. Me like that. That entire conversation felt like a moment of Vani's life. Veer will say dialogues like

"Sweet heart maine keh diya toh bass keh diya... Ab tum decide karlo isse tum baahar phekogi ya main"

"Haan kal toh bada keh rahi thi Mayuri ko nikaalo iss ghar se... Ab main keh raha hoon ke uss aadmi se baat mat karo toh tumhe problem ho rahi hai. This is not fair Jaan. Mere pyaar mein sab equal equal hota hai"

"Tumhe nazar bharke dekhne ka, tumhaare kareeb rehne ka... Tumhe chhoone ka haq sir mujhe hai Mrs. Veeranshu Singhania, tum meri patni ho"

Arreee yeh kya... Sweet heart ne toh Jay jaap shuru kar diya ïżŒ Bholenath madad kijiye

I loved the update and I will say I would to read this writing style than the previous one.

Edited by Cinnamon_Kisses - 4 years ago

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