Guide to Parenting by Shilpa Sharma MESSAGE pg37 - Page 2

@Jess

Your last paragraph was beautiful. Sorry, I keep re reading it. There is no other reply to it except, thank you for sharing it with me. 😳

You aptly pointed out that with a good parent the child always goes to them for advice. One of the problems of modern parenting is that the parent becomes more like a peer than elder. The other problem being that children tend to look for role models and advice in those who are young. No more do we seek wisdom from the older generations, we seek them from those you have never felt life let alone lived it!

The best thing about Mayu and Shilpa Aunty is that I began being more 'funny' more jokey with my own parents. I have always looked to be kinder towards them but never thought I could play around with them as I might a friend. I will quite cheerfully tell you, that the results were wonderful!😃 I would highly recommend you being a Mayu to your mum and dad!

@Butterfly,

I forgot to highlight your insightful point about Mayu and the gang. I too agree that one of Mayu's most endearing characteristics was his reservedness. For example during his courtship of Nupur, he shared himself openly with Samrat and even during Samrat's court case he gave himself completely in his friend's aid all without the type of 'gang' mentality which is being forced upon his character now and therefore does not fit him well. It is not even like those old clothes you grow out of and are delusionally trying to wear again, it is more like he borrowed it from another person entirely!

sabah!!!!! Thanks a lot for this thread...👍🏼..if mayank & nupur 's relation can hv a special thread..mayank & shilpa auty's unique mom-son relation.truly deserve to be appreciated also!!!!!!!!!!

IU know i can't write beautifully like u do........but let me just try what i felt when i watched that scene "the step -1" as u mentioned first time.......
1.28 minuted scene .& it says it all what a special bond is there between mayank & her mom.......our very own shilpa aunty .come with cup of cofee for herself & her son..okk.she is a caring mom....then suddenly she said."kabhi toh in kitabo ko aram fia kar.....".i was like arre! she is a different mom..who don't want her son to study too much,but it is justified as she is mom of "the" mayank sharma 😆.....then mayank as usual akdu manner ."itna chini"..quickly she exchange the cofee mug with him..well now thats what i call a scene i can connect with..... just doing this small thing they make the audience like me believe immediately that they r mom & son..atleast .i felt it coz my mom do that every time........no drama ...no bhari dialogue....its so simple .& i immediately fall in love with this mom...

He mentioned a "pagal ladhki".....& her mom is cool abt it.in fact defending that anjaan ladhki.."sab teri tarh ullo nehi hote"...ah! how well she khows her son....😆.......& then.....

"Toh tum abhi tak kyu jaagre ho?"

"Tujhe nahin pata?"

"Pata hai, per baar baar suney main accha lagta hai' 'tum jaagre ho isliye"

we saw a part of mayank which was never seen before....&that is like every other mama's boy , he also love the fact that his mom is staying awake for him.....cute na!!!!!!!😳

then comes that uniqueness in their relation that i always like.....that ulta pulta thing.mayank's sudden caring nature....arre! moms r suppose to be caring to their son 😳.but this son is different...if time come he can use the same stick that his mom use on him....he pushes her to go for sleep.coz otherwise she will be late for office tomorrow....& that 9.15 ki local.....say s that they r not a richie rich family..but they hv enough wealth of love to keep them happy!!!!!!!!

& at the end.balo ko mat chuo.........uff! mayank sharma can be this cute mama's boy kind of guy too!!!!! I can't halp but adore him for this....he was so cute na!!!!😳
& what a mom she is.....imitating her own son...then i realize she is mom & as well as the only "friend" of mayank sharma......
so she is a allrounder.... .a mom, a dad(as there was no father figure for mayank) & a true friend......she had to maintain three different roles & as u said the first step is to create a loving trusting bond.....Shipa aunty, by building up a relationship with her son with much love & care...she did it perfectly.
So, thats my take abt that scene.....1.28 minute scene but tell u a lot na! 😊
thanks again sabah,for this wonderful thread!!!!!

Sabah I know M and reservedness was a part or way of defining him, this set him apart and now he is just one of the crowd, not someone special as he was, still hoping that this part of him, actually he is brought back.

sabah!!!!! Thanks a lot for this thread...👍🏼..if mayank & nupur 's relation can hv a special thread..mayank & shilpa auty's unique mom-son relation.truly deserve to be appreciated also!!!!!!!!!! I just learned how to use the quote button, 😳 so I will experiment with you first, Mou. 😆

IU know i can't write beautifully like u do Beauty is in intention. Your words are imbued with honesty, passion and love. What else would anyone look for? It is always an honour to read your thoughts! 😃........but let me just try what i felt when i watched that scene "the step -1" as u mentioned first time.......
1.28 minuted scene .& it says it all what a special bond is there between mayank & her mom.......our very own shilpa aunty .come with cup of cofee for herself & her son..okk.she is a caring mom....then suddenly she said."kabhi toh in kitabo ko aram fia kar.....".i was like arre! she is a different mom..who don't want her son to study too much, I never thought of that! This is why I love feedback. I cannot grow or develop if I am continually lost within my own thoughts. I guess that is why Mayu always 'ran' to his mum for advise!
but it is justified as she is mom of "the" mayank sharma 😆.....then mayank as usual akdu manner ."itna chini"..quickly she exchange the cofee mug with him..well now thats what i call a scene i can connect with..... just doing this small thing they make the audience like me believe immediately that they r mom & son..atleast .i felt it coz my mom do that every time........no drama ...no bhari dialogue....its so simple .& i immediately fall in love with this mom...I defy anyone to watch this scene and not fall for Shilpa Aunty! For those who were already smitten by Mayank, we were privileged to witness Mayu!

He mentioned a "pagal ladhki".....& her mom is cool abt it.in fact defending that anjaan ladhki..I know, and not because she is a woman too but because she knows her 'sadu' Mayu!

"sab teri tarh ullo nehi hote"...ah! how well she khows her son....😆.......& then.....

"Toh tum abhi tak kyu jaagre ho?"

"Tujhe nahin pata?"

"Pata hai, per baar baar suney main accha lagta hai' 'tum jaagre ho isliye"

we saw a part of mayank which was never seen before....&that is like every other mama's boy Serioulsy, she gave mama's boy a whole new dignity. Even i regard them with a certain awe, now.

he also love the fact that his mom is staying awake for him.....cute na!!!!!!!😳 There is a Telugu film, I can't remember the name, in which the 'hero' tells the girl, that he loves her so much that from the morning he wakes up to the moment he sleeps all he thinks about is her, is she happy, is she cold, is she all right. He says I bet even your mother doesn't do that! So she asks her mum how many times in a day do you think of me? Her mum replies I have about a thousand things to do, who has time to think of you.

I didn't like this. Yes we have a thousand things to do, that is why our head is full of things other than our loved ones. However our heart is full of their thoughts and love. In those rare moments of calm in the day, those precious and blessed moments of peace, who do we give those valuable moments to in thought? For every parent, it is their child. Shilpa Aunty epitomizes this aspect of parent hood.

then comes that uniqueness in their relation that i always like.....that ulta pulta thing. As Ulta pulta as Mayu and EVEN Nupur (case in point, when she cries for gunjan at Lucky Mishra's house and then returns to normal out of the blue)
mayank's sudden caring nature....arre! moms r suppose to be caring to their son 😳.but this son is different...if time come he can use the same stick that his mom use on him....he pushes her to go for sleep.coz otherwise she will be late for office tomorrow....& that 9.15 ki local.....say s that they r not a richie rich family..but they hv enough wealth of love to keep them happy!!!!!!!!

& at the end.balo ko mat chuo.........uff! mayank sharma can be this cute mama's boy kind of guy too!!!!! I can't halp but adore him for this....he was so cute na!!!!😳 Isshstyle!!!! I have heard this in films before, but Mayank's style is very.... .....As is the manner in which Shilpa Aunty messes with his hair. Notice, it has that loving touch!

& what a mom she is.....imitating her own son...then i realize she is mom & as well as the only "friend" of mayank sharma......
so she is a allrounder.... .a mom, a dad(as there was no father figure for mayank) & a true friend......she had to maintain three different roles & as u said the first step is to create a loving trusting bond.....Shipa aunty, by building up a relationship with her son with much love & care...she did it perfectly. Perfectly and eloquently expressed! We are never invited to know the specifics of their history, but that is the beauty of Mayu and Shilpa Aunty we don't need to know. We can 'see' the bond that those troubles and woe have produced and therefore can see the shimmering, glistening, bright silver lining under the dark cloud of their past!
So, thats my take abt that scene.....1.28 minute (Yeah you are right, i don't know why i said minute!) 😆scene but tell u a lot na! 😊
thanks again sabah,for this wonderful thread!!!!!
Thanks you so very much for taking the time out to post. I very much appreciate your feedback, because you highlighted so many nuances of moments that I just missed!

luved ur post mann!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Another great thing about this mother is she handles her son's anger wihout hurting his ego... she knows his reactions are extreme sometimes...like his fight with Nupur over the project thing... or his fight when drugs misunderstanding.... she saw him terribly upset on Nupur... she saw that he is over reacting... he threw the project folder on the floor with anger.... she knows he is over reacting and angry... and she knows partly it is his fault also... but she doesn't point his mistakes rudely... she calms him down and politely tells him that there might be misunderstanding...

@Butterfly,

Thanks for reminding me about that scene. That is the way I want to remember Mayank. Reserved. Why because within those idiosyncrasies lies 'his' beauty.

Case in point. Do you remember when Nupur asks are you insult me or complimenting me? he says whatever you want? She replies' er...insult' He looks at her dumbfound!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EDE_5CHQwwQ&feature=related

It wouldn't work with any other person/character

Case in point number 2. The scene that started this thread. Why is this caring Mayu to his mum so endearing? So sweet? Because up until then we hadn't seen it, never entertained such thoughts that he could ever be a Mayu. That is why Shilpa Aunty quite readily accepts the jodi of Mayank and Nupur, knowing that Mayu would suit Nupur. Whereas when others, Gunjan, Dia etc find out they find it unbelievable because they never met 'Mayu'

@Jess

Where you say "Another great thing about this mother is she handles her son's anger without hurting his ego... " Exactly. When someone advises you whilst simultaneously trying to put you in your place, you can feel the malice. Whereas when it is sincere advise, you understand that its source is love. That is why as you mentioned here
"He raises his voice on his mother sometimes when he is angry... but immediately regrets... he respects her... and knows it's not right to shout at your mom... " He knew he stepped out of line. It is more than guilt from shouting at your mother, is it sadness from applying wrong intentions upon them, implying that Shilpa Aunty was demanding respect, blind obeyance whereas in truth he knew she loved him and wants the absolute best for him! There is no 'ego' on either side so she quickly forgives him always... they love and respect each other... "

I love his dialogue to Nupur... yeh sar ek hi insaan ke aage zuka hai... aur woh hai maa.... aur ab tum..." So many mothers I know want to raise their 'boys' to be good men, those who respect women. Then they mollycoddle them and they end up being nightmare husbands. Shilpa Aunty raised Mayank to see women as equals. He puts men and women on an equal platform. He doesn't relate Nupur's lack of interest in her studies to her gender but her character. When Sheena makes her 'hot' first entrance he isn't impressed because he never judges women as objects, they are his peers.

@Mayur_prida

Thank you so much for reading! 😃

Hey Sabah and Jess really well said.

@ Butterfly,

Nope you can never give up. Even if those you love let go of you. It would be ingratitude for all the love already given. You don't have to watch them fall from grace but you must never stop advising nor turn your back. It is too cruel!

As for the scene, my take on it (feel free to disagree)

When Nupur ask insult or compliment; the normal response, the one a person trying to dig himself out of a hole would be 'compliment' HOWEVER Mayank knows that Nupur is slightly hatke SO says playfully 'up to you' also reinforcing the whole 'I am at your command' sentiment he began by getting her ice cream to appease her; at this stage a normal person would say compliment and then sit back and let the barrage of compliments fill their heart HOWEVER Nupur knows that this is what Mayank is expecting of her (vain, attention seeking side) So says insult to completely bewilder him. He is predisposed to order and she is chaos in a salwar kameez!

HOWEVER they both know that Mayank loves this hatke, chaotic Nupur.

My take, so please if there are other opinions out there, feel free to share!😃