AbhiGya FF ~ Strangers - Chapter 10 (Last Chapter) Pg 22 - 3rd May'16 - Page 11

Chapter 6

I was in my recording room for a long time fine tuning the last song of my album, it must have been around three in the morning when I came to sleep, to my surprise Chashmish was awake - she wasn't working, she was just sitting on her make-shift bed as tears continuously flowed down her eyes - I was alarmed, I rushed to her and asked what was wrong, but she only noticed my presence after I shook her a little. But she wiped her tears away the moment she realized I was around - I asked her ample of times what was wrong, but she never told me. I had a bad feeling about this.

I observed her for a few more days, she was generally morose - no it wasn't evident, she had masked it well, but somehow I could see it, maybe because I knew for a fact that she was upset? After a week or so, when her mood didn't improve and she showed no signs of pulling out of the state, I decided to intervene again - but it was the same old set of responses - worried about ma's health, stressed about Bulbul's upcoming engagement, daadi's rising blood pressure etc. however this time there was an addition to the list - there was, college in it too. How could college also add to her distress? I thought that was her fall back - it got me thinking, and soon I found myself asking Purab to enquire in her college and see what's troubling her - I thought it would be difficult for him to figure out, but turns out Purab's little sister Purvi, she studied in the same college - from her he had gathered that Pragya has been visibly stressed ever since she got together with the new professor to write their piece. I was surprised. She had indeed mentioned about some paper that she was going to submit once her partner professor was finalized, but she was excited about it, why would that worry the day light out of her? Something was amiss, that I had figured, and I was going to find out what.

It was a Tuesday, I had requested Purab to block my calendar for the day for personal work. I saw her leave for college, she did look tired and forlorn, but not upset any longer, she looked resigned. I let her lead. I drove down to her college in another two hours, in disguise of course - on second thoughts, I didn't need to disguise at all - all these young guys, copied my style anyway! I had never come to her college before, I had no idea where she would be, but I had to look - on second thoughts I never even knew what subject she taught unless Purab mentioned she was Purvi's mathematics professor! That is how little I knew her on personal front, suddenly the realization struck. Maybe that's why she didn't share her issues with me, because I never tried knowing her? But I put those thoughts aside, I had to look for Pragya now - I was just walking aimlessly peeping from this classroom to that when my eyes fell on one particular professor teaching in a class - my brows furrowed. What on earth was this man doing here? I had seen him before! Once when there was a power failure in Kumkum Bhagya marriage hall, during Pragya and my wedding - this guy had silently come in and fixed the lights and gone, I had thought he was a handyman, but later when I had gone to Pragya's during our pagphere and saw him from her window, I had realized he was a neighbour. Well, he was just not a neighbour, there was more - he was the reason Pragya kept the window of her room shut. What was he doing here? He was a professor here too? But my thoughts were clouded by a sudden gasp followed by a running pair of feet coming towards me.

"Bhai! What are you doing here??" I heard a surprised Purvi gaping at me. Before I could answer, came her barge of questions - Purvi, like Purab has always been family. And Purvi like Purab has never stopped worrying for me and in the process scolding me!

"What are you doing her unannounced? Where is your bodyguard? Have you forgotten that you could be mobbed here? How irresponsible are you bhai? Wait till I tell Purab bhai about this. This is not done! What if my friends recognize you? Who will be responsible for your safety huh??" I laughed at her as she gunned me down with worried accusations. After pacifying her for a while, I casually asked her pointing at double battery and asked how they had such funny professors, to this she replied, "Arre bhai this is Prof. Suresh! In fact he and Pragya bhabi are writing a paper together - but he's so intimidating that nowadays even Pragya bhabi stays upset!" her answer helped me get out all the information I needed. I probed further, "So, if he is so intimidating, why didn't Pragya refuse to work with him?" she didn't seem to notice the edge in my voice, and replied innocently, "Arre bhai, we don't have any other econometrics professor in college nah! He is also very new, he joined just about a month back"

I hadn't met Pragya after that, I had come back home. I had all my answers - so Pragya was upset because Suresh was around her - double battery was bothering her. Now I needed to know how was he bothering her - he was around her, and that was irking what memories so harsh that my Chashmish had forgotten to smile? I had decided, I would get to the bottom of this

***

I was sitting in our balcony, thinking to myself, how was it that Suresh still bothered me so bad, his close friendly behaviour seemed to mock my love for him - I was married now, how was it that he still held such a strong place in my heart? Why did his indifference still manage to sting me? Wasn't I supposed to be immune to any other man after being married? Was I cheating on Abhishek? Then I sighed, how would I cheat on Abhishek? He never allowed me to be his wife in the right sense, nor was he my husband in the right sense - he had rejected me too, so he wouldn't even care if I like someone - but maybe meeting Suresh and realizing that I still love him, it made me release that slight angst that I was holding against him for still having Tanu in his life and loving her - now we were even.

The more time I spent with Suresh, the more I got convinced that he actually never saw me more than a friend, as a friend he understood my smallest needs, but he never saw my spirit falling every time he would dismiss one of our more than friends memories. It hurt me when he named the past - almost wedding situation between us as "our fiasco" for humour. It hurt when he did remember my small things casually, but he made no effort to make me feel special - the things that he knew about me was because he spent too much time with me, it was habit, he didn't remember my habits because he wanted to - somewhere that hurt me. Of course, I had never told him the real situation between me and Abhishek - I never earned his love, and I didn't need his sympathy. So he would keep talking about me and Abhishek, if he was a good husband, if he kept me happy - and I lied through my teeth everytime. This is turn would also break me inside - I was quiet and observing - I knew I was in a dark pit and there was no way out, but with Suresh in my life, even within the pit I was falling further down, deeper, in a darker abyss every moment - I never saw light anywhere anymore.

Suddenly I felt movement next to me, I jerked around and saw Abhishek sitting next to me in the balcony - I came back to the present. I didn't know when he had walked in, did he call me? Did I not respond? Judging by the way he was looking at me, he wanted to talk, and it was serious. I looked at him questioningly.

"Ei Chashmish, are you free?" he asked in his childish voice.

"Yeah, as in..." I muttered.

"Okay then, we are going out!" he replied, and before I could respond he pulled me up and took me back inside, followed me till I walked into the closet. I was surprised, where were we going? And I thought he wanted to talk serious! Trust Abhishek to confuse me!

He had taken me to a residential building - I didn't recognize this building, it was plush and fancy, when we walked in I was acutely uncomfortable, I didn't know whose place he was getting me to, was it a friend, a producer, for one wild moment I even wondered if it was Tanu's place. But as we walked in I realized it was his apartment, I read the name plate outside. What were we doing here? I walked into a well-designed hall, all done up in the shades of white, cream and beige - strangely it gave off the feeling of a plush hotel suite - it had a few impersonal paintings highlighted on the walls, there was a guitar placed at on corner, three huge different kind of sitting arrangements all done in the same room, depending on the mood - one formal setup, on friendly couch set, one sleek wooden setup, all together, yet each held a unique aura - there were expensive show pieces, exotic sculptures, massive off white curtains, Italian marble flooring, and it even had a minibar at one corner - the room was so massive and well done that I could look beyond or imagine what else this apartment could hold. I had even forgotten to question his intention - suddenly his voice from behind startled me - he was sitting on the wooden sofa and observing my actions. My hands instantly went back to curling the soft dupatta of my peach coloured anarkali suit.

"Chashmish, I have seen that you've been very low for a while, I thought of taking you out to cheer you up, but then I realized, I knew so less about you - so I though why not dedicate one entire evening to knowing each other better?" he told me calmly, his voice confident, his eyes holding mine firmly. I gulped, I was taken aback at the generosity, he had taken time out to know me? No-one had ever done that for me - he had seen I was upset, he cared and he wanted to make it better - the mere thought warmed me up a little from inside. I smiled.

That evening still remains one of the most enjoyable evenings of my life - we had made dinner together, as I had adviced we'll not order in and the cook had gone - I had made chole and he had tried making puri's (tried), we cooked together, making fun of each other's skills, I occasionally saved him from a burn or two, he helped me fetch things from the upper shelves, we had dinner talking, knowing each other, asking about our happiest moments, craziest experiences, funniest times, most embarrassing moments, hobbies we stopped pursuing, life choices we made, the untold dreams and also the past. I had opened my heart to Abhishek in a strange way that night - although we were long past just being compatible roomies in the Mehra Mansion now, but that night we bonded very strangely - I told him my deepest secrets and my hurt - and he listened, he cared, and he helped me in breaking out of the shadows from the past - in one single evening Abhishek became Suniye' for me - I was happy to have him, and sad to not have him completely.