Shaavi dear... This is for you - Page 4

Shaavi, I hope to GOd you are right and they do show that Sona and Boses are not picture perfect, bcos honestly they are far from it. DEv deserves to be shown in positive light at some point at least and I hope that does happen. I am quite sick of Sona's condescending attitude and DEv is practically begging her to give him one month's time to prove he can be a good father. All the Boses and Dixits seem to have forgotten that the man is actually not getting anything out of this whole arrangement. In fact, he is the only one losing his own identity in this deal yet he wants to keep at it. That deserves bucket loads of respect, understanding and awe not to mention gratitude from the wife who gets to pursue her dreams solely bcos of this man. Makers, please understand this, if, as a woman, I respect a man for something good that he does, I do not become smaller or weaker than him. Has nothing to do with feminism, just basic human courtesy to appreciate when someone sacrifices for us.

Originally posted by: JALK2000

Shaavi, I hope to GOd you are right and they do show that Sona and Boses are not picture perfect, bcos honestly they are far from it. DEv deserves to be shown in positive light at some point at least and I hope that does happen. I am quite sick of Sona's condescending attitude and DEv is practically begging her to give him one month's time to prove he can be a good father. All the Boses and Dixits seem to have forgotten that the man is actually not getting anything out of this whole arrangement. In fact, he is the only one losing his own identity in this deal yet he wants to keep at it. That deserves bucket loads of respect, understanding and awe not to mention gratitude from the wife who gets to pursue her dreams solely bcos of this man. Makers, please understand this, if, as a woman, I respect a man for something good that he does, I do not become smaller or weaker than him. Has nothing to do with feminism, just basic human courtesy to appreciate when someone sacrifices for us.

Originally posted by: Shaavi

JALK, after today's episode, I am quite sure that I am right in what I am saying. And Dev hiring that nanny proves that. I too agree that Sonakshi has to show some gratitude, but at this time will not show it as her facade is not broken yet. She still feels like she is the only one who can do what she is doing. And that overconfidence needs to be shattered. She hid Soha from Dev for 7 years. Didn't think that she needed to tell him. Even when he entered Soha's life, she constantly demeaned him and acted as though she was doing a favor to him in letting him be part of Soha's life. He had to kind of compete with Jotin for something that should have been his naturally. But it wasn't so. She didn't let even one instance go where she didn't tell him that he is replaceable, but even without Dev telling her, she assumed that she is irreplaceable. That she is the only one capable and competent.

Now Nikisha might not be in competition, nor Dev is trying to something wrong. As the kids get used to Nikisha whom they see for most part of their waking life, she will become someone important. Sonakshi has to experience Dev's pain when he was told that he is secondary to Jotin. She needs to experience that loss that Dev has felt. Only when she stands exactly in his place, with the pain he has suffered, will she realize the blunders she has committed. Only when she resents her actions will Bijoy realize what he has done in his haste, false pride and ego.

I am really liking the way the makers are telling this story. 😃

Originally posted by: asha2012

Hi Shaavi

I hope u dont mind me commenting here. I was a big fan of Devakshi and the serial in Season 1 but somehow am not feeling the same attachment now. Just a couple of things about what u wrote above:

I don't have any problem with your comments. Everyone is entitled to their thoughts and opinion.

I dont think that Sona thinks that she is perfect - she has her doubts which is why she keeps wanting to quit her work but Dev keeps encouraging her. I think this is true for every mother when she joins back after her kid.

Sorry to disagree, but Sonakshi DOES think that she is perfect. She doesn't think that she makes mistakes. She continuously justifies every one of her actions and doesn't think that she is wrong. Even in recent episode, she didn't accept that Dev is not the only one who is responsible for his absence in Soha's life for 7 years. She didn't bother to apologize nor share his guilt. Same with her wanting to quit the job. She not wanting to quit the job has very little to do with Dev encouraging her. She feels she doesn't have a choice, but to quit the job. And Dev is saying there are choices. There were n number of options than Sonakshi just choosing to quit the job. She could have worked from home, created flexible schedules for herself and Dev like him workingn 3 days in office, she the other 3 days or him going to office in the morning and she going in the afternoon. They could have a day care in office. But she is someone who always prefers only her way. She is not ready to compromise. As long as Sonakshi acts the way she is doing now, she will not learn anything. And she needs to learn to let go of her perfection image.

She, in my view is doing this more for Saurav than for herself - being perfectionist has nothing to do with it

Dev in his business trusts his team. He knows stuff, still he maintains a highly skilled team where he can rely on them in his absence. Even though he is the head, he is not the only person in the company. He trusts others to do their part and empowers and trusts them. He doesn't act as though "he is the only one competent to do the job". But Sonakshi behaves exactly like that. From her pov, she is the only one competent to do her job. She might be a good doctor,, but she is not the ONLY doctor in town. In the last 7 years, she could have created her own team of nutritionists. Even when she became pregnant, she could have planned in such a way so that she could take the time to stay at home. Why create a situation where you project as though you don't have a choice. One always has a choice and where there is a will, there is a way.

Why is she doing this for Saurabh. He should be able to handle the business. It once again goes back to her not showing confidence in his abilities. She could have truly shown her confidence in him and said in straight strong voice to everyone --Saurabh is capable, he can handle it. But she herself doesn't believe that. Because if she tells that then Saurabh wouldn't need her anymore, he would become independent. And Sonakshi cannot see anyone independent of her. She needs people to constantly "need"' her so that she can fuel her image of being an indispensable person. For her it is all about her image and has very little to do with Dev or Saurabh. She is also a narcissist just like Ishwari.

Secondly I agree she did wrong by hiding Soha's truth from Dev for seven years. However, dont u think that Dev should have made some effort to find their whereabouts even when he had an inkling that the Boses lost their home that night

I also believe, that as a woman, what Dev told her the night they split was unforgivable. When he knew that she would have a problem having a child (even before she did) - he told her that she did not fulfill her responsibility as a wife as she was unable to bear a child.

Why should Dev go behind a person who is leaving him. If Dev left her, so did she. If Dev hurled insults at her, so did she. At least he told her those things in private. But Sonakshi didn't leave even a single chance of insulting him,, that too in public. She constantly called him loser, spineless and mamma's boy in public and that too in front of his and her employees. She didn't show any respect to him at any given time and behaved as though he is some worthless person. What she did is unforgivable too and maybe even more than what Dev might have told her.

Fine Dev did a mistake. But what was Soha's mistake in that she didn't get to experience her father's love for 7 years of her life. What was her fault that she had to live for 7 years without knowing her papa. Yet Sonakshi doesn't have the courtesy to apologize to either Dev or Soha for her mistakes of keeping them apart.

That last bit, I suspect was what stopped Sona from revealing about Soha to Dev

Anyway, this was purely my point of view. Do let me know if I offended you or anyone else on this thread and I will remove it from here.

Cheers

Asha

I can never agree that Sonakshi is the better of the two just because she is a woman. I am not ok with any of the justifications that she keeps giving nor the attitude of Boses towards Dev or Dixits, especially Bijoy's. Sonakshi did more harm to Dev and ruined his life just so that she can feel "mahaan", to gratify her upbringing, to prove herself that she is better than him. It is like Kareena's dialogue in Aitraaz -- mujhe aitraaz hai. There even though Kareena is also a woman, she doesn't agree that what Priyanka did was right. Here I am not saying that what Sonakshi did was/is right. She has to face the consequences of her actions, just like everybody else, no exceptions. And that is what I have written.

Shaavi

@Shaavi

Take a bow .Awesome response .Sonakshi Bose gets away easily only because she is a WOMAN.

My husband watches the show sometimes and was a big fan of Sonakshi till the marriage track but off late he feels staying married to Sonakshi is not a easy and never wishes to be married to women who is constantly on a mission to prove how perfect she is and how she is better than her spouse in all aspects .As per him , only a person who lacks self confidence can be happily married to her and there can be no better partner to her than Dev who suffers from low esteem

@Lakshmi

Awesome post and trust me whatever you wrote will be shown in last episode.I am thanking my stars that season 3 is only for 6 weeks .Even in those 6 weeks they leave no chance to show Perfect Sonakshi and guilty Dev .

@Lakshmi

Originally posted by: yyy

@Shaavi

Take a bow .Awesome response .Sonakshi Bose gets away easily only because she is a WOMAN.

My husband watches the show sometimes and was a big fan of Sonakshi till the marriage track but off late he feels staying married to Sonakshi is not a easy and never wishes to be married to women who is constantly on a mission to prove how perfect she is and how she is better than her spouse in all aspects .As per him , only a person who lacks self confidence can be happily married to her and there can be no better partner to her than Dev who suffers from low esteem

@Lakshmi

Awesome post and trust me whatever you wrote will be shown in last episode.I am thanking my stars that season 3 is only for 6 weeks .Even in those 6 weeks they leave no chance to show Perfect Sonakshi and guilty Dev .

@Lakshmi

Originally posted by: Shaavi

Thanks Nitu. Ishwari couldn't have a high self esteem son and have control over him. And when they were poor she needed complete control over his actions so that she can ensure that he is focused on fulfilling her dreams. Sonakshi is the same. For her it is about her "love story". she wants it go exactly as she envisions it. Both Ishwari and Sonakshi doesn't think of Dev as a person in his own sense nor pay attention to his feelings. They constantly try to define what he is supposed to feel and what he is supposed to do. They both treat Dev as though he is just an extension of them and that he doesn't have any brains of his own. I feel really bad for him and men like him.😃

I agree with you! I think Dev has reflected and understood this as well...post leap he constantly blamed Sonakshi and Ishwari for his state! All his current actions are a reaction to the same... he is doing what he wants and makes sure everybody around him agrees to his decisions (come what may!)...he is making sure all follow his script 👏 ...

I really hope the prenup truth comes out this season...it could help both the great Mothers step down from their heavenly abode of pride:D My gut feeling is Ishwari doesn't know the specific clauses in it re. to divorce and children. She doesn't know to read English and went by what the lawyer said. Sonakshi is not aware of the fact that Dev was cheated by his own mom! The prenup clauses could also be one of the reasons of hiding Soha's birth... Bijoy and ASHA read it out before the wedding and might have shared with Sona at a later stage... 😉

@shaavi @lakshmi

Nitu