Hey ppl... How is ur sunday going? Its almost evening over here... i was watching Kolkata Vs Chennai IPL match... Kolkata batting first. I was sleeping initially. When I got up, Kolkata were 83 for 2... I thot not bad... I was so sleepy to concentrate in the match so I went to wash my face.. when I came back, they had already hit 2 fours... so I started seeing the match... Whenever I was distracted, they were hitting off well... I saw the Ntini over... first two wickets.. that were the two balls I concentrated well... š and the wickets fell.. then my brother suggested to remove my specs and watch the match š Now I am out of the room... š
Okay, I think this part is also short... I fell asleep typing it... So hot in the day time... Now its better... Will try to post the next part of this subpart in the working days sometime when I get time to finish it...
Previous Parts:
Part 1 - Page 1; Part 2 - Page 3; Part 3 - Page 6; Part 4 - Page 9; Part 5 - Page 12;
Flashback 1: (1.1-1.3) - Page 16; 1.4 - Page 23; 1.5 - Page 26; 1.6 - Page 30; 1.7 - Page 33; 1.8 - Page 35; 1.9 - Page 38; 1.10 - Page 41; 1.11 - Page 45;
Part 6 - Page 48; Part 7 - Page 53; Part 8 - Page 58;
Flashback 2 - Page 62;
Part 9 - Page 65; Part 10 - Page 68;
Flashback 3 A - Page 73; 3B - Page 76; 3C - Page 79; 3D - Page 81; 3E - Page 86; 3F - Page 89;
Part 11 - Page 94; Part 12 - Page 97;
Flashback 4 - Page 97
Part 13 - Page 103;
Journey into Bani's thoughts: 1 - Page 107; 2 - Page 111;
Here goes the next part:
Journey into Bani's thoughts - 3
(Note: The dialogues in the brackets is not written in the diary. It is written for the understanding of the reader and for them to know what was going in Bani's mind when she wrote.)
Jai closed his eyes for few minutes and sat at the place like that. Earlier, when Pushkar had told that Bani does sketching, he was surprised, but he never expected it to make such an impact on him. Now, the thoughts of Bani started scaring him. He could not believe the fact that he and his family meant so much to her. She was truthful with her memories. She had never let anyone else whom she knew to enter the zone of her memories except them. Except themā¦ He remembered the day Aditya had called him and said that their Bani had come backā¦ and that she was their Baniā¦ But he did not realize the meaning of his words, at that time. Now, he had started to realize. And also that he realized lateā¦ Jai wiped his trickling tears with the back of his hand and opened his eyes. He looked beside him where he had kept the other papers and her diary. It started to scare him. He couldn't believe that Bani has become an unanswered puzzle to him. He suddenly felt thirsty. He got up on his feet and helped himself with a glass of water. He kept the glass back on the night stand. He remembered something. He opened the drawer and took out Bani's photograph. He looked at it for sometime and came and sat down at the previous position along with the photograph. He placed it before him on the floor at the convenient position and settled back at his position.
He looked at the papers lying down and took it in his hands. He looked at the papers carefully. It seemed to have been torn from a diary. He took the first paper and kept it down inverted. He looked at the next paper. There was something written. Jai started to read.
Aunty, Kab miloongi aapse? Mujhe yahaan bilkul achcha nahin lag raha. Mujhe aapke paas wapas aana hai. Mujhe yahaan nahin rehna. Dekhiye na, yahaan pe koi teek se baat hi nahin kar raha hai. Lekin pata hai, main apne aap hi school jaati hoon, apne aap apni sari kaam karti hoon. Badi ho gayi hoon na? Pata hai aunty, main first aayi hoon class mein. Lekin yeh school mujhe utna achcha nahin laga. Sab log badi badi baatein kar rahe hai. Mujhe bilkul achcha nahin lag raha. Pata hai, aunty. Yeh jagah itni badi hai ki kabhi kabhi darr lagta hai ki kahin kho na jaaoon. Aunty, Jai mujhe chodke kyun chala gaya? Maine toh koi shararati nahin ki usseā¦ Toh phir kyun chala gaya mujhe chodkar? Main usse gussa hoonā¦ Main usse baat nahin karoongiā¦ Use meri koi fikar hi nahin haiā¦ Woh bahut bura haiā¦
Jai laughed slightly inspite of himself. He could imagine her speaking that to his mother pouting and making faces. Also, he could imagine well what would have happened if he would have appeared in front of her at that time. The fact was she wouldn't have spoken, but he would definitely make her speak. He knew well she couldn't resist him for a long time. He turned the page.
Jai, pata hai. Tumne mujhe cycle chalana sikhaya tha naā¦ maine teek se hi chalayi thi naā¦ Lekin, papa ne cycle laake dene mana kar diya. Keh rahe the ki main teek terah se chala nahin paaongi. Agar tum hote toh papa se keh sakte theā¦ Mujhe bus mein jaane mein darr lag raha hai. Maa ne kaha ki school bus se public bus cheap haiā¦ Lekin main seekh loongi. Agli baar jab tumse miloongi tab main tumhein ye jagah bus mein jaake dikhaoongi. Lekinā¦ tumse kab miloongi?
Jai turned the next page.
Aunty, aaj ek ladki se saath jagda ho gaya school mein. Maine kuch nahin kiya. Woh meri pen leke waapas nahin ki. Maine usse poocha toh usne kaha ki kahin kho di usneā¦ maine usse poocha tohā¦ mujhe pasand nahin aayi uski baat. Main kisiko apni cheez nahin doongiā¦ kho dengeā¦
(Krishna telling, Bani pen hi toh hai. Uske liye jagda karne ki kya zaroorat hai?)
Nahin auntyā¦ meri baat nahin maanege. Aap samaj nahin rahi hai meri baat. Maine kuch nahin kaha usse. Main toh bas usse maang rahi thi apni penā¦ Jaiā¦ dekho naaā¦ aunty meri baat maan nahin rahi haiā¦
(Jai telling, Teek hai. Main deta hoon tumhein ek pen. Okay?)
Mujhe nahin chahiye tumhari penā¦ mujhe apni pen chahiyeā¦
(Jai telling, Woh sab chodoā¦ Aaj bus kaisa laga?)
Achcha lagaā¦ Seekh loongiā¦
(Jai telling, Mujhe pata haiā¦)
Jai stopped at that page itself. He felt the dialogues incomplete. He was not able to understand the whole part. But somewhere he started to realize somewhere something is wrong.
He read the following pages. He started to understand that she was having some sort of conversation withā¦ with someoneā¦ more than some oneā¦ it was him, his mother and his father.
The last piece of the diary was ā
Jai, main tumhein kab dekhoongiā¦?
(Kyun?)
Kyun ka kya matlab? Tumhein mujhe dekhna nahin kya?
Kuch bolo na? Tum mujhse door kyun chale gaye? Ab dekho main bhi door chali gayiā¦ Ab kab milenge?
Pata haiā¦ Kal essay writing competition haiā¦
(Tum participate kar rahi ho na?)
Nahinā¦ mujhe interest nahin haiā¦ Competitions bahut bore haiā¦
(Agar participate nahin karogi toh tumhein pata kaise chalega ki tum kitni achchi ho?)
Kyun? Main achchi nahin hoon kya?
(Bani, mera woh matlab nahin thaā¦)
Tum teek keh rahe hoā¦ Main buri hoonā¦ Isliye toh tum mujhe chodkar chale gayeā¦
Tears started to fall from Jai's eyes. He understood how much his running away had affected her. He should not have left her aloneā¦ Atleast, he should have made her self-sufficient. He did not do that. Jai, for the first time felt ashamed for running away from her. His running away had not only affected their relationship, but had made deep impact on Bani in an unexplainable way. Till now, he only enjoyed the positive side of his running away. The other side, which he had failed to see before was facing him in an unexpected wayā¦
Thanks for reading š³
Udne Ki Aasha
Hollywood
