FF:Breathless: Tryst with Fate (Chap 4 updated page 1 (23.03.16)) - Page 9

Originally posted by: maniwood

Awesome update dear!!

First of all I want to praise your writing style... Very nice I love stories where I can imagine and see it 😆

Jodha totally in love with him...so cute Yeah, she could not forget that black orbs.

And she defeated suryabhan that's cool 😆 She was a spirited women. Nothing could stop her.

Thanks for the pm and update soon 😊 sure

Originally posted by: Ashvneet2399

Res

Originally posted by: amitaprasad

very interesting story.please update soon.

Originally posted by: lashy

Beautiful update Deeps, though it felt quite short... (contrary to your fear that the update is getting long😛) Yeah, agree. I felt it after I updated. But the other part would have made it long.

The scenes at the street market and fair were very vivid and one could totally imagine them as they were meant to happen... Yes, I did want readers to imagine the markets & fair, which were meant to be totally colorful & festive.

You've obviously given thought to the finer points - be it Jodha hiding her feminity during a match or Mynawati curious to enquire which 'direction' the prospective groom was to come from ... Nice!!!!

Glad you noticed the finer points. The purpose of writing those scenes is achieved.

Waiting for the Diwali encounter and sparks/fireworks to display themselves again. Yes the next one is going to be a Diwali Damaka. 😉

Originally posted by: Bindu_nhbr

Beautiful👏

Originally posted by: Geetbaala

Beautiful chappy Deepu👏

The details of market and the competition was so clear for us to imagine the streets where she was roaming disguising as a commoner. Hmm... glad you could imagine it thru words.😉

She was completely immersed in magic of black orbs... Yes, those black orbs were powerful😳

And amazing part was she defeated Suryabhan in disguised as Rajput lad. One hell of a spirited woman she was. Nothing was impossible for her.

Poor Jo got disappointed wen she heard that the man whom she got attracted belongs to her enemy. Yes, she was surely disappointed. Who would not be. 😆

It was short Deepu wen I finished reading I didn't realize... Yeah, it felt short, but had 2.7k words😲

Now waiting for the other part of the teaser.. Update soon sure will do. Working on the details

Originally posted by: Kalgi22

Aww wonderful chap Deeps 😳 Loved it. ❤️ You well described Jodha's state of mind and Mainavathi's state of mind. Yeah, different shades of emotions. 😉

Poor Suryabhan... Better luck next time 😆 Yeah better luck next time. Lets not tell him that a women defeated him. 😆Well Guruma too exists in your story? 😉 Yes, she exists to bring about twists.😆

You very well managed to keep the breathless in the air👏 Loved it. Now waiting for the Dewali mela Sure, working on it.

Originally posted by: harshu27

beautiful update deeps...loved it 2 d core... 😳 so jo has been looking fr dat dark orbs so has managed to take her breath away... 😉 it was fun to read abt d sword fights btw surya and jo thou she was in disguise of a soldier but still none could knw her identity and she easily defeated surya and left like a lighting electricity.. Glad you liked reading about it. Yes, for a spirited person nothing is impossible. 😉 😆 update soon... 😳

Originally posted by: Deepasub

Thanks Bindu.

Assuming that you have exams. But appreciate that you came here to leave your short comment.🤗Good luck with your studies.