Originally posted by: Kaana
Hey Radhila, lovely to have you back. And as always there is no death for your extra kind words. Thanks a bunch.
Thanks and welcome! 😆
You have given me an assignment now, asking such a question!!!!
My quick response here to your query. I owe Rima one too and hopefully it might provide some answers too.
Pl bear with me, and if I can share my thoughts too while I respect your views, I am not sure if I would want to agree with two things stated - Jalal abandoned her yet again, Jodha's fear of being abandoned again. In my humble view, based on my understanding so far, this is not in their character. A quick reason: he did not just abandon her when she committed suicide, twice?, Jodha's temperament and Rajvanshiness may not lend this fear possible.
Jalal's POV - no point in continuing on a relationship which has fallen apart. And does it make sense to continue to live together in the palace in such a state? So, in this situation, as understood then by him, only option is to separate and he freed her of the rishta. Giving an ultimatum to leave by the first ray of tom morning, was an emotional outcome of a devastated soul. Is it justified? Yes and No, in my view. I suppose, earlier also when he was ready to give talaq, he was trying to do a prayaschit for his act of cruelty to her so long. This was not abandoning as such - but done with a genuine intent to relieve her of the pain she undergoes here and send her back to a place where she will be happy. However, whether this act per say is right is something that is questionable. In the process he has caused more pain to her. That is the Jalal!!!!
From Radhika: I respect your views Kaana. But I still believe that he should not have taken the extreme step of relieving her from the relationship in the heat of the moment. What he said could be excused. But he should have allowed himself time to cool down before taking a rash decision (of asking her to leave). Someone told me recently that one should never do something permanently stupid just because one is temporarily upset.
After the MC track, he may have viewed his offer of talaq as a benevolent gesture. But when we give someone a gift, we must see what they want, not what we would like to give. He should have known that for a Rajvanshi woman, taking talaq and returning to her parents' home is not an option. You have mentioned that he saved her from suicide twice. The first time, he saved her for the sake of the prestige of the Mughal sultanat, not because he feared losing her. Only the second time was he scared of losing her because he had developed feelings for her. And anyway, the second time cannot be termed as a suicide because her intention was not to kill herself but to save Jalal.
Jodha's POV - trust fallen apart, relationship broken and abandoned, vachan not adhered to, would like to move out. It is a fact that she also wanted to move out, though husband order has been given as a reason and maybe a reason also. For that matter, technically, she has abandoned him at all these times stated. So per say fear of being abandoned by someone may not fit in well for her is my view, I may be wrong also. But she is very much disturbed, not happy and tired of Jalal's two way behaviour.
@underlined: I don't know, Kaana. I have not got this feeling that she wanted to move out.Being a Rajvanshi, she would have stuck it out with him till death, considering it as part of her duty. I believe she left only because he specifically asked her to. If he had just said all those words but not asked her to go, she would not have gone. This is my considered opinion. But we can always disagree on this amiably. 😊
@bold: I do not understand this at all, I am afraid. How can Jodha be said to have abandoned him? If he asks her to go and she goes, is that abandoning on her part? When she attempted suicide after MC track, he had asked her to pack up and go to Amer and even called her mother to take her back. If she attempted suicide in her condition because both her husband and mother didn't want her, how can she be said to be abandoning him?
When she drank poison to save his life, she did not wilfully take a decision to die or to abandon him and go away (to heaven).
In Friday's episode also, she didn't abandon him. She has been telling him repeatedly that she needs time to heal. She expected that as her husband, he would understand this and give her the space and time required by her to heal. But he mistook this to be her guroor. Instead of trying to understand what she actually wanted from him, or at least allowing her to recuperate in privacy, he was pressuring her to hurry up the process and return with him. Just as he couldn't stay back indefinitely in Amer, she also couldn't go to Agra with a conflicted mind.
At no point did she tell him to leave. In fact, she would have liked Jalal to have stayed at Amer for a few days, but in an unobtrusive yet supportive manner. When he informed her that he was leaving without her, she was stunned to say the least. She had tears in her eyes. Why I said he was "abandoning" (Notice the quotes 😃) her is that when she would have wanted his support in recuperating, he was walking away, leaving her bereft of that emotional support. If he had stayed and supported her, as he did when she freed her hand and ran away, she would have been insulated from her family's pressure too.
If I'm reading your words incorrectly, please clarify. Because I didn't quite get the abandoning part.
Life at Mathura: It was not a normal life in that she was getting depressed by Jalal thoughts. However, it was normal compared to now Amer or even before Jalal came to Mathura. This in my view could be because, till the time she saw him at Mathura, there was no clue that he is coming to get her back. She could have resigned to her new life of her own, pained and lonely life, which she is now coming to terms with. She had then no option of going back anyway, not that she wanted to. She accepted it as the way forward and was trying to settle in it.
I agree. It was not normal. But she was trying to make it as normal as possible under the circumstances.
But at Amer, things are different - she is pressurized on all possible grounds to return with him by Jalal, she is asked to go back in a way by her own folks, she cannot be not going back given her feelings for him and she does not want to go back being let down. And, there is an option to go back now, unlike before. She does not want to avail it, but do not want to let go it as well. So, when Jalal chose to return without her (not abandoned her - he had no option and was repeatedly asked to leave anyway), which maybe was quite unexpected by her, she is unable to come to terms with it. I am happy with this act of Jalal, she needed this jolt to come back to reality and now take some concrete steps, even if it takes some time. But without this, she may just be only sulking away and maybe in self sympathy while missing him also. But now, she is pushed to some action. Unlike Mathura, she cannot find any comfort in this state as she now very much has the option to go back to Jalal now (which is very much there at the bottom of her heart).
She always had the option to go back to him. Bharmal told her she could assert her rights as a daughter of the house. She could have asserted her rights as the daughter-in-law of the house and gone back to Agra at any time. But she wants to go there only when she is healed completely. As and when she wants to.
Regd your point 'Leaving her to pick up the pieces of yearning and feelings once more' - am not sure of this, as this is the first time this is happening after he knows of her love for him (may not apply to showdown night also). All these days, he was not even sure of her feelings. Again, he cannot be held responsible for leaving to Agra without her, it is absolutely Jodha's decision.
@bold: A person can break someone's heart without knowing the other person loves them. Jalal too need not be aware of her feelings to crush them. She knew on the night of the showdown and on Friday that she loves him. So when he asked her to leave on the showdown night and when he walked away on Friday, both times, he walked over her feelings.
@underlined: It was Jodha's decision. correct. but he drove her to that decision. If he had not pestered her continually for forgiveness but tried to understand what was going on in her mind, he would have known that she didn't want his apology but his respect for her identity.
And to specifically answer your last Q, the transformation has to happen in both and it is a gradual process. And there are no stated or specific actions that could instill any new impression or bring it to the desired state. Just like situations, approaches, behaviour, actions and reactions and impressions played a role in building the trust that was before this track, same even now.
Earlier, they were together and could see the changes in each other. Now they are away from each other. How can they know the transformation happening in the other person?
Separation is also expected to reveal a lot to Jodha herself. And, the new built trust in Jalal cannot be based only on Jalal's effort, but Jodha has a role in it too. She has to do her homework as well. Likewise, it cannot be achieved just by Jodha too, with her own self realisation. It has to be reassured by Jalal as well. So, both have a role to play to bring them together on a safe, strong ground.
Hope that I have been even partially successful in my attempt to answer you. Awaiting to hear your thoughts too. And you by now know how my brain works 😊, just tried to look at both sides!
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