Nachiket sat alone on their 11th floor balcony, a cup of lukewarm coffee by his side. He was restless, impatient and apologetic.
Apologetic of his behaviour towards the one person in the whole world he loved the most. Sure he did love his parents, his sister and friends; but he was in love with Ragini, his wife who at every juncture, every moment, took his breath away.
He wanted nothing more but to beg for her forgiveness, but knew that she would be fast asleep by now. The clock at the nearby church had struck a single gong a few minutes ago.
When they had married two years ago, they had decided that they would never ever go to bed angry, they would try to resolve their issues first, discuss about the same and communicate.
But tonight, he had hurt her badly. Almost as if to take revenge of the hurt feeling that he has been nursing since evening.
...
They had made love that night.
Frenzied, angry, punishing and all consuming.
And finally, when a single teardrop had rolled down her cheek, did he realize that it had nothing to do with love at all. He had been punishing her, all the while.
...
All this had started with a simple invite to attend a friend's Anniversary celebrations the evening before.
Nachiket had been working around the clock for the past few days and desperately needed a break. Within a short time, he had already established himself as an excellent Doctor and the Hospital had shown their faith on him by entrusting him with difficult cases. The deluge of cases sometimes felt difficult to handle.
He had finally been able to get some time off time for himself. For her. He wanted to spend some quality time with Ragini, doing nothing, just lazing around at home and maybe wandering around the city a bit, aimlessly.
He had known that Ragini was also keeping longer hours at work recently and seemed a bit stressed out. They worked at the same Hospital; yet they hardly met - such were their schedules.
In fact, when Ragini had joined the same Hospital, he had joked that Ragini had done so to keep an eye on him, to ensure that he did not go around flirting blatantly with all the nurses there. Ragini had laughed out loud at the joke and had then rewarded him with a kiss.
...
Nachiket knew Abhinav, whose wedding anniversary they had been invited to. Abhinav had been one of those admirers of Ragini who had refused to give up even after Ragini got married. Initially, Nachiket had found it funny but when Abhinav started showing up at their place at odd hours, Nachiket had started reacting. Not because he didn't trust Ragini, but because he didn't want Abhinav to take advantage of Ragini, who being true to her sweet and kind self, was kind of surviving those visits.
He had tried speaking to Ragini about the same, but Ragini had brushed away his doubts by saying that she was just trying to help Abhinav move ahead.
So finally, when Abhinav had visited their pad to announce his wedding, Nachiket's happiness knew no bounds. He had been more happy than the bridegroom himself.
And now this same Abhinav had invited them to his 1st Anniversary, which Nachiket had no intention of attending, especially after such a bone crushing schedule.
He had informed Ragini of his intentions and rather wanted to take her out for Dinner, to this quaint little place that she loved visiting. He loved to see her smile.
...
He had reached home that evening to an empty apartment. There was a note from Ragini mentioning that she had gone to Abhinav's anniversary party. Both his wife and Abhinav had personally requested her over phone to join them and she didn't have it in her heart to tell them no. She had requested Nachiket to come and pick her up for their Dinner.
Nachiket was annoyed. He had been looking forward to spending some alone time with her, but knew that it would not be happening for some time, at least..
He however knew that Ragini would be waiting for him for the Dinner. Sighing inwardly, he had freshened up and left for the party.
Traffic ensured that he reached the venue almost after an hour. By this time, he had definitely lost his cool.
...
He had entered the hall to find the venue overflowing with people. He had looked all around to locate Ragini - he wanted to wish the couple and get moving, so that they could make it to Dinner while it was still time.
Somebody had called out Ragini's name. Nachiket had turned around to find his wife engrossed in conversation with some friends. She was laughing and chatting freely, and was the cynosure of all eyes. She looked stunning in a deep maroon silk saree, his favourite. He had realised instinctively that she had actually dressed for him. His mood had lightened a bit.
As he had started making his way towards the group, Abhinav had suddenly woven his way into the group and had slipped his arm around Ragini's waist. Nachiket had stopped dead in his tracks. At that very moment, Ragini had looked up and their eyes had clashed. Nachiket had turned around immediately; he hadn't waited long enough to see Ragini extract herself out of Abhinav's arms, and then push him away, anger all too written clearly across her face.
She had followed her husband out of the hall and when she finally found him, he had been standing in front of the car, waiting for her, seething in anger.
She had wanted to explain, but on seeing her, he had just slid inside the car and turned on the ignition. Sensing his mood, Ragini had not said another word and had slid inside the car, in turn. She had known then and there that there would be no dinner that night.
...
She had tried to explain once when they had reached home. But there had been no response from Nachiket. And when she had confronted him, he had reacted almost violently, by pulling her close to him and then by brutally kissing her.
Ragini had been stunned ... this is not the Nachiket she knew. She had tasted blood and had tried to peel herself away from him, but had then given in finally. She had tried to connect with him, but realised that he had closed his mind. For time being.
..
Present time
Nachiket threw away the coffee in the sink and kept he cup down with a clatter. The inside of his mouth tasted bitter, almost like what he had been feeling some time back.
The lamp on his side of the bed was still glowing dimly. Ragini's face was turned away to the other side. She had been sobbing some time back, he knew.
He slid down slowly into the bed, not wanting to disturb her, and lay down almost at the edge. He felt repulsive and wanted to cry. But tears evaded him.
He turned off the light and kept staring at the darkness wondering what had just happened. Was this his baser inner self which couldn't handle jealousy? Couldn't handle his wife being happy without him, for even a second? Couldn't trust his wife doing he right thing, just because he hadn't felt like doing so? Or just plain not trusting Ragini enough ?
He didn't know how he would face Ragini the next morning. How could he reclaim her love once again?
...
Next Morning
Nachiket had woken up to the sounds of Ragini moving around in the kitchen.
He realised that he mercifully fallen asleep, and had managed a few hours of sleep. He padded to the kitchen. Ragini had been already dressed for work; she had placed his breakfast and the coffee jug on the table. She had informed him in a broken voice that there was an emergency and she needed to go in earlier, all the while avoiding his eyes.
Nachiket had felt his whole world collapse as he quietly watched his wife leave. he had wanted to curse himself for being such a chauvinistic pig, but realised that he would have to rectify the situation fast. He couldn't lose Ragini, at any cost.
...
Their day at the Hospital was pretty uneventful. Nachiket and Ragini had once met in the corridor, but Ragini had immediately excused herself and rushed off to the paediatric wing.
...
That Evening
He had dragged his feet from the elevator to their apartment, once he reached home late evening. He had been sure that Ragini would feel uncomfortable around him and he was contemplating his next steps.
He had opened the door with his set of keys, not wanting to bother her. But he had known in his heart that this was the perfect time to make things right.
Throwing his coat on the sofa carelessly, he had walked into the kitchen where Ragini was busy preparing dinner. Her back was turned towards him, but he could hear her sniffling.
His heart broke into a million pieces.
Next thing he knew, he had crossed the distance between them and pulled her in his arms, the ladle clanging into the pan from her hands. He had held her close to his heart, wishing he could show her how he felt. He had held her lightly yet protectively, his chin resting on top of her head, tears rolling down his cheek.
After a while, her arms had gone round his waist as she held onto him tightly, as she cried her heart out.
'I am sorry, Ragini', he had somehow blurted out 'I am so sorry ...'
He stopped in mid way as she muffled into his shirt
'How could you ever think ...I could never ... Only you ...'
Her words had stayed unsaid as a fresh bout of tears wracked through her frame.
Nachiket had held her protectively, close to his heart. He realised that she had given him a rare chance to make things right once again. And right he would make things.
The jealousy which had gotten better of him last night - he definitely needed to take care of it. And to show her again and again that his love for her was not worthless.
She was too precious. Priceless. And he would strive to be a better man for her. To be with her. To be there for her. Always. For eternity.
The End
