RiKara OS - Unbroken

It had been a year to the day since she'd left.

Looking at Omkara Singh Oberoi, one wouldn't know that it made any difference to him. His own family had struggled with the guilt of what they'd unwittingly done to the young woman they'd accepted as their bahu and Omkara's wife. They hadn't known even half of the real story, which hadn't come out till well after she'd left, but while most family members had shown their grief at their mistakes, the main culprit in their eyes had stood curiously untouched by it all.

Omkara Singh Oberoi had shown no remorse, not tried to find his so-called wife, not shed a single tear in her absence and never taken her name again. He'd simply gone on with life... for sure, it was a very different life than before, but not for a day had he expressed any remorse or repentance in front of the family and for them that had become his biggest crime over the past year.

He'd started going to office like Tej had always wanted him to, his studio had stayed shut for the entire year, his hair was always in a business appropriate ponytail, his dhoti pants and vests had been relegated to the back of his closet, to be replaced by suits that rivaled his older brother's in their sharpness.

The rebellious artist Omkara had been replaced by the entirely socially acceptable scion of the business family, OSO. His transformation along with his lack of grief, guilt or any form of repentance had led to his Dadi, his mom and Anika purposefully distancing themselves from him... it seemed to be something he accepted without protest, indeed even welcomed it. It was their way of punishing him and he didn't have any problem with it. OSO didn't need anyone around him... in fact he'd become more of a loner than before.

The only people in the family who seemed stubbornly on his side even a year into the fiasco were his brothers. Shivaay and Rudra always had and always would believe in their Om. They knew that he was to blame in the entire disaster with Gauri, they could see that he hadn't repented in the usual ways but their faith in their brother and their love for him wouldn't let them desert him. Shivaay and Rudra were helpless to say or do anything for their brother as they saw Omkara withdraw from everyone, turn into someone he clearly was not and act as if a tsunami hadn't wiped out everything in his life. In the beginning, Shivaay had been very worried about the changes in him, distraught that he might go back to drugs and lose control this time. But as the days passed and Omkara became completely replaced by OSO, Shivaay's worries about drugs had also become replaced by something entirely different.

The days after Gauri's departure from their lives were still fresh in their minds like it was yesterday. Om had completely sealed himself into his room for a couple of days, not responding to anything or anyone. When Shivaay and Rudy had broken in on the third, they'd seen a completely different room and an entirely different brother.

The room was spick and span, no trace of any of his art or art supplies. The closet was open and entirely empty, all his clothes were packed up neatly in bags that stood innocently against the walls. Omkara himself was different... his hair had been gathered in a ponytail that looked way more mainstream that any of his previous styles and his clothes were some that Shivaay had gotten him as a joke a long while back.

"I need some suits Shivaay... can you recommend someone who'll make me some on short notice?"

These were the first words Om had spoken two days after their bulbul Bhabhi had left the house. Astounded, Shivaay had said something nonsensical and Om had just looked at him quizzically before walking out of the house.

Since then, the only Omkara that was visible to anyone was this one. He was polite, courteous, always on the ball and quite cunning when it came to business. OSO was extremely creative... as creative in the boardroom as he'd been on canvas. He got it done by hook or crook and he'd made a certain reputation for ruthlessness in the business world in just a year, something that even his father had had to spend many more trying to achieve.

And to top it all off, he'd finally done something that no one, not even he had expected.

For the first time in 6 years, Shivaay Singh Oberoi wasn't the Businessman of the Year. This year, it was the younger brother, the black sheep of the family, Omkara Singh Oberoi who was given that award. Usually, the entire Oberoi family came to cheer on their elder son and no one missed the fact that this year, it was only his brothers who came, but the strength of their cheering put entire countries to shame.

Shivaay and Rudra might've looked proud and happy at their brother's achievement but the man of the hour wasn't looking very happy himself. In fact, there was a wistful, almost lost expression on his face and while his thank you speech had been perfectly on point, there was no trace of the philosophical shayar Om in the words that tumbled out of his mouth. He should be happy... he'd finally succeeded in the goal he'd set himself exactly one year ago. The irony of the situation, receiving his Businessman of the Year award on that very day, wasn't anywhere near lost on him.

Today, he'd succeeded. He'd finally succeeded in completely killing, burning and burying the Omkara that had caused so much hurt. He'd deliberately, thoughtfully and exhaustively pulled every little bit of the old Omkara out, destroyed himself from the inside and taken pleasure in watching himself burn away into ashes.

Because he deserved it... he deserved every bit of the pain and more. He needed to feel the pain to know that he was still alive... Breathing was a chore and the pain of his irreparably broken heart was a constant companion. But this companion he welcomed like a man needing his fix. He'd just traded his drug habit for this pain and now its very presence made him feel better... if he felt the pain, he was still here and he could continue on this path he'd set for himself. This path that could lead to one day... maybe, just maybe becoming worthy. Worthy of... her.

Not that he was ever going to force her back into his life. Never again would he even try to see her, go in front of her or contact her in any way. Gauri had left him and he understood. He'd taken his own sweet time in figuring out the truth but now that he knew what he did, he would never even think of forcing her back into his life. He was doing this as much for himself as for her... even if she would never know of it.

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Gauri Kumari Sharma had walked out of his life. She'd vowed that she wouldn't turn around and even look at him even if he begged. But even as she thought it, she knew... her Omkara wouldn't beg. He would never come after her... he would silently punish himself and wallow in his own pain. When he came to know of the truth and he would... he would punish himself for his actions but he wouldn't open up about it to anyone, probably not even his brothers unless they forced him to.

So she moved on with her life... or she attempted to. Every night, when her eyes would close in exhaustion, she would dream of him. It was never the same... always a different dream but they were always, always of him. She never tried to do anything to change that, having him in her life even in this capacity, was good enough for her. She'd never held any expectations from him in real life and the dreams satisfied her craving for his presence in her life... so she dreamed, every night.

And during the day, she tried not to think about him. But it was difficult considering just how the media seemed to be lapping up this new avatar of the middle Oberoi scion. All they saw was a sharp, slick business genius who'd been hiding his tack sharp talents behind geeky classes, long hair and cans of paint for years.

She could see beyond that... she could see the drive to destroy himself, the internalized anger and the deliberate starving of the artist inside him. At first, her own anger and frustration at the situation made her feel a little bit vindicated. Then she started to think about just how many people could see and understand what was really going on. She'd been confident that his family would see what he was trying to do to himself and hastily put a stop to it.

But as months passed, there was no change. The Omkara she'd known, the Omkara he'd supposedly been before he met her, both were disappearing rapidly, being consumed by this socially acceptable version of him. The real Omkara was disappearing and being replaced by a construct of all the expectations his family and society had placed on him. He was now everything they wanted and nothing he himself believed in.

It was obvious from the news cycles that although the family seemed to have given up on him, his brothers were still supporting him, but she wondered just how much of this destructive process they saw or realized was happening right in front of their eyes. Their brother was committing hara-kiri in front of them but they either didn't see or couldn't stop him.

The day his Businessman of the Year award was announced was when she knew this had gone on long enough. If they were blind to their brother's self-destructive behavior, she would enlighten them. If not, she would give them weapons against the stubborn Nandi he was being.

That decided, Gauri Kumari Sharma walked into the ceremony, looking like a billion dollars, turning heads everywhere. The year she'd spent alone, away from every support system other than her dreams of Omkara, had given her the requisite confidence to hold her head high against glances, whispers and even outright comments.

She was first found by Shivaay Singh Oberoi who looked like he was going to simultaneously lose his mind and thank god. Rudra didn't have a better reaction either... he didn't know whether to hug her or hurt her for making his brother into this shell of a human being. Knowing there was no fault of hers in his brother's crazy plan for repentance just made it all worse in his mind.

Then Omkara turned and their eyes met. For an entire minute, neither of them said a word. Then his breath left him in a shuddering sigh and he closed his eyes for a second, a solitary tear rolling down his cheek. When he reopened his eyes, she was standing in front of him, closer than before. Before he could say anything, she shook her head asking him to be silent and he nodded in return, accepting her condition.

"Ab humare bolne ki baari hai. Aap bas sunenge. Okay?"

Again, he nodded earnestly.

"For what it is worth, I see what you're doing and I forgive you. But I know you don't need my forgiveness. You think you want it... but you don't. You never have. What you do need is to forgive yourself. Let this go Omkara... You need to let this go. Destroying yourself like this isn't giving anyone anything. Forgiveness is the way forward... I've forgiven myself for the mistakes I've committed and I've forgiven you for your errors. I've forgiven the fact that there was never an US... I need you to do the same. Let this go"

Her slim hand came to rest on his stubbled cheek, relishing the feel of it on her skin after a year, reveling in her right to touch him for those few seconds. Then she smiled a sad, affectionate smile and turned around, walked out of the venue. And he let her go...

Shivaay and Rudra, who were waiting for some drama, either a fight that could lead to some making up later or some making up which could lead to their Dabangg sister coming back home, were beyond astonished at the non-developments. But they sensed a curious lightness in their sibling and decided to let this play out.

That night, after a whole year, Omkara felt restless enough to walk to his studio. The whole night his hands moved restlessly over a piece of canvas, colors and paints mixing and melding to bring to life what he wanted to create. It was early morning by the time he was satisfied with his efforts and took a step back to admire a beautiful pair of eyes smiling back at him from the canvas.

That morning, he was still in his ponytail and suit version, to his brothers' disappointment, but the genuine smile on his face, that had been missing for a year, a lightness in his step and the clarity in his eyes were extremely welcome changes... as were his paint stained fingers.

Shivaay smiled in relief at Rudra... they'd always known that Gauri would be his salvation and it looked like she indeed was. One word from her had sort of returned their brother to them... now all they had to do was bring her back into their lives and things would be perfect.