Both need space ❤️❤️❤️ - Page 6

Originally posted by: tptwi

Your analogy makes SO MUCH sense Nethraa....it is actually quite perfect ⭐️

And you have said what I was trying to find the words to say.... Virat has made many mistakes, but his intentions have always been pure...which is why I am hesitant to call this an emotional relationship because to me that sort of implies intentionality on his part....

When we talk of intentions, there are layers to it.

For example, some people may not have any qualms about having an emotional or sexual affair ....they will justify themselves .....have scant regard for how other's feelings may be hurt by their actions. If we take this as intention, then no - Virat did not intend to have an affair with Pakhi or to cheat his brother.

But let us take a look at his actions. He promised to remain single throughout his life to Pakhi. It is understandable if he still harbours feelings for Pakhi even after her marriage. But harbouring feelings for someone and giving them a commitment are two hugely different things. It implies an emotional relationship...a commitment. Pakhi called him up during her SR and he talked to her. He called Pakhi all the way to GC to explain why he was marrying Sai...he was giving explanations on why there was lipstick mark on his kurta. Imagine the same thing this way...you smell of men's cologne and your male friend acts jealous...you'd shut him up. On the other hand if it was your boyfriend/husband, you'd give an explanation. You see what Virat did there? All I'm saying is that Virat did act on his emotions for Pakhi. He did not actively seek her out for comfort....because even he knew that would be like seeking out a girlfriend/lover. But in other ways, he did cross the boundary in their relationship. And this is the leeway he gave to Pakhi too....the belief that he was emotionally committed her...

So Virat's mistake was not just that he failed to clear the vaada to Pakhi....he is not blameless in his actions either....he did cross the line a number of times.

A sensible person would have found the vaada ethically wrong. He certainly would not have acted on his emotions by giving explanations. He would have completely distanced himself from Pakhi.

I cannot excuse Virat for these. Again I'm not saying that he had any mal-intentions. But he has acted so immature....i don't know what else to say. Samrat and Sai have every right to be hopping mad at him.

There is a huge difference between having residual feelings and acting upon it . Virat never acted in it period . He had many occasions to indulge in EMA if not physical atleast emotional but he chose not to . Few examples are he refused to eat from Pakhi hand when she tried feeding her . If he was attracted to her looks and personality he could have eaten from her hand or could have encouraged to wait for him every night to serve dinner . There are many such scenes where he refused if he was of lose morals he wound he having affair with his SIL while being married to Sai

What I feel the story is written quite well .. you feel for every character…nobody is totally wrong or totally right .. every shade is grey .. and that is real life is .. there are situations when we sympathise with pakhi also .. pity the actress is so bad .. if it was done properly we could have swung from hate to sympathy also ..

I don’t think people fall in love suddenly or completely.. rishto ke bhi roop badalte hai .. naye naye saancho me….😂😂😂..si virat’s attachment for Sai grew to attraction and then love .. simultaneously his attraction for pakhi which had become infatuation grew to friendship and family protection .. however he did not clear it properly with both ladies ..

Today virat n Sai are in love but if they continue this brash behaviour.. virat might shrug off and find some other sympathetic shoulder who he feels understands him more .. Sai has to be careful .. abd it goes the same for virat .. marriage is a constant work in progress ..

Originally posted by: nethraa_99

When we talk of intentions, there are layers to it.

For example, some people may not have any qualms about having an emotional or sexual affair ....they will justify themselves .....have scant regard for how other's feelings may be hurt by their actions. If we take this as intention, then no - Virat did not intend to have an affair with Pakhi or to cheat his brother.

But let us take a look at his actions. He promised to remain single throughout his life to Pakhi. It is understandable if he still harbours feelings for Pakhi even after her marriage. But harbouring feelings for someone and giving them a commitment are two hugely different things. It implies an emotional relationship...a commitment. Pakhi called him up during her SR and he talked to her. He called Pakhi all the way to GC to explain why he was marrying Sai...he was giving explanations on why there was lipstick mark on his kurta. Imagine the same thing this way...you smell of men's cologne and your male friend acts jealous...you'd shut him up. On the other hand if it was your boyfriend/husband, you'd give an explanation. You see what Virat did there? All I'm saying is that Virat did act on his emotions for Pakhi. He did not actively seek her out for comfort....because even he knew that would be like seeking out a girlfriend/lover. But in other ways, he did cross the boundary in their relationship. And this is the leeway he gave to Pakhi too....the belief that he was emotionally committed her...

So Virat's mistake was not just that he failed to clear the vaada to Pakhi....he is not blameless in his actions either....he did cross the line a number of times.

A sensible person would have found the vaada ethically wrong. He certainly would not have acted on his emotions by giving explanations. He would have completely distanced himself from Pakhi.

I cannot excuse Virat for these. Again I'm not saying that he had any mal-intentions. But he has acted so immature....i don't know what else to say. Samrat and Sai have every right to be hopping mad at him.

Yes that is what I want to say

Originally posted by: nethraa_99

When we talk of intentions, there are layers to it.

For example, some people may not have any qualms about having an emotional or sexual affair ....they will justify themselves .....have scant regard for how other's feelings may be hurt by their actions. If we take this as intention, then no - Virat did not intend to have an affair with Pakhi or to cheat his brother.

But let us take a look at his actions. He promised to remain single throughout his life to Pakhi. It is understandable if he still harbours feelings for Pakhi even after her marriage. But harbouring feelings for someone and giving them a commitment are two hugely different things. It implies an emotional relationship...a commitment. Pakhi called him up during her SR and he talked to her. He called Pakhi all the way to GC to explain why he was marrying Sai...he was giving explanations on why there was lipstick mark on his kurta. Imagine the same thing this way...you smell of men's cologne and your male friend acts jealous...you'd shut him up. On the other hand if it was your boyfriend/husband, you'd give an explanation. You see what Virat did there? All I'm saying is that Virat did act on his emotions for Pakhi. He did not actively seek her out for comfort....because even he knew that would be like seeking out a girlfriend/lover. But in other ways, he did cross the boundary in their relationship. And this is the leeway he gave to Pakhi too....the belief that he was emotionally committed her...

So Virat's mistake was not just that he failed to clear the vaada to Pakhi....he is not blameless in his actions either....he did cross the line a number of times.

A sensible person would have found the vaada ethically wrong. He certainly would not have acted on his emotions by giving explanations. He would have completely distanced himself from Pakhi.

I cannot excuse Virat for these. Again I'm not saying that he had any mal-intentions. But he has acted so immature....i don't know what else to say. Samrat and Sai have every right to be hopping mad at him.

He made the vaada to Pakhi in an emotional impulse, not because he rationally intended to remain committed to her his entire life. I agree that this was stupid and immature of him, but acting in the heat of his feelings is just in his nature. In my opinion, his commitment vaada for Pakhi went out the door the day the married Sai. I don't think I've meant to ever deny that he didn't act uncomfortably soft towards Pakhi at the beginning...but my issue comes with people saying that he was intentionally stringing two women along or that this "emotional affair/relationship" was intentional on his part. As I always say, it is extremely difficult for him to look at things from the perspectives of other people and that is the crux of much of this problem from my POV.

Originally posted by: asmi_joya

For me Pakhi always wanted an EMA and Virat in a way led her on for a good duration of time, though unintentionally.. About residual feelings he did have it till she left of to her maayka and he actually saw how Sai is in general.. After this till the handholding kaand , he was negligent or ignorant towards both the women's feeling by wanting them to become friends, lying to them here and there and also not letting know Pakhi in direct words that he does not love her, unlike what was the case when she was getting married to Samrat... He did it only when he saw that hope, that glimpse of happiness in her eyes, when he mentioned in disgust what Sai thinks of their pious friendship..

Going in each other room's late at night , after having had a relationship in the past, even when you are friends now is not the culture that is followed in joint families... and not in general also, there is a basic decency ex-lovers have to follow that both crossed..

The most despicable scene was the one where she steps out from the bathroom and asks him to state, that eye lock and then him realising it and keeping his eyes down... certainly said something about his residual feelings..

He was wrong in assuming that Pakhi has moved on , if he has as well, just by his talk on the ALTA episode or the valentine's day episode. That talk in no way meant he does not have that feeling for her, that talk was more about two people in love moving on with two different people but yet keeping each other in their heart. Because destiny played with them... He also failed to see how Pakhi was more interested in going with him to Ladakh, more than finding a lost son..

Asmi, again, much of what you are saying here goes back to his inability to look at situations from other people's perspectives- be it Sai or Pakhi...he gets engulfed in his own emotions, and his intentions have always been pure, so he has been unable to look past that. This has taken a deep toll on Sai, as this is the exact reason why he has not clarified anything to her- because in his mind, it should be crystal clear and there is no need to do so in the first place. All of these moments that you have mentioned between Virat and Pakhi- I agree were uncomfortable... but, again, I don't think it's fair to say that these were signs of an emotional affair nor relationship, because that implies that Virat was intentionally being disloyal to Sai...and to me, his commitment and dedication to Sai has never waivered.

My problem wirh Virat is everytime Pakhi insulted Sai he kept mum, be it in zillat arena or in their room. But the moment Sai spoke to defend herself and spoke up to Pakhi- he said Pakhi ke liya ek sabbd bhi nahi. What is a person to think when their spouse is willing to defend their bhabhi/ friend even when that said person is wrong. He feels obligated to defend a nonsense person's honour just because her husband is not their.

Pakhi ke izzat, izzat aur Sai ke izzat kutch nahi. 😔

Pakhi has an entire gange and Pakhi herself who I mind you is almost 10 yr older to Sai.

No doubt Virat cares about Sai and now loves her too but he has to open his mouth in front of everyone and one in for all tell Pakhi to stop insulting Sai.

Edit:

Given the recent fight they had It would be nice if both wrote theit feels down on paper and left it on the other side of the bed to read. May be just may ne Sai declaring her love for Virat and the insecurities that is holding her back will give Virat a flips into her mind, and same goes for Virat. Him talking about how he met pakhi and how he never loved that KBA would al least give Sai some much needed clarification. And this could be a new start for them.

Originally posted by: nethraa_99

When we talk of intentions, there are layers to it.

For example, some people may not have any qualms about having an emotional or sexual affair ....they will justify themselves .....have scant regard for how other's feelings may be hurt by their actions. If we take this as intention, then no - Virat did not intend to have an affair with Pakhi or to cheat his brother.

But let us take a look at his actions. He promised to remain single throughout his life to Pakhi. It is understandable if he still harbours feelings for Pakhi even after her marriage. But harbouring feelings for someone and giving them a commitment are two hugely different things. It implies an emotional relationship...a commitment. Pakhi called him up during her SR and he talked to her. He called Pakhi all the way to GC to explain why he was marrying Sai...he was giving explanations on why there was lipstick mark on his kurta. Imagine the same thing this way...you smell of men's cologne and your male friend acts jealous...you'd shut him up. On the other hand if it was your boyfriend/husband, you'd give an explanation. You see what Virat did there? All I'm saying is that Virat did act on his emotions for Pakhi. He did not actively seek her out for comfort....because even he knew that would be like seeking out a girlfriend/lover. But in other ways, he did cross the boundary in their relationship. And this is the leeway he gave to Pakhi too....the belief that he was emotionally committed her...

So Virat's mistake was not just that he failed to clear the vaada to Pakhi....he is not blameless in his actions either....he did cross the line a number of times.

A sensible person would have found the vaada ethically wrong. He certainly would not have acted on his emotions by giving explanations. He would have completely distanced himself from Pakhi.

I cannot excuse Virat for these. Again I'm not saying that he had any mal-intentions. But he has acted so immature....i don't know what else to say. Samrat and Sai have every right to be hopping mad at him.

I agree there, these were things that I could not ignore in any case! Keeping his intentions aside. His intent is true , benevolent and not malign is something that is established here, no one questions that. I dont even question his residual feelings for Pakhi while he was falling for Sai, its human and not intentional.. But then to say that he was not on two boats at that time would be something that I will not agree with...

Originally posted by: nethraa_99

I agree with what you are saying. All in all, I am focusing on intentions and you are focusing on actions. So, yes, Virat did act uncomfortably soft towards Pakhi, and yes that was him crossing the line in one way or another. But, this was not due to malice, but rather because he himself did not see what he was doing as "wrong" since he was too engulfed in his own POV of having pure intentions. This, to me, has to count for at least something, because he has always been loyal to Sai. But, yes, of course I agree that all of this is very immature.

In terms of implying that Virat is a womanizer, that was being implied on this thread, which is why I mentioned it.... I have responded individually to those posts as well...

Originally posted by: asmi_joya

I agree there, these were things that I could not ignore in any case! Keeping his intentions aside. His intent is true , benevolent and not malign is something that is established here, no one questions that. I dont even question his residual feelings for Pakhi while he was falling for Sai, its human and not intentional.. But then to say that he was not on two boats at that time would be something that I will not agree with...

Asmi, his intent is being questioned on this thread yaar.... but anyways, I agree with much of what you and Nethraa are saying.