What are your views on hiding things from loved ones? - Page 5

Originally posted by: Andy3456

Bold : I actually wanted to make a post on this how she got a chance to tell her the truth but stopped because of Chomu's promise. How her promise to Chomu became more important than the Vachans given to Virat, but again there are many fans who actually are fan of Chomu so I refrained

I don't get the logic here. It hurts to see that someone else gets to decide on what a couple should converse! See I know he is spineless but that's fine. But how come it is ok to support the people who troubled your loved ones?

I have relatives who helped my parents when we were in very much need of it and I respect them a lot for that. But that doesn't mean I will let them talk shit about my parents! When I can't even let people TALK like that to my loved ones, knowing that what his love has gone through in that household, how can you be silent about it? This doesn't make sense to me.

Sorry if I have hurt anyone's sentiments but that's my POV!

Originally posted by: asmi_joya

I dont think its just about the promise, its also about her concern for Virat , that he loves his family a lot and would be too hurt to deal with that information. However its also wrong in my view.

Yes, but someday or the other he will get to know the truth na.. so why not now? let him know and support him na. My friends criticize me when I talk like this but it's good to have this kind of discussion here :)

Originally posted by: asmi_joya

Standing at the door screeching at each other, that certainly was not the time for her to let him know oh tu jo kaku aur baba ki bahut izzat karta hai na..wo criminals hain.. And whether we agree or not, whether we do it or not, people do it in real lives to protect the other from hurt/bitterness/truth. 🤔

No no. I agree timing matters. But I really want to understand how people behave with regards to hiding things from spouse and if they are ok with it.

I have seen people doing this and end up being in more trouble

Being married and from past experiences, I would say it depends on a lot of factors. Generally a husband and wife should be pretty open with each other and know everything inside out but sometimes there is some sensitive information which is better to be hidden just to protect your own relationship. Especially when it comes to family matters, such as some family secrets which would be confidential and someone may have trusted you and asked you not to share with anyone.

Originally posted by: Optimist_d

I have not watched the recent episodes since the day Virat is back to CN, unable to stop his sister's wedding. So all my views are completely based on what I have read on the forum or the clips I have watched here and there.

So I was just reading Laksh's post about Virat's behavior. That's when I thought of it. I am completely against hiding things from our loved ones, especially where you think that they will get hurt. It means that we are taking a decision based on an assumption. No matter how well we know a person, sometimes he/she might not react as we expect them to! You know, the person we see is how they presents themselves in front of us, so we can no where decide for anyone else!

Being a teenager, if you hide your relationship from your parents out of fear, that is different. But hiding things because it hurts your loved ones is different. Who is Pulkit to decide that he can't hurt Virat by disclosing the truth to him? How come aai wants to keep Virat in dark? All in all, these two have taken a promise from Sai and despite seeing how this is going, neither of them opened their mouth to tell the truth to him(Yes, UM too!).

So what do you think? Is it ok to hide things from your loved ones or you will share everything to them and support them when needed?

PS: I have already seen many people arguing over Sai hiding it from Virat, so I am not talking about it now. But you are most welcome to share your point of view :) . Let's keep the discussion healthy and I am don't want a Sai vs Virat fight here

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This is again a very debatable topic... it depends on the people you are surrounded by...

I am not discussing ghum in this context because for me I take the show as entertainment and learn from it as what not to do in life 😆

But in reality, there are things that might trigger someone which you want to tell them but cannot to safeguard them....

I have hidden a lot of things from my mom that might hurt her or from my dad which I know he will react to negatively... Not that I am doing anything wrong but it does not mean I unnecessarily give them stress.

I am an open book tbh, I am frank in sharing my opinion and not scared to say the truth... I mean I openly talk about my struggle with depression and mental health, my struggle with harassment, I share everything about my period with my dad even more than my mom, I talk to people openly about my views. But there are times I know an incident or topic can rile them up, so I do not bring it up....

Though I agree that it is better to say the truth than to lie and cover it up with more lies, sometimes you need to re-think the steps you take towards saying the truth. Not everyone might accept what you are saying.

Sometimes a white lie is better than the truth at that moment. A person slowly has to be eased into knowing the facts and the truth especially if you have done something which might cause them to react in a certain manner,

These are just my views!

Originally posted by: Svt611

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This is again a very debatable topic... it depends on the people you are surrounded by...

Yes, I have realized that it's a very debatable topic now and that I am not good at debating

I am not discussing ghum in this context because for me I take the show as entertainment and learn from it as what not to do in life 😆

Oh well I understand, it's just that this question popped out of nowhere from me and I couldn't resist myself from posting it😆

But in reality, there are things that might trigger someone which you want to tell them but cannot to safeguard them....

I have hidden a lot of things from my mom that might hurt her or from my dad which I know he will react to negatively... Not that I am doing anything wrong but it does not mean I unnecessarily give them stress.

You know even I have hidden alot of things from my parents at the same time, I have been so open with regards to some other topics. But I have realized that they were deeply hurt when they got to know the truth. Not because I am wrong but because they deserve to know it. I am so close to my dad but couldn't just discuss anything with him post that incident.. for many ways.. all of us were deeply hurt and at that moment, I did regret for not informing them earlier and make them understand my POV

I am an open book tbh, I am frank in sharing my opinion and not scared to say the truth... I mean I openly talk about my struggle with depression and mental health, my struggle with harassment, I share everything about my period with my dad even more than my mom, I talk to people openly about my views. But there are times I know an incident or topic can rile them up, so I do not bring it up....

It's the same with me🤗 In fact, it's my dad and my brother who understands my pain and mood swings every month. I can discuss anything about them. I think it depends on what we are hiding and if there are any chances for them to know the truth. Now I feel that when we hide things, we should be ready to face the situation and handle them when they get to know the truth.

Having said that, I am not sure how it applies to a married couple though

Though I agree that it is better to say the truth than to lie and cover it up with more lies, sometimes you need to re-think the steps you take towards saying the truth. Not everyone might accept what you are saying.

Yes, maybe it depends on many other external factors too. Their views, ideals, the situation at that time and many more

Sometimes a white lie is better than the truth at that moment. A person slowly has to be eased into knowing the facts and the truth especially if you have done something which might cause them to react in a certain manner,

Yes, just that what if they get to know it from someone else is what troubles me. Again, each of us have different experiences so our views might differ too

These are just my views!

Thank you dear! Opinions like these show me a different perspective to the situation :)

My responses in pink :)

PS: Why do you do this Siya? Whenever I see your post, my eyes automatically search for your signature and I just have to smile😆

Originally posted by: Unique.Sheep

Being married and from past experiences, I would say it depends on a lot of factors. Generally a husband and wife should be pretty open with each other and know everything inside out but sometimes there is some sensitive information which is better to be hidden just to protect your own relationship. Especially when it comes to family matters, such as some family secrets which would be confidential and someone may have trusted you and asked you not to share with anyone.

As I am not yet married, I don't have any points to support my views😆

But like you said, it might as well depend on the situation and the people involved too :)

A matter with me

A matter which involves my husband

A Matter which involves my family

A matter which involves his family

A matter which involves a crime

There are many many parameters on which one can divide the topic, I am taking this approach as of now

1 If it involves me, it is not necessary for me to share with my husband, I am a very private person, I don't think I can be comfortable in a relationship where there's no space for me, I mean I am number 1 in my list of priorities

2 If it involves us, of course I'll share it, there's no two ways about it

3 If it involves my family, I won't share unless he asks, but I don't see the point of hiding it

4 If it involves his family, I don't have any right to keep the information from him, just think how would you react if your husband went against your parents and got your mentally unsound sister married to a guy, you think is a Con man and is already married to someone, I will never forgive him for this (This is Virat's information)

5 If it involves a crime, then you are a pathetic citizen of this nation, you are not reporting a crime to police and helping hide a criminal, which by the way is a crime in India

Sai won't tell him on the door, she had many opportunities, if she can take off with his sister, got her married, stop a police officer from doing his duty, she can surely tell him about the kidnapping, she is literally doing everything else but not doing the only thing which will make it easier for Devi, Virat, Chomu, Sai and criminal gang

It's not that she didn't want to disclose the information because they were on the door (Funny how she is doing faluda of his izzat the next day) so no, that's absolutely not her concern, she was telling him and she stopped because of the promise she gave to Chomu

Important point because Virat did give her a chance to explain after all that has happened he still believed in her but she put Chomu above him, herself and everything which she stands for, you can't be daughter of a policeman then hide information about criminals because your husband will feel bad, What about getting Devi married to Chomu? Did she see Virat dancing on Devi's wedding?

Moreover today, she asked him to find out the truth, I mean she wants him to find out the truth, so she didn't want to hurt him is BS

Originally posted by: NoraSM

A matter with me

A matter which involves my husband

A Matter which involves my family

A matter which involves his family

A matter which involves a crime

There are many many parameters on which one can divide the topic, I am taking this approach as of now

I wish I made this post with so much of clarity but yes, there are many parameters and here I was talking about hiding from spouse about the spouse's family.

1 If it involves me, it is not necessary for me to share with my husband, I am a very private person, I don't think I can be comfortable in a relationship where there's no space for me, I mean I am number 1 in my list of priorities

True and it completely depends on the person. It's also the understanding a couple have, not everyone is ok with this but I agree with you here, respect each other's privacy❤️

2 If it involves us, of course I'll share it, there's no two ways about it

not just a couple, I feel it applies to many other relations as well. For me, I'd be surely hurt even if my best friend hides any such thing from me. Again, just my POV here

3 If it involves my family, I won't share unless he asks, but I don't see the point of hiding it

Yes, if I am comfortable in sharing it, I would share. But if he treats my family as his, I would surely share it with him.

PS: I am not married yet so my views are based on what I feel and not based on my experiences

4 If it involves his family, I don't have any right to keep the information from him, just think how would you react if your husband went against your parents and got your mentally unsound sister married to a guy, you think is a Con man and is already married to someone, I will never forgive him for this (This is Virat's information)

This! This is what I am not able to understand. Even if my brother hides anything from me about my parents, I fight like anything with him. Because it's MY family!

5 If it involves a crime, then you are a pathetic citizen of this nation, you are not reporting a crime to police and helping hide a criminal, which by the way is a crime in India

I completely agree with you here! Especially when you a righteous person, I don't get why we need to hide it

Sai won't tell him on the door, she had many opportunities, if she can take off with his sister, got her married, stop a police officer from doing his duty, she can surely tell him about the kidnapping, she is literally doing everything else but not doing the only thing which will make it easier for Devi, Virat, Chomu, Sai and criminal gang

The only reason I can see is the drama and separation

It's not that she didn't want to disclose the information because they were on the door (Funny how she is doing faluda of his izzat the next day) so no, that's absolutely not her concern, she was telling him and she stopped because of the promise she gave to Chomu

I am not going to watch that episode, so can't comment on this. But this is being dragged unnecessarily However, after reading many opinions on the forum, I think what she did is so she can make sure that the family doesn't do any harm to Tai. and I somehow feel that family deserve it. Keeping everything aside, I can't take it that Virat didn't care for her safety! also, people did bring about what neighbors would say and all in front of Virat and he said that he don't care. I am taking this as just drama for now, takes too much of energy to analyze this😕

Important point because Virat did give her a chance to explain after all that has happened he still believed in her but she put Chomu above him, herself and everything which she stands for, you can't be daughter of a policeman then hide information about criminals because your husband will feel bad, What about getting Devi married to Chomu? Did she see Virat dancing on Devi's wedding?

You know, in this track, I don't see Sai and Virat being in their characters. Sai, who never lies, lied to Virat. Even Virat, I didn't expect him to react in this way. They spoiled it for me :(

Moreover today, she asked him to find out the truth, I mean she wants him to find out the truth, so she didn't want to hurt him is BS

I feel like they are playing ringa ringa roses since this track started

Originally posted by: NoraSM

A matter with me

A matter which involves my husband

A Matter which involves my family

A matter which involves his family

A matter which involves a crime

There are many many parameters on which one can divide the topic, I am taking this approach as of now

1 If it involves me, it is not necessary for me to share with my husband, I am a very private person, I don't think I can be comfortable in a relationship where there's no space for me, I mean I am number 1 in my list of priorities

2 If it involves us, of course I'll share it, there's no two ways about it

3 If it involves my family, I won't share unless he asks, but I don't see the point of hiding it

4 If it involves his family, I don't have any right to keep the information from him, just think how would you react if your husband went against your parents and got your mentally unsound sister married to a guy, you think is a Con man and is already married to someone, I will never forgive him for this (This is Virat's information)

5 If it involves a crime, then you are a pathetic citizen of this nation, you are not reporting a crime to police and helping hide a criminal, which by the way is a crime in India

Sai won't tell him on the door, she had many opportunities, if she can take off with his sister, got her married, stop a police officer from doing his duty, she can surely tell him about the kidnapping, she is literally doing everything else but not doing the only thing which will make it easier for Devi, Virat, Chomu, Sai and criminal gang

It's not that she didn't want to disclose the information because they were on the door (Funny how she is doing faluda of his izzat the next day) so no, that's absolutely not her concern, she was telling him and she stopped because of the promise she gave to Chomu

Important point because Virat did give her a chance to explain after all that has happened he still believed in her but she put Chomu above him, herself and everything which she stands for, you can't be daughter of a policeman then hide information about criminals because your husband will feel bad, What about getting Devi married to Chomu? Did she see Virat dancing on Devi's wedding?

Moreover today, she asked him to find out the truth, I mean she wants him to find out the truth, so she didn't want to hurt him is BS

Thnx a lot for calling it out.like on one hand sai is ready to hide such important information fr virat on the pretext of not hurting him and to keep the promise to pulkit as virat loves his family very much.And very next morning she is ready to create a scene in front of neighbours as if it will give immense happiness to virat.

Strange isn't it