Mirror mirror on the wall, who is the ugliest of them all? - Page 7

Originally posted by: scarlett22

Like Janki said, Virat is basically a good person. His nature is to slide past issues instead of confronting them. And he was too good to be true initially. Yet, he is not putting on an act, at least I don't think so. Having lived in such a toxic family, he must've imbibed some of the toxicity. There must be a conflict within him which has come out only after Sai entered his life. He has to deal with it. Today he was spewing venom literally. I do hope we get some kind of introspection. Not just Sai ko kaise samjhaoon.

BTW, kya samajhaana hai is the question in my mind.

The very fact of his thinking aloud “main Sai ko kaise samjhaoon” putting the onus of understanding his behaviour on her, shows zero introspection. If anything he will regret that he hurt her, but not why he did it. Ergo, next time similar situation = similar behaviour fm Virat. Then sorry, rinse & repeat.

Girls, this is the insidious pattern of abuse.

If he really thought about why he came to behave like that, he wld have said something like “main Sai ko kaise yakeen dilaoon ki aisa phir kabhi nahin hoga”, which wld put the onus of introspection & correction on himself.

Great analysis Janki

I am from a very small town..Where this things are common between husband wife ( mere ristedaron mein bhi kuch aise admi hain who treated their wife like doormat & unfortunately they are highly educated... Isliye humara show ka trp itna high hai

Originally posted by: raji02

i didn’t even have the courage to see the whole episode after watching the last scene today. in yesterday’s post janki, we discussed about how virat can be forgiven for hurting sai because it was not done with the malice to hurt, it got me thinking. the person in his fit of rage who can hurt his wife by holding her hand, will he cross that line and slap her, assault her ? today virat answered my question, that kind of person would stoop to new lows everytime in anger, i would never forgive such a man. but since this is itv, he will beg for forgiveness and sai will forgive him and he will repeat the pattern every time he loses his cool. my heart breaks for the poor soul, no one deserves such kind of treatment from a man she has come to respect and takes pride in associating with.

honestly, no one can answer that until one sees him repenting and if his repentance includes the resolve to never do it again... but anger can really make one go blind.

Originally posted by: jankiraghav

Chinnu dear (I don't know if that's your name), first of all, I just want to send hugs your way 🤗 I can understand your anguish at being caught in a situation like that. At such times, if you are financially dependent on your husband and have no other support system from your own family, it can be difficult and I understand that a mother can never really leave her children. I don't want to comment on the behaviour of your family but I can only say that may be you need to build your relationship with your children if they are still young (I don't know their age). How do you react when your child talks back to you or insults you, as you say? It will sound difficult but if you are reacting in anger and chastising the behaviour, it will only add to the strain on your relationship with your aggressive child. Don't expect your husband or anyone else to do it. I know that sparing the rod is spoiling the child but it is possible that your older child has already developed toxic stress and is venting it out on you because, perhaps, he thinks you are the only one who will understand -- I am talking from complete unawareness of what is the situation you are in or specific instances. But from what you have been regularly writing, I think your older child's behaviour is a result of his awareness and the fact that he has witnessed arguments between his parents and absorbed the tension at home in times of confrontations -- I don't know how often it has been when he was growing up. You will have to do a lot of ignoring over issues that you can let go -- but chastise when he's wrong in values or unjust. It is a difficult road and almost like taking on the task of ensuring that you have to create a man for the world, among the wolves you are surrounded with. But do try.

I am not trying to imply that you are not doing this already, I am sure you are but if you do not have the escape route because of lack of support or financial independence and if walking out is not an option that can be used, then you must only dedicate yourself to winning back your children. It won't be easy but you, with your resolve, can make a lot of difference in the way they will see the world. Of course, children imbibe what they see more than what they hear. And you have my heart if they have a bad example in their father but your love can definitely control the damage to a large extent.

I can only pray for you to have the strength to bear through this until you can walk out -- try to make that your goal, if you can work towards eventually removing yourself and your sons from this environment.

he is saint to everyone except me..for them their father is everything.he knows that and thats why he often asks me to get out his life so that he can do seva to his mother for long jaisaey usko meinaey rok rakaa ho..he knows that if i leave the house ,my kids will definetly choose him. agar mein apnaey saas kaey saath rehthi tho,wohi poora control karaegi,vahi khaana pakayegi,mujaey pasandh ho ya nah i have to eat it..mein apni marji ki khana bhi banakaey kha nahi sakthi.my elder one gets very much influenced by them. meraey aur uski bheech doori already aagayi hey.meri khudh kaey son ko instigate kartaen hein aur mera aur uski beech ka faida utaatgaen hey..my kaisaey meri saas kaey saath rahoongi yaar..

After all this, how will the poor girl trust him to sleep on the same bed as him. He has left her with no option but to leave his room and CN. He literally took away everything given to her as part of the deal out of his great ehsaan.

Though its good he clarified his stand with Pakhi, why do we believe Virat when he said his truth to Pakhi about him not having any feelings?

If so, why does she have so much influence on him? What makes him go back to her again and again.

Will he let Sunny talk about Sai like this with him and listen silently and let him abuse her/ question her character/ rile Virat up?

Originally posted by: sukri

Today's episode didn't deserve your post Janki.

I am just going to paste what I wrote earlier. Its going to be tough to redeem him.

Looks like his intention is mainly to push Sai to the extreme and take away everything that he thinks she needs and he did out of ehsaan so that she has no option but gidgidao at him to help her with home, money, food, to take her back and accept him as one true patidev.

In the moment of rage, even sane persons go crazy and yes, it is a valid point that he is right now in the mode where he wants to establish control, but in his own words, "rubber band bhi jyada kheenchne se toot jaata hai" .. rishtey bhi aise hi hote hain. @bold: that is the word she used at him. It's stuck in his head.

Wonder if he will go for shelter next, and his aai might stop him before he could say anything more. Coz he seems to be willing to fall to the lowest level if that could make her crawl back to him, which seems really stupid.

She is no Pakhi. Sai ka ghamand, guroor and athmasaaman thodna chahta hain, but in this process he fell not only in her eyes, but his mom's and eventually his own eyes.

@bold: That is what he must feel in order to even think of seeking forgiveness for any possible redemption.

She called him Mr. Virat Chavan . No sir, no respect.

Aaj ke baad even if she stays, there should be no Sir. They are equals going forward.

But I think more than addressing him as "Sir" out of respect, it will be to define the boundary of formality. That is, if she takes time to overcome this... I do think it is time that he tells her to stop calling him 'Sir'. How can you fall in love with a man who thinks he has the actual 'Knighthood' conferred upon him just because she calls him 'Sir' 😆

Fantastic post Jankhi 👏

Domestic violence of any kind is abhorrent

Now I understand why Ashwini was the only one to recognize Sai in pain and tell her son you're hurting her, cause it's from experience

Ninad to talk about slapping so calmly like breathing and no one even blink, especially Pakhi who is in love Ashwini son says a lot.

Like father like son, cheap thinking men, who like controlling women instead of treating them like respected equals.

Originally posted by: Saichintalli

No words janaki ji, your analysis is awesome... Frankly speaking virat is one of my favorite characters till date.... Even in the fights happened before in amay and aniket case... I can see his hurt and understood his point of view... Even in his hand holding thing we got the point about his desperation to stop sai from going into danger in his mind.... But today.... It's somebody else in virat's place, the person who preached someone else that taking food is wrong, and wrong is wrong who ever did it is now going against his own preaching, I don't know how he is gone realize his mistake....

I saw only this episode in both the version and I really didn't like the apologize episode because at one moment he denies her to have food and in next scene when he comes to room and sees sai packing , he will say sorry and day after he will defend sai in front of pp and his family... I am like seriously what ever I really wish atleast in Hindi they show a proper scene of realization... Although, after so much drama I really don't know how much I can njoy apology and defending sai episodes 😰😰😰.

But yes this is not our virat...

I agree with you about the apology. Although I have really stopped comparing the versions for my own satisfaction as a viewer, the knowledge of what is coming is obviously there. Like they have taken time to establish the rapport that the two share, it is also necessary to show his regret well and also ensure that his apology has depth and at least some element of removing the misconception between them. That is the only way they can also put an end to their constant fights which arise out of the insecurity that the misconceptions have caused.

Originally posted by: aarsow

Super Jankiji, hats off to u👌

Karishma worst compared to others😡 she is not fit for Mohit too, she has no ryt to talk about others as herself is always wrong.

Regards

Aarthi

Her selfishness knows no bounds. Mischievous character, who will never be anyone's "apni", including her husband so to say.

Originally posted by: AnjuRish

Thanks for the post Janaki

I usually read your post to decide if I must watch the episode or not.

I agree with what KBB says above

There is no way Virat can redeem himself

All this toxic relationship behaviour is one of the reasons I do not watch much of TV

I can't take it ..it just makes me sad upset and we watch for entertainment no point it it makes u sad.

I am not sure if we can say there is no way because spiritually, religiously and legally, one is allowed to repent. Pashchyataap is a very powerful way to cleanse sins but it should be genuine. However, it can only give another chance, it cannot erase what has already been registered on the mind and the heart.