Narratives of Naivety
Shashi Nath Gupta, a man bitter of times gone and the time he lives in, an idol fallen from grace, is a man who believed in no one but himself. His self-righteous being had gained him everything he aspired for- Wealth, respect, honour and status. And it cost him everything else.
Shashi loves his wife, his children and everything that made him. He is fiercely defensive of everything he stands for and every lesson that life taught him. And that is why it angers him when his wife Ratna Malik Gupta fails to do things the way he wants them done. Wives listen to their husbands, that's how it has always been and that's how it should be. He tries his best to teach her the right way to do things but she almost always ends up being a poor student. And today she had gone ahead and invited Piyush's good for nothing friends over for lunch without asking him. Shashi never wanted those uncouth hooligans with earrings jutting out of their ear piercings in his house. His 33 crore gods know it's because of them that his son is getting out of hands. Piyush, his son, whom he had so many plans for, wants to dance to earn his meal. Shashi Nath Gupta's son, whose father has chains of restaurants and bakeries in his name, wants to dance like a girl in front of the world. And to make it worse he is proud of it like each of his performance is a scar from a battle of swords that he won. What is wrong with today's children, he wonders, and neither do they have any respect for their elders nor for their honour. He doesn't even want to think about his other child. He wanted Khushi to have an upbringing of high class family- soft spoken, pleasant and endowed with all good qualities every woman should have. But Khushi has turned out to be someone he can't even understand anymore. He can sometimes declare with conviction that his daughter hates him to the core but he is not so sure the other times. He understands her plight. She blames herself for what happened and in the process blames him too. For a death and numerous losses they have gone through. But she is a child after all, she doesn't understand what is right or what is wrong. What happened was unfortunate but it was the right thing to have happened. The alternative would have been a bigger disaster. He never meant for that woman to die, no matter how much of a she-devil she was. It is never in a mortal's hand to take another's life. But he didn't kill her, did he? His daughter wouldn't understand that and his pride is too dear for him to talk to her when she doesn't want to talk to her own father. She will learn one day. Everyone does eventually and that day she shall know how wrong she was.
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'I've got you under my skin/ I've got you deep in the heart of me/ So deep in my heart that you're really a part of me/ I've got you under my skin I'd tried so not to give in/ I said to myself this affair never will go so well/ But why should I try to resist when baby/ I know so well I've got you under my skin/'
Khushi can't help humming to Sinatra as she folds her cloths in neat piles. Today is just another day with no expectations from time and life, today is just another day she is happy to be among the living. She can't explain the lightness of her heart and the sunny disposition she seemed to have acquired since the past few days. Piyush had thrown a few suspicious glances her way and then gave up, asking her what was wrong? She had given him an uncharacteristic bright smile and said ''Nothing Bhai. Nothing's wrong.'' He had given her a look that screamed the word 'weird' and walked away muttering to himself. She can't wait to start her day and meet Arnav. She enjoys herself when she is with him and she is not afraid to admit that. No shying away or no embarrassment deterred her from grabbing happiness with both her hands when at last she could live it. She is not sure what tomorrow will bring but for today Arnav knows her, really knows her and he hasn't given up already. That's something she could celebrate for a lifetime. She can be the unhappy, bitter, self destructive person who is always hiding under the garb of impeccable clothing and high-standards with him and he would still be there. The feeling of him being there, as cliched as it may sound makes her feel safe. And safe she almost never felt since the air around her started suffocating her and there was no one who could help her when she couldn't breathe.
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"Hey Khushi"
Khushi almost winces as soon as she hears Akash's voice approaching her from behind.
"Hey Akash. How are you?"
"I am good. How have you been? Long time since I last saw you."
"Yes. I have been a bit busy."
"So, classes done for the day?"
"Yeah, I was just heading to the library. I haven't seen Arnav today in the campus. Is he not here? I can't even reach his number."
"Arnav? I guess he is at work."
Akash is surprised at Khushi asking about Arnav, though he is sensible enough to not ask. But Khushi could read his expressions like an open book.
So, Arnav hasn't told him about her and whatever it is between them, yet.
"He is helping me with my thesis. Debbarma sir asked him to."
She doesn't know why she felt the need to justify herself and Arnav in some way. It could be the perplexity at her own emotions when she realised Arnav might not be delighted to be related to her in any way in front of others. In front of his brother, to be more precise. And the messed up relationship she had with Akash, however short, is not helping the matter. She wants to get away from Akash as soon as she can. Embarrassment at being too forward and shame at expecting Arnav to feel as she felt makes her want to hide from the world.
"What is your thesis about Khushi? Arnav did mentio..."
"Akash I gotta go. I actually have to meet sir. Will see you later okay?"
After Khushi's abrupt departure Akash thinks to himself if he said something to offend her. How else can anyone explain the angry red that spread to her ears. He would have shrugged at the thought if it was anyone else but it is Khushi. And he can't help over thinking even something as silly as a 'good morning' when it comes from her.
Edited by luv_panipuri - 7 years ago
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