The Missing Stars - KR OS | HBD KINJAL DI |

One last look at the sky' she promised herself. She lay on the rooftop, with nothing but her night gown on which ended scarcely above her knees. Kririra was discreetly aware that she would not be allowed to wear such clothes in the convent. But this was her place, her little corner away from the world. A little corner, where she could picture all those fantasies which she had been too ashamed to forget, where she could picture all those fairytales which she was too afraid to say yes' to. where she could explore all those dusky corners of her soul which she had always been so afraid to look over. Over all, it was a place, where she could outlive the pain of being everyone else.. but her.

She stared up at the sky. At the stars which chastely dwindled and winked at her. Although she had always, been scared of darkness, she knew that she could never really be scared of the night. Kririra had always pictured her love story, to end and start under the never ending sheet of stars, she had always pictured it to be with someone who loved the stars as much as she did. Who did not bother to call them beautiful or lonely. She found them pampered. Kririra had always been one of the curious groups. She had always loved spending time searching answers for her questions. and after such numerous questions and numerous confused answers, she had finally found out, that she was a nyctophilic. That she was one of such group of people who loved darkness.

She could not deny. She knew she couldn't. she was like that. She wanted her world to collapse around her.

She wanted everything to go as dark as possible.

"I must talk to her! I must talk to her!" A sudden shriek brought her endless thoughts to an end, and her fairytale world back to the trampled one.

She could understand two voices, speaking together, with a haste, one was vaguely familiar while the other one was of Sister Mary. Kririra draped her cardigan around herself before anyone could see her, she rushed down the stairs. Skipping one at a time.

"I must talk to her! I must!" She saw the blond shrieking with impatience.

"Ofcourse I'll speak to you Josy." Kririra said. Sister Mary gave her an impossible look, then releasing the blond, she went away.

"Kria. She told me I couldn't speak to you because you had some-haster-fast" Josyspoke so fast that it was tough for Kria to understand.

"Well yes, I still have eighteen hours before I'm allowed to speak. But anyways, what's wrong?" Kria asked.

"Kria.. I don't know how to say this.." Josy spoke.

Long years of convent had caused a barrier between the two sisters, but Kria could judge Josye nough to understand that something terrible had taken place back at her home. Well, what else could she think after the puffy red eyes and the flaggy red cheeks Josy had come with.

"It's Mamma.." Josy said.

Her tone was fragile and weak, and it had an unknown terror within it. Oh god! Please. Weren't her brother and father enough? Kria thought. She couldn't handle the loss of her mother, no. Chris and Joseph were already dead. And now, Christina was dead too. Kria was unable to understand what dirty tricks life was playing with her and how much more did it have in store for her.

Josy stared at her sister, her eyes puffed with tears, and dark red in color. Her cheeks and nose, were all a dark and brutal shade of crimson.

Although Kririra had been adopted, she was vaguely connected with the whites in her family. With her Asian-brown looks Kria was a stranger in her house and so was she in the society. At twenty-one Kriya looked prettier than most of her sisters, she had a sleek nose, big dark eyes and a sharp jawline which suited her personality.

However, Kria still did not know how to respond, Christina-her mother, had played a huge role in her upbringing, and she was the only one Kria could undoubtedly trust.

"When did it happen?" was all Kria asked.

"Three days ago" Josy replied, her voice broken with grief.

"Are you coming with me?" Josy asked. "I'm here to take you to the funeral"

"Holy Grief! Josy! How am I going to escape the convent?" Tears started to well up in her eyes. Kria looked away from her sister "I don't think I will be able to attend Mamma's funeral"

She murmured more to herself than to Josy.

Her world had come shattering down at her. She did not know how to respond "Christ! Does the convent not permit you out even for a day?"

"No Josy. Not until we have our parents receipt" Kria said.

"But they're dead!". Once Josy had shrieked it out, reality come hitting on Kria, were Joseph and Christina really dead? Would she never see their faces again? Would she never have someone to call mamma or daddy to?

"I didn't mean to startle you" Josy spoke.

"You didn't startle me" Kria said "I just.. don't know how to get out of this place"

Tears rolled down Kria's eyes, she tried to wipe them out but there was no way she could help it. "I really wish I could be with mom during her last days"

"I know" Josy said "But right now, let's focus on how you can be with her, during her last second"

"I don't know Josy" Kriya whispered "Sister Mary is never going to me go"

"Unless you choose to marry" Josy said.

"I.. I cant" Kria said "Don't even consider the idea"

"Look. I'm being serious." Josy spoke "That's what Anna did when she had her wedding"

"But.. It won't be right" Kriya said.

"Do you want to see mamma or not?" Josy asked.

"Ofcourse I want to." Kriya said "But.."

Josy interrupted her "You remember Peter from our neighborhood?"

"Yeah" kriya looked up at her.

"He has a payguest at his house. We're all quite friendly with him. He is too."Josy said "He looks fine, I guess. So if you'd consider the option?"

"I don't care about how he looks. You know what I care about" Kria said.

"I know. But, there's just one problem"

"Yeah?" Kria asked

"He's a Norman" Josy said.

"No Josy. Please. I cannot, cannot do this." Kria said.

There had been a struggling war among Anglo Saxons and Normans, right since early years when her great-great-great-grandfathers had begun this enimity. And all Kria knew was that she could not, she could not marry a Norman, even if it were fake, she couldn't. and how could she? How could she blacken the name of her family? The family which had given her all the love and support in the world, even in the darkest hour, Kria came to one possible answer.

"No"

"Kria" she could hear Josy's voice

"No"

"Kria, look at me" Josy was almost shrieking.

"Don't give me that look. I cannot, you know I can't"

It was long before Kria was fine, but now, she was feeling dizzy, it was an unknown blackness that was surrounding herself, and she couldn't let herself breakaway from this epitome of fear. She could hear her mothers voice, which was slowly draining away, her fathers smile and vaguely visible but it was too, going away, it seemed distant, away. And kria did not know when or how, she felt herself slowly breakfree from all the sounds and voices inside her head.

___________________________________

When she woke up, she could see faces of Sister Mary and Josephine next to her, the white faces terrified her, and much more terrified was the expression on their faces, it was long before, Sister Mary smiled, and slowly caressed her cheek.

"Josephine told me about it" Sister Mary's voice was firm, and diligent.

"Josephine told you about?" Kria asked.

"She told me about your family. Its no wonder that such great grief brings unconsciousness and grim reaper much near" Sister Mary was speaking.

Kria looked at Josy, she had a loss of expression on her face.

"You mean, you know about thy mother and father?" Kria could not help but ask.

"Ofcourse my child, Josephine told me long back about it, and also about.." Sister Mary spoke.

"About?"

"About your Fianc." Sister Mary looked at Josy "She told me about the last wish of thy parents was you to get married, right Josephine?"

"Exactly Sister Mary" Josy added a few fake sobs "I wonder, how she'd get married, now that they're no more, who would oblige us by granting their oral permission. We're just a couple of pitiful little orphans now"

Kria rolled her eyes, she couldn't believe how well Josy could enact, these were the times she wondered why Josy was not an actress in the tribe of drama enactors.

"Don't worry my child, the church shall entertain your grief. I'd get the written permission from the cityonen by tomorrow" Sister Mary said patting Josy's back, her eyes filled with an unknown sympathy.

"Oh no, Sister Mary, You shall not infringe the church's rules for a bunch of lousy orphans like us" Josy said, her voice heavy, eye lids filled with tears, and her face puffy red.

"The church shall understand my dear" Sister Mary spoke

"But, for the sake of formalities you know" Sister Mary spoke, her voice filled with strictness and discipline suddenly "I'd like to meet Kririra's husband. Also, the church would like to know his origin, to see if he's from the same creed as hers, the church would also like to know his family background, which he must, must carry with himself. And also, the convent would like to have his signatures, on the documents."

Sister Mary continued "Only then, will I hand over the wedded certificate to the both"

Kria rolled her eyes again.

"Pardon me Sister, but, he'd be here by day after tomorrow. I believe, thy brother-in-law lives miles away from where we stand." Josy bowed her head down "Would the convent and the church be kind enough to hand over the papers by day after tomorrow?"

Sister's chest filled with pride, as Josy bowed "Certainly" she said "Now, I'd take your leave"

Kria fell back on her pillow "How are you going to bring so many details in a day?"

"Are you insane? You thought I'd come without preparation?" Josy said "I have his details, as well as him with me, right here."

Kria's eyes widened "So why did you ask for time?"

"So, that the old woman doesn't smell something fishy" Josy said.

"You are impeccable" Kria spoke.

"Now, Do you wish to see him?" Josy asked.

Kria thought about it. He. He was a Norman. A ruthless Norman, there wouldn't be any damned thing common between the two, and she didn't want to get her hopes as high as precipice. No. they didn't belong together. She'd get out of convent, break the faade of marriage, and join the church duties. Yes, that'd be right.

The next day was difficult, she had spent her time crying, she had rushed to the ceiling, and didn't come back for rest of the day, Sister Mary had tried contacting her, but Kria had simply shut herself to her room and didn't wish any intrusion. It was understandable.

Kria picked up her hair, then let it fall on her shoulders again. She couldn't keep herself warm, she felt cold and rusted, all funny and exposed, as if someone had led her to the market, without her cardigan. It felt like, she didn't know. But something like helplessness. She felt cold and lost in desperation.

She was going to spent the next twenty four hours with a man she had never seen, nor met. The idea, no matter, how much she denied, was thrilling. But she were afraid, scared. she spent her night thinking about how he might be, and at last, she knew, that he'd be ruthless. Just like the other Normans.

Normans. Normans had killed her family, killed her parents, it had been a destruction for those who thought they'd win over this. she loathed their name.

Normans. The name itself, filled her with an unknown fury, an unknown agony, which burned her insides and left her pale and restless.

Her family. She suddenly was feeling sick, she felt bile rise to her throat. She felt distant and away from these people, just like a moon without stars.

"Kririra" It was Sister Mary "You have your duties at the child depot today"

She murmured a reply, scarcely audible to her own self.

She was magic. She seemed to be made up of air, and pixie dust and angel wings, all the things magical, luminous and graceful.

He knew she wouldn't have anything particularly in common with him, but it was her who drew him to herself like a magnet, whose warmth and gentleness made his insides do a little flip flop with countless unspoken graceful gestures.

For other people, she was just a girl with a different skin tone, a funny accent and kind eyes. But when he looked at her, he knew that his world has gained some magic, he knew exactly what he had seen, and may never find again, she looked mystical kind of soul, an extraordinary human being, for once one had seen her, they couldn't just forget her easily.

He stared at her, the straight back, dark chestnut hair, and brown eyes, with specks of gold, that shone when light fell on them and danced when she looked at you.

He stood there, and wondered, what had he done to find a girl like her?

She laughed, giggled, and smiled with the kids, holding their little hands, their little white hands, covered in her brown ones, she sung them, and he stood there listening, everything about her was magical.

He stared at her from a distance, her sleek body covered in a beige dress, that ended on her ankles, her thick midnight hair, flew as she danced, big bright intelligent eyes, and long lashes, and narrow sleek chin, leading to the ending to her face.

She isn't the kind of girl, one would just eye. He thought. Instead, she was a girl, who'd force you to think about what was running inside her head, what she hid beside her eyes, and what was actually there beneath the faade of her radiant skin.

He stood there, his hands across his chest, towering over the wall that let him peek inside. It was, until the little girl had spotted him. She ran to her, pulled her skirt, and once she bent down in the endless crowd of kids, to listen out to the little one, the girl pointed at him.

Great. He thought. Now, the kids would think that he were child burglar. His face already made him look like the kind of animated movies kids of their ages watch. And then run to their mummy, scared.

Her eyes flicked a moment later, she was looking at him, straight in the eye, he straightened himself, and then, before she could walk out of the crowd of kids, he made his way towards her.

Kria couldn't believe her eyes. The man standing infront of her, with strong masculine features, and deep green eyes, his body built the way drama enactors did. Each one of his hands was the size of her waist. She looked at him for a long time. Studying him.

He looked so.. male. She knew her interest in men had been had never been so intense, but with a man, so handsome and so male. She couldn't just divert away her gaze. She didn't blink, neither did she say anything.

She was afraid, that if she closed her eyes, even for a moment, he'd disappear.

She was afraid, that he might just be one of those characters from Romeo And Juliet. Some fictious character that would vanish in a fraction of moment. Girls my age, shouldn't drool at men this way. She thought.

But no matter, what she thought and what she told herself, the moment she looked down his collar, at the broad and built up chest, she knew he was going to be irresistible.

"What are you thinking?" he asked.

His voice was deep, and promising. She shook her head.

"I'm Reyshaan" He smiled, not like those boyish smirks, or cocky smiles, but an actual which lit up his face when he did so.

"Kririra" she spoke. Her voice was barely a whisper. "I didn't realize you'd be here so early." She looked down at herself, old stained dress. She certainly didn't want to look like a maid to a man who looked like a prince.

He wore an Armani suit, which tightly sticked to his chest. "Its not everyday that you get to marry a beautiful girl, or is it?" he grinned.

She pulled the edges of her lips up, trying to form up a smile. "Do you mind if I take a while to dress up? I didn't know you'd be here so.. early"

He nodded his head "Sure" he said "We still have time before we leave"

"This is my horse" he smiled "Marcel"

But she couldn't hear, she was too occupied with the distant sounds that erupted in her head, she studied the white horse, its feathers sticking to its body, pure white in color. This was vaguely familiar. The horse had dark brown eyes, just like Heather, she thought.

"Would You want a ride sissy? Or are you too afraid to even touch it?" Chris was laughing

"She's my Kria, she can ride it better than you can" Chuck was grinning at her.

"You are too feminine to handle this rugged beauty, sister" Chris was laughing again, along with her father, who stood by the horse, looking at her from a distance.

Chuck looked down at her "You'd ride it, won't you?"

"Ofcourse I would, brother" Kria reassured him.

Chris was laughing at something her father had said.

The memory of his last laugh still echoed in her ears. She felt lost suddenly, all cold and exposed again. Chris won't be there to laugh at her anymore. Her eyes were filled with sudden wetness, and she wanted to scream, she wanted to laugh and cry at the same time

"Would you want to ride it?" He asked, Kria did not look up at him, her mind was caught up with something else, she was in some other world, some other time.

A time which suddenly seemed eons away. And a world which no longer existed.

"Do you want me and Heather to accompany you to the Convent?" Chris was saying "Would you want to ride it?"

Kria laughed "You. Yes. But not that horse please."

Chris looked up at her, his blue eyes, staring at her. "Heather might be the only thing you'd remember about us after years" he had said.

Kria still remembered those blue eyes. Teal blue. As if one was looking deep into the ocean.

"Don't worry, it won't hurt" He was saying.

"We might just fall down. No Josy, we're not going to ride this beast" Kria was speaking.

"Don't worry it won't hurt" Chuck was saying.

.

Tears brimmed in her eyes. "Kri" she felt his hand on her shoulder "are you listening to me?"

She gave a little nod. Her brothers faces beamed infront of her eyes, her ears still boomed with his laughter. "Would you want to ride him?" He asked

Kria couldn't. no. in no way she could. "I.. can't" she spoke. Her voice fragile and weak.

"But we need to travel twelve hundred miles Kri." He was speaking.

Kria closed her eyes, the memories were too painful to recall. "I can't" she said "Would you mind walking?"

"Walking? We'll never be able to cross twelve hundred miles by walking" he spoke.

"Please?" she opened her eyes.

He studied her for a moment, a tear rolled down her cheek, her eyes were sad, deep depths of sorrow and an unknown grief. He looked at her for a moment, then nodded.

"We'll walk" he said.

[continued down]

It was painful, so painful to recall the memories. Chuck would never look at her. Chris would never laugh. Her father would never hug her and say that everything was going to be okay.

And she was never going to be the same. Her family's death had affected her life in more than one ways. She knew the memories would haunt her forever.

"Listen" He was speaking "If anything's disturbing you. You can tell me, okay?"

She nodded.

She had distracted herself, his presence had distracted her from the painful reality, but who was she fooling? She couldn't run away from the truth, you can bury the dead, but you cannot just bury the memory.

The sun was setting, and it was beginning to grow dark, the early winters were sprawling, and she could not help but feel instantly cold at the cool winter breeze which flew. She held her shoulders firmly close to herself, believing that the act would generate a little amount of heat.

But then, she felt something on her shoulder, he had unpinned his coat, and wrapped it around her, she shivered at the brush of his warm fingers on her shoulder. It felt so right. She thought.

She had half expected him to force her to sit at the horse and continue the journey, but he didn't do so, he didn't even bother her by asking questions about what was bothering her. And she owed him for that. She felt so grateful that he did not push her, also for tolerating her extremely bad behavior and terribly small slow steps.

"Listen" she spoke "I know I've been acting like an emotional freak ever since I met you"

He pushed his hands inside his pockets "Its okay. Its been a terrible loss for you" he said "I understand. Everyone would"

Don't just make everything feel so right. She thought. "I.. don't know what to say" she said

"Let me know if anything's troubling you" he said "I know I cannot make it alright, but I could atleast, share"

"I don't want to bother you" she said.

"If that's what you're thinking" he said "then you shouldn't have asked me to walk in the first place, see how much trouble my young weak legs have to handle?"

He grinned.

She smiled "I don't know how to say this"

"Then don't. Don't say it, until you feel like doing so" he said. "Tell me, what do you feel like?"

"I feel terrible" she said,

"What can I do to make you feel better?" he asked

She shrugged her shoulders.

"Do you want to scream? To blurt out everything? Empty your head? Vanish the memoirs?" he asked.

She nodded.

"Then do so. There's no one stopping you, this isn't a convent remember?" He was smiling.

She looked up at him. "Do you feel like sharing now?" he asked.

"My father, an officer in regiment. I had three brothers, all of them tall. Josy was born later, when Chuck had gone to military services"

She looked at him. He was listening.

"And when we were all at home, they sang and played with me and made lots of noise" she said, "I loved being with them, passed from one pair of powerful shoulders to another, as they ran with me and pretended that they were my horses. Chris, Chuck, and John"

Her eyes suddenly seemed to be lit up with happiness and glee. "We were all so happy. My dad. He was an honest man, he wanted me to be honest as well. They loved me dearly"

"Do you remember anything about your mother?" he asked

She nodded "She had a lovely face, she laughed a lot and had her gentle ways of treating us. She smelled of lilac." She said "She used to teach me Ballet sometimes, I loved her"

"When I was little, everyone used to sing me to sleep, and sometimes, my brothers used to tell me stories of warriors and fighters who once existed. We were all so happy" she finished.

"Chris had a white horse, just like you do, his name was heather. He meant the world to Chris, when I joined Convent at sixteen, he came to drop me here" she said "I never wanted to leave my family"

"Your brothers adored you." He said "Trust me, they still would"

"I always saw my family smiling and laughing" she said "Heather died with Chris, that is why.."

She looked away. "When you first saw Marcel, you were reminded of him."

She nodded.

"I'm sorry you had to walk because of me" she said

"I'm sorry you had to cry because of me" he said.

"It isn't your fault." She said "I'm the kind of girl who'd start crying over any possible memory"

"No" he said, looking straight into her eyes "I think you're the kind of girl people read books about."

She looked at him, his dark green orbs, staring at her. His eyes were kind, and caring, but demanded something, the depths of his eyes, there was no Norman-ish thing visible in them, and they were warm and soft.

Nothing like Rashness. She thought.

He's a Norman. She reminded herself.

"Nah, that's definitely not the word here" she spoke.

He was silent, he was looking at the setting sun, the sky had turned orange, with strokes of purple at the edges, he looked like he wanted to say something but Kria was too hesitant to ask. "It's getting dark"

she sat right in front of the fire, the hem of her skirt, next to the blazing wood that burned in front of her eyes. "Your skirt would catch fire" he spoke, his words were clear. Yet they were misty. There was something about him that intrigued Kria, he was brown, like her. He had a similar, very similar accent. And he different, he smelled home
Kria knew what he meant, even if she denied, she knew the truth was that if she slept in her robe, she would be ashes by tomorrow. She was hesitant. She pulled her skirt above her ankles, slowly and timidly, she had never disclosed herself to anyone. She turned back to see if he were looking, but he wasn't looking anymore, his eyes were caught by the stars. He looked vividly at them. His arms covered with nothing but the white shirt, which made it easy to study his structure. "Aren't you cold?" she asked.

"Not very"

She looked at him for a long time, the auburn hair on his forehead glimmered in the yellow light, his face he was different. Different from her brothers, so different from everyone she had met in her life. she never felt this before, a strange physical pull towards someone.

He made her forget about the heartbreaking reality, he made her forget about everything wrong that went on with her. He calmed the voices in her head. And silenced the demons which lived within her thoughts.

He was the only one who made her forget about the sky.

It was within moments, when he turned his eyes back on her. He could not help but look into her eyes. The specks of gold in her dark brown eyes, shone when light fell on them. They radiated their own light.

"You have beautiful eyes" he said, mesmerized for a moment.

She looked away, down to her legs "They're just.. different" she said

She noticed him shrugging his shoulders "Different is beautiful" he said.

"They catch attention, I mean, it's just the sprinkle of gold that everyone notices" she said "attention is sometimes annoying"

"No" he started "I don't know, I mean, in your eyes, I see something more radiant than the moon"

Kria looked at him. He was so mystical, a different kind of human. He made those little noises in her heart clear, he made her think about all those fairytales which she was too scared to say yes to. he made her want to explore all those dusty corners of her soul which were left unseen. He made her want to voice out all those unnamed desires which she had been too hesitant and too ashamed to talk about.

He was a constellation of stars in his own ways. He helped her outlive the pain of being everyone else than her.

And it scared her.

"Are you cold?" she asked again

He was warming his hands "A little" he spoke.

"From not very to a little. Well, that's a bit of progress" she smiled then unpinning his coat she said "Here, wrap it around yourself"

"Aren't you cold?" he asked.

"It doesn't matter. I'd manage" she said

"Ofcourse you would. You'd manage so well that I'd find ice glued around you in the morning" he rolled his eyes.

"Are you mocking me?" she asked

"Happy realization" he fake smiled.

"Why do you care anyways?" she placed her hands on her hips.

"I care because you care" he retorted.

"Fine. Keep your blazer to yourself then" she said, her hands crossed across her chest.

He didn't say anything else, it was a while later, when she heard him say "Come closer"

"What?" was her instant reaction.

"Since you forgot your cardigan, lean closer" he said

"What are you doing? Trying to get that blazer torn apart?" she asked

"I'm trying to keep you warm" he spoke.

She leant an inch closer to him, and one more, and then, when she finally did gather the courage to get even closer, she moved an inch apart "Here now, cover your arms" he instructed.

She was crashing into his muscled chest, but it seemed like that was the least of his bothers, he wrapped one end of the blazer around her shoulder, and the other across his. The blazer couldn't do much, but she was no more the close, the intimacy made her forget about the winds, his body radiated warmth, and she could not help but notice the distance between the two.

Another breeze passed by, and he scrunched closer. he swore, he murmured and thought, that an inch closer and he'd hold her in his arms and never let her go. For heavens sake, he was no saint, how was he supposed to maintain his posture and his distance from the girl who sat so possessively close to him. he knew that Kria wasn't exactly sensuous, but behind her retro clothes, he couldn't help but notice the skin which looked so creamy and delicious. No, she wasn't exactly sensuous, she was tempting. Sensuous in her own little ways, welcoming In her own unspoken gestures. And even if he tried, he couldn't help but ignore her, and even if he did try to ignore her pleasant smile and welcoming gestures, how was he supposed to avoid her eyes? The eyes which demanded love and attention, the eyes which could get even a two year old jealous, the eyes which screamed for affection.

Once one had seen her, they couldn't just forget her easily. Her beauty couldn't go unnoticed, nor could her everlasting affectionate glances towards everything go unacknowledged. She was turning into a beautiful shade crimson, he placed his arm on her shoulder and couldn't believe how nervous she seemed by the littlelest tender act.

"No dowry, eh Kri?" he hushed for her ears alone.

Kria's heart thudded. His hot breath danced over her ear, she could feel his nose slightly in contact with her side of her cheek. She clutched the fabric of her skirt as much as she could.

"Be calm" he spoke.

Kria lifted her timid eyes, her nervous glances caught his passionate ones. He looked straight into her eyes, the brown orbs with specks of gold

"No dowry" he spoke again "But there's gold here for any man."

Kria's heart beat ran faster, she had never felt this before, the urgency, the sudden desire which slowly crept within herself. Being this close to him, she could notice the little sprinkle of freckle on his nose. She then, noticed the littlest, and the most boyish smirk which crept on his lips.

Kria didn't reply, she couldn't. she simply rested her head on his shoulder and took off for dreams.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Kriya pulled his hand closer, she was almost awake, but she wanted to fell asleep, she wanted to enjoy leaning into his broad frame while he was looking at her. She had enjoyed being so close to him. she had enjoyed eyeing his tanned skin, and his well built body.

If this was a dream, she didn't want to wake up yet. She wanted to savor it for some more time. She had liked his company last night, she liked spending time with him. she liked the way, he ran his hands through his dark brown hair, she liked the way he stargazed in absolute darkness, she liked the way he looked at her as though she were the only girl in the world.

She had liked it as though he was a dream and she was a dreamer.

She shot her eyes open, his coat lay partially over her, and him. his leg was comfortably positioned close to hers, his arm was circled around her waist. And he was holding her possessively, her front crashing into his muscled chest, and his face centimeters away from her, his hot breath caressing her skin ever so gently. It almost seemed as an ecstasy, a wonder, an unknown pleasure. She had never realized when she lied down, she had never realized when she got so intimately close to him. She observed the little lines on his face, the little smile wrinkles, a little scratch on the top of his forehead and the scar on his neck. She ran her hands through his delightedly musky male features, caressing every little detail. His perfectly shaped nose, the hint of beard on his chin, the scar on his neck, she wondered where he got it from and how painful it must have been for him.

She tiptoed her fingers up to his forehead and then down to his neck. That was, until a little hint of smile crossed his lips, she felt his hands moving up her back, she could intimate touch even with the fabric of her dress, "I didn't notice that you were awake?"

"Could we keep pretending for a little time more then?" his voice was a bare hush.

Kria didn't know a way of answering that, she didn't know how to reject a man who was more than welcoming. She inhaled some air.

Exhale. She reminded herself. "We're running out of time" she said "we must get going"

He shot his eyes open, and pulled his hands back, for a fraction of second, Kria almost regretted making the realization. He shot up to his legs, so did she. "We must get going" she said, her voice low.

"Yeah we must" he scratched his eyebrow.

She needed to get out of this mess she'd created, she needed to get away from this man who was suddenly looking at her with passion in his eyes. "I'd just wrap up the things"

Silly. Silly excuse. she thought, there was nothing to be wrapped up.

She aimlessly rearranged the pile of papers, the marriage documents which stated her as his wife. Wedded to Reyshaan. She looked at the words, he was supposed to be hers, entirely hers. She suddenly wondered how making love to him would be. She shook her head in negotiation, she must get these thoughts down her head.

"You'd might want to get freshened up?" she heard him asking. He was in tight light blue pants and was getting his black jersey over his head. She looked at him, so simple yet so classic. She thought, he was the kind of man who could look outrageous even in the casual and the most simple things in the world, which meant that he might as well look better without anything on,

She mentally slapped herself. She had to get these thoughts out of her head. He's a Norman. She thought.

"I don't really have much to wear" she said. "I mean, the convent would send back my robes in some days."

He was silent for a moment then said "We might as well get going then"

The moment he turned back, she snapped "I'm hungry"

For food. Not for him. She mentally cleared it to herself.

"Good, that's good. So am I. we'd find you something, on our way?"

She nodded.

_________________________________________________________________________

The more he looked at her, the more he realized how beautiful she really was. Her beauty was divine, and so was her nature, the way she looked at things, the way she reacted at things, the way she reacted to him. Everything inside him screamed that he loved her. He wanted her, needed her.

"Look Kri, I'm sorry about the morning, I wasn't really being myself" he said.

"Just forget about it okay?" she asked

He nodded. "You want to talk about it?"

"I don't want to talk about anything" she said

He helped her up the Marcel, and began the journey, she had cleared it that she didn't need to talk, and he was a man with pride and ego and he wasn't going to lower his pride for anyone, may it be her.

It was about dark when he stopped the horse, jumped down, helped her down and while looking straight into her eyes, he asked "You've been crying since morning" he said.

"Look I'm sorry for-" she interrupted

"Shh" he kept a finger on her lips. "if I were at your place I would've gone through the same feelings. The thing is, you have to make yourself forget the past for a while Kria, you need to stop thinking about what's gone and need to see what's left"

She was looking at him with avid eyes, as though taking everything in.

"You don't die with who's gone. I agree that you change, what once mattered to you now seemed trivial, but you need to let it go. At least for a while. Give yourself a break Kri" he spoke.

He loosened the finger over her lips and let it fall back. "I'm really sorry about what happened with you, I understand you and I can totally understand what you must be going through"

She was still looking at him. "If you want to fall apart, I'm right here. I'm all ears." He said.

"Are you done speaking?" she asked.

"I didn't mean to-" he was interrupted

"Just listen" she said.

He nodded.

"I've been crying because you make me forget about what's happened with me. You take me to another world, another time. Away from these miseries." She said.

"Staying with you makes me happy, and I feel guilty for even feeling a spark of happiness inside me. I want to throw my head back in my pillow and cry for what I've lost and cry for not realizing what I've lost. You might not realize but I'm such an escapist, who doesn't want to live in this world. I don't want to exist anymore. I want to escape this pain, this happiness. I want to outlive the agony of feeling sorrow and happiness at the same time" she said

"I want to be with you, but at the same time, I'm in some other world, some other time. You. You make me forget that there are problems in this world. You. You make me want to live like that of a princess from fairytales" she said "And it hurts, when I realize that I can't have one"

He smiled then linked his forehead to hers "Every girl deserves her fairytale" he said

"You look Exhausted Kria, Would you want some rest?" he asked

"No" she shook her head.

"Afraid that I'll see you sleeping with your mouth open?" he said "Well to let you know, I've already seen that"

She grinned "I don't sleep with my mouth open"

"Yeah sure, you watch yourself, while sleeping" he rolled his eyes.

"Stop mocking me" she hit his stomach

"Its fun you know" he said "Its fun teasing you"

"Yeah right, you're standing so close just to make fun of me" she blurted out, and as when she realized what she had said, her cheeks warmed up.

He held her shoulders, firmly enough for her to notice "I know I'm expected to do something else" he said "But I don't want to touch you"

I'm too ragged for you to touch. She thought.

"You look so pure, so fragile, I'm almost scared that I might blacken you" he said. "I know that might make me less of intense and romantic in your eyes but.."

She looked up at him. "That doesn't make you less of a man"

He nodded. "You're more than what a man would desire for"

"You yourself are not that bad" she said, a whim of a smile on her face.

"You need a better timing for your sarcasm you know"

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Two weeks later, Kria lay in the large house which belonged to her parents. She could not get enough of this dreaded silence, the dreaded peace, the epitome of silence in which she found herself felling into. She was slowly going down, and down, as though she were falling down from a huge precipice.

There was a time when this same house had always been filled with glory and laughter, joy and love. Just enduring love.

That was a time and this is a time.

She closed her eyes, she expected to see the memories floating inside her head, the sad ones, but instead the happy ones had found their way at last. She remembered the way he looked at her, the way he smiled at her, the kindness in his eyes, and the affection in his actions, let alone the promise in his voice. She remembered the way he had looked at her when she had first cried looking at Marcel, the way he held her hand, and the way he could thrill her by just looking at her in the eye.

He never left her alone, he made sure he was always with her, right next to her.

That was a time and this is a time.

A time when she is surrounded in loneliness and void of blackness, an emptiness inside her, that didn't seem to leave her alone. A wholeness inside her, that didn't let her heart at rest. she felt incomplete, she felt bruised, she felt as though there was no one but her in the world. She felt like a moon without stars.

His memories haunted her, she still remembered the way he had looked at her when she was about to leave, and it replayed in her head, over and over again.

He brought his horse to a rest. then helping her down, he looked away "This is it. Here we come to the end of this journey," he continued "out journey"

"We mustn't meet again" she had said, her hand still in his, he felt so warm and cozy.

"I know" he said

He took the pile of papers down the horse and handed them to her, "I want you to keep them" he said.

"I can't" she replied "If someone sees them, its going to be a problem"

It really was going to be a problem, the papers would remind her how happy she was with him and how happy she wanted to be, with him. the papers would remind of his aura, of his smile, of his presence. Everything that she had to let go at once.

"I can't keep them either" he said

He couldn't keep it, because everytime he'd see them, it'd be a harsh reminder of how much he wanted this woman in his life. how much he hated to leave her alone, and how much he wanted to make her his.

It was going to be a reminder of what he could've in life and what he didn't have at all.

"I'm really going to miss you" she said "And this stubbornness"

He smiled "And I'm going to miss you too, and your dead sarcasm"

She gave a soft laugh. "But as I said, let go what's gone and remember to focus on what's ahead"

He kissed her forehead "Go home before someone sees you with me"

But she wasn't listening anymore, she was looking into his eyes, his eyes were pleading her to stay, pleading her to give them a chance. The soft smile on his lips, reminded her of the times they had spent together. And just like that, she ran back to her home.

What was home? She found herself asking. Home was a cool place with no warmness and no love. Home was made up of cement and bricks with no spice of emotions added. Home was dark valleys with family pictures who no more existed. Home was tears and pain. Home was this agonizing pain which was throbbing inside her chest. Home was memories and sad time.

She clenched the sheets tighter, fighting back tears. She had thought that the departure was going to be easy, but it was everything but that.

Memories. Memories were destroying her, memories burned a flame inside her which was slowly leaving her dead, burning till it finished everything inside her, everything. Her heart and soul.

Kriya lay there, thinking, everything in her life was coming to an end. This pain, too, would end.

________________________________________________________________________________

He threw the glass, and it came crashing down in pieces. This was what his life was without her now, shattered. She had left him pale and weekend, drenched in memories and haunted by sadness. It terrified him. left him with an unknown pain inside him and an unknown fury.

Fury for letting her go, fury for not realizing how much he needed her in his life.

Rey did think that it was going to be easy to forget her, and that his heavy heart was normal after such an emotional departure. But fate and time had proved him wrong, so wrong. She was him. she was his destiny. She was where his heart was, and where he wanted to be.

She had the power to make him realize what a fool he had been to let her go, and how badly his life demanded her back. He was fool to not let her know, that he felt so, so empty without her, so lost and so sorrowful without her. He needed her. Damn. His life needed her. She were something his life dwelled upon.

He shot up to his feet. Jumped down his window, his head felt heavy and every inch of him felt dizzy and weak, he crossed her fence, walked to her house and ran her bell.

Josephine opened the door "You? What on earth are you doing here?" she asked

"Your sister." His view was blurred, and his head felt heavy "I must, must see your sister. Talk to her"

"You'd better come inside" Josy said.

Rey walked in the mansion, his heavy, every inch of his body aching.

"Second door to the right." Josy said.

Rey walked through the dark hall, in sheer silence, he saw the abundance of doors, so many, it was almost like a palace. And Kria was the princess.

There was a pulse acting on his body, nervousness filling him from top to bottom, he swiped the sweat off his forehead. Nervous was an understatement, Rey was bewildered, he had missed her everyday and every second for the past two weeks, 'he had talked to her a million times in his head, told her that he loved her, told her how much he needed her. But right now, infront of her, he didn't know if he could speak, he was tongue tied.

He knocked her door "Get in Josy" he heard.

Her soft voice, almost like warm music, playing in his ears. He unlatched the door, and walked in her door, she was sitting by the window, stargazing.

The moments spent with her replayed in his mind, the way she looked at things, her umpteen graceful unknown gestures, the way her big eyes widened, the way she pursed her lips in a tight smile, the way she fluttered her lashes at him.

She was sniffing, crying. Sitting by herself and weeping. "You've not been taking care of yourself Kri" he said.

Kria shot her head towards him, seeing him now, here, was a painful reminder of all that they've been through together. All those times she had found herself getting lost in the depths of his eyes. All those times he had touched her, caressed her skin, let her know how special she was.

"No, I think you're the kind of girl people read books about" his words played continuous tracks her mind.

Seeing him now, she was reminded of what all she could have had, and all that she had missed in life, all those times she had felt that physical urge towards him, the times she wanted him to hold her, the times he made her forget about the tears and made her laugh, the way he made her forget about the heartbreaking reality, and make it seem so unknown.

"You" she said "You-You've not been there.. to take care of me"

"But now I'm back. No more tears, no more cries." He said "I ain't going nowhere love"

He walked towards her, in slow steps, as though walking an aisle. His arms circled around her waist, and he pulled her closer while their eyes were in collision.

"I've missed you" she said, she could see the beard which had grown up on his chin, "Dinner? You had dinner?"

He shook his head. "Did you have anything at all since the evening?"

He shook his head. "Lunch?" she asked.

He shook his head again. In negotiation. "You'd have to join me for the dinner"

"I'd love to" he said "But I'd like to do something else first"

His something else thrilled her to another level. His hand went up to her chin and lifted it up, their gazes clashed and Kria's heart thudded so fast that she was unable to breathe.

"This.. isn't right" she said

"How do you know? We haven't done it yet" he chuckled.

"No it isn't" he leaned in towards her face,

The moment his lips met hers, she let out a slow moan, clutching the piece of fabric on his collar even harder, his hands moved up at her face, each thumb pressed slightly against the edges of her neck, supporting her face. His lips synchronized with hers, and she felt that a moment more and she'd melt in his arms, her knees wobbled and she held his shoulders for support, he let her go, slowly.

Just a few more minutes, she said to herself, and then she'd ask him to leave, and never meet him again, he was a norman and that's what she was supposed to do. She couldn't bond with a norman.

"Marry me Kria" he said, catching on his breath.

"Huh?" she said

"Marry me, I want you, all of you, each and every day. I want to fight with you, irritate you, drive you crazy and love you more and more each day. I love you Kria. Please? Please Marry me?"

"I can't Rey" she said

"Why?" he said with an unknown urgency "Let me tell you this Kria, I'm not a Norman, I'm not even an Anglo Saxon, I'm from Asia, I've been here to study this culture. Please Kria?"

"Rey-" she began

"Kria, let me just say it" he said, urgency gripping his veins "I'm from our land, our time, our world. I'm from where we belong where we're meant to be. No kria, this community battle, this is not us. We should be where we belong to. the browns. This is not our time, not our world Kria"

"Rey-" she started off

"Before you make a decision, I'd want to say, that I've missed you more than anything in this world and I couldn't live without you. I can't imagine a life without you back in India, miles away from you" he said "I'm seeing things the way you would Kria, I'm thinking the way you would, I'm looking at things with different eyes, I'm wishing to gaze the stars but with your hand in mine, please Kria? Don't do this to me-"

"Reyshaan! I can't marry you because I'm already married to you" she blurted out smiling "And I always want to, stay yours. And yours forever."

He pulled her in his arms, close and tight, wishing to get as close as he possibly could. Wishing to spend an eternity of time, with her, like this, forever.