Aziyat...Sujal&Kashish FF...Last Part...10/06 - Page 57

Two weeks had gone by...Sujal was silently sat in the lounge in the evening with a mug of coffee..after returning from the office and freshening up..he picked up the newspaper from the table to read it when something fell on the floor..he looked on the floor placing his mug down and lifted it to see an invitation card..he looked at it curiously when Daima came to ask him about dinner...but he was busy concentrating on opening the invitation card...

Sujal: daima yeh kaun dene aaya tha...

Daima: woh Royal Palm Resort se uska manager deke gaya hai..

Sujal: Royal palm...

He takes out the invitation card from the envelope...placing the envelope down as he opens the card...reading the invitation...it was for a party to celebrate the opening of the new resort...that they worked in partnership..when his eyes fell on the names displayed as..'Mr and Mrs Garewal'...as soon as he read Mrs Garewal...an image of Kashish appeared in his mind...he stood staring at it for moments to come...and then saw below that it mentioned it was a party for all couples...within a moment...he became frustrated...and anger took over him...he held on tightly to the invitation card...and just threw it across the room...as he left for his room in anger...not knowing why her image kept propping up in his mind...when he wanted to forget her...Daima saw him leave and then went and picked up the invitation card...she read it and realised why he reacted the way he did...Daima: tum chahe maano ya na maano beta...tumhare dil me Kashish ke liye bohat pyar hai...tumhe kab is baat ka ehsaas hoga beta..kahin dair na hojaye..

Back into Sujal's Bedroom where he was sitting on the edge of the bed thinking about Maahi...

Sujal: kya ho raha hai yeh mere saath...maine aaj tak kabhi Kashish ko is nazar se dekha bhi nahi to aaj kyun muje yeh laga ki woh meri patni hai...kyun Kashish hi...Maahi kyun nahi..

He sat there still in frustration...his hands gripping the edge of the bed as he lifted his hand...running it through his hair..he couldn't understand what was happening 2 him..the more he thought about it...the worse he felt...like there was an emptiness in his life...he held his head between his palms...trying to think straight...but it seems he didn't have an answer for anything...

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Another two weeks had gone by slowly...for Kashish...each moment without Sujal felt like a decade...yet she tried to forget about the past and move on...she made a fresh start by joining the office again..trying to divert her mind...it was a typical morning in the office...and Kashish was sat in her cabin..preparing for interviews to recruit a new staff supervisor...one by one the candidates came in and hand their interview...the 7th candidate was invited...as he stood up...heading to her cabin..knocking on the door

Kashish: ple come in...

The door opens slowly and in walks a young man...dressed smartly in a suit..with a smile on his face..he walked inside stood infront of her desk...

Man: goodmorning ma'am...i'm Suraj...Suraj Malhotra..

Kashish: Su...Sujal...

Suraj: nahin ma'am...Sujal nahin..Suraj...

Kashish: oh..I am..I am really sorry...please sit..

Suraj: it's ok ma'am..no problem...and thanks...

He settles down as she asks him to..waitin for her...his hands folded together as he waited for her patiently...Kashish was just observing him...his name...the way he presented himself...all reminded her of Sujal

Kashish: so are you sure ki...tum sab manage kar loge..

Suraj: ofcourse ma'am..i think i am a perfect candidate for this job..i have 3 years of experience in supervising...an international degree...aur meri last job me meri wajah se staff me bohat zyada changes dekhne ko milli thi...i know how to keep them on track

Kashish: very impressive...well i know ki yaha pe tumhe koi taklef nahi hogi...waise I like your confidence...you can join tommorow..

Suraj: really...ohh i am so happy..thankyou ma'am...thanks a lot...i really appreciate this...

When there was another knock on the door..

Kashish: come in

It was the worker...bringing in some tea for Kashish...as he placed it infront of her...when Kashish looked up at Suraj...

Kashish: will you join me with tea?

Suraj: i'm sorry ma'am..i don't drink tea...i only hav coffee.,with one spoon of sugar and some milk...

Kashish: ju..just like Sujal..

Suraj: Sujal?..ma'am..if you don't mind...can you tell me who Sujal is?...this is the second time you mentioned that name...

Kashish: i am..I am sorry...its my...my husband's name...

He just smiles at her.

Suraj: ohh...your husband..lagta hai aap apne husband se bohat pyar karti hain..tabhi har baat me woh aapko yaad arahe hain...

Kashish: main office me apni personal life ke bare me discuss nahi karti..

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A week later...we reach the calm beaches of mauritius on an evening...where the waves could be heard..crashing against the edge..a cool breeze spread in the atmosphere...a perfect moment to relax...we see a black mercedes park up on the side as it came to a halt...the door opened and Sujal stepped out...he seemed lost...his face expressionless...he was lonely and felt as though life was no longer worthy of living...he walked steadily onto the beach...lost deep in his thoughts...dragging his feet as he kicked the sand with each step he took...when he reached closer to the edge...his eyes spotted Mr India...sat there on the beach...still in his shell...Sujal just looked at him for a moment...and walked upto him...with each step he took...memories of the past came rushing back to him...memories of Kashish...her smile...her laughter...the way she was...it all seemed to take over his mind...he knelt beside Mr India as he stood there staring at him...fisting some sand in frustration as he tried to wipe out her thoughts in his mind...

Sujal: Mr.India...kitna ajeeb lag raha hai na...aaj Kashish ..kashish saath nahi rahi to mujse muh hi mod liya...kya tumne mujse bhi dosti nahi ki...ya tu bhi tere dost ki tarah muje chod ke chala gaya...

Mr India dug his head into his shell..turning away from Sujal...as though he was aware of the pain that Kashish had gone through..she was emotionally attached to him...and spent hours crying...as she poured her heart out infront of him...yet today...Sujal was in a similar position...Sujal looked down at Mr India...placing his palm on his shell...as the wind flew through his hair...his eyes showing his pain

Sujal: tum..tum to jante honge na...woh mujse bhi jyada tumse apne dil ki baat karti thi...main janta hoon ki woh sabse pehle tumhe hi bataya hoga ki woh mujse...mujse pyaar karti thi...lekin tumne...tumne kabhi kuch kaha kyun nahi...main bhi na...tum kya bolte...kyun ki tum bhi to bejuban ho...aur jisko bolna chahiye usne kabhi kuch kaha nahi...main use itni takleef de raha hoon lekin woh kyun kuch bolti nahi...kya use dard nahi hota...kya woh insaan nahi...kya hai woh...kya hai woh main aaj tak samaj hi nahi pa raha...

Mr India slowly pulls his head out from his shell..turning towards Sujal as he lifted his head up...Sujal looked at him as he placed his head on his shell...just like Kashish would do whenever she cried for Sujal...he closed his eyes laying there still...when memories of the night they became one came flashing back to him...making him open his eyes...

Sujal: us pal main kamzor ho gaya lekin maine kabhi socha bhi nahi tha ki Kashish tum...tum bhi is tarah kamzor pad sakti ho...kyun nahi roka tumne muje...kyun hone diya sab kuch hamare beech me jab tum yeh janti thi ki is rishte ka koi aadhar hi nahi...kyun tumne woh hone diya jo mumkin hi nahi tha...

He was frustrated..angry...because she didn't stop him..if she stopped him that night..then things would have been the same..yet he was confused...if he made a mistake that night..why did he miss Kashish...why did he want her back...why could he only think of her...

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Another 2 weeks had gone by in the same way...life was going by..with every moment full of pain...and yearning..for both Sujal and Kashish..on one side Sujal was confused and on the other side..Kashish was missing Sujal terribly...it was a typicsl evening..Kashish was silently sat in her bedroom...thinking of the previous events in their life...and how life had changed again..yet the pain she suffered in her life was still eating her up...she looked at the time as she came out of her thoughts...and picked up her mobile..dialling Sujal's house to speak to Daima..knowing Sujal would probably be at the office...back at Mauritius..Sujal had returned home early that day..he wasn't feeling well..and had a bad headache..due to which he came home early..when the phone started ringing..Sujal heard the phone and got out of bed as he headed to answer it..he was about to say hello when on the opposite end he heard Daima say hello..he was about to disconnect..yet a voice stopped him in his tracks..as he stood rooted to the spot..not moving...it was Kashish...

Kashish: hello Daima...kaise hai aap..

Daima: Kashish beta..tum...main theek hoon beta..tum kaisi ho?

Kashish: main..main bhi to thik hi hoon na Daima..

Daima: muje pata hai ke tum kitni theek ho..mujse bhi jhoot bologi..apni Daima se..kya main nahin jaanti ke tum is waqt kis dard se guzar rahi ho

Kashish: to aap bhi aise sawaal kyun karti hai jab aap to janti hai ki Kashish kaise khush ho sakti hai jab ki woh khud Sujal ke dard ki waje ho..

Daima: kis mitti ki banni ho tum Kashish...aaj bhi Sujal ki galti chupa kar tum khud ko kasoor waar maan rahi ho...kyun Kashish..jab ke tum yeh jaanti ho ke jo kuch bhi hua..usme tumhari koi galti nahin thi..kyun Kashish..aisa kyun kar rahi ho tum khud ke saath...kya tumhare paas dil nahin hai...kya tumhare koi jazbaat nahin Kashish...kyun humesha sab tumse pehle aate hain

Kashish: sabka pata nahi Daima...lekin haa mere liye sabse pehle Sujal hi hai aur hamesha woh rahega...kya karoon khud ko bahot koshish karti hoon use nafrat karne ki lekin her bar uske khayal se nafrat pyaar me badal jati hai...

Sujal held on tightly to the phone receiver as he heard those words...he could feel her pain through her words...his own heart in pain too...he didn't know why he felt relieved hearing that she still loved him..he knew she would never forget him..but just hearing those words reassured him..

Daima: tum usse kabhi nafrat kar hi nahin sakti beta...kyunki tumhare dil me Sujal ke liye dhair saara pyar hai..jab tumhara pyar tab kam nahin hua jab Sujal ki shaadi Maahi se ho chuki to ab kaise hosakta hai...lekin Sujal hi badnaseeb hai jo tumhare pyar ko usne thukra diya...

Kashish: nahi Daima...agar woh badnaseeb hota to hum dono behen ko ek hi insaan se pyaar nahi hota...us insaan me woh kuch khass baat hai jiski waje se main aur Maahi durr hoke bhi bahot pass hai uske...yeh pyaar na kabhi badal sakta hai na badlega...lekin Daima woh kaisa hai...woh apna khayal to rakhta hai na..

Daima: kya Sujal kabhi bhi khud ka khayal rakh paaya hai Kashish jo woh ab rakhega..pehle usse main sambhalti thi..phir woh Maahi ke sahare jee raha tha..aur jab tum uski zindagi me aayi to tumne usse phirse jeena sikhaya..lekin ab woh phirse akela pad gaya hai..binna kissi sahare ke woh ji raha hai..na waqt se khata hai..na sota hai..aaj bhi sir dard ki wajah se woh jaldi ghar agaya hai..

Kashish: Daima...use ek black coffee ke saath ek pain killer ki pill de dijiye...pain killer uske washroom ke drawer me hai...aur black coffee main aaj sugar bilkul bhi add mat karna...aur please aaj aap sone se pehle use sulake jana kyunki woh warna files ko leke aadhi raat tak betha rahega..

He stood there listening silently..his eyes turned wet..as he thought of how much she cared about him..even after all that happened...she still remembered every little thing about him..

Daima: hmmm...agar itni fikr horahi hai tumhe uski to laut kyun nahin aati tum uski zindagi me..woh tumhare binna bohat akela hai..kabhi kahega nahin par main jaanti hoon uske dil ki baat...

Kashish: agar baat mere dil ki hoti to main use hazaro dard deke bhi aa jati lekin mere aane se Sujal ko dard hoga jo main nahi chahti...shayad ab alag rehne me hi hamari khushi hai...lekin Daima kya woh muje yaad bhi karta hai ki muje...muje bhul gaya...

Daima: kabhi kehta nahin lekin..muje pata hai ke woh tumhe bohat yaad karta hai..woh bohat chup chup sa rehne lagga hai jabse tum chali gayi..apne hi khayalon me khoya rehta hai jaise ke kissi gehri soch me ho..pata nahin tum dono is tarah se kyun ji rahe ho..jab ke tum dono ek doosre ke binna nahin rehsakte..par na tum apni zidd chod rahi ho aur na hi Sujal...

Kashish: jis aapka beta zidd chod dega tab aap ki bahu aapke pass chali aayegi...

Daima: najaane aisa kabhi hoga bhi ke nahin..tum jaanti ho na..Sujal kabhi bhi apne jazbaat bayaan nahin kar paata..bas ab yahin dua hai ke sab kuch tum dono ke beech theek hojaye...aur Sujal tumhari ehmiyat ko samaj paaye..par tum to apna khayal rakh rahi ho na beta?

Kashish: jis din Sujal apna khyal rakhne lagega us din Kashish bhi khayal rakhna sikh jayegi ...khair chodiye na yeh sab...aap bataiye kya aap muje milne nahi aa sakti...muje aapki bahot yaad aati hai...

Daima: kaash ke yeh mumkin hota beta..par tumhe to pata haina mere ghutnon ke dard ki wajah se doctor ne muje zyada safar karne se manna kiya hai...tum..tum kyun nahin aajathi yahan pe..kuch dinon ke liye..main issi tarah tumse mil bhi lungi...

Sujal was getting hopeful..for some strange reason he wanted to hear a yes from her at that moment of time..

Kashish: main dekhti hoon lekin yaha pe bhi office main bahot kaam hai...kal subaah bhi muje Pune ke liye nikalna hai...waha pe ek naya project chal raha hai to...

Daima: beta kya tum kuch waqt ke liye chutti lekar nahin asakti..har waqt kaam karna bhi nahin acha hota..insaan ko kuch waqt apne liye bhi nikalna chahiye..

Kashish: thik hai yeh project khatam hote hi main aaungi...ab aap bhi apna khyal rakhe aur Sujal ke liye black coffee bana de...

Daima: mein banadungi beta..aur mujhe phone karke apna haal batati rehna..aur haan mein tumhara intezaar karungi..apna khayal rakhna beta..rakhti hoon..

Daima cuts the call whilst Sujal places the receiver down too..he heads back into his room as he settles down lost in deep thoughts..her voice running through his mind...her words eating him up..he felt so guilty..so wrong...he regretted all that happened..and wished she would return to his life again..he lay back in bed..resting his head against the bed post..the pain in his head increasing due to the constant thoughts of Kashish..not leaving him..

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Two weeks later..it was 7pm in the evening..Sujal returned from office and headed upto his room..when he stopped outside Kashish's room..he looked towards the door..as he stood there silently for moments...and then turned towards the door..opening the door as he walked inside her room..he stood silently..as he closed the door behind him..looking around..being able to feel her presence..he looked around the place..past memories coming back to him..when he saw the door to her closet was half opened...he walked towards it and was about to close it when he stopped..seeing something sparkly..he opened the closet and saw that it was a pair of clothes...he opened it wider..and saw different outfits..that she wore at special occasions..he ran his fingers through them as he looked at them...when he stopped holding onto one of the pairs..lost in thoughts of the past...

Sujal: yeh...yeh to wahi saree hai jo Kashish ne hamari shaadi pe pehni thi...

He stopped as he stared at it..thinking about there wedding...when he remembered everything that happened between them..all the moments and all the time he was harsh to her after they got married...when he remembered how she always wanted his shirt to be ironed..and how he had refused her that time..he felt so guilty..for behaving in such a manner..it wasn't her fault..that all that happened..yet he always blamed her...

Sujal: Main..main kaise Kashish ki baat nahi man sakta..sirf woh to yeh chahti thi ki meri personality kharab na ho...aur maine to uspe hi gussa kar diya...

He cursed himself for taking out his anger on her..how harsh were his words..they must have hurt her so much..yet she never said a word...he left from there..walking out of the room as he closed the door to her closet..walking inside his room he headed to his closet as he opened it..he looked for the shirt through his closet..pushing away all the others..when finally he found the shirt he wore that day...he pulled it out and looked at it for a moment..remembering that day..those words haunting him..when he picked up the iron from the shelve and took it to the ironing board..he placed the shirt on the board and started to iron it..taking out the creases...ironing over it again and again...

Sujal: I am...I am sorry Kashish...muje tumhare saath aise pesh nahi aana chahiye tha...ple forgive me...

He was angry with himself..he should have never behaved in this manner..she didn't deserve any of it..after all she did for him..he treated her in a bad way..and he regretted each and everything he said to her..each word that must have stung her like a bee was coming back to him..giving him pain...as he looked up whilst ironing..his anger clearly visible..his one hand holding on tightly to the ironing board..Daima who was about to call him for dinner just stood watching him at the door..she could see his pain...when he accidentally touched his finger with the iron..jerking in pain...

Sujal: ahhh...

When Daima walked in worriedly..as he blew at his finger..

Daima: kya kar raha hai...aur tu yeh iron kyun kar raha hai jab ke tuje aati hi nahi..

Sujal: Daima..meri shirt kharab hai..uski iron karne ki zaroorat hai..warna yeh mujpe buri dikhegi..meri personality pe bura asar padega aue yeh Kash-...

When he stops half way and realises what he was about to say..he didn't know what overcame him at that point...he felt as though he was loosing his mind..and all he could think of was Kashish...

Daima: sab samajti hoon main...waise tumne sir dard ke liye medicine li ki woh bhi muje deni padegi...

Sujal: woh..abhi tak nahin...main baad me lelunga..pehle main isse iron karlun..phir main leta hoon..

Daima: tumse kuch nahi hoga..tum betho main deti hoon...

Sujal: daima..pehle mera yeh karna zyada zaroori hai..main baad me lelunga..

He looks down and stars to iron the shirt again..

Daima: agar aaj Kashish yaha hoti to tumhe yeh sab na karna padta...tum use...use wapas kyun nahi le aate...kab tak use dard dete rahoge...kya tum use maff nahi kar sakte...

Sujal looks up at Daima and stops ironing...he places it on the side..still gripping onto it..

Sujal: main uska saamna kaise karun Daima..jo dard..jo takleef usse aaj tak milti aayi hai..woh sab meri wajah se hi to thi...aur main usse maaf kardun..kya woh muje maaf kar paayegi Daima?..galti to mujse huyi hai...woh muje kabhi bhi maaf nahin kar paayegi...aur main uska saamna nahin karsakta..bohat galath kiya hai maine uske saath..mein uska saamna nahin karsakta daima..

Daima: ek bar baat karke to dekho...woh tumse naraz nahi hai...woh to aaj bhi tumhara intzaar kar rahi hogi..

Sujal: jaanta hoon...ke woh aaj bhi mera..aur usse aaj bhi meri utni hi parwah hai..tabhi to usne aapse kaha ke aap muje mere sarr dard ke liye medicines dena mat bhoolen...main jaanta hoon ke woh aaj bhi meri parwah karti hai..jab ke usse mujse nafrat karni chahiye..woh kyun mujse nafrat nahin karti Daima..kyun muje dard horaha hai..yeh soch kar ke maine uske saath itna galat kiya..phir bhi usne kuch nahin kaha...woh sehti rahi sab kuch..maine jo kaha...kiya..uske liye woh muje maaf karti rahi..aur main..usse samaj hi nahin paaya..maine bahot galath kiya uske saath...uski zindagi barbaad kardi

Daima: agar tumne hamari baatein sun hi li to phir tumne Kashish se kuch baatein kyun nahi ki...

Sujal: meri himmat nahin huyi...main usse kya kehta Daima..aap hi bataiye..aapne to uski baatein sunni na..uski har ek baat mere dil ko chot pohancha rahi thi..itna sab kuch hone ke baad bhi..woh mujse utna hi pyar karti hai..maine jo kiya woh galat kiya..phir bhi woh mera intezaar kar rahi hai..aap hi bataiye..kya kehta main usse..

Daima: main jyada kuch nahi kahungi sirf itna hi kahungi ki pati patni ka mamla jitna jald sulaj jaye utna hi achcha hota hai..

He looks up at Daima as she takes out the tablets..placing them beside him with a glass of water..and then places her hand on his shoulder before leaving the room...as Sujal watched her go..lost in her words..when he looked at the tablets beside him..reminding him of Kashish's words..he picked it up taking a tablet as he swallowed it with water..he placed the glass down as he sat there lost in his thoughts..staring down at his shirt ..