OS, Our First time -My first time too.

BrunoMars thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Dazzler Thumbnail + 2
Posted: 13 years ago
#1

Our First Time

Please! Read this first!

OKejj, so first,, thanx to my friends really love you guyss! Not that I don't love the people who aren't my friends, but can't name you so srry for that. Second, I know it's bad but I already told that I wrote something and I hate it people say something and end up doing nothing at all. So I updated it. Please don't be to harsh, my heart breaks fast. But all types of comments are welcome. Negative/Positive... So please leave a comment. Third my english is not that well, so yeah there will be a lot of errors. Fourth, please this is not to offend someone, so if you don't like it, srry. Fifth, I know it's a lot, just love counting, okejj yeah, if this looks a lot like the work of someone else... Srry but can't help it, there are so many stories here, I don't which are already written and which not. So please tell me if it looks a lot like something else. Sixth, the sond is called, "Our first time - Ofcourse by Bruno Mars, I love that guy so much! Seventh, no just kidding please read and comment...

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Ohw no! Her favorite song! Her own radio in her head started to play. And that too now! Is Virat thinking of the song too at the moment? It could be. It totally goes with the moment' And making him listen to this song everyday would definitely help him with remembering this song.

Yes, he heard the song to at the moment. Maanvi made him listen to this all day that sometimes his mind started playing it. And it wouldn't get out of his head, whether he liked it or not. It most of the time it was every annoying. But now, it was all he wanted to hear. It made the moment even more special. He had to smile when he thought that she would be thinking about the same song right now.

Don't it feel good babe?
Don't it feel good baby?

Yes, it does, it feels way too good! This should have been uncomfortable, uneasy'
But it's totally the opposites of it. It felt so nice. Seeing the most handsome man staring at you like your're the ,most precious thing on earth, like he will do anything for you. But there was a little bit mischievousness in his eyes. She could see it clearly, she didn't need a lot of light, the moonlight and candles made it clear enough.

Cause, it's so brand new babe
It's so brand new baby.

It definitely is new! She thought, she could relate to this song very well. She dreamed about having a romantic moment with her Chep on this, wait her Chep?! Yes, so what. He's my Chep, right? We are married now. Exactly 2 hours. So he is mine(!) Yep, she still had to get used to see her Chep like this' Everything changed so fast!
Who would have thought that she and Chep, I mean Virat would marry each other? That too love! The Vadhera's love to plan everything
precisely, and they planned the honeymoon directly after the wedding. Virat insisted that there would be no driver, he was afraid it would affect their romance. On the way to the airport their car broke down, obliviously! It's Chep's!


And now now here we are (here we are)
In this big old empty room Staring at each other, who's gonna make the first move?

They were stuck in the middle of nowhere, and their mobiles had no network' But there was a small house, without anyone living in it. So they invited themselves. It was raining, Maanvi loved the rain but the way Virat stared at her, made her feel self-conscious, so she stopped with dancing. Though she was already drenched. Luckily Virat had some extra clothes which she could wear. Sadly for her, it was a long kurta with too big pants. She had no belt so she had to do it without pants. Virat was busy with the fireplace. His wet hair came in his eyes. He moved his head to remove it. But his eyes were fixed on the beautiful women, the other side of the room. Her hips were visible though it was hidden in the kurta. And her legs! She hadn't wear the pants. He looked at her from her toes to her face' his mouth hang open. She looked so beautiful and the thought of her being his made him smirk. She was trying not to look into his eyes. She knew she would forget about the world when she drowned in them. She knew that he would definitely make her look, make her forget about the world. She should do something, make the first move before something happened. But she just couldn't' she wanted him to make the first move, she wanted to forget the world by drowning in his eyes, she wanted something to happen. Virat's case was totally different' He couldn't think straight. As always with her near him. And this revealing kurta made him insane. He started walking towards her. But she didn't notice, her facial expressions changed by second. She was totally lost in her thoughts, like always, that's one of the many things he loves about her. He smiled and shook his head. The mysterious wind came and made her hair fly in the air. It came in her face. And blocked Virat's sight. He grabbed her waist and pulled her towards him. She didn't expect this and surprised she looked up' her eyes were locked, with his ' the glance of want, attraction, love, everything. It overwhelmed her. And made her fall in love all over again. This happened daily. Every time she looked into his eyes, she did not only forgot about the world, but saw her whole own world in it. And she was lost 'again- Yep, it was too late he already made the first move.

Been doing our thing for a minute
And now both our hearts are in it
The only place to go, is all the way (ah, whoo)

Yep, there they stood, their hawa hawa look look. While Maanvi looked in Virat's eyes, he pulled her closer in a rush. This made her come back to earth, since it felt like she was somewhere in Mars... She started blinking again. She was shocked she felt his heartbeat, it was too fast. She broke the staring session by that. Slowly her hand moved to his heart to check whether it was normal or not. Virat toke her other hand and placed it on his shoulder. Maanvi melted by this. His muscular body had always made her feel like, like, she didn't know right now. She couldn't think straight too. His warm breath on her face was intoxicating. When he had placed her hand on his shoulder he moved her hair from her face so he could see her eyes. The reaction of Maanvi surprised him. Pleasantly. Though it made him more restless to touch her. Touching her face made his heart go faster -if that's possible-. But the gentle hand Maanvi had placed on his heart made it calm down a bit.

Is that alright?
Is that okay?
Girl, you don't need to be nervous
Cause, I, got, you, all, night
Don't you worry about a thing babe (no no no)

He was lost yes, but he was very slow. He didn't want her to feel uncomfortable or get nervous. But the way she didn't move away from him or made up an excuse to let her go' made him think whether it wasn't the other way around...
He bent forward, he didn't call her Dedfutiya for nothing. She was so small and fragile. It made his do everything slow and careful. Like she was a dream and he could wake up any second if he did something too fast. Maanvi automatically shifted her hands. One moved from his shoulder to his back a little. And the other one moved to his neck. Her hand caused him shivering. And him shivering made her shiver. Virat moved his hands, on her waist and her back. He stood still at the thought that she fitted perfect in his arms, like she was specially made for him, 'she is made for me' he corrected himself.

Just go with it, go with it, go with it (and I will go real)
Slow with it, slow with it
It's our first time
Go with it, go with it, go with it (and I will go real)
Slow with it, slow with it
It's our first time

Maanvi was getting nervous now. She was waiting for him' but there was no action at all! Chep! Yeh duffer mila hai mujhe? Yeh toh teekh se kiss bhi nahi karta. Itna slow hone ki kya zaroorat? Her Maanvish behavior made her forget her shyness. Maanvi thodi blush karti? Who bhi Chep keliye. Chalo yeh bhi yaad rakhe ga? She made her hand ran though his hair, which was soft. She stood on her toes, and closed her eyes. Then her lips crashed on his. Virat was shocked and stiffened for a moment. There he was wondering whether Maanvi would do this or not. But how could he forget. She is not a cute cat or something, she was a Sherni. His sherni. She couldn't be left behind. But she was faster than he thought though. He embraced her even more tight 'if that's possible-, cause after all he is Virat Singh Vadhera, he can't stay back either and kissed her back with equally affection, passion and love.

Clothes are not required, for what we got planned
Ooo girl you're my desire, your wish is my command

Virat would smirk if he could but Maanvi wasn't letting him break the kiss. He thought he was prepared, he thought he knew her by now. But the surprise she gave him' made him think otherwise. Not that it bothered him. It was a relief, he hoped she wouldn't be slow but he didn't expected her to be that fast. Maanvi was lost in the kiss. She didn't let him take pauses either' She already placed her hands on his shirt. And started unbuttoning them' Definitely too fast, Virat thought. He didn't stop her it felt so nice, heaven. Though he grabbed her hands, before she would start unbuttoning something else, without breaking the kiss. Virat was walking backwards, while Maanvi walked forward.
Treat you like a princess, oooh girl you're so delicious
Like ice cream on a summar day, gonna eat you before you melt away (babe)

They fell on the carpet, that's when they broke the kiss. Maanvi who hadn't been breathing during the kiss, gasped. So did Virat. But hearing her gasp turned him on so badly' Maanvi was back to earth now and was shocked about what she just did. What will Virat think of her. But when he grabbed her by her waist again and she saw his evil smirk she knew that he wasn't thinking like she thought he would. Virat wasn't a good boy, no he was the bad one with a soft side. For her.

Is that alright?
Is that okay?
Girl, you don't need to be nervous (no no no, no oooh)
Cause, I (I've), got (got), you (you), all, night
Don't you worry bout a thing (no no no)

Virat was on top now, but Maanvi had nothing to complain. She felt so safe in his arms. His gentle touch, which was becoming less gentle now'Slowly nibbling on his lower lip. He removed his shirt, now she felt his warm, no, hawt body on her. Virat broke the kiss and kissed her chin, her eyes, her nose. Maanvi placed small kisses in his neck. She moved her hands to his sixpack and he almost lost his senses, no he lost his senses. How does she do that? She can make him do things noboby can make him do'

Just go with it, go with it, go with it (and I will go real)
Slow with it, slow with it
It's our first time
Go with it, go with it, go with it (and I will go real)
Slow with it, slow with it
It's our first time

Slowly Virat unbuttoned the 'actually his- kurta Maanvi was wearing.

We can go slow (we can go slow), we can go fast (we can go fast)
All you gotta do is ask me girl, ask me girl
The candles are burnin', our bodies are yearnin'
I can't wait tonight, I'm so ready babe
I'm so ready baby

Virat started humming, 'just go with it, go with it, go with it', Maanvi laughed and shyly moved her head the other way.

Just go with it, go with it, go with it
And I will go real slow with it, slow with it
It's our first time
Go with it, go with it, go with it
And I will go real slow with it, slow with it
It's my first time with you

'What?'Virat asked cool, 'I thought you never blushed'' And Maanvi hugged him, thanking god for giving her, her Chep Husband.

Baby, and I wanna make it right for you
It's our first time




Oooh oooh baaby!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Menika.

I''m not very happy with the end, so maybe I will edit it later...

*Other work

Just The Way You Are (OS-complete)
Locked Out Of heaven (OS-complete)
Taming of the Sherni(SS/FF-ongoing)
Edited by BrunoMars - 12 years ago

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Veronica1504 thumbnail
17th Anniversary Thumbnail Navigator Thumbnail + 2
Posted: 13 years ago
#2
reserved

----
First, the ending is perfect, so dont change it!
Your OS is brilliant, and to think this was your first one.
You write very well, so please continue writing!
I loved how Maanvi got impatient and made the first move, but then was shocked at her actions later.
It was beautiful. Hot, yet not vulgar. I think thats why I loved this OS. Thank you for sharing it with us.

Thanks for the pm! And please PM me if/when you write more!
Edited by Veronica1504 - 13 years ago
BadtameezDil. thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail + 2
Posted: 13 years ago
#3
OMG!! I just can't believe!!
This was ur first time!!
That's incredible...totally awsem
That was just perfect
It felt that u have been writing frm ages
Totally awsem
Try to cont and pm me
Thanks fr the pm
Keep writing👏
Edited by __Shivani__ - 13 years ago
virmanloveraish thumbnail
Engager Level 1 Thumbnail Explorer Thumbnail Networker 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago
#4
AWESOME!
you're an amazing writer and you should be thankfull,
you're absolutly amazing. Please comtinue or write something else/more. and pm me when you do
BrunoMars thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Dazzler Thumbnail + 2
Posted: 13 years ago
#5

Originally posted by: __Shivani__

OMG!! I just can't believe!!

This was ur first time!!
That's incredible...totally awsem
That was just perfect
It felt that u have been writing frm ages
Totally awsem
Try to cont and pm me
Thanks fr the pm
Keep writing👏

Thank you!
That's so sweet of you!
Ahw, that's really sweet.
I will definitely try, but
I don't have a lot time and
I don't want to make promises I
can't fulfill so that's why I chose
to do an OS. But I willl definitely
try and if I do so I will PM you!
Edited by BrunoMars - 13 years ago
ananyakai thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail + 4
Posted: 13 years ago
#6
really is dis ur first time doesnt look it it was d best awesum n beautifully written plzz om me seriously loved it u shud write more often
BrunoMars thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Dazzler Thumbnail + 2
Posted: 13 years ago
#7

Originally posted by: virmanloveraish

AWESOME!

you're an amazing writer and you should be thankfull,
you're absolutly amazing. Please comtinue or write something else/more. and pm me when you do

I already told you made my day right!?
I just read the updated part of 'I love you'
and I was just like WOW!
And here you are leaving an awesome
comment on my OS. I am so happy!
Edited by BrunoMars - 13 years ago
BrunoMars thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Dazzler Thumbnail + 2
Posted: 13 years ago
#8

Originally posted by: viratmanvi

really is dis ur first time doesnt look it it was d best awesum n beautifully written plzz om me seriously loved it u shud write more often

Thank YOU!
I will try to write more.
That's really very sweet of you!
Edited by BrunoMars - 13 years ago
Let-It-Go thumbnail
16th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail + 4
Posted: 13 years ago
#9
I am glad that i was in ur pm list coz i seriously , after reading it , didnt wish to miss this . It seriously didnt seem like ur first time .. U are so good .
I love ths song myself , so could easily replay in my head while reading ur stuff n it looked so amazin .
The see-throu kurtas , Poor virat . On the contrary i was trying to imagine This kurta on.virat .. Lol ..Back to ur OS.
I loved Manvi getting impatient , a needed break from cute cats . I was anticipating Manvi to take first move and u wrote it beautifully .
The ending is perfect ..
U kept the essence and at the same time made it Hawwt , in a good way .
Loved it ..Do pen something more

Ruchi
mnss123 thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Voyager Thumbnail Engager Level 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 13 years ago
#10
i love it!! i could feel the chemistry...and i liked the fact that maanvi made the first move...do continue writing...its really good 😛

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