Rudhita FS : jealousy chapter 5B updated on page 27 - Page 9

Originally posted by: Alexia_Wilson

Viva yaad matt dila behen 🤣

Ok my suggestions and criticism { Jo samajhna hai samajh le}

First and foremost please do not use RC mainsion behen tu FF likh rahi hai text message nahi

For a person using initials is fine to limit it should also not go over board

But RC mansion please dont use it

And yeh kya hai? batuk, bondita?

Never I say never use lowercase while writing a name

Always capitalize it

Agar kaka likha hai then its okay kyunki naam nahi hai woh

Grammer thodi better ho sakti hai teri but pehla ff hai toh its okay

And please keep this in mind that jab bhi you are using double quotes then it should only be for someone's speech and not for anything else

Double quotes sirf speech ke liye while single quotes for other things

And jab you write a dialogue toh write told by Anirudh, spoken by, asked by

Khaali dialogue matt daal

There are somethings which sometimes I also do not follow but if you want to know then

Never should God be written as god. Every noun and pronoun used for God should be capitalized

When starting a dialogue please do use capital letters for the first word's first letter

Baaki the plotline is good but developing hai so you could improve the build up lines

Transition from dialogue to monologue thoda sa imrpove ho sakta hai

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Itna hi hai mujhe kehna

The story is awesom you are creative

Pardon me if I sound rude

Mere samay kahan hoti ho Didi aap???

Dude

I

JUST

WANT

SOME

SUGGESTIONS

FROM

ALEXIA JENNIFER WILSON

Seriously - such things help a lot !!!

This is just amazing - it’s not under everybody’s capacity to point out others for their benefit.🥰🥰

Originally posted by: aaradhaya1688

Loved the update

Finally ani realizes that bondita is jealous

Bechara batuk fas gaya

Thank you dear🤗

bechara Batuk became bali ka bakra😆

Originally posted by: softy

Wonderful story

Continue ........

Thank you dear🤗

Originally posted by: bhshre95

Thank you so much Al for your review🤗 trust me it wasn't rude at all more analytical i feel😳

@ bold- i am really sorry about that, it was more of my laziness speaking, i just write sometimes in notes in mobile and become too lazy to rectify these things😆

@ blue - thank you so much for clarifying these things. I was really confused about these, especially using those double and single quotes. About writing khali dialogue, is it ok to use told by, said by etc everytime. I did think of doing it but thought it may become too repetitive as my story has lot of dialogues. So little confused here. Please clarify regarding this

@pink - will definitely improve on this behen. I am struggling a little as its my first story😆 sometimes after i post it, i read and feel arre ise ese nahi likhna chahiye tha🤔 especially that transition from dialogue to monologue i also felt its not so smooth, it has become abrupt many times😒 particularly in this third part i felt the backstory just jumped from here to there just like that😳😆 i will try to improve it in next update

Thank you once again 🤗 for taking time and giving your opinion Al👍🏼 it will be really helpful for writing next time

So the solution for this is dont just use said by or told by keep changing

Eg: " I am not at fault." Justin said. " The who did it?" She asked. " I dont know but it wasnt me." He replied

And if you want it to be more unique then

Eg: " I am not at fault. " Justin said fearing her reaction. "Then who did it ?" She asked angrily. "I dont know but it wasnt me." He said with determination.

Try showing the emotions of the character while writing the dialogue.

Originally posted by: nancy56

Mere samay kahan hoti ho Didi aap???

Dude

I

JUST

WANT

SOME

SUGGESTIONS

FROM

ALEXIA JENNIFER WILSON

Seriously - such things help a lot !!!

This is just amazing - it’s not under everybody’s capacity to point out others for their benefit.🥰🥰

I give suggestions to anyone who asks for it🤣

Tu ne kabhi pucha hi nahi

I stopped giving suggestions the time people regarded me to be unnecessarily rude😆

So whenever anyone asks for it I give the warning and still they want it then I give it

Even with Shaheen its like that

Tujhe chaiye toh I can do that for you as well

Originally posted by: nancy56

Mere samay kahan hoti ho Didi aap???

Dude

I

JUST

WANT

SOME

SUGGESTIONS

FROM

ALEXIA JENNIFER WILSON

Seriously - such things help a lot !!!

This is just amazing - it’s not under everybody’s capacity to point out others for their benefit.🥰🥰

PS: Tere se didi sunna is so weird🤣

PPS: If you wanted to write whole name then it was Alexandria Jennifer Wilson🤣

Originally posted by: Alexia_Wilson

PS: Tere se didi sunna is so weird🤣

PPS: If you wanted to write whole name then it was Alexandria Jennifer Wilson🤣

@bold: I barely speak Hindi in here , guess what dear and didi are not mile apart , are they ?

Alexandria - oh me god- FINE

I JUST WANT SUGGESTIONS FROM ALEXANDRIA JENNIFER WILSON

if that would do ?

You didn’t talk the deal , ( huffs, and goes in a Conner )

Originally posted by: Alexia_Wilson

I give suggestions to anyone who asks for it🤣

Tu ne kabhi pucha hi nahi

I stopped giving suggestions the time people regarded me to be unnecessarily rude😆

So whenever anyone asks for it I give the warning and still they want it then I give it

Even with Shaheen its like that

Tujhe chaiye toh I can do that for you as well

OkYa dear !!! Now I shall definitely ask after every update

Originally posted by: Alexia_Wilson

About this na everyone has a confusion and honestly it does feel repetitive but stand alone dialogues are also a big NO

So the solution for this is dont just use said by or told by keep changing

Eg: " I am not at fault." Justin said. " The who did it?" She asked. " I dont know but it wasnt me." He replied

And if you want it to be more unique then

Eg: " I am not at fault. " Justin said fearing her reaction. "Then who did it ?" She asked angrily. "I dont know but it wasnt me." He said with determination.

Try showing the emotions of the character while writing the dialogue.

Thank you so much behen🤗 I will try this in next update and try to avoid standalone dialogues, improvement status batana😆 ek aur doubt clear karde behen. Kisike thoughts likhte vakt kya karna hai, ese hi likh sakte hai ya single quotes, me confused

Originally posted by: bhshre95

Thank you so much behen🤗 I will try this in next update and try to avoid standalone dialogues, improvement status batana😆 ek aur doubt clear karde behen. Kisike thoughts likhte vakt kya karna hai, ese hi likh sakte hai ya single quotes, me confused

She thought, Was I right?

She thought, ' Was I right?'

Both are fine.

Thoughts are those which can either be written like other quotations or like normal sentences