Pavagadh (part I)
DM calls home one day suddenly from the factory. Moti picks up and expects him to talk to her. But Dharamraj says, "I want to speak to Sanntuudi now". There is a pregnant pause from Moti and then, "Eh Santuudi, tripura sundari, aren't you dead yet? Or are you deaf?"
Moti then tells DM to hold on when to her shock DM says,
DM: Listen Mrs. Kanji Waghela, Santu Mahiyavanshi is my wife. I expect you to treat her well. No more cursing from you.
Santu (comes and takes the phone from Moti calmly): Haan, it's me Santu.
DM: Why are you panting my dear? I am going to say something to you now. Don't say anything or react. Just listen and do the needful ok? You and I are going to Pavagadh this afternoon. I will bring the car at 2pm. Be ready for a 5 day trip. Not a word to anyone except Toral, ok Dufford. (He hangs up)
Santu puts the phone down and turns to go when Moti interrupts "what did naanka want?"
Santu: (smiles mysteriously) it's a matter between man and wife, ben baa. (She walks off)(Moti stands around for a while with her mouth gaping like a goldfish suffering from oxygen deficit. Check mate!)
Now Santu realizes that Moti is following her. So instead to going to Toral, she goes to the kitchen and tells Champu loudly, "Champakali, today malik wants to eat Undiyo and aaloo parathas for lunch. Come on let's get on with it". (Moti thinks, "Oh! Is that it? And all this koochie koo on the phone? It's all the pillow talk")
After half an hour, Santu stealthily sidles to Toral and tells her the secret and asks her to tell Baa only after she and DM call from Pavagadh. Toral is excited but banks it quickly and begins her conspiracy. She packs a bag efficiently and then goes to Santu's bedroom where Santu has already put DM's things ready on the bed to be packed. Toral quickly puts all the things together, creeps to her car and then drives to the factory. She transfers the baggage to DM's car's boot and then goes to meet him.
Toral: Pappa, good morning. Your work is done. Hiten has done the booking in the resort and here is the voucher. The baggage is in the boot. Have a good time. Hiten and I will manage everything. You don't worry. I will be dropping Foi to Jamkhambadiya. After that I will call you. And I have given Santu her new mobile phone. (She leaves)
DM: (Smiles and nods)Gaadi patthri peh aa gayi lagta hai (I think the train is sitting pretty on its rails)
DM calls Santu on her mobile and tells her to come to the main gate of the house in twenty minutes. She is there when he whizzes by and stops to pick her up. They are on the way!
Pavagadh (part 2)
They reach the resort on Surat highway. Santu looks around anxiously but prefers to keep quiet. She is teetering on high heels and lags behind while DM walks ahead with giant steps. At the foyer DM is waiting impatiently with hands on hips and Santu waddles her way to him. His eyeballs roll up and he smiles as he looks pointedly at her feet. They are ushered into their suite.
DM: Eh Sanntuudi, you are very quiet. When are you going to sway towards me and fall into my arms like you did once before? (He shakes his head and looks at her). Cat got your tongue?
Santu: Malik, I have a doubt. What are we going to be doing so differently here that we haven't done at home yet? (DM looks at her in alarm wondering what she had been listening to). What is the agenda?
DM: (Shakes his head) Agenda? 🤔Have you learnt nothing these few weeks? Ok now you will want to unpack. What all did you bring for me?
Santu: "Malik, I brought 5 kurtas, dhotis, all your 5 hair brushes, the machchar maseen, my copper glass for water, Subhadra malkin's portrait, the lamp, wicks, oil……." Then she says "you see malik, I don't know which hair brush you want to use tonight; (DM's eyebrows shoot up) By the way, what is the sequence of events tonight? I also brought Subhadra malkin's, that is, our first SR saree and all the stone daagenas to wear.
(Now DM is getting impatient) He passes a brown paper package to her. "Here, Toral asked me to give this to you". Santu opens the packet and sees a knee length, floral green, satin sleeveless nightie. Her mouth falls open and she looks up at DM who is also looking at the nightie and at Santu alternatively.
Santu: Oh God, this looks like Birwa's dress malik. 😲Someone made a mistake.
DM (smacking his forehead) Eh dufford, this is a nightdress. Most women wear it to sleep in. Sigh! Even Birwa knows more about the birds and bees than this wife of mine.
Santu (clearing her throat) Malik, we have to observe Brahmacharya strictly for the next 5 days since we are going to visit Khodiyar maa temple also. So … I mean… Let me first find the correct site to place Subhi's portrait, and light the lamp. Then while you talk to it, I will dress up in malkin's sari and jewellery and then ….
DM: Brahmacharya? Why? What is this new vrat you have invented? Brahmacharya is some con game that women thought up centuries ago to keep the men out of their beds. Come here.
Santu: Ok then malik. I am leaving your hairbrushes here.
DM: I don't want hairbrushes, my hair is gelled back alright. You don't need to wear Subhi's sari or anything. We have been through that part of it, remember? We have progressed far beyond when we rolled on the hay?
DM to Santu: Eh biwi, I brought you here to relax and spend time in your company. Do you know that a woman is both wife and mother? When you are with me you are my wife, my partner in passion and love. This time is for us, man and wife, for bonding and passion. Do you understand our needs?
DM tells Santu that he will go outside for a while to call Toral to tell her to inform Baa and Bapuji.
He returns in half an hour and comes into the suite. Santu is lounging on the bed, wearing the nightie, combing the tangles out of her wet hair.
DM stands at the closed door and looks at her for many minutes. Yeh hui na baat! Kabhi kabhi dufford hone ka naatak toh nahi kar rahi hai? (Wow, this is it. I wonder if she pretends to be a dufford at times)
Vanshaj
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