Posted:
Originally posted by: sectoreight
But don't you feel that the singhs themselves are responsible for this by integrating her into the family and the family functions/pujas to begin with. They opened their arms to her and told her that she is just like family. Naturally she took it at face value. What is wrong in what she did here? I hold the singhs responsible for giving her that much entry into their family affairs. She was naturally carried away because she had never been part of a loving family. Now suddenly she is seen as an intruder. This blow-hot/blow-cold approach is not nice by the singhs.I feel that there should definitely have been a distance between them after Jagya's engagement to saanchi, but don't you feel that it is for Jagya himself to draw the line? I mean ganga is not throwing herself at him in any way. She happens to be completely at his mercy right now, financially and accommodation wise. If he wants to come near her, she cannot really say no, (or can she?)Ashima was an independent professional. If she didn't get the love she was looking for she backed off because she was not dependent on shiv either for money or for a roof over her head.I'm not challenging you, just asking questions which came to my mind when I read your post. Please don't take it otherwise.
sectoreight, you make an excellent point about Ganga's background which has lead to her life getting so closely entangled with the Singhs. Considering that it was the first time Ganga knew what it meant to be part of a loving family, she cannot be faulted for trying to assimilate herself into it, to see herself as a part of it and perhaps given her implicit attraction to Jagya, she must have unconsciously wanted to become a legal member of the family. It is natural that she got carried away, and unconsciously she was trying to cling on to the place that had offered her security and love for the first time in her life.
I also agree with you that the Singhs gave her too much freedom. The Singhs are kind to everyone and try to help all, surely both them and Ganga should have known that her stay at the haveli was temporary? I find it uncharacteristic and unrealistic of the Singhs that as much as they could have supported Ganga and her child, given her a place to stay, opportunity to study and moral and emotional support, they should not have let her interfere in the close family matters.
There are certain boundaries regarding family matters which no other person can cross without repercussions, and Ganga was shown to overstep those boundaries, dispensing free advice. In the same context, I found Anandi telling Ganga to take care of the Singhs strange as Ganga was an abused woman who needed to be rehabilitated, and not a part of the Singhs family.
Ideally the Singhs should have set firmer boundaries. It was the overlapping of the delicate family boundaries that made Sumitra feel challenged in her own house. It was a very natural reaction to see an outsider however sweet and good, taking too much freedom in her house. Ganga should have taken the hints at that time itself. But even after getting repeated hints from Sumitra, she continues to want to cook for the Singhs, organise Jagya's birthday party, dance, bake cakes etc. when she should have been thinking of her future and where she would go from here.
I found the whole birthday arrangements and Ganga's tears over the shagun quite out of place. Also the line 'I am not worthy of you' in her emotional letter to Jagya and how she walked out in the rain, with flashbacks of their moments together. As Dadisa requested her, she could have waited till he and Bhairon came, discussed the matter and Bhairon / Jagya would have arranged for her to stay elsewhere until she leaves for Mangalore.
I do agree the distancing should have been from both sides. Jagya has made a commitment and should have honored it - like he could have taken someone else along with him to the court (not just him and Ganga showing up for the latter's divorce case) and arranged for a responsible person to drop Ganga at Mangalore.
I did not think that you are challenging me at all. I appreciate and respect the way you hold discussions on this forum. I understand where you are coming from, and I really like the way you clearly put forth interesting questions open for discussion.
More than watching the serial itself, I enjoy reading such thoughtful discussions here. I miss the posts by members like woman11, tinoo etc. who used to write similar long and wonderful posts analysing the show and relating it to real life social norms and situations. I simply ignore the aggressive posts by members who are determined to prove that only their views are correct, and don't bother to read them at all.
It is a pleasure to be part of such civil discussions where the members openly share their views and respectfully agree to disagree at times. 😊
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