Reality check for Ganga - Page 8

Originally posted by: leavesandwaves

There are men who marry prostitutes out of sympathy.
There are men who marry handicapped due to sympathy factor,

Why men only?

Even women do that.
There are women who marry men out of sympathy like caring for the child of a widower or a divorcee.
There are women who marry handicapped men out of sympathy.

There are things other than love and money. That is called compassion. That does not make the relationship any less.

The world is not one dimensional.

yes they do but do you the plight of the weaker partner in these marriages? they always have this in a corner of their heart that his/her life partner is better than him/her? this thing is always there in their back of mind and they are sad somewhere because of this.

They also feel bad for their life partner somewhere because they feel they would have got a better match instead of me...that insecurity is always there...

life is not hunky dory...

i used to think like this before i got married and used to think that wow! what if a good looking prince charming marries me...my older friends used to always point it out to me that ...it is best if both the life partners are equal in looks, status and education...and I used to argue with them that all these 'materialistic' things should not come in between when it is the matter of Love...

but i feel i was wrong... marriage cannot solely be based on love... marriage is like a business partnership, if one partner is better than the other say if he/she puts more money in the start up capital of the business the other partner is going to be intimidated by that, so the other partner will always feel like the weaker link...higher profit share will always be given to the partner who had put in more money as start up capital..

marriage is just not love its running the house together , raising the kids together...so its best if both the partners are equal..

in case of ganga...earlier with ratan singh as her husband she was mistreated to the core...and was always pointed out by ratan singh and his family that she was nothing but filth...but ganga kept being strong and started to find an escape route...you know why? because she knew that she was far more better person than ratan singh and his family...she knew she does not deserve staying like this...so that confidence developed in her...

once ganga marries jagat, though she will get educated and start earning she will always feel that jagat and his family are too good for her...she will always have this in her heart that somewhere jagat did a huge favor to her...and that will make her confidence dwindle and later cause sorrow in her heart...

@lovesunshine,just want to share if thats the reality then anandi should also feel low about her.Just want to mention mahi's dialogue that so many girls had a crush for shiv but shiv chose a village girl who is also a divorcee.If people think that anandi is not apt for shiv then its their wrong perception.If anandi feels shiv would have get better girl then her then she is wrong to think that.This kind of thinking should be changed and thats the reason cvs are showing such relations.Ganga will not think low about her because not only jagya did favour to her she also saved his life two times also made him realized what he should do and put him on the right track.We shouldn't fall in love is a different matter but if we already fall in love unintentionally then no one can do anything.Cvs are nowhere showing her as a maid but still she is being called maid.She is poor but she is beautiful,very intelligent,caring and patient what more jagya need.If after marriage he mentions something like ganga was poor or something then he deserves a slapand also gangacan counterattack saying that jagya has failed in his marriage two times but I think just like shiv jagya will accept ganga wholeheartedly.Also when you actually love your partner you can never mention his or her sensitive issues and taunt them.

Originally posted by: shankythebest

@lovesunshine,just want to share if thats the reality then anandi should also feel low about her.Just want to mention mahi's dialogue that so many girls had a crush for shiv but shiv chose a village girl who is also a divorcee.If people think that anandi is not apt for shiv then its their wrong perception.If anandi feels shiv would have get better girl then her then she is wrong to think that.This kind of thinking should be changed and thats the reason cvs are showing such relations.Ganga will not think low about her because not only jagya did favour to her she also saved his life two times also made him realized what he should do and put him on the right track.We shouldn't fall in love is a different matter but if we already fall in love unintentionally then no one can do anything.Cvs are nowhere showing her as a maid but still she is being called maid.She is poor but she is beautiful,very intelligent,caring and patient what more jagya need.If after marriage he mentions something like ganga was poor or something then he deserves a slap but I think just like shiv jagya will accept ganga wholeheartedly.

come on anandi's situation and her suffering CANNOT be compared with ganga's that two totally different thing..the only common point in both cases was child marriage..

besides anandi was not crying her eyes out when that ashima was holding shiv's hands and was sitting close to him..in fact she was joking that ashima must be shiv's girlfriend..

anandi is shown as a self made woman...she was not at all thinking of falling in love or getting married she was thinking abt how to improve herself and her jaitsar..

anandi did not have a kid from jagya...she already was a somebody a 'sarpanch' of jaitsar when she was introduced to shiv...and people respected her a lot in jaitser... shiv did not rehabilitate her ...anandi saved herself on her own...and i dont mean financial support from the singhs...anandi decided her route by herself and knew what she wanted to do in her life when it was clear that jagya had no interest in her and cheated on her..

besides it was dadisa who was trying to push anandi towards Shiv ..anandi by herself was not even thiking of shiv as a love interest...

even when shiv asked her whether she wants to marry her..anandi took quite some time to take a decision in fact initially she rejected the proposal point blank because she did not want anyone to have mercy on her and marry her as favor.. please watch old episodes..

It was jagya who 'decided' for ganga that she should take up nursing as her career...shiv never told anandi what she should do for her career...

Originally posted by: lovesunshine

See dear its not abt rich and poor...

I was talking in real life...nothing like this happen...in fiction it is portrayed but because of it young girls/boys should not start dreaming of getting a rich prince /princess in marriage...

Imagine for example if I am a dukhiyaari girl like ganga and a boy like jagya helps me out and then marries me and at one point in life during a husband /wife squabble, if he will taunt me or try to mark it out to me that he helped me and did a favour for me and changed me from rags to riches? am I going to like it? no...i will always feel indebted to my husband for this...a relationship quotient of an husband and wife in REAL life should be equal...if one partner feels indebted to other then its not going to be a healthy relationship in the future...

@lovesunshine...i think today's educated generation is quite mature not to get influenced by whatever is shown in serials/movies...as most serials/movies wil always show us a larger than life picture.
on @bold...that mostly happens with arranged marriages...but there's no guarantee that people wont change in due course of time...and whats wrong if a girl feels indebted to her husband..in a way its good as she will always have respect for him...and once decided & married both are equals...😊..and building a healthy relationship is completely in their hands.

as far as ganga is concerned, if JaG2 happens ( which am sure will happen 😉) she will be getting into this relationship being fully aware of the consequences...so she is prepared for the problems that will follow...and jagya's support will give her the strength to sustain this relation..

so as @leaves said...you can't plan everything in life...sometimes just trust yourself..take a decision and move on & give ur best to it...dont worry too much about the unforeseen consequences.

I am not comparing anandi and ganga.You have mentioned that when husband or wife has some issues or lackings they feel low about themselves.Shiv was the most eligible bachelor,urmi devi was dying to get get her daughter married to shiv,ashima used to love him but anandi barely got a good alliance because of divorcee tag.So she would have felt low in front of shiv but she doesn't and she shouldn't.Same thing will be applied in ganga's case.She has also done favours on jagya.I have edited my post and included that if jagya ever taunts ganga then she can also taunt calling him a two tome marriage failure.

Originally posted by: BeyondTheSky

@lovesunshine...i think today's educated generation is quite mature not to get influenced by whatever is shown in serials/movies...as most serials/movies wil always show us a larger than life picture.
on @bold...that mostly happens with arranged marriages...but there's no guarantee that people wont change in due course of time...and whats wrong if a girl feels indebted to her husband..in a way its good as she will always have respect for him...and once decided & married both are equals...😊..and building a healthy relationship is completely in their hands.

as far as ganga is concerned, if JaG2 happens ( which am sure will happen 😉) she will be getting into this relationship being fully aware of the consequences...so she is prepared for the problems that will follow...and jagya's support will give her the strength to sustain this relation..

so as @leaves said...you can't plan everything in life...sometimes just trust yourself..take a decision and move on & give ur best to it...dont worry too much about the unforeseen consequences.

...when it comes to looking at life from the other end...i always end up giving indications to younger people that what they might have in store in the future...thats my problem and i think i should stop doing it on the forum...


Respect in between a wife and a husband should be MUTUAL and not one sided...so ganga ofcourse with no doubt respects jagya...and will continue...but will she ever consider herelf as equal ot jagya? never.. that is what is disturbing me when i think about ganga jagya marriage..
and if she does then i will support this marriage with all my heart...

Originally posted by: leavesandwaves

All of us do so many things at the same time. Why make exception for ganga?

We go to coaching classes to get high percentage, also go to music or dance classes, try to go out with friends for films, have infatuations, try to do part time job and get more expense money if we are students.

If married, try to take care of the babies by not neglecting the husband or inlaws, have fights with them on occasions, try to commit suicide when things go overboard, have affairs if we are so inclined, flirt with strangers, catch husband doing the same, employ private detectives, think of having one more baby or abortion. Not able to decide whether to leave the job to take care of straying kids or employ someone to do this thing for us. After leaving the job feeling restless and taking it out on other family members. The list is endless.

We dont wait for things to happen. We make things happen. We multi task. Sometimes we plan and sometimes we dont plan.

Someone aptly said it is TV Land. And a lot of things happen in TV Land that are not possible in real world. Had it been some other serial, perhaps people would not bother because they are just for entertainment and fairy tales are indeed entertainment. Here they are so preachy and their VO gives pearls of wisdom like such things happen in (real) life, so we have right to criticize the track if it is far from reality.

Originally posted by: SPuja

Someone aptly said it is TV Land. And a lot of things happen in TV Land that are not possible in real world. Had it been some other serial, perhaps people would not bother because they are just for entertainment and fairy tales are indeed entertainment. Here they are so preachy and their VO gives pearls of wisdom like such things happen in (real) life, so we have right to criticize the track if it is far from reality.

Educated people may not get influenced by this, but imagine someone in rural area/urban slums (TVs are available even in these areas) in somewhat similar situation (a tortured girl with disrupted education) - she may be a balika vadhu, even a housemaid, she may think that she just has to escape the situation and everything will be rosy - if Ganga can get a handsome wealthy doctor and can pass 10 class in two-three months and to nursing college just after 10th class (eligibility to join even diploma/ANM course is 10+2, but Ganga will get admission in nursing directly after 10th class)- why can't she? If Ganga can live in haveli with all expenses paid for her, girls in similar situations in real life will dream big and then fall flat, that's why, CVs should show tracks judiciously (either don't get preachy or show (as far as possible) tracks that have a possibility in real life.

very well said SPuja👏

Originally posted by: lovesunshine

very well said SPuja👏

Then we have to ban films, fairytales everything. Slum people are much smarter and wordlywise than we think.
I agree they should not have fast tracked ganga's education. It takes years and years of hardwork.
Ganga should have opted for a practical career like starting a creche for kids of women labourers. Or supervising hospital low level workers.

No one wants to give her credit for taking care of pregnant Gehna, cooking etc. that she is doing for hers and Mannu's boarding and lodging. Cant she get paid some minimum wages for those chores? If they employ caretakers, cooks they have to pay. Nowadays, they say even housewives work should get monetarily calculated. Dont rich people, working couple pay full time servants apart giving them boarding and lodging? Is it not a career by itself?