Posted:
Tinoo - You can have your own ideas on what a child can expect of his/her parents in terms of
- no choice in being born
- no choice in customs of the land (ie - bal vivah)
- no choice in the finances of the house (rich or poor)
- no choice in the kind of parents on gets (ie - Gauri's wonderful Mom)
But the way things work atleast in old cultures - and I mean India specifically when I say so - is that
A Parent usually provides the best he can for the kid and loves and cares and provides for them till they get married. At the same time - they also care for their old parents and keep them involved - thus setting an example for how the aged need to be kept close, respected and cared for. The aged in turn - provide guidance and foresight if they see something going wrong. Other times they provide extra love and affection to the kids coz parents can sometimes feel a little rushed and impatient.
Here - Jagya was given whatever any other kid in that position wud be given in similar circumstances. Most kids then got married at 8-10 yrs in those villages so Bhairon cannot be said to have "purposely ruined J's life". Bhairon lives with his mom and respects her and her decisions.
Jagya
- chose to follow a profession of his liking
- chose to move away to pursue his dream
- chose to try to fit in the new place by hiding his background
- chose to return affections of another girl KNOWING he was not single.
- chose to keep mum to his GF, wife n parents about this dilemma
When finally it all tumbled out and G threatened to leave - he chose to marry her w/o even consulting a lawyer or informing his parents or wife.
And now - having done nothing but take take take from his family - he wants them to gift him a huge section of the properety that he has done nothing to look after or maintain ?
He has not even bothered to be respectful to his parents or care for their pain and has just hung his head everytime he wanted to be accepted ?
Why wud I like my own child if I can see he likes me only for what I can give more ? Bhairon shud threaten to drag J's sorry ass to jail for bigamy.
I have no complaints with G this time - as she is a rank outsider. She is just an instigator - the stupidity of accepting her logic lies with J and he shud suffer the consequences of his line of thought and actions.
Being my own person with my own choices and my own free will is all very well but only after you have dealt with your due obligations. True - u don't get to chose yr circumstances but that is life. He was not born an orphan and thus he has to cater to the family that bore him. He is from a Village in India and he just has to deal with it.
He is NOT in US or any other place where expectations from kids are a little different. There - parents too don't provide very much except a loving household till you're a teen. You have to get your own college loan and in school times, work for your pocket money. There no one sends you money for sustenance of your married life and pregnant girl friend either.
Kumkum Bhagya
Arjun
