Member of the Week - Krutilynn - Page 3

Teaching must undoubtedly be very satisfying.. If only I had the patience..Sigh..

Is there a particular reason why you are not sure if you want to have kids? Is it because of career reasons or is it because of just a "gut feeling"? I know people who have decided not to have kids because of the latter - so just curious..If it is something you don't feel comfortable telling, feel free to skip it.😊

What is the meaning of your name?

Originally posted by: xyzzee

Teaching must undoubtedly be very satisfying.. If only I had the patience..Sigh..Girl, you have a kid, right? You probably have more patience than me 😊

Is there a particular reason why you are not sure if you want to have kids? Is it because of career reasons or is it because of just a "gut feeling"? I know people who have decided not to have kids because of the latter - so just curious..If it is something you don't feel comfortable telling, feel free to skip it.😊 Actually it is primarily career reasons...i dont want to have a kid and then not be able to focus on him/her. I have a tendency to get carried away with work and often work for 24-36 hours at a time even before i started my thesis. If i dont have any pending papers, i sit with higher level math or physics or economics books and solve problems!!!🤓 Given this tendency, i am worried that i would not be able to be fair to my child(ren) so i am hesitant to have kids. Also, i have been in school for the past 25 years of my life in one capacity or the other and after making a lot of personal sacrifices in the process, i want to focus on myself for a few years anyway. I know some people will find this very selfish - but my friends have a pool going on right now about when will my biological clock chime!😆 Because i have been through the stage when i wanted kids so badly and am over it!

What is the meaning of your name? "creation"

Originally posted by: Aparna_BD

Hi Krut , i am so excited to see you on the hot seat . Thank you, i was looking forward to your questions.I was waiting to grill you with questions but just got the time to type them .I must say you are one of the coolest ,most bindaas people on the Astitva section of this forum . Love your openness and honesty as i am like you. Thank you for your sweet words...but i find that a lot of us are like this on this forum so it is so easy to communicate!

Some of the questions have already been answered by you . Lyn sounds like a great guy . I have another friend married to a gora American who's a good friend but i find his disinterest in India, Indian customs ,Indian culture very annoying.Good to know Lyn finds it interesting. I am so passionate about India that in the past i have restricted communications with some indians even - the type who just dont want to accept their origins kind of people...dating or marrying someone who feels like that was out of the question. I know it sounds rude, but i always tell my american acquaintances who are uptight that if i am deferential to their "culture and customs" they have to show mine the same respect or not bother me and waste my time by communicating with me!

1) Has Lyn ever found any Indian custom distastefull ? What serials does he watch on Zee ? Can he relate to them ? It is not really a custom as much as an observation that he despises - many indian men tend to walk 15-20 steps ahead of their wives. Also many men that we have seen here in Texas tend to allow their wives to carry groceries/shopping bags, etc. while they walk without anything in their hand. This really ticks lynn off. More than once i have stopped him from going and helping out the woman because it could potentially lead to an argument in the parking lot!! He watches Astitva, SRGMP, used to watch Kashish & he adored Kareena-Kareena. He occassionally watches Saat Phere but he is usually agitated by the time it ends... I think he sees the serials with a viewpoint of learning more language and customs rather than any other reason. But he does discuss them with me and often says things like "If Aastha was my daughter (the old one that died) I would have tried to talk it out with her and if required given her a spanking for behaving like this." So i guess he does get affected by some emotional scenes!

2) Whats the last fiction you read ? Reccomend me a bunch of good fictions .( No medical mysteries as i don't like them) All the books by Dan Brown - Da Vinci Code, Angels & Demons, DEception point and Digital Fortress are some of my latest favorites. They are all mysteries but not medical - you might enjoy them! I did 😊

3)How long have you been both living together ? Have you met Lyn's parents ? How did you celebrate Christmas and Thanksgiving ? We were room-mates (more aptly, house-mates for two years) before we decided that we liked each other and its been a year and half since we got engaged...so about 3.5 years or so. Even when we were roomies, i used to go to his family's house for the holidays because it gets pretty lonely with all friends gone to their families houses. So i have been celebrating christmas and thnxgiving with his folks for about 4 years now. We usually go there the day before the holiday, and since i am veggie his dad (a very sweet man) makes me veggie versions of all the food items and i get to bring them home with me!! We usually follow xmas and thnxgiving traditions of his family...and in-between we usually celebrate Diwali so the whole month is usually holiday mode!!

4) Whats the other forum you mentioned you visit ? Whats it about ? Orkut is a bunch of communities on different topics. Same concept as IF but the discussions are more generic rather than region specific. It is international and is google sponsored. If you want an invite, send me a PM and i will send you the link for orkut.

5) Does Lynn share your love for doggies ? Before i met lynn, i was scared of dogs - not too much because i used to play with my friends' dogs but just a teensy weensy scared. He actually gave me the confidence of getting dogs...he already had Mazzy so we got two more after that.

6) How long have you been living in the U.S ? 8 years

7) 3 things you love about the U.S and 3 things you dislike about it ? Freedom to be myself, good quality higher education, acceptance of women as an equal gender! Dislikes: too many people hooked on drugs (whether legal or medical), selfishness developed in so many people that have migrated here from our des, an ethnocentric approach of many americans.

8) 3 things you miss about India and 3 things you don't care about ? I miss the food, my family (and in general the atmosphere everywhere) and my Kinetic Honda. I dont miss - constantly being made to feel inferior by non-family members for being a female, comments made by people when they saw me communicate with boys, and lack of dignity of labor.

9) Whats your Zodiac? Growwwllll....LEO (100% leo in every inch of myself!)

10 ) What are your plans for the New year ? Probably going to wear a saree that lynn bought for me for my birthday and go to a good restaurant for dinner...coming home, lighting a fire and kicking back and relaxing with a bottle of wine watching TV!
.........phew 10 question mark !!!🥱 Phew my answers are probably longer than you expected...😆

P.S - i know i asked tons of questions about Lyn .....like he's on the hot seat ? O he is cooking so i asked him what i should write for the questions addressed to him, and he LOVED the attention! BTW , what does he feel about your blogging on I-F ?😉 He is very encouraging and supportive about it...every once in a while he asks me "so aaje ketla friend banaya?" [Translation: how many friends you made today] or "how many people did you irritate today?" 😆

Originally posted by: Aparna_BD

Krut i loved your answers . And tell Lynn i am impressed at how well he's picked up a Indian language in 4 yrs( !!??) 😃Sure, i will tell him...he just read through the entire discussion also!

Just one short question , i read you love Enid Blyton ....me too !! You mentioned the Enchanted Forest series . Who was your most favourite character in that book (i adore moon face , saucepan man , and Mrs Wash a lot 🤗 ) I think my fav used to be Moon face and his house, where everything was circular. I am not sure if i remember all the worlds but there were so many that i liked. One i remember clearly is the "Lady who lived in a shoe" where all the children get confused with her children and a couple of the kids ran down the enchanted tree and started living in Moonface's house or something - but i might be mixing up stories. I loved the slippery slide that took the kids from Moonface's house to the bottom of the tree...o boy...some memories!!

Gosh i am tempted to drop my current novel and read it again . In Up the faraway Tree/ Enchanted Forest ....remember the top of the tree gets different world dropping buy !!??!! Any world you loved ? 😊
Do you still read them ? I have the collection of that particular series - Enchanted Forest , Up the Faraway Tree , Wishing Chair , etc etc at home and occasionaly read a chapter .😛

I had given my enid blyton series to a family friend's kid (she was 15 years younger than i was) before i came to the US and she loved them so much that i let her keep it. But i have been meaning to start my collection again soon. There is no harm in being a child at heart at any age 😃

Loved reading your answers Kruti and I agree completeley on the Indian Culture bit.. I can't stand people disrespecting the Indian Culture and talk of it loosely.

Ohhhh, you reminded me of Enid Blyton and got me nostalgic again.. Enid Blyton was the author who actually developed the passion for reading in me..As Aparna says I was amazed that they had not heard of Enid Blyton here in the US!! My brother went to India and got a whole series for his daughter.. I go to my brother's place and if people find me missing, they know where to look for me - in their little library room with an Enid Blyton in hand..Secret Seven, Five Findouters, Malorie Towers, St Claires, The Adeventure Series and the list goes on and on..

Yes, these serials portray such a wrong impression of India, Indian Women and Indian Culture.. And the media makes it worse..Have you read Thomas Friedman's "The world is flat". Great book! I am sure you will like it. Tom Friedman has lived in India for 18 months and what an insight he has of India. He was also comparing (rather contrasting) the plight of Indian women with some women from other parts of the world.. How Indian women are so empowered and India has seen a woman PM, an Indian woman (regardless of her religion) can become a famous movie star or MP.. So different from what the media portrays of India and Indian women - where some have gone to the extent of writing that Indian women just sit at home and have babies and that's all they do 😡 .. Anyways, do let me know if you have read it..

Are you figure/health/beauty conscious? What are your favourite Indian and Western outfits?

Originally posted by: Aparna_BD

Krut when i came to the U.S , my parents moved house too . So i ended up loosing some of my novels & Enid Blytons .( I don't suppose my folks realised how much the Enchanted Forest Series meant to me 😭 ) . Well , anyways on a trip back to India i went and picked up my complete collection of that series and Harry Potter series and bought it along . That series justs puts smiles on my face everytime . I am sure you'll love it as much . You can buy it on Amazon or when you got to India . B & N and Borders hasn't even heard of Enid Blyton . Can u imagine ? 😕

Ya i know that barnes & Noble and Borders havent even heard of Enid Blyton...it was among the first things i tried to get also. My promises to myself as soon as i graduate & get a real job are:

1) Get all the books that i have been meaning to get - Enid Blyton, Tintin, & Asterix series from wherever i can get them

2) Go to the Galleria (the most expensive and beautiful mall in Dallas) and buy myself an outfit

I know it sounds crazy, but I have set these goals for the past three and a half years that i have spent in grad school to encourage myself to get done with it ASAP. 😆

Originally posted by: xyzzee

Loved reading your answers Kruti and I agree completeley on the Indian Culture bit.. I can't stand people disrespecting the Indian Culture and talk of it loosely. Thank you...I try so hard in my classes to convey the correct versions of the story also. Whenever somebody asks me a question like - we have heard that India is very poor or "Why is the GDP of India so low" or "Does female literacy rate vary substantially from males in India?' my answers are usually: Well, remember that you are talking about 1.3 billion people that live in an area the size of Texas+Oklahoma. The cost of living is lower and hence a lower GDP in terms of dollars goes a longer way. As far as the media representing slums of Calcutta or Bombay are concerned, what about New York? I explain that an average indian in rural area might feel that all westerners have loose values and look like the babes on Baywatch! As far as female literacy rate is concerned, 58% of women are literate and 62% of men are literate - this could either be a statistical error margin or the average literacy rate is 60% so no substantial difference. Also, in India literacy rate is calculated on the basis of whether someone can count from 1 to 10 and sign their own name, which is not sufficient to describe behavior of a literate individual. WHen people compete against a billion other people, the people that do get education are substantially better off than people in other parts of the world.

Ohhhh, you reminded me of Enid Blyton and got me nostalgic again.. Enid Blyton was the author who actually developed the passion for reading in me..As Aparna says I was amazed that they had not heard of Enid Blyton here in the US!! My brother went to India and got a whole series for his daughter.. I go to my brother's place and if people find me missing, they know where to look for me - in their little library room with an Enid Blyton in hand..Secret Seven, Five Findouters, Malorie Towers, St Claires, The Adeventure Series and the list goes on and on..O ya...read my reply to Aparna...me loves them too 😃

Yes, these serials portray such a wrong impression of India, Indian Women and Indian Culture.. And the media makes it worse..Have you read Thomas Friedman's "The world is flat". Great book! I am sure you will like it. Tom Friedman has lived in India for 18 months and what an insight he has of India. He was also comparing (rather contrasting) the plight of Indian women with some women from other parts of the world.. How Indian women are so empowered and India has seen a woman PM, an Indian woman (regardless of her religion) can become a famous movie star or MP.. So different from what the media portrays of India and Indian women - where some have gone to the extent of writing that Indian women just sit at home and have babies and that's all they do 😡 .. Anyways, do let me know if you have read it..

I havent but i will...As far as female empowerment is concerned, OK i am going to go into an academic spiel hoping that people dont get offended or bored because this is a subject close to my heart. One of my most important research topics is - Gender disparity in countries of the world. If you google Kruti Dholakia HDI you will get the paper that i have written on status of women. But it is a little academic and dry so i will try to put the gist of it here - Countries are ranked by United Nations Development Program on the basis of development as measured by life expectancy, literacy rate, and per capita GDP in dollars (adjusted for purchasing power international level). India ranks 104th out of 150. However, when taking into consideration gender specific rates and disparity, India ranks 99th. Which indicates that while on the whole India is still developing, women are better off in India than men. I hope this makes sense...

I had written to the INS and some government officials when i first came here and found a lot of indian women who were here on H4 visas could not work. I wrote to these places requesting that these women should be empowered rather than sponsoring the wrong ideas of other people who think that Indian women are barefeet, pregnant, in sarees and uncommunicative!!!! Of course i never received an answer...but nonetheless i had tried! O well, so now my efforts are all focused on removing these misconceptions from people's minds.

Are you figure/health/beauty conscious? Not at all...I am conscious about gaining too much weight because it tends to make me tired and inefficient but i dont monitor my food or habits in general. Usually my stomach is sensitive enough to react to high fat foods so i have maintained myself for over 14 years - i look the same and am the same size since i got into high school - well i did get about 3 inches taller in college!!! I used to play pro-tennis before high school but dont have the time/interest/energy to pursue it much these days. I dont even know how to wear make-up 😕 but i do use lipstick otherwise i tend to chew my lips which i realized sometime back was considered to be a sexual behavior. Of course i was shocked and started wearing lipstick to be conscious about not doing that!!!

What are your favourite Indian and Western outfits? I love wearing sarees and wear them at the drop of a hat. Many a times i just wear them around the house. I have a good collection...yayeee....

Among western outfits - on a daily basis, i am a total jeans/t-shirts and boots girl. But i love wearing suits with ties to class. I am not much gung-ho about accessories even though of late i have consciously been trying to match purses/belts/shoes...hahaha...because i want to look like a matured prof when i get a job in some univ.

sorry if that was too long of a response. 😃