Anupama is doing it AGAIN - Page 2

I don't think Anu is selfish or egoistic tbh... she is a good person who genuinely cares for all the family members...

But she was shown to be kind of ignorant right from the beginning, in fact she was far worse in this department in the earlier episodes (how did she think her her husband being bffs with his female subordinate who's around 20 years younger than him is normal?? 😕 And why did she still not consider the possibility of affair even after Devika and Aniruddh BOTH told her!? )

I think the problem here is that Anu is so concerned with keeping Baa happy all the time that she doesn't even stand up for herself (despite knowing that Baa is totally in the wrong most of the time)... and how often do people who don't know how to stand up for themselves stand up for others??

For some reason they've decided to make Anu be just like she was before the revelation again...

As for Kinjal, I can see why she wanted to be a part of this family... Toshu really loves her, and Anu is a caring MIL... Bapuji, Samar and Pankhi are nice to her too...

But the problem is that in sab logon ki kuch nahi chalti uss ghar mein! Vahan aaj bhi bakwas Baa aur uss ka laadla Vee ka raaj hain... (imagine if Anu or her kids did what Vanraj did? Would they be allowed to go in and out of the house as if nothing happened??)

And without realising, Anu's main priority has become keeping Baa happy over everyone else (as I'm sure we've all seen in our lives, when people become obsessed with pleasing everyone instead of doing the right thing, jaane anjaane they end up pandering to he WORST people in their respective lives, as sthey are the most demanding), so despite caring for Kinjal, and Kinjal caring for her back, Anu will ask Kinjal to put up with bs from Baa (who doesn't actually care much for Anu or Kinjal), and think that is acchai and sanskaar.

Originally posted by: -Anayah-

I can totally get behind what you are saying! I don't know why some people are basically attacking me as If Anupama is a real person and I am bullying her?

I just want the character to show some development, and a logical and organic growth. I feel she is yet to realize she is just a human and cannot do everything. It was her blind trust on her husband that gave her a shake off but she is still on the same path.

and for people who are talking about talking respectfully and peacefully, isn't that what Anupama did for like past 25 years? and her MIL is still mean to her and now pretty much insensitive with Vanraj coming and going like nothing is wrong and her asking Anupama to cook for him..

I better not talk about Toshu and Pakhi atm.. I can only hope it is building up to a bigger thing where they realize how terribly they behaved with their mom.

Ditto ! That's exactly my grudge with this character. It doesnt take 25 years for a woman to realize ppl r walking over her . She deserves respect and a lot of it , for Putting up with this family. How much love does she have for the mother of the man who treated her like a maid cum baby sitter and dumped her ? I find it weird. Ba doesnt even love her back ...yes , for family peace and unity she keeps quiet. N we all know where it led to. I'll say it again . She makes same mistakes and expect better results.

Originally posted by: -Anayah-

I can totally get behind what you are saying! I don't know why some people are basically attacking me as If Anupama is a real person and I am bullying her?

I just want the character to show some development, and a logical and organic growth. I feel she is yet to realize she is just a human and cannot do everything. It was her blind trust on her husband that gave her a shake off but she is still on the same path.

and for people who are talking about talking respectfully and peacefully, isn't that what Anupama did for like past 25 years? and her MIL is still mean to her and now pretty much insensitive with Vanraj coming and going like nothing is wrong and her asking Anupama to cook for him..

I better not talk about Toshu and Pakhi atm.. I can only hope it is building up to a bigger thing where they realize how terribly they behaved with their mom.

@bold - That is what has been the most interesting part of watching this show for me. Waiting to see how the character evolves after all that she holds true turns out to be a lie, and the belief that forms the bedrock of her relationship shatters.

Right from the beginning you knew the revelation about the affair would come and it would be cataclysmic. The way they had Anupamaa emphasise her faith in her husband constantly was to make the fall when it came that much harder. But, what they have shown so far has been disappointing. True, she has changed in her interactions with Vanraj, but I feel a broader self introspection is needed. ITV is so hooked on absolutes that characters are shown either all good or all bad. Veering on either side seems to confuse the CVs!

Baa's behaviour and treatment of Anupamaa has been appalling. She constantly insults and belittles her. That track where she had demanded all the family jewellery be given back was humiliating. And it's just one of many incidents. Overlooking small slights in the interest of harmony is one thing, but Baa crosses all limits. Anupamaa needs to understand the difference between the person and the position they hold. Self respect is important. And it doesn't mean that you have to disrespect others in order to do so. Anupamaa needs to find that path.

Originally posted by: -Anayah-

I don't think Anupama learned anything from the Vanraj cheating fiasco at all.

All I am seeing Anupama is being selfish, ignorant and egoistic person tbh. She lacks empathy, self respect and basic semblance of the situation. She is a terrible mother. Let me explain..

So she is thinking she can make Kinjal stay with "Love". Sorry but love isn't something you can chain people with, din't she learn that from whatever happened between her and her husband. All the love she showered on him was basically nothing to him because we as humans don't only need love.

She is selfish because she is only thinking about Toshu's happiness but not Kinjal's well being at all. You think some rich girl can manage into a middle class household? especially her being OTT happy and trying to do all that kitchen drama and all. I would have been assured if she took a stand when Baa was taunting at Kinjal, but she goes and tries to normalize it. Doormat 2.0 in the making, but don't think Kinjal can take it for long.. for one, she isn't Anupama from a poor family to put up with that shit and she is infact educated and get on her feet. If Baa continues her behaviour and Anupama - Toshu doesn't really take a stand for her, she will leave. That being said, I can also see Baa favouring Toshu over Kinjal and doing the Vanraj- anupama thing all over again.

She is ignorant with her limited world view, not everything is about family and her priorities are not everyone's priorities. She doesn't understand her limits when imposing her views on others, like she emotionally manipulated Rakhi to accept Toshu-Kinjal relationship, by scaring her about their elopement and how her only daughter might abandon her.

She is egoistic about her ability to manage relationships, earlier it was husband and wife one, now it is able to keep Kinjal at her home and change Rakhi's mind into accepting them. Relationships don't work like that, It was so toxic that she was trying to make Rakhi accept this new relationship.

Anupama lacks empathy - Not once did she feel remorse or sadness over Rakhi's situation that her only daughter - only child was not only against her, hate her and think she is some manipulative bit*h who is always plotting but had the gall to stop her slap because she is now Kinjal's MIL. So, If you marry someone, your relationship with your parents become NIL or what??

I do think slapping Kinjal is not right, but who gave Anupama any right to basically throw Rakhi's rights as a mother over Kinjal just like that?

She doesn't have any idea about how life works, only because it fits your fancy fairyland view, doesn't mean it is good for others too.

Anupama lacks Self Respect, Oh god at times I felt she was some leech. Anupama can learn a thing or two from Arundhati (Marathi counterpart of Anupama), Arundhati did grovel around for her son's marriage and all but the moment it came onto her husband and her family and its values, she herself broke the alliance and Abhishek (Marathi Toshu) was heartbroken but SO MATURE ABOUT IT and accepted the decision.

Anupama is a terrible terrible mother who only mollycoddled her children and we can see that in Toshu, Samar and Pakhi. Toshu and Pakhi cannot take no as an answer, they just have to have it or they will throw a tantrum. Samar is better in this department, but his mom worship is not letting him see Anupama's flaws.

at the end, I would like to say in the last few days I felt if Anupama's family needed some light, she wouldn't think for a second to burn down the neighbourhood, as long as HER family is happy right? 🤪

Extra Note Added:

I totally get how you feel. Although I don't necessarily agree with adjectives as selfish or egoistic as Charu said. But I do agree with all your reasons.

In fact, they pretty much express how I felt in all those situations. I seriously wonder what is so great about the Shah family that they use all that family drama to put Rakhi down. There is Baa - who turned her eyes blind just in 24 hours after EMA was revealed, and keeps blaming Rakhi-Kinjal while the actual problem lies with Vanraj. There is Pakhi, who behaves like nothing ever happened and things would be alright as long as her material needs are satisfied. There is Toshu whose brains don't work beyond his love for Kinjal. Rest are acceptable but they never try to make any difference. (Except Bapuji) I seriously wonder, how any of the things going on in that house can be called sanskar. Ignoring the issue and trying to normalizing it doesn't make it a great example.

I agree with the slap part, just because Anu spoils their kids beyond limitation, doesn't mean Rakhi should do the same. Marriage doesn't take her part away as a mother, to teach and protect her daughter.

I think it is the fault of the writing, I get it that everyone thinks their family is great - there is nothing wrong with how they function. My problem is with how they portray.

If Anu thinks she is doing everything for her parivaar then isn't Rakhi the same? They both are fighting for their own family, then why on earth Anu is made a hero and Rakhi a villain? There are some real double standards with how CVs are managing the whole thing.

Anu has logical limitations. they say right, "A frog in a well doesn't know the ocean". For her, her children are perfect, her saas is perfect and everyone in the family is perfect. She refuses to see the wrong, the same was with Vanraj's case when EMA wasn't revealed. She treated him like a god. For her whatever Baa is doing with Kinjal is alright, because she is failing to see any reasons why it is wrong in the first place.

I was taken aback when she told Kinjal, that she shouldn't worry about marriage ka Kharcha, adults will do it. I mean those two got married for god's sake, how they are still not adults, why they still should be spoon-fed?

I fail to understand Kinjal as well, even though Rakhi can come off very strong at a times. But her reasonings, most of the time are on point. Why she just silently takes all the insults, when Vanraj's EMA is the reason their relationship was broken. It was the reason for Rakhi's Tamasha. If Shah's family has a reputation to maintain, her parents don't have one or what!?

@Bold I agree big time. 👍🏼

Hey, sorry to disagree !

1. Kinjal married at her will and it was an informed decision though done in a haste. Like Anupama rightly said, Paritosh and Kinjal never had a problem in their relationship except that of parent's disapproval.

2. Kinjal is very well aware of Shah's financial situation and that Anupama is also struggling to work and make some money. Nothing has been pushed on her neither so far she has been shown to be deprived of her needs.

What is one's definition of a "need" may be other's "luxury". So practically what Rakhi thinks of something as Kinjal's NEED may not be truly a need.

3. Anupama is never shown to be so selfish that she will get happiness to her house at the cost of burning someone's desires. If that was so, she could have penalised Vanraj and Kavya to settle hefty money in lieu of their freedom to be together or marry. Anu may not be educated to find legal recourse, but could seek Devika's or Kinjal's help to seek legal recourse.

4. Anupama has let Vanraj be where he wants. She herself has taken the onus to look after the family.

5. Finally, yes to some extent she is very soft with her children. But she has put her foot down for any wrong doings they may do. She may not be shouting, you dont need to shout on grown ass kids like Kavya once did to Samar. Anupama had rightly taken a stand and shown Kavya her place.

Vanraj is largely responsible for Toshu and Pakhi's tantrum filled fits. He has always sugar coated his love in the form of money and lavish freebies. He still tries to do so. Anupama had rightly said that once parent's try to bribe children with money or expegufts they would value each relationship in a materialistic manner.

Vanraj has always been an idol to Toshu and Pakhi. They had always looked down on Anupama. Now Toshu seems to have accepted the bitter truth of his father. Pakhi is still in the queue to learn her lessons !

But to Samar he was always biased only coz Samar respected Anu more than him.

He never liked Samar and always thinks that Samar will fall at his feet and ask for HIS HELP one day, that will boost his ego to no bounds.

Using the word Nachaniya for his son, makes clear how he values his kids based on their helplessness to get used to his money.

Anupama is responsible for not speaking or taking a stand for herself these many years. That's coz she was never earning, never saw the outside world, took Vanraj's fake love drama at face value and trusted people blindly. Now she is standing up for herself and thats the real woman we wanted to see.

The show is going backwards

Kinjal will now do all house chores and study ??? What does Toshu,Samar and Pakhi do all day ? I see Pakhi on her cell phone more than anything else ?

With all these members they can’t divide house chores

Rest of family members do what exactly?

Anu is going to work , support the family and do all housework

What terrible regressive shit they keep showing

We want to see a woman gain independence...we don’t want to see a superhero

Originally posted by: -Anayah-

I don't think Anupama learned anything from the Vanraj cheating fiasco at all.

All I am seeing Anupama is being selfish, ignorant and egoistic person tbh. She lacks empathy, self respect and basic semblance of the situation. She is a terrible mother. Let me explain..

So she is thinking she can make Kinjal stay with "Love". Sorry but love isn't something you can chain people with, din't she learn that from whatever happened between her and her husband. All the love she showered on him was basically nothing to him because we as humans don't only need love.

She is selfish because she is only thinking about Toshu's happiness but not Kinjal's well being at all. You think some rich girl can manage into a middle class household? especially her being OTT happy and trying to do all that kitchen drama and all. I would have been assured if she took a stand when Baa was taunting at Kinjal, but she goes and tries to normalize it. Doormat 2.0 in the making, but don't think Kinjal can take it for long.. for one, she isn't Anupama from a poor family to put up with that shit and she is infact educated and get on her feet. If Baa continues her behaviour and Anupama - Toshu doesn't really take a stand for her, she will leave. That being said, I can also see Baa favouring Toshu over Kinjal and doing the Vanraj- anupama thing all over again.

She is ignorant with her limited world view, not everything is about family and her priorities are not everyone's priorities. She doesn't understand her limits when imposing her views on others, like she emotionally manipulated Rakhi to accept Toshu-Kinjal relationship, by scaring her about their elopement and how her only daughter might abandon her.

She is egoistic about her ability to manage relationships, earlier it was husband and wife one, now it is able to keep Kinjal at her home and change Rakhi's mind into accepting them. Relationships don't work like that, It was so toxic that she was trying to make Rakhi accept this new relationship.

Anupama lacks empathy - Not once did she feel remorse or sadness over Rakhi's situation that her only daughter - only child was not only against her, hate her and think she is some manipulative bit*h who is always plotting but had the gall to stop her slap because she is now Kinjal's MIL. So, If you marry someone, your relationship with your parents become NIL or what??

I do think slapping Kinjal is not right, but who gave Anupama any right to basically throw Rakhi's rights as a mother over Kinjal just like that?

She doesn't have any idea about how life works, only because it fits your fancy fairyland view, doesn't mean it is good for others too.

Anupama lacks Self Respect, Oh god at times I felt she was some leech. Anupama can learn a thing or two from Arundhati (Marathi counterpart of Anupama), Arundhati did grovel around for her son's marriage and all but the moment it came onto her husband and her family and its values, she herself broke the alliance and Abhishek (Marathi Toshu) was heartbroken but SO MATURE ABOUT IT and accepted the decision.

Anupama is a terrible terrible mother who only mollycoddled her children and we can see that in Toshu, Samar and Pakhi. Toshu and Pakhi cannot take no as an answer, they just have to have it or they will throw a tantrum. Samar is better in this department, but his mom worship is not letting him see Anupama's flaws.

at the end, I would like to say in the last few days I felt if Anupama's family needed some light, she wouldn't think for a second to burn down the neighbourhood, as long as HER family is happy right? 🤪

Extra Note Added:

Feel free to disagree, you are entitled to your opinion and I am to mine.

And I am a regular watcher of the show also watch the Marathi version. Marathi one is more fleshed out and Character development is so good there. You are able to understand what characters do what they did. It is very realistic and Arundhati isn't a crybaby beating the drum about how she has the super power being a mom and home maker. Anupama is always crying and her actions at times baffle me.

Her son literally eloped with a girl and she is estatic about being a MIL and how great she will manage that, not about the mess they created in Rakhi's life. You cannot expect your life is all flowery, after destroying others. So instead of giving pep talk about marriage and all, I think it would be practical of her to talk to them about responsibilities and about getting a job. that said whatever Pakhi is learning for this all LOL. Remember her saying if my brothers and dad's female friends can come home, why not my male friend? what example are they setting as a family???

I just called her selfish because she wants HER family to be happy, her children to be happy and get whatever they want etc. About Kinjal, let's see how the story proceeds. Don't think any sane girl can take insults like "If the sweets from her mom are poisoned" and "her grand MIL calling her mom snake and taking her under her control etc etc"

Totally agree with you. I'm tired of Anupama's so called Mahanta/ sanskar being glorified and Rakhi's practical nature being vilified🤢

Why does she want to make kinjal like her. Does she want her to suffer like she did.

She told rakhi that beti's and bahu's are given respect in that house!!!! That was a big fat lie. Her husband literally cheated on her and only 2 people in the house is on her side. The rest are taunting anu for Vee's mistakes🤢

Is that what she calls respect and love. What anu got from the family was worse than a slap. Kinjal definitely deserved a slap for ruining her life on that stupid guy. Bobody needs be politically correct all the time.😒

Anu wants everyone to be like her. Her life revolves around her children’s happiness and she expects others to sacrifice(Kinjal,Rakhi) for her children too, what kind of selfishness is this🤢

She didn’t teach pakhi what is wrong and what is right because she wanted Pakhi to be Happy! What kind of stupidity is this.

Doesn’t she realize how toxic her family is. No one can be happy around that Vee and his Baa.

Reply for Silvermoonlight: (using phone so cannot really quote)

Exactly! They are trying to make a superhero out of her. I was baffled when they kicked out Vanraj and she said she can run the house.

I mean How? She never worked, barely educated and how did she take it upon herself to run a household?

The impracticality of this character is mindblowing. It makes sense in the Marathi show, because Elder son Abhi is already practicing as a Doctor, not earning much but he is still working and he can work under some doctor to start earning right away.

Second son Yash, already does random music composition projects and earns money. Hell, he even bought his mom a veena because Aniruddha broke her dad's gifted veena (Anupama has ghoonguru)

All in all, I don't like this attitude of taking more than you can bite of Anupama. Be realistic.

Originally posted by: Annie_13

Totally agree with you. I'm tired of Anupama's so called Mahanta/ sanskar being glorified and Rakhi's practical nature being vilified🤢

Why does she want to make kinjal like her. Does she want her to suffer like she did.

She told rakhi that beti's and bahu's are given respect in that house!!!! That was a big fat lie. Her husband literally cheated on her and only 2 people in the house is on her side. The rest are taunting anu for Vee's mistakes🤢

Is that what she calls respect and love. What anu got from the family was worse than a slap. Kinjal definitely deserved a slap for ruining her life on that stupid guy. Bobody needs be politically correct all the time.😒

Anu wants everyone to be like her. Her life revolves around her children’s happiness and she expects others to sacrifice(Kinjal,Rakhi) for her children too, what kind of selfishness is this🤢

She didn’t teach pakhi what is wrong and what is right because she wanted Pakhi to be Happy! What kind of stupidity is this.

Doesn’t she realize how toxic her family is. No one can be happy around that Vee and his Baa.

I know right! I can only imagine Rakhi's pain imagining Kinjal reduced to Anupama 2.0

Haha yes that is exactly why I felt she was selfish.. she want her family's happiness at expense of others. Toshu is immature and I can totally see him to turn into Vanraj 2.0 because he is entitled and spoiled as hell.

Kinjal is naive.. like very naive. She fails to see what her mom is trying to say. She kinda also holds a grudge against her own mom because she wasn't around much due to professional commitments and she loves how Anupama is always there. She has this craving for motherly love and a big family, but she definitely chose a wrong family 🤣

Here are some things I can see that can happen!

1. Pakhi lashing out on Kinjal and asking her to stay away because Anu is her mom.

2. Baa taunting will definitely cause a lot of issues.

3. With Vanraj's job gone, How will they manage marriage expenses lol

4. Kinjal spending too much on something throwing family budget out of the window and baa taunting her about it lol