It’s Gold Not Iron to Rust - My RagKor… an introspection of trust
Hi dearies
I am back….. but this topic was given to me by……………..ugh you all know and I was pondering about it for quite sometime as its like holding a bubble… I want to enjoy and don’t want to break it… its brittle..
So is trust…. Trust takes time to form but once formed it cannot be assumed wrong to be broken. Sometimes its destiny that we trust someone who should not be, though we know they are not trustworthy, but destiny drive us to trust the unworthy to untrust the worthy!
I am treading on something like this…. trying to introspect as a normal human being....
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The marathoner / Coach was called by the National Coach Association to participate in a one day seminar in Lucknow… she refused initially but then the Lion asked her to go ahead as it was for a day and also suggested her to visit BhuKa too as its been long since she visited AZ. He said he will come to pick her up from AZ so that he can also check upon the developments and also meet the AO.
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Lucknow………..
She was going through so many memories…. After facing hervdemons (thanks to her Rowdy) she did not have fears but indeed she had nostalgia with tears blobbing. The Sun was on her face during her car travel…..bringing all the memories associated with that place….
The bus journey and then the poison, he sacrificed himself and I saved him only to loose him forever?…. she cried…., MY Suraj……………… she shuddered as the blast came in front of her eyes…..incessant tears…
She remembered the incident of the evil sister whom she tried to protect… who ran away leaving her in the Lucknow hotel.
The travel with Inspector Ajay. Ajay sudden thought…He proposed and how Suraj was angry about it…. but a good friend… where is he now??? Hmmm time had goneahead so fast…
She was going through the agenda when she read a speaker from Benaras………………. Benaras her whole body shuddered………….. Ranvijay…. The way Imli twisted and churned that the she got married to RV and was preg…. She could not even complete her thoughts, and inspite of all the treacherous backstabbing still she gave her a life only to be completely thwarted by playing dirty with Saanvi for seven years to be away with a brutal blame on her….but why was she not trusted by her Suraj…..
She teared… why am I thinking all this…. As Raaghav said I should not think as it brings only pain..but… how did he think that I would have married another guy and nonetheless how did I even think that My Suraj will even try to do harm to me…did we both lack in our trust? The one who gave his life for me, would he be behind my life??
But the sight of him with the gun at the durga pandal made me think he was trying to harm me and he was the one who made me believe that he was the reason for the untruthful one’s pregnancy by swearing on me…
She teared …..he blamed me for the horrendous happening with Saanvi and pushed me out of his life…. Is a child only the bonding for a marriage???? Mixed emotions, thoughts…. to top it all….. he even thought that I was raising false alarm about Imli and felt insecure about being friendly with Vivaan…but it cringed her heart as she thought of how he hurt his hand too.
She wanted to brush aside everything…. but Lucknow and the associated happenings dazed her brain….
In going through all….for one she realized that all her life perils was due to trusting the untrustworthy but that could her Suraj have trusted her more….
The eagle never thought about this but the place Lucknow brought out the otherwise vulnerable birdie side who as a normal humanbeing when being alone was doing an introspection of trust…..
In all this her heart shuddered and cringed at the thought of the way her Suraj, her protector was made to vanish in thin air… out of her life…to save her as he felt his life was her gift and promised her to live even after he left only for their daughter who too failed to trust or understand her mother for long.
Her heart and head was feeling heavy….
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The seminar went well, she went to meet BhuKa, and luckily that made her get over her otherwise heavy mind and heart….
AZ development was making her feel happy and she was at the Daak Baba…..
She was waiting for her Rowdy ……………………..Raaghav please come fast…
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The Rover was raging …… he met an officer on way….. the police Officer’s jeep was punctured midway. He was indeed smart.
The Rover stopped seeing the jeep and got down to offer help….
Inspector Saab!!! Can I help you... looks like your jeep is…..
Hey!!! Suraj…Suraj Rajvanshi how are you. And you here?…quick shoot of questions. Long time dude… How is Madam Chakor… Arey what you are looking so lost…. Don’t remember me?? Still angry about it?
He extended his hands… Inspector Ajay Khurana…
Oh!!! He smiled… extending his hands… Raaghav Kumar…. Ajay was shocked!!!
What??? Changed your name kya…
He said no, but yes I look like Suraj Rajvanshi and indeed Chakor is my wife…
Ajay was just perplexed. What? but how…. After AZ I was posted down South and then went on deputation to Andaman for long only now got back to Sitapur again… but …
Raaghav briefed him about Dude blast, the way he was brought, and everything briefly. Ajay was dumb… said you are lucky as I too loved her but it did not work out….something was turning him a bit J too … Maybe if I had been around I would have got to sail with her… after all we were good friends too and am well educated….You were lucky as you resembled Suraj.
Raaghav just smiled and drove…. Nothing he spoke nor uttered a word…. He dropped Ajay at Sitapur…
Raaghav ….. Ajay called him… Can I have Madam Chakor’s number…. He gave him.
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Raaghav called Chakor when her phone was engaged stating she was on another call.
He saw a bastiwala who was old and who knew Chakor from her young age. Arey kaaka please get in he said. He saw Ajay and said is that Inspector Ajay? Haan Raaghav said.
Hmm he was a good inspector and Chakor bitiya too was very friendly with him. She infact stopped his transfer too. His havildar was my cousin and I heard Ajay infact loved Chakor too hmm.
He was just talking about the old days, saying how Vivaan and Chakor were in love and to marry but because of Suraj’s swap, things turned ugly…. but then Suraj became so pure and turned so white. He thanked and applauded Raaghav for all the developments in place of the departed soul.
Raaghav smiled again called Chakor whose phone was still engaged.
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Dropping kaaka, he drove to BhuKa’s house when he saw Chakor speaking on the phone in front of Daak Baaba.
She was happy talking and was very excited.
Raaghav met BhuKa, enquired about their good health and things, went, and sat on the coir cot.
She came completing the call to him. Sorry Raaghav was on a call. Surprisingly it is an old friend. She spoke excitingly saying he is an Inspector, he had helped her so much, and infact she was thinking about him that morning.
She did not tell him that it was Ajay nor that he did propose her as she did not want to bring out any ill feelings as she was reminiscing her thoughts of that morning…
He smiled and asked can we start… hmmmm getting into the Rover, but Raaghav she said… I am surprised as how did he get my number. I forgot to ask him that…
Didn’t he say that? he asked… who? she asked. Your friend Inspector Ajay? No …she said… and we were so lost in talking all old stuff… Her eyes scrunched suddenly but… how did you know it is Ajay? Did you meet him??
He said yes I gave him a lift and shared your number.
What did he tell you? she asked… she got reminisced about how Suraj felt angry about Ajay and also her being friendly with Vivaan during the Mission Finding Imli….
He narrated the conversation with Ajay exactly as it is and told her without any emotions with a smile that he also shared that he loved her and felt that if he was around he would have maybe sailed with her as he was educated too.
She looked into his eyes…. No shade of insecurity or anger or upsetness..
Are you angry or upset? she asked.
He said angry? upset? Why?
I did not tell you that Ajay….she gulped as she had been bitten many times with lack of trust that she was agonizing…
He stopped the Rover turned towards her looking straight into her eyes… Chakor…. I love you and have loved you over ten years being away from you and do you think I will give any dam to those who talk about your past…
She teared… you trust me so much….
He said you trusted a Rowdy for your daughter…. You trusted a Rowdy with your life and you trusted a Rowdy with his promise to live with you and die with you.….. I don’t bother or worry about the trust of your past as it may have been due to trusting the untrustworthy that you were destined to perils but, my trust in you is Gold which will shine more through any fire and not Iron to be rusted with such waters.
Unknowingly they were near Sitapur police station. She called Ajay and said thank you for speaking to my husband Raaghav … when Raaghav took the phone and said… Inspector Ajay please do visit Shimla to see our beautiful two cubs and two roses…..
There was silence on the other end, indeed Ajay felt bad for not mentioning his meeting with her Lion, and that he got her number from Raaghav.
The Rover carried the Lion and his Eagle hand in hand while she was resting her head on his strong shoulders..
Birdie what are you thinking he asked ………….Rowdy how about a demo on Trust she winked when his eyes grew wide….! Well anytime Rowdy is ready he said!!! Raging his Rover.
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Everyone of us when we think through we will introspect many of our actions, feelings which may bring out a bit of pain...............but that's what life is about
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
