new FF (the child of love) - Page 16

Varun takes his wife home ... the night is fell ... Sana comes in this apartment for the second time everything is as before Varun has not changed anything  he wanted to keep his memories  such that they are ... he told her that he had bought this apartment for him and his wife he wanted to see her shadow  stay in his place  and today this shadow is real ... today she is his wife ... Sana trembles she is afraid of what will happen there are years that Varun has not touched her.. he detects her stress he wanted to reassure her  but don't know how.. he always thinks that she did not love him  and that marriage is just for her son.. but he know he loves her and he wants her he will not let this occasion go with the wind ... he holds her hand advanced towards the living room and asked her to sit on the couch he said

-: I know that today  we are married for our son ... but I want it to be real ... because it's real  you're my wife  but if you feel uncomfortable today I understand ... it is not easy  to find ourselves in this one place after years of separation ... you can sleep in the room  I'll use the sofa to sleep

-: No Varun we took this decision both we are Married now we can begin this life today

-: Are you sure ... he asked with a smile ... she answers him yes ... he gives her a gift box  and adds... this is for you.

-: What is this ... she asked.

-: It is a sari ... I bought it for you ... I want you to wear it for this occasion

she enters the bathroom  opens the box  takes the sari between her hands  looks at it a moment  then she thinks "why he gives me this sari what he wants to prove to me.. that he loves me? or maybe he just wants to take advantage of these moments before leaving me again ... I must not think too much about that ... I should not trust him ... I have a mission I have to finish it for my son ... today I am his wife and he has the right to do what he wants "

Sana  wears her sari  out of the bathroom  walking slowly... Varun looks at her the eyes fixed on her there's a long time he has not seen her beauty  his  eyes are  wet  he wants that happiness be real  he hoped that this moment be shared and that she  want him  as he wanted her... he walks toward her took his hand in hers  and advance with her towards the bedroom  Sana follows him her breathing exceeds her slowly steps before putting her on his bed  Varun puts her against him  his hand holding her head and whispers

-: I hear your stress in your breath ... calm down ... trust me and all will be well

he looks at her again and asks her to move with him ... he asks her to lie on the bed and he lies down next to her ... he starts to kiss her.. Varun does not deprive his desire ... he took advantage of his desire  it did not annoys  him that she does not reacted to his kiss and caresses.. he know why she is like that ... he thinks she don't love him  as before  since it was she who left him  but he thinks to regain this lost love  in offering her again... Sana is as eager as himself ... this body which landed on her  lack a lot ... she wants to hugs him against her and enjoy his warmth  and dive with him  but she don't follows him  because it is he who left her  when he got what he wanted  the first time ... this assumption will not leave her mind she thinks  he benefits from this marriage to take what he wants  and let her when he's had enough of her ... she remains without reaction just put her hands on the back of her husband to make him feel her presence allowing him to live this intense moment ... this honeymoon was tough but full of love Varun could give his wife the sincere feeling he has for her ... after this flies in the sky  Sana turns on the other side  the tears in her eyes she is not crying  for what she has to share with him  but she is crying to not prevent herself to believe this lie  and this misunderstanding  which does not leave her mind .. she cries  because she believes that Varun  uses her for his desires  and she cannot be against .. she needed him to save her son ... she wants to be like him  enjoy these moments to satisfy her desire.. but she can not ... she can't lie even to herself  and think  that this life will last forever ... she cries he hears the sigh of her tears... after having took a breath he puts his hand on her shoulder and asks her

-: What happen Sana... why you are crying

-: Nothing ... she wipes her tears to hide her sorrow... he asks her to turn

-: Sana looks at me and tell me ... you regret? you think that you will not have done that

-: No it is not that it's Sohail  I miss him it's the first time that I don't sleep with him

Varun feels she lies to him ... Sana is not telling the truth ... he knows that it is not the lack of her son  that makes her sad ... he feels she regretted and she does not want that he approaches her ... he wonders if he has not made a mistake by marrying her by that way ... his anger rises  and he says

-: And now you find yourself forced to sleep here with me ... you don't support my presence ... you don't like when I touch you... you prefer sleeping with your son ... you got what you wanted  now my presence bothers you ... he takes his shirt that he had withdrawn  and leaves the room

even if he had the most beautiful time with her.. Varun does not support that Sana ignores  him... he has a feeling that she feels the disgust  to be with him ... and it makes him sad  he does not understand why... he thought change the history. but the past is housed with them in this apartment ... he prefers to go out  and not stay with her in the same room  for don't get angry  and elevate his voice in front of her...but  Sana does not want to see him like that she did not want annoy him she loves him anyway... even if he has hurt her in the past even if she is convinced that she will separate with him later... she regrets and wants these some times she will pass with him will be a beautiful memory that she will never regret... she rises  from her bed and goes rejoin him  in the living room she found him sitting his eyes shining thoughtful... she approaches him sits on the ground at his feet and said

-: sorry Varun I did not  mean to make you angry

-: I know you have accepted this marriage  for a good reason ... but this relationship cannot be done without feelings ... I feel you far and I know why ... it's me who have pushed you to this marriage  but I don't support that you rejected me ... I cannot tolerate that you feel forced doing what you don't want ... I'm a man Sana

-: I know Varun but the past disturbs me ... it dose not leave me quite

-: Forget what happened... he said looking into her eyes thinking she regrets to have leaving him ... leaves it behind you

-: Can be you have forgotten.. but how do you want me forget the... (she means the message that you sent me and that you have abandoned me without explanation but she said nothing  silent  she does not want to dig into this story which have tore her  heart

-: You cannot forget what ... he asks without knowing what she's talking ... tells me I want to know ... but she looks at him without saying anything  a silence that still annoys Varun

 -: You see? you don't want to talk !! I understood ... let me please  and go to sleep

-: I think our life is complicated with this marriage ... this is not what I wanted

-: Whatever you wanted you got it ... said Varun angry ... your only anxiety is to have a child... I hope you fall pregnant quickly... so I'll free myself from this jail life and from you

tears in her eyes Sana rises don't respond to these accusations leaves the living  room, and returns in the bedroom Varun's words  does not help her to regain the confidence to Varun and it shows her that Varun is obliged to live this life that he does not like and who wants to get rid very soon

the misunderstanding is spread more... since neither of them is decided to tell his secret and everyone both  in the message that they received is a lie ... that each of them believes that it's the reality ... Sana leaves Varun on the couch where he spent the rest of his wedding night thinking  how it began with a nice feeling of love and desire. and how it ended by this dispute ... he thinks about what he said and he regrets... he finds that his words were too hard "I hope you fall pregnant Quickly ... so I'll free myself from this jail life and from you" it sounds in his ear like an alarm siren "I would not say this... it's not what I wanted ... I don't want her to think that I don't want her... I have to repair this mistake I will present my excuse "he enters the room approaches the bed he wants to ask forgiveness and make her understand that he did not think what he said... she sleeps back to the door.. or can be  she let believe she sleeps  she heard him coming  but the tears in her eyes  prevents her to turn around  he remains standing for a moment  hearing  her breathing  then he goes out and closes the door