Blast from the Past Thread #25 ** Abducted Dreams ** p 129, ep 257 - Page 97

Episode 251 Maha

Defeated

The blinds open he awakes.  The room is still filled with an aura of gloom.  Khushi gets a phone call from Mr. Shukla and Arnav seems surprised his wife is making a way in the world without him?  She hands him a towel her eyes a downward gaze.  She has been defeated; she no longer fights for her rights to the bathroom. She has been subdued.  He doesn't like it... he feels the difference of a quiet and hurt Khushi.   She tells Mr. Shukla she will no longer be doing the catering service, Arnav turns at looks at her.  He doesn't like it one bit, this new Khushi, the circumstances have created...no, he has created. He goes into the bathroom and Khushi takes out the file recalling the terms of Shyam's blackmail.  The file falls as he is about to come out of the bathroom and Khushi quickly picks up the papers unknowingly leaving one under the bed.

He comes to sit on the bed, puts his shoes on and steps on the paper, which catches on his heel and comes out from the bed.  I was so excited that, maybe he would find out what was going on but nooo  Khushi snatches it up.

It is Khushi and Arnav downstairs.  You can cut the tension with a knife.  He comes down and she goes back up and meets Shyam who asking if she got the signatures yet, threateningly.  She says she will get them when she can.  She walks away.

I like this Khushi...she's a fighter.  But what about Arnav Khushi?  We will see.

Arnav is sitting at the table and can't stop thinking about Khushi.  He reprimands himself for letting Khushi abscond his mind with her thoughts.  He insists that her behavior and her words mean nothing to him and can't have an affect on him.  He goes to drink his tea and can't, he keeps thinking, he doesn't want to hear her voice nor does he want to hear an explanation from her.  Why does her existence trouble him so much?  Why is he thinking about her so much?

Why, dammit?

He leaves his tea, puts on his coat and leaves. For a man who wants nothing to do with his wife he sure thinks about her a lot.

Shyam is in a state of frustration.  Khushi must take his signature.

Khushi is dismayed by the whole situation, recalls what happened at Arnav's office.  She must have him believe her and his signature on the documents is the only way.  Shyam has totally blackmailed and convinced the distraught Khushi. Shyam reminded Anjali about the mangoes drying outside so Anjali goes to get Khushi.  They leave her room the perfect planned opportunity for Shyam to exchange the real' papers with the fake will document.  He does this in the knick of time.

Khushi comes back is wondering how she will get Arnav's signature when she overhears Akash talking on the phone to Aman about obtaining Arnav's signatures on some papers.  She asks him if she wants her to get it done and he hands over the papers telling her to have him sign on every page.

A tortured man is trying to work at poolside his place of solace and peace but that's not happening.  He can't stop thinking about Khushi she creeps into his thoughts at every moment. He remembers when she placed tika on his forehead as he gazed into her big hazel eyes mesmerized and her uninhibited dancing while oblivious on bhang...he slams the computer top down maybe that will make him forget her!  And as he lifts up his head their eyes meet and as he looks at her he takes a deep breath her scent so comforting and then realizing he says to her, "What?"

She hesitantly says these papers have to be signed.

"What papers?"

"Akash, needs these papers signed," and she hands him the file.  He grabs them from her and asks her why she has them.  She explains Akash was getting late and on a phone call. 

And he signs them, no questions asked.  I'm not sure if it is that he trusts his brother or he trusts his wife at this point.  He tells her he understands what she is doing removing all her belongings from the room and making it like it was.  

He doesn't care.

She says she didn't do it intentionally for his benefit but he is under a misconception. Hallelulia!!! 

Finally she says something. 

He hands her back the signed file...saying whatever.

Khushi brings Akash the sign papers.  "Perfect. Thanks Khushi."

Khushi holds the file close to her bosom, close to her heart and runs up the stairs.  She takes pictures of the signed papers and then wraps them in a plastic bag and hides them in a pot full of dirt.  She will not give them to Shyam unless he tells the truth to Arnav and then she will tell Arnav about the papers.  She will not let Shyam deceive Arnav or herself again. Now that's the fighter I know!

Hmm, some good thinking on her part.

Shyam comes into her room.  Khushi's eyes go wide.  This Shyam has such nerve!  He closes the door and asks her for the papers.  Khushi ignores him and finally she says to him that under the terms of the conditions he tells Arnav the truth and then she will give him the signed papers.  Khushi has the upper hand right now.  She won't give those papers to him until he speaks with Arnav.  He doesn't believe she has done the job so she shows him the picture of the signed papers on her phone.  He verifies it and she says he should tell the truth to Arnav this evening when he gets home.  Shyam says to her at home, when everybody is here like his pregnant wife and elderly Naniji?  Ok Khushi understands so call him.  Shyam is looking around the room here and there and Khushi notices and says she is not a fool he will not find the papers and that is the reason why he loves her.

Khushi tries to contact Arnav but he keeps cutting the call.  She continues on her mobile and the house phone and he won't pick up.  He is in the car driving and pleads Khushi to stop calling.  It's almost like the last straw and he is teetering on the edge of breaking.  Anjali sees a worried Khushi and tells her what is going on with Arnav because obviously she doesn't know. 

Anjali tells her it is their mother's birthday tomorrow, she would have been 56 (a little too close to home for me)  and she explains all the things they did such as going to the orphanage, giving alms and clothes and then to the temple.  Arnav never took part he always wanted to be alone.  Khushi asks wouldn't it be best for him to be with family?  Anjali agrees. And she says he shares everything but his pain and this pain never would he ever share it.  Then she breaks the news that Arnav is going to London today in three hours and Khushi's eyes go wide, he never even told her. 

Khushi is even surer now that even if he is in pain she must tell him the truth.  He must know her truth before he leaves for London.  She grabs her wallet and runs to meet him.  She must convince him of her truth.

Shyam is going crazy looking for the papers and dismantles Arnav's room.

On the way to the airport she insists that Shyam meets her to tell Arnav the truth or he won't get the papers.

He is still searching the room when he hears Anjali coming.  Straightening the room quickly, as Anjali walks to the room she is thinking she should be with Khushi she must feel bad that he left without telling her.  I so wanted Shyam to get caught! She enters the room and Shyam tells her he was looking for a file.  She wants to call Chote but is distracted by Hari Praksh and Shyam is saved again.  I honestly did not pay much attention to this part because I despise him so.

Khushi is frantically awaiting her auto ride to complete at the airport.  She jumps out hands the driver the money and goes without receiving her change.

Slowy but steadily Arnav is in line to go into the airport.  He gives his entry ticket and sojourns in, London waiting, with a forlorn look on his face.  Not only is the next day his mother's birthday but he is leaving with things so unsettled with his wife.  He has so much distrust in his heart, such confusion between love and hate and he wants to believe her but he just can't.  The frantic Khushi must see him and speak to him, her eyes full of worry and fear that she won't get to him on time.  She is compelled as she pushes and weaves in and out between other passengers to get to the front of the line.  The security officer asks for her entry ticket and tells her where to go to get one.  She races out and goes to the window and finds her wallet empty, unable to purchase a ticket she left the change behind at the auto driver.  She runs back just hoping she will see Arnav and maybe they will make an exception...but he won't and she whispers his name,

"Arnavji..."

And he hears her, turning around, a gust of wind, a familiar romantic lullaby Rabba Ve is heard in the BG, he sees his Khushi, hands on the glass eyes brimmed with tears.  His heart stops, his lip slightly elevates just a hint of a smile, a relief she is here and she opens her mouth breaking the spell,

"Arnavji, I must talk to you, just one minute I must tell you something."  His face changes into the mask of no emotion, ah yes he remembers now,he doesn't want to hear it.  He turns to leave and she dials his phone, he dismisses the call as he is looking at her tear stained face. The doors of the airport and his heart close on her once again. But Khushi is fighting for her life, for her man and their relationship, her pride, her family, her honor, her morals; she calls again and he places the phone up to his ear and she frantically rattles what she wants to say but mentions Shyam's name and within the instant the phone is removed from his ear like it is on fire and CLICK...DISCONNECT. Disconnect from his heart and brain.  He doesn't want to hear it and especially anything about that snake jijaji.  Khushi in desperation repeats over and over as she is banging on the window,
"Arnavji, listen to me, one minute, listen to me, one minute!"

MY HEART IS WRENCHING, MY STOMACH CLENCHING IN PAIN FOR THESE TWO. 

Sure I know he is leaving to film a movie, I know he has to go for 40 odd days and I am damn frustrated too, but leaving this way?  My heart can't take it.  I feel awful for Khushi and her pain and for him for losing the opportunity to be happy in his relationship... trusting his wife, but alas not to be.

She tries to bypass the guard as she yells out for him but is held back as Arnavji walks away.  Her shoulders lift and as she lets her last breath out, for that is how it feels, in all her despair she watches him walk away.  He walks as if all the weight of the world is on his shoulders and slightly turns his head over his shoulder for a last glance of her but doesn't. 

She is calling to him not by words but by heart and he is straining to listen.

Standing outside of the airport Khushi tries to recover, head down, sniffling and she looks up and standing before her is her husband.  Her eyes go wide.  Thank Devi Maiiya!

"You didn't leave.  You stayed back?" she asks him.

He barks back, " You made me!" Hmm, compulsion?  He has no words, seems a bit tongue-tied, frustratingly a small shake of his head.  "Why are you doing this?" And she just lets it flow, "How could you think this? How could you leave like this? Why would you think of Shyam with me?"  Just at the very mention of his brother-in-laws name he closes his eyes, steam escaping from his ears.  "I don't want to hear this," through gritted teeth. 

It must kill him inside thinking of his love in the arms of another man.  Kills him.  Can't even think about it, it repulses him so much.

She grabs his passport and ticket.  She begs him to stay one more minute to prove her innocence; someone is coming.  She calls asking where is he?  He is on his way..it's going to take some time.  Shyam time...snakewa.  The truth will be revealed, she says.  He tries to reach for the passport and she begs him just a little more time, hiding it.  Here comes ASR, he steps forward, grabs her by the arm and then snatches the passport away from her. It's time for his flight.  She is begging him please and she tells him she can't stand that he thinks about her this way, she can't stand it and he counters with it is I who can't stand it.  He swallows hard..so much said in those few words.  This is killing him just as much as it is she.  He leaves.

She is devastated.  Standing there all alone feeling defeated.  He thinks so poorly of her; she can't take it.

And then there he is again, standing in front of her giving her 10 minutes to prove herself innocent after that he's gone.  He wants this!!!  She shakes her head, a cloud of hope in the air, and she makes a call.  It's going to take time, Shyam says as his auto has pulled up across the street. Snakewa!

Travelers are rushing pass Khushi to go inside airport and jostling her about when he steps forward and cages her in with his arms and body.  Up close and personal, protecting her from outside forces.  Seems like he cares about his wife and it was quite touching to watch this hurt, angry man caring so much.  Her bloodshot eyes gaze into his, as he is now the object of everyone's bumps.  Yes, he cares Khushi, don't feel defeated.  She quietly says to him with tear filled eyes she knows why she is leaving today if he only stays back...He interrupts her with three minutes left.  A little uncomfortable and vulnerable perhaps this too much right now, he doesn't want to deal with it all.

"Flight 0B359 for London..."it's time, too late.  The 10 minutes are over, you asked and I gave and it's done.  I am leaving.

One more minute, one minute she goes to call and he yells Stop it Khushi, stop it now!"  No one will come.  He only waited, he holds his breath gaining strength to tell her the truth.  He wanted her to prove her innocence!  He hoped for her not to be in the wrong!  He has told her this truth.  He cares for her!

Now tell me the truth Khushi no one was coming right he asks her and her tears come again.  Yeah, right he says.

He starts to walk away she grabs him buy the shoulder begging for him to listen to the truth.  He asks her why as he brushes her hand off his shoulder.

Oh these two, what a pair. They both want to tell each other truths but both not really listening and saying anything.

"Why, Khushi?"

She answers, "Why? Because it makes a difference because it is you, I wouldn't care if it was anybody else but you...if you go away like this I won't be able to breathe..."

Looking into those tear filled eyes he wants so much to believe her, he almost does.  You can see his yearning for her but his spell has been broken by an announcement calling for him to come to the gate.  Oh! Those eyes say so much and so little when need be...he turns to leave her and she grabs hold of his, hand.

She begs him don't go and he takes her hand away but Khushi holds tight until her fingers can't grasp his hands anymore.  Your going she asks him and he says yes he is going and walks away.  She runs after him and is held back by the guards and he walks forward to his gate to catch his flight. And there she stands holding the glass watching him leave, tears rolling down and feeling defeated. 

Every step he takes is a remembrance of their most intimate moments (teri meri dance, Diwali moments, hospital hug, payal return, tangled fairy lights, holi confession, Khushi's bed as she held his neck shirt so tight and his Ranjha speech) of all the moments he supported her. He never let her feel defeated. He was always there. 

He stops and wonders why is it so hard to leave her? 

He turns, as if to go back to her and is stopped by a tap on his shoulder.

"Mr. Arnav Singh Raizada?"

 "Yes..."

Outside the plane lifts off and she watches grief stricken,

Meanwhile on board they are discussing the missing passenger.

Mr. Arnav Singh Raizada.

Defeated and Kidnapped?

Originally posted by: cinthiann1758

Episode 249

I Won't Deceive Him

Shyam wants Khushi to help him have Arnav sign some legal documents making some lame excuse.  But our Khushi is strong in her convictions and she knows he is a snake and doesn't trust him. 

It's good that Khushi didn't trust Shyam. But why she went to Shyam for help? How could she think that Arnav would believe that swindler! 

She tells him no she won't deceive her husband, she can't.  

He already believes that she is a home wrecker.

Shyam is stunned, what will he do?

Arnav has been distracted and irritable since coming home from the Gupta house.  Much unfolded there and much was revealed even though he didn't believe Khushi's truth.  But it IS on his mind, just maybe...maybe she is telling the truth, NO she is NOT ,Shyam even said how much the house was different without her in front of everyone.  

No she is not telling the truth...is she?

It must be hard wrestling in your mind with truth and non-truth, trust and distrust.  You become quite irritable and you don't want anything, not even your usual cup of coffee. 

well said. 

Everyone is noticing his behavior, Anjali worries he refused her offering of juice and Nani and Mami are equally concerned and their joking around at his expense causes him more frustration.  He slams down the laptop and leaves and Nani thinks that since he came home he has been upset. 

Manorama does her Mami thing and calls up Buaji to find out what happen.  She taunts Buaji but Buaji gives it right back and actually hangs up on her having the last word that Arnav misses their ginger tea compared to Shantivans black coffee.

Anjali notices a worried Khushi.  She asks if they had a good time at her parents' home and if Arnav was okay.  Khushi says they had fun. Anjali's gentle probing finally comes to the point and asks if they had been fighting. Anjali explains how it is common in new relationships to adjust and sometime fight.  Arnav has a hard time expressing his feelings and becomes irritable. 

Arnav comes he informs them he is going to the office and his button falls off.  He is going to change his shirt and Anjali finds this as a perfect opportunity for Arnav and Khushi to share an intimate moment together. 

They follow Arnav to his room and Anjali tells him not to change, Khushi is there to sew his button back on. 

You can cut the awkwardness and tension in the room.  They both are hurting although I think more Khushi then Arnav . 

Arnav was hurt, but he was kind of relieved to tell her the truth. But Khushi's pain was abysmal. 

He doesn't trust her.

She hands Khushi the sewing kit and Khushi takes it hesitantly.

 I see that this is an intimate act the sewing of a button on the husband's shirt by the wife on Indian TV, rather interesting to my western brain and considering I don't know how to sew a stitch; but it is true, it is a very intimate and a sensual act.  The intermingling of breaths, almost cheek to chin, the intimacy and closeness of the pair, very sweet in my opinion. 

So sweet and romantic right? 

She slowly and steadily sews his shirt button and her eyes fill with tears.  It must be hard to interact when your husband distrusts you.  She knows he doesn't want her to touch him; he despises her touch now that it is tainted. 

She thinks like that, but he actually longs for her touch. 

What must be going through her mind?

But then again what is in his?  

He looks at her with those big puppy dog eyes and I'm lost.  Questioning? Yearning?😆😆

When Di leaves he says to her she doesn't have to do the drama and he goes to walk away and she pricks her finger.  He jumps, "Khushi?"  

Yes, he does care and it's obvious by the quickness of his response to her pain.

The FB of all the pain and hurt he caused her on the bridge comes before our eyes and the slow Rabba Vey music plays in the background pulling on our heartstrings.

She tells him it's no drama but since the thread is already tied she might as well finish the job.

Why, Arnav, why can't you see the pain you are causing her?  

kiyu dard hai itna tere ishq main. can't he see the truth and love in her eyes.

I know you do, you stand still and let her complete the job and at the very end she comes so close to you with tears filling her eyes and you must ignore them, otherwise she will know that you just maybe leaning to believing her.  You want to so badly, don't you?

She must try to speak to him again.  

He places his tie and jacket on and walks out the door ignoring her.

Anjali comes in and asks now what happened. Khushi tries to cover up her feelings with a lie and Anjali sees right through it.

Shyam comes in and an atmosphere which is tense becomes even more so with his two sense.  He has seen BIL leave looking angry is everything okay?  He spurts out his opinion and you all know how I dislike him, so I am not listening to him at all, nananana.  He speaks to Khushi as if Anjali is not in the room but then includes her when she looks up at him.  He is so despicable. 

so true. But I wonder why so smart Anjali became so gullible!

 Abbas was brilliant as Shyam; he truly played a spectacular villain.

I will skip over the Bubli scene it is useless.😆

The next scene was the best.  Finally you have Khushi interrupting what looks like a very important meeting Arnav is having.The scene goes between Khushi's dialog and Arnav's," What the? How dare you? This is not acceptable."dialog. So we believe the conversation is taking place between the pair of star-crossed lovers.  But alas Nooo, a diabolical Shyam is sitting in Arnav's chair as Khushi has spilled the beans about him and ASR is in a meeting in the conference room reprimanding a security guard.  It was brilliant this scene but so disheartening too.  I wanted so badly for Arnav to hear Khushi's words and to see how much she trusts him and she is trustworthy.  I wanted Arnav to see Shyam's real face.

Same here. I always disliked Khushi's intrusion in Arnav's meeting. This time I was happy. But sigh it didn't happened. And i was so disgusted to see Shyam in Arnav's chair.

In my head I am hearing the sad Rabba Vey music in the background and the words said by a woman who truly loves her husband with her whole heart and soul saying, 

"I won't deceive Him",

I wish if he would've known what an angel she is! 

But beware, hisss...

The slithering snakewa Shyam says,

But I will...

 

Originally posted by: cinthiann1758

Episode 251 Maha

Defeated

Here are my latest analysis...😊

Originally posted by: cinthiann1758

Episode 251 Maha

Defeated

The blinds open he awakes.  The room is still filled with an aura of gloom.  Khushi gets a phone call from Mr. Shukla and Arnav seems surprised his wife is making a way in the world without him?  She hands him a towel her eyes a downward gaze.  She has been defeated; she no longer fights for her rights to the bathroom. She has been subdued.  He doesn't like it... he feels the difference of a quiet and hurt Khushi.   She tells Mr. Shukla she will no longer be doing the catering service, Arnav turns at looks at her.  He doesn't like it one bit, this new Khushi, the circumstances have created...no, he has created. He goes into the bathroom and Khushi takes out the file recalling the terms of Shyam's blackmail.  The file falls as he is about to come out of the bathroom and Khushi quickly picks up the papers unknowingly leaving one under the bed.

He comes to sit on the bed, puts his shoes on and steps on the paper, which catches on his heel and comes out from the bed.  I was so excited that, maybe he would find out what was going on but nooo  Khushi snatches it up.

It is Khushi and Arnav downstairs.  You can cut the tension with a knife.  He comes down and she goes back up and meets Shyam who asking if she got the signatures yet, threateningly.  She says she will get them when she can.  She walks away.

I like this Khushi...she's a fighter.  But what about Arnav Khushi?  We will see.

Arnav is sitting at the table and can't stop thinking about Khushi.  He reprimands himself for letting Khushi abscond his mind with her thoughts.  He insists that her behavior and her words mean nothing to him and can't have an affect on him.  He goes to drink his tea and can't, he keeps thinking, he doesn't want to hear her voice nor does he want to hear an explanation from her.  Why does her existence trouble him so much?  Why is he thinking about her so much?

Why, dammit?

He leaves his tea, puts on his coat and leaves. For a man who wants nothing to do with his wife he sure thinks about her a lot.

Shyam is in a state of frustration.  Khushi must take his signature.

Khushi is dismayed by the whole situation, recalls what happened at Arnav's office.  She must have him believe her and his signature on the documents is the only way.  Shyam has totally blackmailed and convinced the distraught Khushi. Shyam reminded Anjali about the mangoes drying outside so Anjali goes to get Khushi.  They leave her room the perfect planned opportunity for Shyam to exchange the real' papers with the fake will document.  He does this in the knick of time.

Khushi comes back is wondering how she will get Arnav's signature when she overhears Akash talking on the phone to Aman about obtaining Arnav's signatures on some papers.  She asks him if she wants her to get it done and he hands over the papers telling her to have him sign on every page.

A tortured man is trying to work at poolside his place of solace and peace but that's not happening.  He can't stop thinking about Khushi she creeps into his thoughts at every moment. He remembers when she placed tika on his forehead as he gazed into her big hazel eyes mesmerized and her uninhibited dancing while oblivious on bhang...he slams the computer top down maybe that will make him forget her!  And as he lifts up his head their eyes meet and as he looks at her he takes a deep breath her scent so comforting and then realizing he says to her, "What?"

She hesitantly says these papers have to be signed.

"What papers?"

"Akash, needs these papers signed," and she hands him the file.  He grabs them from her and asks her why she has them.  She explains Akash was getting late and on a phone call. 

And he signs them, no questions asked.  I'm not sure if it is that he trusts his brother or he trusts his wife at this point.  He tells her he understands what she is doing removing all her belongings from the room and making it like it was.  

He doesn't care.

She says she didn't do it intentionally for his benefit but he is under a misconception. Hallelulia!!! 

Finally she says something. 

He hands her back the signed file...saying whatever.

Khushi brings Akash the sign papers.  "Perfect. Thanks Khushi."

Khushi holds the file close to her bosom, close to her heart and runs up the stairs.  She takes pictures of the signed papers and then wraps them in a plastic bag and hides them in a pot full of dirt.  She will not give them to Shyam unless he tells the truth to Arnav and then she will tell Arnav about the papers.  She will not let Shyam deceive Arnav or herself again. Now that's the fighter I know!

Hmm, some good thinking on her part.

Shyam comes into her room.  Khushi's eyes go wide.  This Shyam has such nerve!  He closes the door and asks her for the papers.  Khushi ignores him and finally she says to him that under the terms of the conditions he tells Arnav the truth and then she will give him the signed papers.  Khushi has the upper hand right now.  She won't give those papers to him until he speaks with Arnav.  He doesn't believe she has done the job so she shows him the picture of the signed papers on her phone.  He verifies it and she says he should tell the truth to Arnav this evening when he gets home.  Shyam says to her at home, when everybody is here like his pregnant wife and elderly Naniji?  Ok Khushi understands so call him.  Shyam is looking around the room here and there and Khushi notices and says she is not a fool he will not find the papers and that is the reason why he loves her.

Khushi tries to contact Arnav but he keeps cutting the call.  She continues on her mobile and the house phone and he won't pick up.  He is in the car driving and pleads Khushi to stop calling.  It's almost like the last straw and he is teetering on the edge of breaking.  Anjali sees a worried Khushi and tells her what is going on with Arnav because obviously she doesn't know. 

To be cont'd

 

 

 

 

 

 

Originally posted by: kizh72

Wiwy & Indi Di, this is turning out to be a learning experience! Need to find some time to approach Baba Google for some wisdom on ashtanayikas ( something common across all classical dance forms in India, I think, irrespective of language or geography), proshitapatika et al! I've heard the word abhisarika used to mean a loose woman, something to do with all that uncontrollable passion?

Originally posted by: indi52

episode 251

khushi looked up and her eyes followed a plane as it took off. her head turned all the way to one side, a sadness terribly deep in her. as i watched an echo from the very first day we met them came back, a young woman, fresh, innocent, unmarked by this knowledge that she has today... looking up at a helicopter, another sky rider approaching. no idea her rajkumar is sitting inside. today, she knows who is in that large machine that defies gravity and wings her love away. she has been marked now, once and for all by love.

like bookends, the two scenes, between them the first book of a pyaar that is difficult to name. from not knowing to knowing we have come, what awaits us next. a clear sense of a whole phase coming to its end and a new one beginning... like an ocean's ebb and flow... the tide has turned, the ebbing starts, yet below the surface and tow, a pulling in, can anyone ever go away again?

251... a pain filled yet exhilarating long episode. this is the last day we shall see asr the way we are so used to seeing him, in a long time. the actor is going away on longish leave, but we have been assured he will return from time to time and shoot. we know he will be kidnapped... he is not in that plane. we also know that airport scene was not shot in an airport... it's a shopping mall.

we know many things. and we are tense... i was very very tense really. yet the actors reached effortlessly and unfalteringly in and touched hidden places, i felt my feelings soar.

baat aapki hai... kyun khushi se door jaane mein...

you are the sun, i am the moon, you are the words, i am the tune... play me. neil diamond from the seventies in a scene here suddenly.

 

Never heard the song,but sat perfectly..

 

a beautiful, startling shot of a very disturbed asr waking up as a dejected khushi opens the curtain to let sunlight in. ever since the bridge a sadness and longing wraps the two, a yawning distance between them. and in khushi now a simple realisation and an absolute need. he is hurting terribly about this whole shyam thing, he is in pain... she must convince him that it's not true, because even she can't live if he should think so badly of her.

the word love may not have been stated, but these two were lovers true. and of a kind that never felt hackneyed, never felt jaded, but always as alive and radiant as that sunlight. or darkly sparkling like a star wrapped night sky.

that shower of sunlight on his face, if only it were so easy to bring light... the veil of deceit was as thick as that curtain but not as easy to draw.

an awkwardness to the morning. where does one go from here... her voice signals things to him... he senses her, she senses him, somewhere in all the hate and nafrat, in all the i'll show you swami and harassing laad governor, in all the accusing and counter accusing, in all the rage and chhap gaya hai and everything that has transpired, somewhere since that very first day when a man opened his eyes and a girl shut hers, something indelible has taken root and grown and is now in place... phenk do, throw it away he had told her... but she couldn't... he had tried to turn and walk away, but he had had to turn around. palat.

"ji shukla ji..."

and a palat. he knows she is down, he even knows why to an extent, and he can't bear it. it bothers him.

she hands him his towel, head down and looking wan, and he remembers the squabbling and race for the bath just a couple of weeks ago, a smiling crazy sanka khushi. the girl he wants, the girl he adores. he even recalls, humney kaha uthiye na... swami. maybe he enjoyed that ragging by her, maybe he felt a bit tickled by her supreme madness?

missing. longing. needing.

quiet portrayals of it in looks, in eyes, and turn of head and a pace, like little paintings strewn across the wall, each shot of the two this difficult morning after. khushi knows she must make him sign the papers. he knows he will go away.

each and every shot between the two eloquent, layered and moving. little mattered that shaym and anjali scenes were somewhat flat and loud. perhaps they needed to be noisy as they had to claim our attention today if not our hearts. the lead is going away, the visual play is shifting, hear ye hear ye. there's a sensitivity among the creatives when doing the asr khushi scenes. so delicately handled, taking time over every emotion, every action. kyun dard ha itna like a clear brief through it all.

 

Their pain of separation portrayed in every frame.. they literally breathed only the other's thoughts

"n.nahin shukla ji ab humse yeh dabba service nahin hoga..." she can't do this dabba service any more. a khushi forlorn, so unlike herself.

another palat.

again a memory of a smiling girl... "tum kya kar rahi ho, khushi?" what are you doing, khushi? "arre aapko pata nahin, hum apna naya business..." oh you don't know i am starting my new business.

smiling happy loopy mad khushi... girl that makes his heart beat wildly, why is she so sad so down? why ... it does bother him..

the truth has taken its toll on both.

sanaya and barun for a moment as just asr and khushi... a man and a woman who are in each other, part of each other. connected.

she looked lovely in that pink... and he darkly gorgeous.

he sits down to eat and she is up to her pranks in his heart, throwing water on him, lecturing while walking on top of the bed... he is irritated he can't stop the thoughts. memories come of the fight on the terrace. and a girl snapping a thread with her teeth, her head resting almost on his chest... so close to him, his heartbeat...

"dammit!" there's only one thing to do, banish the thoughts. "main kyun uske baare mein soch raha hoon. mujhe faraq nahin padta... uski baato se, ya uski behaviour se... usski awaz bhi nahin sunna chahta main... na usski kisi baat ka explanation chahiye..."

why am i thinking of her. makes no difference to me... her words, her behaviour... don't want to hear her voice even... nor do i want her explanations.

"usska hona na hona mujhe itna pareshan kyun karta hai... kyun soch raha hoon main itna usske baare mein... why dammit!"

her being or not being around, why does it bother me so much... why am i thinking so much of her, why dammit!

this is an intelligent, articulate man. and this struggle to acknowledge and submit to a feeling is genuine and difficult to bear. he can see he is immersed in her thoughts. his dimag says he can't have feelings for a home breaker, his sister's husband's lover... but a part of him is rebellious. it doesn't listen to his head. it does its own thing. tormented is he by her thoughts... and he misses her smile. one day he will say as much... he will do anything to put that smile on those lips. the first time he had seen her, they had registered before all else.

 

beautiful delve into his head

at the poolside he sits, looking stunning in jacket and that trademark distracted air. 👏

he sighs, memories plague him.. khushi is drunk at diwali...dancing... beguiling... feelings well up again. the entire day today, knowing full well that he leaves soon, and perhaps even more vulnerable because it's his mother's birthday the next day, he thinks of khushi and nothing but her. she is embedded in his being now. is it really possible to leave any more?

he bangs shut the computer and looks up. there is the real girl right before him.

he yells at her for no reason. maybe needs to talk, needs to try and be in control... i want you to understand mujhe in cheezon se koi faraq nahin padta..

a little later in the day. in the meantime, shyam has switched papers, she has had them signed, hidden and photographed them, and shyam has made a disgusting declaration of love, creeping everything, i bet even the fly on the wall, out. shyam's dialogues were so well crafted, raunchy, base, sickening, but wrapped in shuddh hindi, with plenty "aap" and pseudo courtesy. while the man she wants only says blatant, in your face "tum" and doesn't seem to care about the purity of language, as long as it says what he wants to and the way he wants to, dammit... what the... tum kya kar rahi ho... faraq nahin padta. and she does thrill to it all. baat aapki hai.

she calls him, he ignores the call.

the phone as a prop to convey intense despair... so well used. and kind of real. the frantic calls, the switching off. the emotional roller coaster such simple little things can set up.

stop calling me khushi.

and it is anjali who tells her sister in law that her brother is going to london. he likes to be alone on this day. can't share his pain...

khushi is stunned by this news of his leaving town, but it isn't of herself she thinks... it is only of him. many might think this is wimpish, but that is love... in this already sad sate of mind, his dukh is increasing because of her... she must tell him...

a lover is filled with fear and panic, no i won't let him go, i must prove the truth... she runs out... eyes already beginning to look desperate... he is leaving.

the episode here onward felt like a song, a balad or a ghazal or a gut wrenching love song with a tempo, a beat, a tune, and a cry for love, for life itself... saans hi nahin le...

throughout in the car he thought of no one but her. he reached the airport. a concentrated and lost look on his face.

she is getting there in a cool cab. a little detail bothered me here. surely he has several cars and drivers. in such a well directed and sensitively handled situation, a little what the.

he is inside the airport, walking in... she has reached.  he is leaving without telling her... how much is said in just that.

she has no money to enter, she has forgotten to take the change back from the taxi driver, she is frantic, runs to the gate where they won't let her in... he is walking away. her heart calls out...

"aranv ji," she murmurs looking hassled.
and he hears her... he stops...he knows it is her. bas, pata chal jata hai... and after a long time, a gust of wind... as it has come again and again, in 57 when he thought she was gone, now when he is going away... it comes... a couple of minutes and goosebumps... an entire episode here, a lead up just in his missing her smiling laughing triumphant face.

she would have turned away, but the wind comes and touches her... she turns back... and a slightly stooped dejected looking arnav singh raizada turns too. she sees him at last.

hey hey, the piano notes trill, you can leave each other maybe but the song never leaves your heart your memory.

as his eyes found her, his lips moved just a hint, an involuntary rush of joy in his heart.. a smile, almost. a beautiful smile, eyes lighting.
across the distance a longing and a need spanned... he needed her like he needed nothing else... and she him... to know this truth it will take a bit of time. what if it takes forever. the heart sank at the thought. why did these two actors' love matter to a jaded one like me? maybe because nothing felt like acting. it was real. and in that longing was a preciousness that is so rare, so invaluable. it completely threw off the veil of jadedness that the years bring and said, come, dare to live, to love, to break, and die.

she saw his gaze, she felt the yearning, a happiness seemed to touch her... oh the relief and joy at finding him.

on diwali night a recognition of things that can never be denied had taken place... she had looked through a glass later as he had taken another wild step to somehow escape her spell, not ready to succumb to such a huge feeling. today again, she is behind a glass, tears streaming down her cheeks and he is off.

rabba vey. a few moments of forgetting all reality and just being in each others hearts.

then she was stopped, she called to him... she wanted to speak, suddenly reality stepped back in... jerked him out of that beautiful trance... he turned away...

she called him, he disconnected the line, looking at her all the while... were there tears in his eyes.

she called again... she was not going to stop today, not till she got him to hear, to understand, to come back to her... she couldn't live without that...

agony gripped him, then he, who so wanted to believe that all he had seen was a lie, did give into his gut, his heart, and answered the call.

"kya sunu...!" he gritted out, brusque abrupt tone... no one hurts like a man who knows he is hurting but doesn't yet understand why...

"kya bolna chahti ho...!" what do you want to say. sharp words like shots.

"hum aapko bata na chahte hain ki shyam ji..." i want to tell you that shyam ji...

a jerk of a wrist and the phone is off the ear. shyam... the mere mention hits him hard, blinding pain.

she is heartbroken, he is leaving. she has lost touch with him, her life ebbs... yes it does feel like death... maran re tuhu mama shyam saman.

arnav ji, ruk jaiye... her words float around as the world swirls uncaring and busy with everyday mundane things... ticket. you don't have  a ticket...

beautiful juxtaposition of the mundane and pointless with that deep anguish and an emotion that brings light to everything, even a plain glass door with bright blue frame and plastic palms. 

he wanted to look back... why? and yet he did and he shook off the feeling again and again...

rabba vey played as he left her and she cried not caring where she was, just her feelings mattered.

and then he returned... perhaps that string that ties them is too hard to break, no matter how many times you snap it. he can't stay away.

"aap gaye nahin..." she is mystified, elated. you didn't go.

"aap ruk gaye..." you stayed.

"tumne zabardasti roka," you made me stay. who can do zabardasti with this man. looks away, and back, so much in the eyes.

"kyun kar rahi ho yeh sab?" why are you doing all this.

"kyunki hum aapse baat karna chahte hain!" because i want to talk to you. a spirit in her now... when he is near, she is whole again. the classic lover, incomplete without her love, divine and even mere mortal lovers in culture after culture have been like that. a right, a huq she keeps feeling...

how can you think shyam and i... she starts, and again that name he cannot tolerate. possibly especially from her lips. it is tainting, obscene almost.

"mujhe iss baare mein kuch nahi sunna..." don't want to hear anything about this.

khushi moves swiftly and does a very khushi thing, she snatches away his ticket. he is astounded.

please wait a bit, soon your doubts will clear... she pleads. she believes shyam is on his way to talk to asr. she still believes this will happen.

the hope in his eyes, the plea in hers...

"aap ko rukna hi hoga..." you have to stop... again that right.

"agar aap hamare baare mein aisa sochenge toh humse bardasht nahin hoga..." if you think this of me, i won't be able to tolerate it.

"bardasht nahin hoga... bardasht toh main nahi kar sakta!" you won't be able to tolerate it... i can't tolerate it!

i have done nothing that you should think this of me or give me such a sazaa... punishment.

just looks... liquid, limpid and flecks of fire. a look, a swallow... he leaves...

yet again he returns. beautiful... this push me pull you. unmistakable sign of a vital emotion.

"10 minutes.. dus minute hai tumhare paas sach sabid karne ke liye..."  you have ten minutes to prove the truth. sach... he asks for it finally. soon he won't care, he will know what is the greatest truth. and that in fact cannot be proven.

"uske baad i'll be gone!" then i'll be gone.

crowds jostle the girl he hates... a man moves forward, an arm protects, a body stands between a woman and the world... she is his patni, he her pati, he always her protector. hamesha. this is an instinct he cannot deny. a beautiful moment thought up by creatives. speaks eloquently without a single word.

 he creating that little place for her amidst

the pandemonium.. beautifully thought out..

di said why you are going today, if you stayed... she feels his loving, she tries to break through, touch his core, tell him she is always here... make him feel better.

conventional wisdom: lady, the man has called you all sorts of pretty bad things, don't care, make him apologise and till he does, stay away, be angry. never give in. demand your right.

the wisdom of love: feel his pain, give him care, love him, no matter what he thinks of you, don't stop loving him, if need be just forgive him and forget what he said, he says all this because he hurts.

great love stories have that wisdom. correct sounding tales with political correctness its main aim, will never feel this ecstasy. where submission is the ultimate conquest.

"tumhare pas sirf teen minute hain..." she has only three minutes. a countdown to what...

"tumne aakhri baar mujhse kuch manga aur maine diya... got to go now" he speaks of the last time... akhri... is it the end? you asked me for something for one last time and i gave it to you... imperious... he who gives and asks for nothing... yet the undertow screams, i needed this, i needed you, i wanted you to give me yourself, i need to know you are not that woman, my mind doesn't listen, too many layers of pain numb it befuddle it, my past, my present, your voice, you in another man's arms, release me from this pain, tell me it isn't true. she can perhaps hear all that and more... without words, without perfectly flowing senstences, a lover knows, just like that.

but now he must claim himself back from this vulnerabilty, this defenselessness... h's got to go, cool urbane, invincible, don't care.

she won't let him...

"stop it khushi stop it NOW. i know koi aanewala nahin hai... main ruka sirf issliye tha kyunki..." i know no one's coming, i stopped only because... and that terrifying pause after kyunki... because.

but this time a thought needs to be expressed.

a slight air of helplessness on a stern face...

"kyunki kahin na kahin (voice breaks on kahin) main chahta tha ki tum apne aap ko beqasoor proove karo.. shayad ek hope thi ki shayad tum galat nahi ho... par galat main tha..."

because somewhere i wanted you to prove your innocence... maybe i had a hope that you are not wrong... but i was wrong...

"lekin iss aakhri mauke ko bhi tum utni wafadari se nibhaya jaise apni har galti ko... enough khushi, ab aur nahin... i am going khushi... ab toh sach bata do..." he is so disappointed, sad, miserable really. did he ever ask himself why it was important? why he cared.

she must have made some "stoopid" plan to mislead him he says.

"mat jaiye..." don't go. that's all she can say, she can think or feel. her whole being seems to say that in that torn desperate voice.

her hand on his shoulder... she is getting physical like him. that tension between two people very close, a frenetic feel to it all.

"kyun tumhe faraq padta hai..." why does it make a difference to you? he has felt so badly unloved on that terrace that night. he thought he made all the difference to her, but apparently...

"kyun? kyun faraq padta hai? kyunki baat aapki hai issliye faraq padta hai... aur agar aap hi aise chale jayenge toh hum saans hi nahi le p-"

and she says the words he surely does understand... and long to hear. sanaya's voice trembles, fills with tears and love and a surrender, khushi must say what she feels, though she too has not clearly articulated thoughts, she knows but if he should go, everything would cease to be, especially her breath, she... maran re...

makes a difference because it is you... if you leave like this... then how will i even breathe...

i can't live without you...

the hour of separation is near. hearts are open and vulnerable... inevitability lurks all around, bidding all to rush to it... time ticks, refusing to stand still...

and memories come, one upon another, in pictures, in sound, in every pore of one's being... aisa kyun hota hai...

in his heart echoes of what he had said in an unguarded moment and meant every word, every silence... jab jo bura kaha uska koi matlab nahin.. jab jo bura kiya uska koi matlab nahin.. iss pyaar mein sahi aur galat ka koi matlab nahin, bas... ke main hamesha  hamesha tumse...

she is galat, he is certain now and broken even more, yet what does galat really mean in a love such as this?

she clutches his hand to stop him, please don't go, but he is adamant, he pulls her hand off his, having already taken back his ticket ad putting it into his pocket, beautiful direction here as we will see later.

he leaves. and the saddest walk down the gallery, looking downcast, almost ill, the distance between him and the girl struggling at the doorway increases.

somewhere in a colourless place, a no man's land, he touches his feelings... the voice in his head asks, "kyun aisa feel kar raha hoon main, kyun khushi se door jaane mein ittni taqleef ho rahi hai mujhe... why dammit."

why am i feeling like this... why is it hurting me so much to go far away from khushi... why dammit.

beautiful dialogue. a precise understanding of a state of mind in the language of the man who says it. the distance bothers him. to hate her while she sleeps next to him or makes his life hellish is acceptable.. this distance. yet it is this very thing that will bring peace and reconciliation within.

she looked up at the plane... there up in the sky where she  had once seen his chopper...

asr didn't make it to the plane. barun shot his film. we got the beautiful and emotional kidnap track. maybe his film did not release, but by necessitating this separation, it did a far more magical thing.

have i ever seen such beautiful lovers or felt so much of their feelings. khushi the lover is among us now... that bridge onward she was never the same. the girl is metamorphosing, a woman is emerging, a lover has laid claim... and a man who never had a chance to be a boy has asked the question only a lover can ask, who else bothers to ask why it hurts to leave the one you think is a fallen woman, the one you hate.