Originally posted by: indi52
guru ji?
nahiiin.
nahiin nahin nahin.
me lunatic verbose old lady. bas.
haan haan haan.
samjhe, aap sab?
faiqa...you ze guru foreva (hyuk, how desperately i am trying to learn the new spellings).
wiwy,
thank you thank you. your bhalo dada and not so bhalo didi managed to not fight through the anni. actually had quite a decent time.
now that i've started, a very very personal and pribhaaate moment i am putting on a bhery bhery open thread.
yes, wiwy... it was a special day. not because we drank champagne... which at a friend's party we almost did. nor because he bought me an expensive gift... aww my old buddha ji actually did that too. got me these classic studs from, where is my sweet cynthia... van cleef... alhambra.
yay. i am a earring monster.
but the personal story.
on 14 december 1985, jacob and i got married under the special marriage act of india. as we belong to different religions this is the only marriage considered legally valid in india. and since my not being a jew meant there was no religious ceremony from his side and his being one meant no pooja paath hindu wedding rites, we never had any religious ceremonies when we tied the dhaga. only customs... and a legal certificate. two simple signatures on a piece of paper... and i have lost the original.
this means in strictly technical terms the jewish faith does not recognise our marriage. nor i am sure does the hindu practice (so yes, khushi ji, i am not his patni because there were no pheras... so angry with you when you said that to asr. that your marriage is incomplete? marriages are made in the mind deeply, not by pheras... samjhi?).
anyway, jacob is deeply jewish and quite quite observant... yet, he has never ever asked himself if what he did with me was wrong. in fact i now realise that the very fact he married me and insisted we keep our faiths as is was a major thing.
you see, i am not much into organised religion, so it never mattered to me as such.
so on saturday, when i was sitting in the synagogue attending the shabbath lunch for my daughter's dearest friend's bat mitzvah, yeah i did tell a couple of my friends that today is our anniversary, but didn't make an issue of it. it was also my kid's other good friend's bday, and a boy's bar mitzvah.
very packed day for celebrations. many speeches, much cake cutting and singing and dancing and drinking, the bat mitzvah girl being of georgian origin, her family had flown in with wonderful home made wine, gallons of vodka and georgian sweets, a mad merry atmosphere all around.
and in the middle of that, rabbi gets up and says, well when it rains it pours, we have one more huge celebration today... indi and jacob's wedding anniversary. 28 years, etc.
i felt a huge amount of happiness, gratitude to the eternal, to everyone in my life, and i missed my ma in law. she was always a bit worried about that validity angle. she even suggested i try judaism. i wished she were here to hear the rabbi. a chabad rabbi, most orhodox, wishing us in front of the whole community.
ties are undeniable. mere customs and rituals do not make them.
okay maybe rabbi was so high on the wine, he said dil ki baat, and in doing that he gained loads of respect in my eyes.
sorry to have gone on.
i wanted to tell you all. tried before. then thought of a million things and didn't.
but wiwy's wishes with that man's visage just said, go for it... dil ki baat had to be said.
hope you and your asr had a hot anni too. bless ya, wiwy ji.
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