[QUOTE=BarunDiwani]
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Episode 129:
"sapno ki duniya mein rehna hi acchha hai Lavanyaji, kyu ki asli duniya mein sirf dil tut te hai"
"Its better to stay in a dream world Lavanyaji, because in the real world only hearts break"
my heart broke when i heard Khushi say those words the first time, and every time after the effect of this profound statement remains the same. He had shattered her world of dreams in just a few minutes, to push her away, ironically today he breaks her heart because she is too far away, out of reach with that ring. In this war that resumes, he ruthlessly attacks and attacks and goes for the kill completely forgetting he dies with her with each blow.
As she weeped and said those words to La, i felt her cut was deeper and not just limited to him. The girl who dreamt with her jiji under the stars about their future husbands or the girl that ran out with all her excitement to wish upon a shooting star, truly genuinely put her trust in these things as "Baat vishwaas ki hai" right? Could it be that for her this "vishwaas" offered her protection or a shield from the "bedard" real world as Arnav views it. After surviving her first massive heart break in the "asli duniya" at the age of only 8, perhaps dreaming helped her heal with the help of two bright stars in the sky. Maybe i'm thinking too much into this, but as a dreamer myself, this like is much to real and surely relatable to many who watched the show.
It was La who once again acted as cupid and forced Khushi into a bridal outfit. an outfit with red in it and if that wasn't enough "let your hair out" she insisted, havn't a clue of the havok Khushi's open hair causes on her to-be-fiance, then she practically pushes her in front of him..poor La, she was only going for the full length mirror not the full length laad governer!
He is just getting off the phone with his Di when that wind, that wonderful gust of wind forces him to look in her direction. Through the shiney beaded strands, there she stood and her reflections in the mirror. Before long, the mehsoos reached her and she felt his eyes on her. She's seen this look in his eyes before...twice.
The look as if he's high on her beauty, the nasha shows in his slow blinks. She looks away and fiddles with her pallu, he makes her so nervous with his constant gaze, but she allows his eyes on her... she could've ran back to the changing room to put her regular clothes on but she chose to stay. So he looks on, the much familiar admiration of her beauty from bottom to top, she filled his eyes with sensuality again.
She grips her dupatta, and glides her finger down to up, eventually fearlessly looking back at him...these aroused feelings all too new for her but so evident how badly she want to reciprocate. She marks his slow steps towards her, she expands her pallu to cover the rest of her torso .
he parts the beaded partition to have a closer look like he always has to with a slight pleased smile on his face (what girl wouldn't want to be looked at like this dammit?).
Then he gently lifts his hand up, to touch her velvety face i assume, but she moves back snapping him out of his trans. The quick thinking ASR drops his hand down to the price tag, he knew he would find something there to continue his attack on her in this war of pyaar and nafrat.
34999 rs. said the price tag. He starts his second "vaar"(attack) of the day.
"utna bhi boora nahi hai, par tum aur tumhara fiance afford nahi kar paoge, "
"Its not so bad, but you and your fianc won't be able to afford it"
oh the need to keep taking jabs at a man he's never met... jealousy, what a passionate emotion it is. He continues the blow, "what a pity...par aaj mein bahut acche mood mein hoon so what the hell? mein tumhe kharid ke dedeta hoon, apne fiance se ki Arnav Singh Raizada ne engagement present diya hai"
So many layers to this one line, he wants to buy the lehnga for Khushi because he loves her in it, but he insults her fianc again AND he feels the need to let her fiance know of him doesn't he? by buying this for Khushi would also send message to the man that "stole" her away.
Still in his quest for faraq his ruthless vaar pushes limits on the quiet, sad eyed, hurt, girl
"After all tumne mere aur Lavanya ke liye itna kuchh kiya hai, gift nahi, to tip samajh ke le lo" in an instant, with a deadly smirk, he reduced her to a servant. Indirectly, reminding her once again of her hesiyat, her aukaad. Clueless himself as to how far he had gone, after all he had insulted her middle class status over and over since day 1, but this time he went too far and it broke her inside.
She wouldn't dare show him the broken pieces of her heart though, it took all she had but she answered back. She takes back the price tag from his hand
"Nahin chahiye, lekin puchh ne ke liye shukriya, aur aapne teek kaha tha, utna bhi boora nahi hai, lekin utna khaas bhi nahi hai, hamme yeh pasand nahi hai"
The smirk disapeared because the lehenga was khaas to him, but her rejection of this choice and refusal to accept it was an hidden insult to him...also the way she talks to him with such formality must get to him. Since they met, they both have fought like they are only each others to fight with, never letting others like La get in the way, but now while he continues to hurt her with full rights still as she his his to fight with, her formal addressing makes her feel distant from him. His nostrils flare up, also hurt sine he can only stare at her with no comeback. Soon his phone rings and leaves, not a second went by as rest of her tears came pouring out. La comes out breifly, engulfed in trying out her next dress, she doesn't notice Khushi's sad face.
Khushi slowly finds a place to sit, his sharp words run through her mind and cut through her heart. He, on the phone, but comes to a halt after seeing his Khushi just sitting there tearing up, looking at the price tag. It may have just hit him how far he went
"Chamkili, I feel like i'm living in dream world" and excited La completely oblivious to all that's happened shares with her friend. The price tag still in her hold, Khushi lets out her anguish "sapno ki duniya mein rehna hi acchha hai Lavanyaji, kyu ki asli duniya mein sirf dil tut te hai"
One of the most profound dialogues in the show, delivered with perfect pitch of heart break and emotion by Sanaya.
Her tears drop on the price tag, hurting him 1000X more. Remorse sets in looking at her incredible sadness that he caused, wanted to just take it away. He wants her to have faraq, what ever the cost but the only problem is, a bad side effect of tons of pain and faraq to himself... too much pain and faraq. If this was the worst he had hurt her, it was the worst he felt, it would also be the closest he would come to wiping her tears with his own hands.
As he watched her sob, he couldn't help but once again part the beaded partition, and step towards her, lifting his hand to wipe those tears away, to hold her in his arms and just wanting to take away all the pain that he inflicted...all the while, fighting the tears in his own eyes... soon the hand that reached out to her turns into a fist indicating his agonizing attempt at gaining some composure. Enduring and gulping down her pain, he cries with her, as much crying a man like Arnav Singh Raizada is capable of.
Just a sad scene all around. Only after closing his eyes, some composure returns, just enough to loosen the fist and walk away...fast. She hadn't noticed his presence, maybe because the depth of her pain, but she did feel him in the dangling beaded partition he left behind. She knew he was there just like the night of Janmastami when he came to check up on her at the GH.
Soon after he would call La's phone, which has been put on speaker as per her request, "Lavanya, mein jaa raha hoon" (I'm leaving). The abruptness of it all surprises Khushi
"haan mein...mein ruk nahi...matlab mujse ruka nahi jaayega, i..i cant stay...i have to go"
he says erratic hand tapping on the steering wheel. Since when does Arnav Singh Raizada get flustered completing a simple sentences? Khushi can't see her rattled up laad governor, but i hope she senses how shaken up he is? and that it has to do with her broken heart...the unbarablity of it all! How could he stay and look her in the eyes he bought such tears to ?
He hangs up and tosses the bluetooth aside, and flashes back to her words dipped in heartbreak "sapno ki duniya mein rehna hi acchha hai Lavanyaji, kyu ki asli duniya mein sirf dil tut te hai" they bug him to no end and by the time he makes it home he thinks back to all the other times he has hurt her badly "
"Yeh mat sochna ki ek amir aadmi tumhari payal ko apni seene se laga kar baitha tha" ("Don't think that a rich man held you payal close to his heart" )
"kahin aisa na ho ki jisse tumne raiz samajh ke fasaya, ha, iss bracelet ki tarah sasta ho" (Make sure the man you entrapped thinking he's rich turns out be cheap like the bracelet)
He thinks back to the way he made her apologize for that ring and finally the words that did both of them in today "Gift nahin to tip samajh ke le lo" (if not as a gift, accept it as a tip )
He hits the driving wheel
"kyu karta hoon mein aisa? hamesh uski aakhon mein aansoo? kyu uski har baat se itni takleef hoti hai mujhe?"
"Why do i do this? always bringing tears to her eyes, why does every little thing cause me pain?
"ab aisa nahin hoga" (this wont happen anymore) One of many "koshish" he confessed to Khushi later during kidnapping, to not fall in love with her...he won't allow her every tear, every baat to cause him taqleef "kyu ki mein aisa hone nahi doonga" (because i won't let it happen)...so determined he is...can't help but feel sorry for the guy. He genuinely doesn't want her to make such a difference, but she does and it's this faraq that will ultimately beat him at his own war.
/QUOTE]
Amazing take for a very heart breaking epi Ami. This scene ought to be the MOST hurtful one of all. As you rightly said at the end, he truly wanted all this not to make farq but it was not to be. His hands involuntarily go to push those strands of hair, cup that face.. just irresistible... again amidst all the hate, hurt.. this man's love just stands above all!!
Wondered by making both of them go through these back and forth trips to hell last one week, he was perhaps trying to help her to come out with her feelings for him so that he can help her.. "help me to help you"...as her unhappiness with that engagement bothered him a lot!!
Yes, that "Vishwas" of her is what set her most apart from his cynicism than anything else.. which made all the difference... her trying to find happiness in everything and his painful brooding!
Loved your analysis of the farq all the pics ami!
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