Arhi SS : Khamoshiyan [ Completed ] - Page 56

* Paragraphs in italics are Arnav and Khushi thinking to themselves.

Part 9

'BANG!' Khushi heard the door close behind them. In mere seconds, she was pulled into his arms, for a bone crushing hug. For a moment, she was taken aback by its force, but as she felt him breathe erratically into her hair, she responded to him. She hugged him back to soothe away the anger that she could feel emanating from him. She mainly hugged him, though, to let all the fear and anxiousness drain away from her own self. Since they had set out for the court, she could not help but feel dread overpower all her senses. Throughout the trial, she had lost the ability to speak, the confidence to fight back and frankly, she had lost herself.

Now that she stood in the warmth of his arms, she felt all her fear seeping away. His hand moved over her back, soothing her with his comforting words. She heard him chanting an apology, over and over again. After a few minutes of this comforting silence, Khushi became aware of their awkward positions. Her hands loosened from around his waist, as she tried to pry herself away from him. She heard his soft groan at the loss of contact between them. They looked at each other for a moment, before she turned away from him.

He stood up for me today. He fought for me. He didn't let go of my hand even for a second. He has changed so much, since I told him the truth. What am I supposed to do now? He apologized, he begged me to give him another chance. He is trying... trying to heal the wounds of the past and trying to create new memories for the future... but I am stuck in a present which does not allow me to either forget my past or move towards the future. Today, when he screamed at Shyam saying, 'Don't you dare utter one more word, against my wife!', why did my heart suddenly skip a beat? That stupid acidity is back again. I cannot believe that this is the same Arnavji, who forced me to marry him' the Arnavji who believed in Shyamji, without even giving me a chance to explain. I can see the love shining bright in his eyes..., love that I have always wanted to see. However, I am scared... so scared to trust him now, so I choose to look through these feelings so clear in his mesmerizing eyes.

"Khushi..., tum theek ho?" His husky voice broke her reverie, and she turned to look into the same eyes that she had been thinking about. He had asked her this question, in the past and as always, her heart rejoiced, feeling his concern. He had always had that effect on her, however hard she tried to hate him. Not being able to form the right words to answer, she nodded mutely. She could feel that he wanted to talk... and frankly she wanted to talk herself... talk about what lay ahead for them, about how they were going to tell their families about their contract marriage, and about him letting her go. She had wanted to leave Shantivan, the night he had told her the truth about their forced marriage. Though now, she was not too sure of her decision. He had started breaking through the barriers around her heart. His love was slowly seeping through the cracks, spreading warmth through her entire being. She heard him clear his throat to speak, and wondered what it was that he wanted to talk about now.

"Khushi, look at me... please." He held her arms gently and pulled her a little closer. She somehow managed to look into his eyes again, as he continued, "Why didn't you tell me about Shyam, Khushi? Why didn't you tell me that he was the scumbag you were engaged to? If you or your family would have told us the truth then, we could have saved so much of heart-break." His voice was strained and helpless, yet something snapped inside Khushi at his words. She pushed at him with all her strength, leaving Arnav startled at her action.

"You ask me why I didn't tell you the truth before, Mr. Arnav Singh Raizada? After all that you did to me, you are really asking me, why I didn't tell you about Shyamji before? You hated me then, left no opportunity to demean me. The day I came to know of his treachery, I ran to Di to tell her the truth. But she was so fearful about her marriage, so devoted to her husband. How could I break her trust? How could I hurt her feelings? And then Shyamji too had instilled the fear of Jiji's rishta breaking off with Jijaji. JUST LIKE YOU DID!!" She pushed at his chest again, as he staggered back a couple of steps. She had to catch her breath, before continuing, "How could I again be the reason for breaking my Jiji's marriage, Arnavji? I could not think clearly. I wished I could come and tell you everything. In fact, a couple of times I almost did. But you..., you had called me a gold digger. You said I was low-class, an opportunist, who was working for you, just to make more money. What could I have said then, that would have made you believe me?"

Even though Khushi was looking at Arnav, her anger did not let her see the tears that were now rolling down his face freely. She was fuming with anger at his question, although she herself sometimes wished that she had gone ahead and told everyone about Shyamji's deceit. Looking at Di taking everything in her stride so well, she had wondered if her fear had been baseless then. However, what was done was done, there was no looking back now. As she looked at him, she could not help but ask him a few questions, which had been weighing down on her for some time now...

"Arnavji, would you have believed me if I had told you then? Would you have tried to find out the truth? The day when you saw us on the terrace, why did you ask Shyamji about it? Why did you not question me? Why did you not give me a chance to explain? If you saw us on the terrace hugging, why didn't you wait to see what happened after that? Why did you not walk in then and there, to slap me hard for deceiving you and your family? Why did you walk away, Arnavji?"

There was a moment of silence in the room. The only sound was of their raspy breathing. Khushi finally could see the tear tracks marring his always handsome face. The tears seem to have dried up. He was looking down, at nothing in particular. Khushi could see a lost and sad child in front of her, who craved love and comfort. Right now, there was nothing she could offer him. Her heart was devoid of any emotion. He finally looked up into her sad eyes and she could see nothing, but despair in them.

"Khushi..." he sighed deeply, as if taking her name itself had drained him. "I am so sorry. I think the word 'sorry' cannot justify how much I have wronged you. Yet, I will not move back from saying it again and again and again, till your heart can forgive me for everything I did. I never meant to question you Khushi, believe me when I say that I only wished that you had confided in someone then. On hindsight, I hate knowing that you went through so much all alone. I never gave you any reason to trust me, so I can only imagine how difficult it must have been for you. I am just angry with myself for keeping my true feelings hidden from you. I wish I had shown you, how much you had begun to mean to me. And the day that I decided to tell you everything..." Arnav stopped talking. He could not continue, as the last few words came out in a strangled whisper. He turned around and took a few steps away from her, to give them both, some much required space.

After composing himself, she heard him continue "Khushi, I had hated the idea of love since my childhood. My parents' failed marriage and their suicide, made me hate the idea of love itself. Then I met you..., and everything changed. The more I tried to hate you, the more I fell in love with you. On the day of Akash and Payal's wedding, Di made me realize how unpredictable life is, and that if I loved someone, I should not wait to express my feelings. So that night, I had followed you to the terrace to tell you that I really liked you, that I was slowly falling for you. I was shocked to see the sight that awaited me there'. Shyam was hugging you. Yes! I was hurt by Shyam for cheating on my Di, but I was completely devastated, to realize that you did not reciprocate my feelings. I thought that you had led me on, while having an affair with Shyam." Khushi flinched at this statement, and he stopped talking. He moved towards her again and held her delicate hands. She was amazed at how perfectly they fit into his.

He continued, "Khushi, can we just try and be friends for a few days? I know the past is impossible to forget, but you said you would leave this house..., leave ME at the end of this month. I just want to share some beautiful moments with you. I am not saying that I am giving up on us... Hell, no! I would like us to just try to know each other, in the true sense. Khushi, can we just... hmm... we..." She saw Arnav struggle to form the right words, but her mind had already been made.  "Yes" she said on pure instinct...' that instinct telling her to make some memories that would last her for a lifetime. She was tired of crying over the past, she was exhausted, being unhappy. She missed her real self dearly. She was 'Khushi' and she had every right to be happy.  After venting out all her pent-up frustration and feelings tonight, she was feeling much lighter... and she made up her mind instantly. She would enjoy the remaining few days in Shantivan. She would make some beautiful memories to cherish forever. She looked back into Arnav's eyes, which shone with untold happiness, without realizing that they were mirroring her own.

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Arnav had been seething in anger since his outburst in the courtroom. How dare Shyam accuse his Khushi, once again? That too in front of the entire court? The moment he had uttered Khushi's name, Arnav's mind lost control, his face had contorted in an all - consuming anger; his nostrils flaring, eyes flashing and narrowed into slits. He had the urge to strangle Shyam, but all he could do was roar in thundering fury. The only reason he calmed down a bit, was when he had looked at Khushi's shocked and fearful face. Fear was the last thing he wanted to see in her. He was there to comfort her, and soon she came back to sit beside him. He again held her soft hands in his own, trying to comfort her in any way that he possibly could, and also to calm his own tense nerves.

The drive home was quiet, but the inner turmoil he felt was distressing. He had wanted to pull Khushi into his arms, not caring for the outside world. However, he was uncertain about how Khushi would react. She already seemed so distraught and he had not wanted to do anything that would add to her misery. As they had walked back home, he could not help but pull her along to their room. He had engulfed her in his shaking embrace, and thankfully, she had not resisted. He just wanted to feel her heartbeat close to his, to ensure, she was there... with him. He wanted to make certain that she was alright.

After a few moments of silence, he had asked her about why she had never told him about Shyam. After her story in the courtroom of Shyam's treachery, Arnav wanted to know Khushi's reasons for hiding the truth for so long. Even though he knew, that it had been his fault largely to drive her to this, he had wanted Khushi to vent out her feelings'.her grief, her pain, her anger, her helplessness about the past. He had wanted her heart to be free from all the anger and hatred. She needed to once again be the pure, innocent soul she had been and still was deep inside. And Arnav Singh Raizada, very well knew how to instigate his wife, Khushi Kumari Gupta'. Singh Raizada.   

Even though Arnav had been prepared to hear Khushi's accusations, he had been shattered once again, when she had actually said them. Her every word cutting deep, had pierced his heart like a sharp dagger. He had staggered back at the force of her anger.  The dam had broken, and so had his heart. He regretted each time that he had demeaned her, each time he had pretended that she did not matter to him. His tears were beyond control as they rolled down freely, as if emptying his heart of a big burden. As she poured her heart out to him, he wanted to reach out to her and hold her close. She asked him questions, the answers to which, he had buried deep... in a corner of his heart.

She had told him the entire truth, and it was time for him to reveal his side of the story too. Arnav had told her everything, including the reason for his behavior. Even though he could see Khushi trying to bravely hear him out, he could see how much the past was hurting her. He realized that it was time for them to move on, in the truest sense, and he could not wait to ask if she was ready to do so. He wanted to spend some time with her, without the baggage of their tortured past, just the two of them... and so he asked, if they could be friends, for the little bit of time that was left now. What surprised him most, though, was her quick response to his incomplete question. She had said a 'yes' and that meant the world to him. He realized that today, they had moved one major step ahead in their relationship.

The morning brought in a breath of fresh air, engulfing both of them in its freshness. Arnav had not realized the complete power of Khushi's smile and laughter, till she had flashed it at him. She had laughed at some of his quirky comments at the breakfast table. Even though the entire family had looked at the couple, surprised, Arnav and Khushi were lost in their own little world. Despite the underlying tension in their marriage, they were putting in efforts to forget it for a while and enjoy their time together. Arnav could not have been a happier man to see his Khushi, talk to him like she did with others. He had always missed her cheeky banter. She used to be all closed-up and extremely conscious around him. But now, they had actually started having comfortable conversations with each other.

The next three to four days were magical, if Arnav had to put it romantically. They had spent hours talking at night, about their childhood, about growing up, about family and friends. They had spoken about their favourite colours, movies, food and chatted casually about their work. Even though Arnav knew most of this information, he felt thrilled at hearing it from her. She was opening her life to him and he would take anything and everything she offered. Just spending time watching her antics made him feel all the love that he felt for this woman' his wife.

One night, he had managed to ask her out for dinner. He had taken her to her favourite dhaba, and she had been pleasantly surprised. That was the first time they had spoken of their memories, which actually had given them happiness. She had told him how much she had feared him in the beginning when he used to boss her around. She had spoken about those hilarious times, when her pranks had landed him in trouble. The tea thrown at him, the empty petrol tank of his car on the Nainital trip, the way she had manipulated him to agree to so many things. They had deliberately left the unhappy parts out.

Arnav on the other hand, had spoken about how she would always faint and fall into his arms. He teased her about the number of times he had helped her out. He spoke about untangling her from the fairy lights at the poolside, about helping her out of the arrangement of diyas at Diwali and bailing her out by dancing with her at the sangeet. All these memories had then led them to feel the magnetic pull between them. The crackling chemistry was back, simmering slowly, like a low flame. Arnav could not help wanting her'.he wished he could just grab Khushi by her arms and kiss her senseless. However, he had become controlled now, and did not want to act on an impulse and ruin everything. So, instead, he had taken her to Laxmi Nagar to eat her favourite Kulfi, and to cool down their senses.

That night as Arnav lay on the recliner, he could not help thinking of the amazing life he could have with Khushi. He smiled at the thought of a beautiful, happy life. He would love to spend his entire life pampering Khushi and fulfilling her every wish. Only if she would give him that, 'one chance'. However, now was not the time to wallow in self-pity. It was the time for some action. Khushi's birthday, the day after tomorrow, would serve as the perfect occasion. He had planned a lot of things for her, and he would set them into action tomorrow. He would make this birthday, the most memorable day for her. The only thing Arnav did not know was that, this birthday would be the most memorable day for him too.

Part 10