SwaSan TS: Music of the Soul-The Agony & the Ecstasy-Completed - Page 43

Originally posted by: CogitoErgoSum

Nitz my dear...🤗 🤗

So I am back from my lappie, to reply to your wonderful comment to my heart's content. 1000's of jhappis to you my dear for this. Your comment kind of made my weekend so very special. 😃

You told me once earlier that I wasn't allowed to tahnk you---no thanks between pals, as per Sansku Baba. 😊 So no sorry also, na? Please don't say Sorry and stuff. I know real life pressures get in the way, am just so happy that you read it when time permitted and gave such an analytical comment for each chapter. Can I say I was so, so very touched you had actually researched the background of the Raagas I had mentioned. Really, Nitz, that supreme dedication on your part to read this piece moved me so much. I felt completely humbled and touched yaara. I want to say "Thanks a Ton" here, but kya kare, you have forbidden me from saying that!

Part 1: You put wonderfully well, the shades and layers to Ragini's nature I was trying to portray, linking it up with Raag Yaman Kalyan. As you rightly mentioned from your background research on this Raag, this is one of the fundamental ones in Hindustani music, and is among the very first taught to students. And it is deceptively simple. 😉 In the hands of a master, a talented performer, this Raag is just pure magic. It has distinct qualities of peace, harmony and tranquility; as well as very romantic overtones. It conveys so much yearning and the pain of separation through its beautiful melodic content. I wanted to show Ragini's gradual realization, her slow steps towards repentance and her ultimate redemption through this Raag. I wanted to convey in this section, the difference between Sanskaar's love for Swara, and Ragini's love for Lakshya. The former is pure, unconditional and selfless, the latter was twisted, fanatic, even obsessive. And the tragedy in Ragini's life was, she felt this burning, warped version of love for a person who wasn't worthy of it...

And I do feel that Sanskaar is the person who can help her with this, even more than Swara. He has walked on the dark side after all, and he knows the importance of a genuine chance given to rediscover one's true self. I think he would be feeling some residual guilt for pushing Ragini initially down this path to wrongdoing (when he himself was a gray character), though he repented and tried his utmost to turn her back from the brink. It was too late for Ragini at that point, perhaps, as she had gone too far in her crazed obsession for Lakshya. But who better than Sanskaar, to know the value of another chance? He is such a genuine man, with a heart of burnished gold, that he would definitely help Ragini if he could.

But as you rightly identified, he is too canny and wise to be taken in by her. He will be kind but firm, and if she tries to pull any tricks with Swara, I see him being very open with Ragini, that he will be her worst enemy. 😊 His primary focus, his devoted attention, is on Swara, and nothing will change that, even when he feels hurt and mistrusted by Swara. This man's love is so very pure and unconditional.

I also really feel sad that the CVs did not take the chance to redeem Ragini after the kidnapping episode. There were so many lovely possibilities, but they made her into a completely evil character. So sadistic and cruel. 🤢

Just in case of interest, some gems in Raag Yaman Kalyan are: "Jambupathe", "Krishna Nee Begane"; and "Bhavayami Gopalabalam" from the Classical (Carnatic) side. Some famous film songs in this Raag are "Beethi Na Bithayee Raina"; "Is Mod se Aate Hain"; and "Chandan Sa Badan, Chanchal Chitvan". 😊

Part 2: Am so very happy to hear you liked the portrayal of the morning scene in Maheshwari Mansion. I wanted to show that bond between Annapurna and Sanskaar, because though she is biased towards her own sons (and extremely so towards Lakshya), I do feel, at some level, she is genuinely very fond of Sanskaar. I think she always felt he was the son she wanted but never had; and that, in a paradoxical sense, made her even more protective and biased towards Lakshya, as she perhaps felt guilty for thinking Sanskaar was better than her own son!

Raag Bhairav, with its qualities of devotion, focus and sombre purity, really describes Sanskaar's innate character. You are perfectly right in your research dear---Jaago Mohan Pyare is a wonderful example of this Raag. Another one I had in mind was the great, great MS Subbulakshmi's bhajan "Jaya Jagadeesha", from Jayadev's "Geeta Govinda". Another Krishna themed bhajan. 😊 Speaking of film songs in this Raag, there is "Albela Sajan" from Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam.

I wanted to show Swara pining for Sanskaar, wanting to assuage his pain, feeling so upset and crushed that she hurt him. And I also wanted to show how deep Sanskaar's hurt and pain went, the fact of Swara's mistrust in him had shaken the very foundations of his self.

I was so glad that you liked their reconciliation scene, after she conveys through her soulful music, her feelings for him. I wanted Swara to explain clearly why she could have had a momentary doubt that Sanskaar could be the kidnapper. The fact is, that she knows how much Sanskaar adores her, how protective he is of her. Once when Ragini had insulted her in the baadi, making sly allusions about Swara's "illegitimacy", Sanskaar had got so furious, he even tried to make Ragini shut up by grasping her throat. So Swara could have, momentarily at least, feared that Sanskaar could have abducted Ragini to teach her a lesson, since Ragini had maligned Swara so badly in front of Annapurna & Sujata.

But where she erred badly was, she should have known Sanskaar would never have let the blame fall on Swara. Nor would he have let her be so terribly worried about Ragini for a couple of days, he would much rather have confessed. I wanted to show Swara sincerely apologizing to Sanskaar for that, and assuring him that she would never, ever doubt him in the future.

So you liked Swara's observation about Sanskaar's molten chocolate brown eyes, huh? I liked writing that part, too. 😳 And I went to SwaSan dreamland for writing that kiss scene. ☺️ Very happy to hear you liked the romance and sensuous passion in that...And also glad that you liked the further steps Ragini takes towards her redemption in this part, by giving some advice to Swara in an indirect manner. She's still struggling with her feelings of envy and bitterness, but she's trying to overcome that negativity and go back to her true self.

Part 3: Am so happy Nitz, that you liked the SwaraGini scene after the sisters have finally reconciled. I do hope to see this on TV as well, after all, the sibling bond is one of the most beautiful relationships, na? I don't have a sister, but I have an elder brother who means the world to me. I'm sure, once Ragini decides to redeem herself and go back on the path to the person she used to be, both Swara and Sanskaar would stand by her side and support her. They would never let her feel isolated and friendless.

Raag Todi is a very versatile Raag, conveying the whole gamut of human emotions. I wanted to show that in Ragini, that she has found peace and satisfaction. There is still some melancholy and pathos for all the sins she committed, but she has found joy in redeeming herself, and in rediscovering her sibling bond with Swara, and her friendship with her Jeeju-- Sanskaar. 😊 Once again, I am so very happy to hear that you liked the romance scene between SwaSan in this part. I wanted so badly, to give them so very tender and passionate moments, since we are not getting that on TV. I thoroughly enjoyed writing it, so it is such a pleasure to hear that you loved reading it! 😉

As for Lakshya Maheshwari----you know my feelings for him too well. 😛 Somehow, I do feel he is a coward emotionally. He just doesn't have the intellectual and emotional depth of Sanskaar. You might remember a dialogue from Harry Potter, where Hermione tells Ron that he has the emotional range of a teaspoon!! Lakshya is like that. I feel, even if he hadn't got infatuated with Swara, and had gone ahead with his engagement to Ragini of his own free will, he still would not have been able to accept and reciprocate the sheer intensity of her feelings for him. He is just not capable of that depth of emotion, he is a completely shallow chap.

And yes, in this part, I ahd a lot of fun making him do his usual flop planning to frame Sanskaar, and then getting caught in his own web! I loved making Ragini bite his hand (when he had come to her room, masked and caped, and was clamping his hand over her mouth), and then of course, Ram Prasad giving him a hard, stinging slap on his face! 😆

SwaSan will have a mini honeymoon in the baadi, away from the madness that is MM! 😉 I am planning to write a mini shot on that later, will be completely SwaSanlicious. Hope you will like it.

BTW, just in case of interest, one of the famous film songs based on Raag Todi, is Lata ji's "Raina Beeti Jaaye". On the Carnatic side, Smt MS Subbulakshmi's chanting of Adi Shankara's stotras are also in this raag.

Lastly, just want to say again, I am deeply touched by this comment Nitz dear. Love you loads and loads for this. I love you anyway, actually! 😊

Originally posted by: CogitoErgoSum

My Dear Suha...🤗 🤗


HUGS BACK VIJI😊

I was just blown away by your comment dear. It is always a pleasure and a privilege to have your feedback on my works.

AWWW THATS VERY SWEET OF U😊

I am so very glad you liked the trajectory of Ragini's slow redemption, which started in Chapter 1. As you correctly identified in your comment, I wanted to portray the differences between Sanskaar's pure and unconditional love for Swara; and Ragini's fanatic, obsessive love for Lakshya.

PERFECTLY WRITTEN...

I am very happy to hear that you liked the Sanskaar---Ragini takkar wala scene. 😊 I do feel Sanskaar would give her a chance to redeem herself. I think he still feels slightly guilty for starting her down this wrong path (when he was a gray character). Of course, he did his utmost to pull her back from the brink, but she was too far gone in her wrongdoing by that point.

ITS HIS GOODNESS TO GIVE HER ANOTHER CHANCE...

GOOD MOVE VIJI

I feel Sanskaar knows better than anyone else, the value of a second chance given to repent and rediscover one's innate goodness. He would surely help Ragini if she chose to realize her sins, and redeem herself. Swara would also of course, help her.


VERY TRUE

But Sanskaar is first and foremost, Swara's husband, love, friend, protector. So this is why he tells Ragini, that if she tries to harm or insult Swara, he is still her enemy today. But yes, even enemies can have respect! 😊 I feel Sanskaar is a very realistic person, he believes in truth, integrity and justice; but he also knows how to handle the world as it really is. He is not so idealistic as Swara, who always sees things in black or white, and doesn't see the shades of grey, the weaknesses in people. Sanskaar will always follow the correct path whenever possible, but when needed, he will not hesitate to use some well planned tactics, to achieve a worthwhile and good goal. This characteristic makes him very identifiable, very realistic and very human. 😊

👏⭐️SUPERB LINES...THATS WHY WE CAL HIM GLORIOUS MAN

I really wanted to interweave the theme of music into this 3S, and am so very happy to hear that you liked it, dear. Swaragini started with the music theme, and we were shown how important music is, in the lives of both Swara and Ragini. But these days, we hardly get to see this aspect at all.

HOPE THEY CONCENTRATE ON MUSIC PART...IT VL B VERY GRACEFUL TO WATCH

I wanted to show Ragini completely immersed in the Raag Yaman Kalyan, a lovely Raag which has very high emotional content, is used by poets and singers to convey the feelings of romance, yearning and love. She was thinking of Lakshya throughout, but realized that he is obsessed with Swara. Finally, Ragini realizes that Swara and Sanskaar truly love each other, but are passing through a misunderstanding, partly due to Ragini's and Lakshya's own actions.

In the end, though Ragini is still feeling envious and bitter, her process of realization and repentance has started. This will grow through chapters 2 and 3. 😊

YES DEAR...SENSED THAT

Thanks again for this superb feedback, Suha. Love you Loads!

COMPLETELY MY PLEASURE...LOVE YOU TOO DEARIE

----Viji

Originally posted by: CogitoErgoSum

You are the sweetest Suha...🤗

Thanks for the compliment. You really make me feel so very happy with your wonderfully analytical comments. 🤗

Originally posted by: Monica_Suhasini

❤️ 🤗

ITS UR ENCHANTED WRITINGS MAKES ME TO COMMENT LIKE THAT...

CREDIT TO YOU

M REALLY GLAD THAT M ABLE TO BRING SMILE ON UR FACE

STAY BLESSED

Originally posted by: CogitoErgoSum

Hey Suha dear. ...

Thanks so much once again. 😊 It's really a pleasure and a privilege to get your lovely comments.

When time permits, do read parts 2 and 3 also, and tell me what you thought. Your feedback always means a great deal to me.

Wish you and your family a Very Merry Xmas. 🤗

Originally posted by: asexualflower

Viji, 🤗

First of all, sorry again for the tardiness of this comment. 😕

Part One

Okay so first of all, I loved the whole music theme you had going with the entire TS. You seem to know a lot about the different raags, have you studied music? I also loved how the plot of each part of the TS incorporated whichever raag was in the title of the part. 👏

I loved the way you started the TS, with that quote and then relating it to Ragini. 👏

I also liked how you explored more of Ragini's mom and her childhood. It really gave good context to your TS.

I really like the way you describe your characters and their actions. Like Lakshya, Annapurna, and Sujata were described so aptly at the beginning of the TS.

I'm also so very glad you redeemed Ragini. She is a title character and she's better positive anyways. Sanskaar's part in redeeming Ragini was great too. And I mean it only makes sense, he was the one who took her down the road of evil, he should help her come back as well. The entire conversation between the two of them in Part One was penned so beautifully. The way he explained everything to her, and the way she was contemplating the pros and cons of telling the truth. 👏

I honestly loved that bit after Ragini finished playing the sitar. Lakshya looking at Swara, Swara looking at Sanskaar, and Sanskaar looking anywhere but Swara. 😆😆😆 I don't know why but I found that pretty funny,

And Oh. My. God. Your description of the sun setting as Ragini stood in the balcony was so beautiful, I could literally visualize the sun setting in front of my eyes as I read that. 👏

Part Two

Once again your description of the daily sunrise in MM was described so wonderfully. 👏

Overall, I really like the flow of how you write. With one thing leading to another. All the references you make are relevant and integrated into your writing so well.

"to have him right beside her, and to miss him anyway." This was such an impactful and heartbreaking sentence.

The arti bit was so cute.

And the part where Swara started describing his eyes, I was wondering to myself, hmm how will Sanskaar ever reply to this? And then he said "I'm going to kiss you." and I literally cannot think of a better way he could've replied to her description. 😳

Overall Part Two was perfectly Swasanlicious. And somehow, even though it was mostly about them, you still managed to flawlessly develop other pivotal characters in the TS like Ragini.

Part Three

Okay so for this part, I really liked how you started it off in the future. And then went back to describe the events which had unfolded.

And the bond you showed between Swaragini was so cute too. It reminded me of the older days when Swara used to tease Ragini about Lakshya (before the CV's complicated everything 😵).

I really liked how you dug deep into Lakshya's character in Part Three. And I loved the monologue you used from Dhadkan, it fit his character so perfectly.

And the confrontation scene which unfolded was perfect too. With Swara and Sanskaar both standing up for each other, Ram slapping Lakshya, Annapurna trying to support him, Ragini finally saying the full and complete truth, Annapurna still trying to defend Lakshya, and finally Durga Prasad taking the upper hand.

And then you took us back in the future to such a cute scene between Swasan. 😳

And finally, at the end, I loved the way you compared and contrasted Swasan and described their love. It was all too perfect.

On the forum, you're one of my favourite writers. 😛 The way you write, one can go back and read your work multiple times without getting bored. 😆

Once again, sorry I'm so late with this comment.

Oh and as always, thanks for the PM's. Otherwise, I would definitely miss your marvelous work. 😆

- Sapna

Originally posted by: Monica_Suhasini

Love you viji. .

Thanku very much for the warm wishes...

Read part 2 also but has to comment..

This winter z troubling me dearie...

M very suceptible to cold...so unable to come here frequently these days...

Vl comment soon...

Stay blessed🤗

Originally posted by: CogitoErgoSum

Hey Sapna...🤗 🤗

Thanks for that absolutely lovely comment. Am so very glad to hear you liked this TS.

Am on travel at the moment so typing a brief reply on my phone. Will post a detailed revert as soon as I get to my lappie. 😊

And you are absolutely welcome about the pm's. 😊