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Chapter 8 - Shards Dancing in the Wind
"Lakshya beta what happened?" asked an exasperated Annapoorna for the umpteenth time now, but her son only sulked in reply. Something was wrong, she felt it - she had called Ragini too, but she didn't answer her call either, did these two fight bad this time, she wondered. Maybe Swara could tell her, she wondered and dialled her.
Lucky's head shot up as he heard his mother gasp in shock and said "What?!?"on the phone. Who was she taking to? "Ma" he called out uncertainly when Annapoorna hung up the phone visibly perturbed and said, "Swara..." and her voice trailed off.
Lucky sprang to his feet and dashed to his mother and enquired what was wrong, a dishevelled Annapoorna replied that Swara had collapsed at her home for no apparent reason, and she was admitted to the hospital.
Lucky didn't wait for any other detail, he dashed as fast as his feet would take him to Swara, and the one thing he did along with it was, he cursed Sanskar bad, he knew it that he was the reason for all this.
***
Ragini had finally calmed down, and was in a state to talk. Sanskar waited for her patiently, and when the sniff subsided, he went and sat down gently next to her, he gently held her shoulder and asked in the softest of voice, as to what happened that was so drastic that, her Lakshya decided to call off their relationship.
"It's that Swara, Sanskar! It always was and it always will be. She is the only reason why Lakshya, in spite of being mine, was never really mine. She was upset for God knows what reason today, and Lakshya was all over her, he blissfully forgot our six months anniversary! Whenever Lakshya is close to me, that bi**h does some drama and seeks his attention. I hate that drama queen Sanskar, I really do! I don't know what to do with her" she finished with choler in her eyes.
Sanskar looked away uncomfortably, as much as he adored Ragini, hearing her baselessly accuse Swara wasn't going down well with him. Ragini's hate for Swara was useless, she was innocent. She was upset because he, Sanskar was mean to her, how would she ever explain everything to Ragini now? He was just about to turn towards Ragini and open his mouth when Ragini spoke again. Sanskar gasped seeing her eyes roll in a maddening way, the look told him that Ragini had lost it and would go uptil any extent to get back her Lakshya. He shuddered seeing this slightly psychotic side of his once beloved sister-figure, but he kept quiet and allowed her to talk.
"That's it Sanskar, you go back to Swara! Making you guys break-up was the flaw in my plan, I was being impatient! It cost me too much! Now I have to fix this mess, so go back to Swara, lets resume the old plan, date her till Lakshya and I get married, then leave her, make sure you dump her the ugliest way, make sure to scar her permanently Sanskar, you will do it for me right?" she asked him earnestly.
Sanskar released his breath; he didn't know it was caught at the mere idea of cheating on Swara again. He hated standing where he did. On one hand was his sister like Ragini, who would be lost forever if she lost Lakshya and in the other hand was the sweet and innocent Swara whom he hopelessly loved, one had to be wasted to save the other - he hated being the decision-maker, he hated being the reason for abandoning one of the two most cherished relations in his life. But a decision had to be made and he had made it.
***
Lucky slowly entered her room. Her mother and dida were sitting on the couch opposite her bed, both looked tired and unkempt. She lay on the bed amidst a jungle of machineries, all beeping to herald she was still alive. A low shudder escaped him.
"Swags..." he called out without realizing. Ma and dida looked up at him, but Swags didn't, she was still unconscious.
Lucky slowly walked to the elderly ladies and sat down on his knees before them, with his head bent.
"How is she? What has happened?" he enquired gently. Her Ma told him that she was suffering from acute depression and also she was very stressed for a while, on that the mornings incident shook her to the core, and the collapsing was a result of all that combined. Lucky let out a sharp breath, it was all his fault. Swara had asked him to choose between her and Sanskar in the group, so long back - and for that evil Ragini, he had chosen Sanskar over her, this was a result of that - but he wasn't going to let Swara lose herself! Not when he finally got to know what his real feeling for Swags was - yes he didn't realize it himself, yes he needed dida to tell him that Swags loved him to realize how he felt, but whatever the means be, he knew now for sure, it was never Ragini - it was always her - Swags. Lucky's Swags.
He sighed, and looked up at Dida and Ma earnestly. "Dida, I know you don't like Marwari's because they according to you are two-faced, but trust me that's not why I chose the traditional Ragini over the modern sassy Swags. I was infatuated with Ragini, and Swags in my head was just my best friend. I never saw her as a lover. But the other day when you told me...I started to think on those lines, and trust me Dida, I never realized, but once I thought about it, I understood, it was always Swags Dida, no-one else." he shuddered, as Dida and Ma exchanged a surprise glance at each other. But then Lucky continued.
"But Dida, Ma, if you both have ever seen me like a son, I implore you to give me this one chance to make-up to her. I know she is not over Sanskar, but that guy is a jerk, and I won't let her waste herself on him. Will you both please help me in winning Swags back? The old sassy, smart-ass Swags?" he requested before them with folded palms. And eventually both Ma and Dida smiled.
***
"Say nah Sanskar, you will do this for me right?" asked Ragini again in desperation staring at Sanskar's stoic face.
He sighed out loud, and replied, "No". Ragini looked at him in surprise and anger. "No?" she repeated uncertainly.
Sanskar turned to her and began explaining things to her calmly, "I care for you Ragini, I truly do - hell do you think I would have done what I have done to Swara, if I didn't care for you? But do you care for me? If you did, would you not ask me once, how I was doing after my break-up with her? I bet you realized long time back that I have fallen in love with Swara - you know me too well to not see this. But what did you do? You chose to turn a blind eye towards my love for her? I dumped Swara for you, and you let me? A brother-sister relationship works two ways right Ragini? I still went ahead and did it for you, but you? Not only did you not recognize my love for Swara, but you came back again to ask me to ruin her? You want me to go back to her and leave her again? I am shocked at your hard heartedness Ragini. I still love you, and hope from all my heart that Lakshya comes back to you, but I wont do anything to further hurt my Swara. She has enough to deal with anyway, without me coming back to punish her for no apparent fault of hers. I love her, but I don't deserve her love, so I will stay away from her - and she? She will eventually move on and find a better man - I am out of this plan of your's Ragini - I am sorry"
Ragini could only stare incredulously at Sanskar - yes of course she noticed Sanskar's weakness for Swara, but how was she to encourage it? True, it would mean Swara would have a permanent existence in her and Lakshya's life, but not only that, she didn't approve of Swara for Sanskar - he deserved a better cultured girl than that Swara, she didn't want Swara in either of their life and that's why she detested her - but as fate would have it, both the men had abandoned her for Swara.
***
Swara was waking up to a muffled conversation around her, there was a male voice, and of two women. Aah, the women were Ma and Dida of course, but the man? Lucky? What was he doing there she wondered and tried battling with her heavy lids. "Ma.."she whispered, and soon enough the conversation around her stopped. She slowly opened her eyes to see three pair of eyes were staring down at her, with concern plastered all over their faces.
She was sitting on her bed and thinking; she had been discharged and brought home. Dida was making soup for her and Ma was setting the medicines in place. Lucky was hovering around until now, and had just left for home. His words lingered in her head - after she gained consciousness and they exchanged conversations on how she was doing, Lucky had informed her that he had broken up with Ragini and had no intentions of patching up, upon enquiry a muffled Lucky had replied that he never realized but he always loved Swags. Swara was surprised to say the least - after being with Sanskar, she had realized, the jealous feeling she had when Lucky didn't give her attention earlier, was because of their close friendship, it wasn't love - she fell in love to feel the difference - but now Lucky claimed he loved her? Was this jealousy or after being with Ragini for long enough he realized he never loved her but Swags? Swags had kept quiet, she hadn't responded, she didn't know what to say - she didn't want to hurt Lucky, but she knew it in her heart that Sanskar was irreplaceable - Lucky would never have that place. Now as she sat thinking, Dida came with her soup - she sat with her and gently explained how much Lucky loved her, and how he was childish and never realized his feelings for her - she said she and Ma approved of him and they knew she loved him at some point. She hardened while mentioning Sanskar and said he was worth no-one's attention and Swara was lucky to get rid of him - she told her if Swara accepted Lucky, no one would be happier than her and Ma.
Swara looked up surprised. So much had changed in such a short while. The Lucky who was madly in love with Ragini hated her now, Dida who hated Marwari's wanted her to accept Lucky, Sanskar who loved her, was so far from her, and she, would she be able to break Lucky's, Didia's and Ma's heart by rejecting Lucky? If not, would she be able to love him like she loved Sanskar? She didn't know these answers - only one thing was clear, she didn't love Lucky that way, and oh another thing was clear too, though in the heart of hearts, Sanskar wasn't replaceable, he didn't deserve her either - she wasn't ever going to go back to him.
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