Posting second part soon without sending PMs.. coz I got time to write.. and wasnt sure if I would get this time again..😆
Part 2
"You won't understand Angraj what it is to fight against your own people.. your own brothers... the one you have grown up with and the ones who have held your hand while you were growing up.. " Yudhisthir immersed in lot of emotions just managed to say these words to Angraj not realizing what his words echoed in Karna's heart. He looked at his brother gently and smiled saying to himself... What does he know?
They are your enemies in battleground, a fact that you should not forget Dharmraj.. You are right... I can't understand what you are saying but even if I could ... I would still see my enemies as my enemies..
Was he trying to say to himself or Dharmraj...? He didn't know but he knew that if he looked at them as elder brother would see. He would never be able to raise weapons at all... forget raising weapons. He would form that shield around them that no harm could even touch them.. But it was not that easy for Karna to keep aside his newly found brotherly affection for his brothers and harbor same ill feelings that he had before truth was ever known to him.
"It's easy for you to say.. You don't have your own standing against you in war.." Yudhisthir replied while looking straight into Karna eyes...
He swallowed a lump that came in his throat and turned his eyes away looking far into battlefield.. His silence baffled Yudhisthir for a while.
"Angraj Karna Are you alright?" Yudhisthir came closer to him and tried understanding those speaking emotions on his face.
"Sometimes in life we may find ourselves in situation where it is important to do right thing even if it shatters your soul into pieces and gives excruciating pain deep inside.. Still it's our duty to do what is right for our dharma.. You are right Dharmraj I don't have my own standing against me... but it's me who is standing against them... and that you can't understand...You would have some good memories with your loved ones.. I was the unlucky one who never got even a chance at those memories...and knowing well that I will never get even a chance too ...I am ready to fight for its my duty to do so.." Karna looked back at him...Tears had dried in eyes themselves... refusing to come out as he had wished...but Karna did wish.. he would not have let this much out ... he felt vulnerable at that time... still stood tall as he knew ...his brother needed him at this moment...
"You are fighting against your own?" Yudhisthir unable to understand what he meant... he wanted to probe further.. More because he suddenly got interested in knowing this unknown weakness of the man who he admired for amazing courage and mental strength. He had never seen him this vulnerable. Though Karna was hiding his tears inside...Somewhere his brother could recognize hidden pain in that voice... Suddenly Yudhisthir realized that Karna might never open his wound in front of him like he did. After all He is mighty Karna...but his words strike back to him... He was so right in what he told him... it was about doing the right thing.. Not about winning or losing more.. He knew it deep inside it too ..all answers lied within himself..
"You are right Angraj. This is my duty towards my motherland.. my people.. I must fight for my dharma and right. I might never forgive myself later but I deserved this.. to loathe myself forever"
"It's not your fault Yudhisthir that this war is taking place..." Karna first time took his first name ... Yudhisthir got surprised but felt like his own father perhaps was speaking to him... He didn't know why he felt this sudden urge to reach out to his feet.. He was skeptical though.. Karna might not like it.. But his eyes showed his gratitude..
Errm.. I mean Dharmraj Yudhisthir..Karna corrected quickly as he read Yudhisthir's eyes.
"There is something I have never told you Angraj... I have always looked up to you as elder brother.. I wished I had one like you.. My brothers often look up to me when in trouble and it makes me feel responsible at all time for being that father to them. That we lost so young.. They don't feel that void but I feel it all the time... " Yudhisthir could not control his tears this time...not realizing who was standing next to him..
He wanted to tell his brother so badly that he wished to be the elder brother he never had but his mother had snatched away that right from him long back... He must go from here in order to make it easy for Yudhisthir... He was making it hard for himself...
"Your father would be proud of you.. Now go and fight your battles Dharmraj.. and never forget this word of your enemy... I want this battle to be between equals.. though I don't consider you to be mine equal.. I wish you would come better prepared.." Karna tried to bring back his masked hatred...however it failed this time as Yudhisthir smiled instead of getting offended... This smile was genuine and full of warmth.. He was thanking him from his heart for the conversation they had tonight... His enemy had given these unsolicited blessings before the war he never could have dreamt of... but this relived his heart of burden he carried... Sometime we just need someone to tell us that everything is fine and sometime a gentle hand on your shoulder does that.Karna had given him that hand without saying much but with mere presence that night. Though he was his enemy he wished that day for once Karna was on their side.He was not in their side but he didnt know that he was not on other side as well..
He took leave from there greeting Karna in the most humble manner... though he stopped and looked back at his feet curiously before going to Pandavas side.
One heart got relieved while other one was crushed to million pieces whose cries would never ever be heard... He looked at the man walking away from him... His hands raised and blessed...!
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