*From & To Sathish* - Thread 4 - Page 89

Vaanathai Pola 34

“The best men tell you the truth because they think you can take it; the worst men either try to preserve you in some innocent state with their false protection or are ‘brutally honest.’ When someone tells, lets you think for yourself, experience your own emotions, he is treating you as a true equal, a friend…And the best men cook for you.” Whitney Otto

V.K.Singh trusted Raman to the core and yet he glanced a few times, checking to see how his new recruit was holding up after the frank and open talk back in his room. He felt a bit sad for he knew and had personally seen the close bonds that Raman shared with his family, especially with his wife, Jeeva. But, this was something that Raman had to handle and process by himself and there was nothing he could do about it.

For, as far as V.K.Singh was concerned, it was either sink or swim when it came to matters of national security and he would not and would never compromise that oath, never and not even for Raman.

They checked into the Indira Gandhi International Airport and were informed by the staff of Air India that the flight would depart on time and at 9.25 pm.

Both Raman and V.K.Singh finished their security check and with nothing else to do for the next two hours decided to chat over a cup of coffee and finding a nearly empty coffee lounge, chose seats that were farthest from the entrance and that which could also give them both a vantage point from where they could keep an eye on who was coming and going.

Raman found it a bit amusing that his boss was positioning himself and also that he was resorting to such methods in their own airport.

General V.K.Singh catching the ghost of the amusement that flickered and then quickly vanished on Raman's face leaned forward and said, ' turn very slowly and casually and take a look at the couple who are sitting at the table at the entrance of this coffee lounge and tell me what you make of them.'

Sipping his coffee, V.k.Singh raised an eyebrow and smiled over the rim of the cup and whispered, ' take your time, Ram for we have a lot of time to kill and we might as well make it interesting and also double it as your practical class.'

Raman took his time and looked at the white couple and then after a few moments turned slowly back to face his boss and taking a sip from his own cup, ' newly married and in their early or mid-thirties. Reasonably well to do and yet are careful with their money. Maybe, they are on a delayed honeymoon trip but definitely were here as tourists and with their holiday done with are now returning back to their country.'

' Why do you think they are tourists?'

' well, the Christmas holidays were followed by the New year and so I am very sure that they came here to India to spend those holidays here.'

V.K.Singh nodded approvingly, ' okay. But, where did they spend their time here?'

Raman replied instantly, ' Goa and although that is a cliched thought and assumption, I say that with conviction from their tanned bodies.'

' very good Ram but can you tell me as to which country they are from?'

Raman strained his ears and listened carefully to the soft chatting sounds of the white couple and replied 'The united states of America.'

' How did you manage to come to the conclusion, Ram?'

' sir, obviously from their accents and their clothing and not to forget the New York Yankees baseball cap that the man is wearing.'

V.K.Singh smiled and shook his head, ' sorry but they are both Russian spies.'

Raman knew that he was being taught how to see,what to learn, understand and how to react to the knowledge, ' I am sorry boss but my training has not only been short but has been mostly inside closed doors and much about assessing the information and other data that is in our possession. So,please.'

V.K.Singh placed both his hands on the table and said, ' Ram, I know they work for the Russian state department for I met them a few weeks back regarding some minor diplomatic matters and also in context of our Defence ministers trip to Moscow.'

Raman thought, ' you cheat' and V.K.Singh smiled, ' sorry my lad but this is not about me knowing the answer to the question and only about you learning more about your craft.'

Taking a large sip from his cup of coffee, he looked at the cup and said ' not bad for an airport cafe.'

' Ram, if you observe them both very carefully, you will see that the man is in khaki shorts and a tee and is just in his leather sandals while his partner is in a short dress and is obviously not wearing a bra. Look at the tan and see that is total and complete and there are no bra marks on her shoulders and chest and that means she lay completely nude while getting tanned under the sun.'

Raman shook his head, ' Nude bathing has been banned for many years in Goa now and so that means they stayed in the Russian part of the Goan paradise where they are given a huge leeway and are left to their own means and games.'

' Right you are my boy and pretty quick on the take too.'

V.K.Singh looked at Raman with a serious face,' Forget them and we will talk about the trip we are taking for there are a few things that you need to know about Israel as they are unlike any other country in the intelligence business and I am telling you this for I have been dealing with them for nearly 20 years now.'

Good morning. I wish you a beautiful day. All the best.

Silent.Silence. Stillness of thoughts but not to the point of being frozen and cold.

When you realize that it makes not any difference telling, sharing your thoughts, fears, pain and sorrow with other souls, the natural recourse is to become silent. Like a cow chewing cud, it is better to ruminate in solitude lest you soil others day and time.

Some tell me to take it easy, be cool and not struggle and think so much about life and my eyes widen and my brows raise themselves to the center point of my skull and I think, ' what? But, how, when there is so little time and even that is not guaranteed.'

' All is well. Picture abhi bakki hai' are all nice to see and hear but the truth is ' Kal ho na ho.'

"Kyunki har ghadi badal rahi hai."

हर घड़ी बदल रही है रूप ज़िंदगी

छाँव है कभी, कभी है धूप ज़िंदगी

हर पल यहाँ जी भर जियो

जो है समाँ कल हो न हो

But wait, what is that song that keeps echoing in my soul?

ஒவ்வொரு பூக்களுமே சொல்கிறதே

வாழ்வென்றால் போராடும் போர்க்களமே

ஒவ்வொரு விடியலுமே சொல்கிறதே

இரவானால் பகல் ஒன்று வந்திடுமே

நம்பிக்கை என்பது வேண்டும் நம் வாழ்வில்

லட்சியம் நிச்சயம் வெல்லும் ஒரு நாளில்

மனமே ஓ மனமே நீ மாறிவிடு

மலையோ அது பனியோ நீ மோதி விடு

He that has eyes to see and ears to hear may

convince himself that no mortal can keep a secret.

If his lips are silent, he chatters with his fingertips;

betrayal oozes out of him at every pore. —SIGMUND FREUD,

Silent as the cold, cold grave.

dark as the darkest night.

resolute as the tallest and rockiest mountain

and yet the thoughts ooze out, seep through

the flimsy armour and walls

words, words my lovelies. words are but the forms of thoughts that seep from the deepest parts of the soul. words betray for they are enemies of, kind and gentle souls, and words are but translations of memories of pain, burden, deep longing and sorrow and words are in the end just testimonies and wills.

But, words are cowards for they do not translate properly the writer's thoughts as his soul censors his release of emotions and just like a ripe fruit exploding in your hands, leaving you dirty and stained, words too, most of the time are a pale shadow and a poor reflection of the writer and his soul.

Nay, I shall henceforth not write and reveal my heart, I proclaim to one but myself for I dare do that only in the solitude of my own soul and my shadows.

The fingers type, translate the yearnings and howls of souls when quills and ink did the same over centuries.

What do we pine for? who do we cry for if not ourselves and we cry for it is the right thing to do and the only thing you are allowed to do.

But, when you cannot cry, you write and hide behind the words, your pain slipping and sliding along the sentences and a story is told and a deed is done.

I have sought the spring that is never dry and always bestows happiness and in faith, drink from it with cupped hands and yet the water tastes foul and quenches not my thirst.

A thirst for redemption. A journey of redemption and I sadly see messages and e-mails saying I have points on my cards and online sites where I can redeem them.

Alas, if only there were credit points in life where one can redeem oneself.

Vaanathai Pola 35

“Wherever you find a great man, you will find a great mother or a great wife standing behind him -- or so they used to say. It would be interesting to know how many great women have had great fathers and husbands behind them.” Dorothy L. Sayers, Gaudy Night

Raman leaned back into the chair and V.K.Singh spoke just one word, ' Israel' with the utmost of seriousness and that was all he spoke or could speak for Raman's mobile rang with a song, a Tamil song and he knew who was calling.

Nodding to Raman, he got up and indicated that he was going to the smoker's lounge and would be back in a few minutes time.

Raman picked up the phone and said, ' Hi Jeeva.'

' you took your time answering.'

' Sorry. I am really sorry about that. In fact, I was just about to call you. How are you doing, sweetie?'

Her reply was drowned out by the loud announcement that filled the airport and everyone's ears that heard it and in sadly for Raman, it was heard loud and clear by' Your kind attention, please. This is the final boarding call for all passengers flying to London on Lufthansa airways.'

It took a few moments for the announcement to end and it took a further few moments for Jeeva to speak,'You are in the airport. But, why did I hear London being mentioned? So that means, you are at the international airport? what are you doing there in Delhi's international airport, Ram? Are you flying out of the country?'

Raman knew the law very well and he had been a successful lawyer not because of his knowledge about the law but also because he knew when to speak and when not to speak and importantly what to speak and how to speak it.

But, all that knowledge flew right out of the proverbial window and he now realized for the very first time, standing in the airport and having been asked a question, just what an ordinary and below average advocate felt in the court when facing the Judge and importantly facing the opposition lawyer who was far superior to him and in Raman's case, he had seen hundreds of those kind going against him and losing badly,very badly and then he had never seen them again, ever.

If he felt his situation had turned tricky and nasty with the questions that Jeeva had just asked, his situation became even more complicated as his boss V.K.Singh returned and sat back in his chair and proceeded to stare at him pointedly and with great curiosity.

Raman closed his eyes and recollected his Mentor, the legendary Krishnaswamy's advice, ' Ram, poise and careful presentation always wins out. Truth is good. Truth is the ultimate answer. But, even truth has to be handled carefully and with great tact and presented with care. That is how you win over people' and Raman remembered correcting him, ' Sir, you mean cases, right?' and his mentor had shaken his head and had replied, ' people, Ram. For, in the end, the sitting, presiding judge over your case is a human being after all and his word is final. Your clients are human beings and the opposing advocates are human beings. A lot of cases can be settled amicably if people can just talk it out and work it out with care and tact.'

' Ram, cat got your tongue baby. I asked you a question and you are taking your own sweet time with the answer.'

' Jeeva, I am sorry sweetie, really sorry for not calling you earlier and informing you about this sudden trip. Please, forgive me this time and I promise you that in future, I will always keep you in the loop. Just that, this trip came up suddenly and it came up because it concerns matters of vital importance.'

Jeeva did not scream or yell out her reply but instead spoke calmly and Raman felt her quiet, sarcastic tone was far worse than her letting loose her fiery anger.

' Matters of vital importance. What are you now, James bond? off to save India when you have a fully pregnant wife. Do you mean to tell me that you are so valuable that you cannot be replaced by someone else from your department, more experienced than you?'

Raman looked at his boss V.K.Singh who seemed to be getting great pleasure from the conversation that he was having with Jeeva and with a smile, pressed the speaker button.

' what's wrong with that bloody old man who is your boss? what is his name? Pk, Vk or something. Stupid idiot. couldn't he find some other person for this trip? What is wrong with him? I think he is a sadist for choosing you when he knows pretty well that I am pregnant. All of us have yet to recover from what happened with that assassin couple and already he is sending you on trips regarding work. Is he that insensitive?'

Raman covered his lips and tried hard to stifle the laughter that began to bubble from his lips for his boss who had been just moments ago enjoying himself, now looked like someone who needed to pee badly and was squirming uncomfortably in his chair.

Raman took another deep breath and spoke softly and lovingly, ' I love you Jeeva. No matter how you yell at me or scream at me, it matters not for I love you so much and nothing matters more than you. Even your scoldings are like kisses to me for I was starved of hearing your voice and I was so starved that even your angry tone and words are like feathers and petals falling on me.'

Jeeva's voice came loud and clear, ' you, you. What are you trying to do, you silly man? you are at the airport and you are flirting with me. what if people around you hear all this?'

' I am not bothered about all that and I am bothered only about you and me.'

In a softened voice, Jeeva said, ' I know baby. But, I can't help not worrying about you. You are everything to me and I am nothing without you.'

' I know that Jeeva and I too am because of you.'

In a much calmer sounding voice, Jeeva asked, ' when will you be back?'

' In a few days time. At the most three to four days time. If the work is done before that, I will return immediately, I promise.'

' Okay. I know that you are not supposed to talk or give out details about your work. So, take care sweetie and all the best. But, I promise you one thing..'

' What is it baby?'

' The next time that boss of yours happens to be at our place, I am surely going to mix something in the coffee or food that I myself will serve him and see to it that he spends the rest of his career in the bathroom, moaning and groaning in pain.'

Raman let loose his laughter unable to hold it back and also seeing the dramatic effect it had just had on his boss.

' Okay, Jeeva. As long as you don't serve me the same thing that you might serve my boss cos I want to spend the rest of my life in your arms and not in the bathroom.'

Jeeva too laughed and slowly they chatted about family.

Raman ended the call after a few moments and looked at V.K.Singh who said, ' that wife of yours, she is really scary.'

' that should teach you not to eavesdrop on anyone, even if it is your subordinate and especially not when they are having a private conversation.'

V.K.Singh looked startled, ' WTF, you were the one who put the conversation on speaker mode?'

' True and which I wouldn't have been forced to do if you had not come back so hurriedly from your smoking which I know very well you will not miss, not even if God made an appearance in front of you. So, if you came back so quickly and without smoking, it means you were being naughty and also curious to see how I would handle my wife who was on a warpath. So, like that ancient proverb," Curiosity killed the cat", you got what you deserved. pretty fair I think.'

Both looked at each other and smiled and V.K.Singh clapped, ' Bravo, my young prodigy. Bravo indeed.'

Pointing to Raman's mobile, he asked, ' that ringtone was very melodious. I know it was a Tamil song for I have heard it a long time ago. Is it a film song?'

Raman took out his phone and tapped on the youtube app and typed in the words and once the video came on, pressed play and placed his phone in front of V.K.Singh.

The video began to play.

Oru Naalum Unai Maravaatha Inithaana Varam Vendum

Uravaalum Udal Uyiraalum Piriyaatha Varam Vendum

Oru Naalum Unai Maravaatha Inithaana Varam Vendum

Uravaalum Udal Uyiraalum Piriyaatha Varam Vendum

Vizhiyoadu Imai Poalae Vilagaatha Nilai Vendum

Enaiyaalum Ejamaane Enaiyaalum Ejamaane

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vdsq8tzgPrE

Vaanathai Pola 36

Jeeva slowly made her way back to the dining table from the hall window where she had gone to call Raman and talk to him in total privacy and saw that the two sets of parents were playing cards and as always her father Mani was winning nearly every game and his winnings was like a small mound on the table and growing while the others had nearly lost all their cash. They played for high stakes, high in their opinion and sweet and cute in her opinion for they played with old 5 paisa and ten paisa coins as stakes. Each of them had about 30 to 40 coins and with that, they played either 3 cards and Rummy.

Jeeva slowly slipped into the chair and placing her mobile on the table sat with placing her head in her hands.

Valliammai, Shaktivel, Kamakshi and Manigandan one by one folded their cards and placing it on the table looked at each other worriedly and at the same time wondering if they should talk to her and at the same time wondering who would go talk to her.

Kamakshi whispered, ' She is my child but I am not very sure about that for she has always treated me like a child and I am sure that I will not be able to cope with her counters and logic.

Valliammai looked at Shaktivel who shook his head, indicating to her that it was better to leave her alone at least for now as she was exhibiting all signs of a major release of energy which in Jeeva's case was anger.

But, Manigandan had no such fear and even if he was a bit unsure how to broach his child, his instincts to see her well and happy, especially now that she was nearly fully pregnant overcame those fears and he pressed a button and the electric wheelchair moved at a brisk space towards Jeeva.

Maybe she heard them speak or maybe she heard the whining noise her father's wheelchair made, for they all watched Jeeva lift her head up and tell her dad in a soft but threatening voice,' dei Mani, Please, poyidu da and let me chill for a few moments.'

Both father and daughter looked at each other and then Manigandan said, ' okay da, chellam. But, remember that I am here and all of us are here for you in case you need to talk or just unload your thoughts.'

Jeeva thanked her dad,' Thanks, da Mani.'

Manigandan smiled and said, ' Jeevama, I have not told you this in a few days. I am sorry ma. Is it okay if I say it now before going away and leaving you all alone in your world and to face and go through whatever it is you are going through at this moment.'

A sob escaped Jeeva's lips and they quivered in pain and in the same rhythmic beat as her eyelashes and Mani ignoring them said, ' I just wanted to tell you that I love you very much. More than I love your mother and more than anything else in this world. I am getting old and find myself always tired from this arthritis and so often forget to tell my beautiful child that her sick father is still there and that his soul is still strong and full of love and affection for her.'

Jeeva burst out crying and getting up from her chair sat down on her father's lap and buried her head in his shoulder and sobbed pitifully.

Manigandan held her tightly and kissing her head spoke to her like he used to speak to her when she just a tiny kid.

' Ennada chellam. Yaaru enna sonnanga en kanmaniya. Appa kitta sollu. Nalla odhai kudukkaren.'

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ptzw2c1k0fw

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7hdxyLFk3_8

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0AqW1YpIR2o&list=PLMkEJAUO0qk5K4e8BVTZKkrmNls_sn7t4&index=2

Vaanathai Pola 37

It is the gentle breeze on a hot summer day. It is the first rains that bring joy and hope to summer scorched souls. It is a large, shady tree in a desert. It is the sweet water-filled pool that shimmers like a jewel in an oasis. It is the invisible bond that is stronger than steel and rarer than the rarest of elements. It is poetry. It is a classic. It is God. It is love and it can be felt in the soul and can only be felt through the hands that speak that love.

Jeeva began to sob like a child and Manigandan held his grown-up daughter in his arms and on his feeble legs and let her cry for he knew that sometimes that it is better to cry than carry it as a burden in your soul.

Slowly, her sobs began to subside and the Jeeva lifted her head from her father's shoulder and wiping her tears looked at him and gently pecked both sides of his cheeks with her lips and said, ' I love you da, Mr.Manigandan.'

' Please ma'am, no formalities between me and you. So, it is just Mani.'

She quickly got up realising his arthritic knees and hips must be taking a hell of a beating and sinking to her knees began to massage his thighs and calves and Mani told her in a soft voice, ' Baby, I swear on you and our dead Suja that I felt no pain while you sat on my lap and cried on my shoulder and in fact, I feel a lot better now than before. Maybe, from today, it will be better if you sit on my lap every day like you and Suja used to do when you were children after my return from work.'

He fell silent and Jeeva saw that it was the turn of his eyes to fill with tears and she quickly got up and hugged him and said, ' sorry pa. I am really sorry for being such a cry baby and creating this scene. See, now, I have made you cry too.'

Manigandan looked at her and smiling gently through his tears, said, ' These tears are more of joy and with only a tinge of sadness.'

Jeeva looked at him pathetically for she felt sadder hearing her ailing dad even speak of sadness, even if it was just a tinge, a bit.

Manigandan said, ' Don't look so worried. When you sat on my lap, I also remembered the time when Kamakshi was fully pregnant with Suja and she and you both used to sit on my lap and you used to talk to Suja and feel her kick and respond to your voice. That memory suddenly came to mind and overwhelmed me.'

Shaktivel asked Jeeva with a concerned and worried voice, ' Did Raman say something to hurt you?'

She looked at him and then at all of them slowly and then returning her gaze to Shaktivel smiled naughtily and replied, 'that is a trick question, right, appa?'

Shaktivel panicking hurriedly said,' Jeeva, that was no trick question and only asked out of concern for you and your welfare. For, it breaks our heart to see you sad and crying.'

Jeeva wiping her tears, ' okay, I will talk in Raman's lingo. Your objection is sustained but I will ask you a question in return for your question and you and the others will answer it honestly?'

All four parents nodded and chorused,' okay.'

' Do you honestly, in full faith and with complete knowledge about Raman's character and soul think that he is capable of saying something that would hurt me?'

All of them fell silent and Mani looked at her curiously and said with conviction, ' No. Never, and I am sure if he did that then he must have had a good reason for it and you most probably deserved it.'

Jeeva clapped her hands and said, ' perfect answer and full points boss.'

She took a deep breath and sighed and said, ' I thought he was flying back today but he is not and I think that he is, in fact, flying out of the country as we speak.'

Valliammai taken aback, ' what? flying out of the country? for what and why didn't he inform you or any of us?'

Manigandan softly said, ' Valliammai, Have you forgotten that your son is not an advocate anymore and have you also forgotten who he works for and what his work means?'

All of them fell silent and Jeeva spoke, ' I know and understand perfectly well what he is, who he is and what the nature of his job is and yet I miss him terribly. I know that I am being selfish and maybe over-possessive but I am not normal right now and I am carrying two souls and the delivery date is nearing and nearing very quickly.'

Tears began to trickle down her cheeks and she said, ' I don't mean any offence to you all but being next to him and in his arms is totally a different thing and I feel safe and complete. Sometimes, I feel that both Suja and Vijay are crying inside, missing their father's voice for although I cannot see or hear them cry, I feel their distress and longing when Raman is not around and their distress and pain along with my own longing for him becomes too much to bear and handle and ' pointing to her face, ' that is why I am crying. I am crying not just for me but also for my babies.'

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pdXZJ6dsaW4

Vaanathai Pola 38

The buildings of The Flock had been built at a distance from the main road and so the sounds of the vehicles and all the other noises that came from the life that lay outside the boundary barely reached its walls.

It was nearly 10.00 pm in the night and Radha Krishnan sat on the footsteps that led into the main building of The Flock and he sat as he was known to sit by people who worked with him, ' Still, like a leopard lying hidden among the branches of the tree.Still, as the tree and still as death.'

He sat wondering if he had the time to do what he had come to do and which was to find the people behind the horrific attack on his Father and who might just soon succumb to his injuries.

Radhu's thoughts took him back to the father, the great soul who had taken on that role willingly and he smiled gently and with immense love and gratitude filling his soul.

' Abba, May God always protect you and keep you by his side for you truly are his angel and messenger. In a world full of hatred and greed, you were not only a father to me but a protector and guardian angel to both me and my Ammi. If I have ever hurt you or offended you, please forgive this child of yours and bless me from the heavens where you are right now.

I don't know if I can ever match your deeds and don't even want to but I really wish that you had been here so that I could have told you how much you meant to me and how grateful that I am to you.

I am going to use all that love that you showered on me as a source of inspiration and try to do my best to take care and watch over these children as you watched over Ammi and me.

Bless me father and watch over me and all those who reign over my soul.'

Even in the stillness of his thoughts and even though he was far away with his late fathers' memories, Radhu heard the soft footfalls of tiny feet and knowing very well who they belonged to said in strict but teasing tone, ' little lambs should not go wandering in the dark for big bad wolves are always prowling and waiting for an easy meal.'

The tiniest voice of Appu whimpered but boldly, ' not here for you are there to protect us, master.'

Radhu turning sideways saw the same arrangement of the three, standing and peeping from behind the door. The bottom pup was Appu and above him was his older brother Pappu and standing protectively, shielding them behind her was Meena and all he could see was their three heads sticking out like Owls from their hole of home in a dried and dead tree.

' what are you doing wandering at this late hour when you should be in bed fast asleep?'

Appu and Pappu looked up at Meena who said, ' We are not able to sleep without Big sir for he always used to sing his favourite song and slowly put us to sleep.'

Radhu thought and then nodding his head said, ' okay. If I sing that song will you all fall asleep and not wander around and disturb me?'

All three of them began to laugh and Appu slapped his forehead endearingly and squeaked, ' master, you are April fool for you don't know what ours and big sirs song is?'

Radhu thought seriously and getting up to his feet replied, ' at least give me a chance to try and we will see what I can do? Now, come along and get into your beds while I think what your lullaby is.'

Thangamani master smiled at this sweet moment and also smiled for he knew that his instincts had been bang on and in the darkened room sat silently waiting and wondering what the new head of The Flock was going to do and what magic rabbit he was going to pull out of his bag.

But he was taken aback, shocked, moved and stunned into silence for a strong but melodious voice filled the halls of The Flock and filled the souls of not only that of tiny tots but that of grown-up men too as Radhu sang his Ammi's song that she had sung to him from the time he had been in her womb and the same song that his father had sung to her a few times when they had both been together, a long time ago.

காக்கைச் சிறகினிலே நந்தலாலா-நின்றன்

கரியநிறந் தோன்றுதையே நந்தலாலா;

பார்க்கு மரங்கலெல்லாம் நந்தலாலா -நின்றன்

பச்சைநிறந் தோன்றுதையே நந்தலாலா;

கேட்கு மொலியிலெல்லாம் நந்தலாலா - நின்றன்

கீத மிசைக்குதடா நந்தலாலா;

தீக்குள் விரலைவைத்தால் நந்தலாலா-நின்னைத்

தீண்டுமின்பம்ந் தோன்றுதடா நந்தலாலா.

kaakai siraginile nandhalala - nindran

kariya niram thondrudhaiye -nandhalala;

paarku marangalellam nandhalala - nindran

pachai niram thondrudhaiye nandhalala

kekum oliyil ellam nandhalala - nindran

geetham isaikudhada nandhalala;

theekkul viralai vaithal nandhalala - ninnaith

theendum inbam thondrudhada nandhalala

Radhu stopped singing for tiny and tender arms garlanded his neck and body and Appu, Pappu and Meena cried and whimpered, ' Big sirs song. Big sirs song. You are Big sir.'

In the darkness of his room, Thangamani thought, ' you have come home, kind sir, and yet I wonder who it is that has come home to The Flock.

Vaanathai Pola 39

Radhu stayed a long time after Appu, Pappu and Meena fell asleep and covering them with a thick blanket, he rose and left the room to go to his room. He had been given the room which stood as the dead-end of the corridor and as he went towards it, he heard a door being opened and turned to see who it was that was awake at this late hour.

The door that had opened was the one of Thangamani master, and it was the one next to the where the children lay deep in slumber and coming out he slowly walked towards Radha Krishnan.

' Any person who can sing as well as you and also sing the song of those three elves are okay in my book.'

He looked searchingly at Radhu's face and then with a smile, said, ' You have my complete co-operation and support and you can call on me for any help that you may need.'

Radhu accepted his offer with a nod and thanked him and then both wished each other Good night and went to their rooms.

Leaving the door open, Radhu sat on the bed and sat staring out of the window for a long time.

In the darkness of the night, Radhu saw that the moon was waning and just a sliver and slice of its original appearance.

' Light and dark. Shadows and games and as usual I am in its epicentre.'

The darkness of the room was lit up by the screen of his mobile coming alive and he saw that it was a message from his friend in Kumbakonam.

Radhu also tapped the Green logo of the Whatsapp symbol that had a crown of red indicating a new message.

He took his time and read the SMS first and then went through Whatsapp messages carefully and smiled to himself and thought, ' So, it is not just Kavita Duraipandi Arumugam but the state of Tamil Nadu's Cabinet Minister Kavita Duraipandi Arumugam.'

Another SMS came in and Radhu tapped and opened the message.

' Information sanitised and that means she is under the security of the Intelligence wing and which in turn means danger and which also means that under your circumstances, it is best that you leave the person alone and give her a wide berth in future.Please google where you will find more detailed articles about her and her family and her late brother.'

Radhu instantly connected the words late brother and the lost look in Kavita's eyes.

Sitting in the bed and leaning comfortably against the pillow that he had propped against the wall, he tapped on the google chrome browser in his phone and googled the name Kavita Duraipandi Arumugam and instantly images and articles filled the screen.

The very first article's headlines screamed ' Vijay Bhaskar murdered in Delhi' and they kept coming and then came an article that instantly caught his attention, ' Army intelligence chiefs daughter murdered along with Vijay Bhaskar.'

Radha Krishnan sat late into the night reading all the material that he could find on google and learnt almost everything that had happened that night in Delhi when Kavita's brother Vijay had been shot dead along with Poornima, Brigadier Sooryanarayanan's only daughter.

Slowly the plot pulled itself together and revealed itself in its entirety to Radhu's mind and he knew what had happened and why it happened and how it had happened.

But, one person kept popping up here and there in the images but always in the background. Yet, even though he remained in the background merging with heads and shoulders and shadows, Radhu recognised an Alpha and spent a long time before he got the name of the person and whispered, ' Raman. Who are you Mister and why is information about you and your family so hard to find?'

Then he found a photo of Raman along with Brigadier Sooryanarayanan and with them was a person he had met a long time ago. A very long time ago, in very different circumstance and in a different place, far from Chennai.

' V.K.Singh.But, what are you doing with Raman?'

Radhu smiled and nodded, ' So,Mr.Raman, you are part of the Government and belong to the intelligence department. If V.K.Singh is there with you then that means you are working for RAW.'

Vaanathai Pola 40

A crime is a puzzle. It is a jumbled ball of knots and both the ends are missing. It is a maze where you find yourself right in the middle not knowing where the entrance or exit is.

For Radhu, the attack on his Father, Brigadier Rajashekar Varma who now lay in a come was very similar to a puzzle, a maze and a thread full of knots.

He had seen The Flock's peon Shekar, acting suspiciously and talking to someone earlier in the day and he had known instantly that his first move was to find out more about Shekar and who he had spoken to. His instinct told him that Shekar must surely be councillor Rangaswamy's man, stooge, mole and who had been placed there for information. This had been proved very clearly with the councillors arrival at the Flock, soon after he and Girija had reached there.

' Who could have given that information if not Shekar?' thought Radhu and then seeing the time was 2.00 am, he slowly closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep.

But, Radhu slept unlike most members of the human species and like his brethren, brothers in arms, dogs of war, he had developed and perfected the art of sleeping with his eyes closed and ears open. Like an animal, much like a dog that sleeps but keeps one or both ears cocked for sound, Radhu slept with a part of his sensory brain wide awake.

Whispers, hushed whispers and he woke up instantly in the darkness of his room and wide awake. Lying dead still, he concentrated his entire brain and processed the sounds coming through the door and knew and recognised the whispers belonged to Shekar, Radhu carefully rose from the bed and placing his feet on the floor, got up like a cat.

On toes that would have embarrassed a feline he tip-toed along the corridor stuck to the wall like a spider and hugging the shadows, he slowly made his way and approached the room of Shekar, the peon.

' Sir, what I am trying to say is that he sang the same song that the brigadier used to sing and I know it very well for I heard it every day the past few months. Okay, sir. I don't think he is going to be too much of a problem sir but it is better to move now and end this once and for all.'

There was a pause in the conversation and Radhu knew that the man on the other end was talking and then Shekar spoke, ' okay sir, a few more days is okay with me sir. But, you have to end this soon sir. Sir, thank you for the money. My wife told me that it has reached her account. Okay, sir.'

Having heard enough to incriminate Shekar, Radhu slowly slipped back to his room and began to plot his moves.

An elderly Chinese woman had two large pots, each hung on the ends of a pole, which she carried across her neck. One of the pots had a crack in it while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water, at the end of the long walk from the stream to the house, the cracked pot arrived only half full. For a full two years, this went on daily, with the woman bringing home only one and a half pots of water.

Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments. But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection and miserable that it could only do half of what it had been made to do. After 2 years of what it perceived to be bitter failure, it spoke to the woman one day by the stream. “I am ashamed of myself because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your house.”

The old woman smiled, “Did you notice that there are flowers on your side of the path, but not on the other pot’s side?” “That’s because I have always known about your flaw, so I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back, you water them. For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate the table. Without you being just the way you are, there would not be this beauty to grace the house.”

Each of us has our own unique flaw. But it’s the cracks and flaws we each have that make our lives together so very interesting and rewarding.