Crisp Bytes SC - 12th July 13 - Page 13

smrth, I suppose we all are taking a gamble here, becoming so invested in something so 'fickle' chiefly because as you've pointed out, it remains at the mercy of much anticipated and unforeseen elements... And it is indeed apt that you have pointed out the commercial nature of the enterprise... With the show confirmed under scanner, we may in the coming days witness just what effect this environment has on the creative work itself...

Iviewer, smrth, arshi & happychappy...

Going back to Freud...Kumud's 'ego' has roots in her childhood...
- she is the first born and has been the centre of attention all her life.
- she is obviously more than intelligent and talented (helps in fathers business, teaches, paints, writes poetry, is a great cook).
- she has been the first in everything at least in the Desai household and consequently is the benchmark that all siblings look up to or try to emulate.
- being first - born, she has been pampered and indulged ...even outside the Desai parivar (getting internet to the village, fighting against what she thinks is superstition, gau hatya).
- she knows she is attractive.
- she is Daddy's Little Girl.

Her high self-esteem gives her a very healthy ego.
Due to all of the above, she is the alpha female.

An alpha male / female is generally narcissistic and views the world ONLY through his / her own prism - you are either with them or against them...and if you are against them (i) they will go all out to change your point of view or (ii) they will pick you up and throw you out of their pretty universe.

ALSO due to all of the above, she has a very clear sense of morality / principles / right & wrong; and is willing to defend it at ANY Cost - often jumping in instinctively and then thinking of the consequences.

Just listing the occasions:
1) The moment saras sent her the letter, her first instinct was - How dare you refuse to marry me? >>> You don't deserve me. I won't even show you my face >>> I dare you to come here and say no to my face... if you can't do that then say that to my parents. Even when he comes, she won't show her face till saras forces her to show it.

2) The whole fight with the village on getting internet to the village, against the town sacred pond, the gau hatya..

3) Once she's convinced she loves him, she actually goes to confront him for validation - the first hug (confront is maybe a wrong word, but the premise is the same...are you with me or not?)

4) The whole reaction when saras said no the 2nd time...after all her pleading her alpha nature takes over and she's 'ok if you are not with me, I am throwing you out of my life pronto'. I understand the context of the family prestige, but if she had said no to marriage with pramad..would the indulgent Desai family have gone against their favorite daughter? I tend to think no.

I also have a little theory why she fell for saras...alpha nature people respect only strength...everyone else is a second class citizen...fit to serve them, but never an equal.

I feel kumud fell for saras because all his behaviors were distinctly alpha nature during their initial interactions...the rejection, the taking up her dare to come to RN, the winning of their little competition to see her face, the taking over the gau hatya blame (what is right is right...you cannot take a fake mother promise that yash was going to do..the jump first for what you believe in then think of the consequences), the storm night, the pursuing...she had found her soulmate...

The fact that saras exhibited these behaviours BECAUSE he is a Beta not an Alpha did not occur to her...his dark past, his strong views on why he did not want to get hooked..was also percieved like an alpha trait...someone fighting for & against something because he believes in it...

when saras said no the second time...after all her pleading...was her alpha nature taking over and reacting as if to a 'second - class' beta citizen, despite her deep love for saras?...i.e. you are not like me at all? ...get out now...you don't deserve me types?

Which brings us to the current crossroads...
1) keeping all things same...their deep love, love for family, sense of right & wrong...still both have remained true and acted as per their inherent / core natures...she as an alpha and he as a beta...

2) the challenge for both is...kumud will have to learn how to be a beta >>> her days of loving indulgence, real loving, independence, being a leader are over or very much circumscribed at her in-laws place and by her husband... her first instinct will be to jump first and think of consequences later...which she won't be able to do...

saras will have to learn to be an alpha >>> the situation is more hopeless for him...he has lost kumud, kumud's own 'alpha powers' (for lack of a better word) which helped him earlier are severely circumscribed...he will have to draw on his resources to push the envelope / situation so that it becomes more livable / comfortable for kumud,,

3) and I guess that is where the maturity will come in...both are currently at extremes of their own nature...both need a correct mix of alpha-beta / yin-yang (another analogy perhaps) to survive...which is going to be extremely hard...and I guess that is where their deep love will be the catalyst / anchor / trigger / driver / whatever...This is the ONLY trigger which will force both to change for the better...

P.S.
sorry to have rambled...writing this from a social function from my phone...couldn't resist... people think I am writing some important office emails... :-)..posting this before I get caught...

oh this addiction!!!!

@smrth, iViewer, happychappy, hotdogg,

Just read the last posts and I am very happy to see some very critical and mature writing, which I miss from other posts. I am not very good with words (maths and science background, I am a mathematics professor at university)but appreciate the excellent critics.

Originally posted by: kiranpreethee

Just read the last posts and I am very happy to see some very critical and mature writing, which I miss from other posts. I am not very good with words (maths and science background, I am a mathematics professor at university)but appreciate the excellent critics.

Originally posted by: arshicritic

@smrth, iViewer, happychappy, hotdogg,

Natmastak, floored, fida!

Guys ... you are Brriiillianntt ... beyond Brriilllianttt ... 👏

Originally posted by: twila

Guys ... you are Brriiillianntt ... beyond Brriilllianttt ... 👏

What high Calibre discussions ... Amazing !! 👏

Such Indepth discussions about Human nature ... " the Building Blocks... " of human nature as IViewer has so succintly put ... THANK YOU !!

I really wonder if ever IF has seen discussions of this Intellectual level ...

and well this is the greatness of Classic works of ART... the TV show of course has to work under severe constraints ( as Smrth has so rightly mentioned ) but the source from which it originates ... that Classic ... they can stimulate so much thought ...

Shall be reading and re-reading for better assimilation ,,,,,,,,right now can only say Hats off to you Brrilliant people . 😊

and Thank You once again Arshi ... for giving such a wonderful platform . 😊

Happy! Stay my friend always please...😛

IViewer and happychappy just went through your amazing dialogues!👏...venturing some inputs

As noted then (that amazing 21st May episode), Cvs had directly adapted that amazing dialogue (with minor changes) on lotus pool from a profound passage by G.M.T. He was describing SC's effect on Kumud after his first visit to RN.

Dialogue in the serial:

"Tumhari Chhabi pani main nahi utri, Jo ek tarang se bikhar jayegi,

Tumhari chhabi mere dil main utari hai,

Jise main khud bhi kabhi mita nahi paaongi."

After two three episodes they further grounded the point with S on her palm and she rushed to Idols...recalling some impressions I had then...

"That day, when S was stamped on her palm, what were Cvs trying to show? She rushed to her Gods. She was euphoric. Her palm upturned and she was imbibing a feeling. That man, his essence, was captured and installed as integral part of herself...So what difference would it make to her now, whether she is physically involved or renounced later. For her, he has been 'imprinted' on her self, not palm, forever..."

Now recalling their last conversation- she told him two facts;

1)"With you, you are condemning me too to a lifelong loneliness."

2)"I won't be 'alive' with out you."

Point is, he has become so integral to her consciousness, there may not be any separation between rational and emotional minds; emotional- for obvious 'love', and rational- for when a person of such strong convictions/integrity confers his/her devotion/loyalty to a relationship consciously, he/she mayn't be able to retract from it fully even at its collapse- much she may try (unless she finds a worthy allegiance once again, like HDDCS?)...And then her conscience becomes her strongest critique '...She asked him in the end, "Tell me how would I remove your person etched on my 'mind'?" All these, over and above apparent 'finality' in 'dah sanskars' etc.

For all the CB team, I can only thank my stars for choosing to watch this show, and coming across this forum.