Ahem's venting and Gopi's yogyata... - Page 5

Originally posted by: munnihyderabad

thank you kshama...😛

well said at bold...

but by the time she decided to confide in him ...something else went wrong due to the other girl ... kshama...don't worry it will be a learning experience for both of them

and that they both need to ... attend the course of communication 101 in a community college😉

Originally posted by: Dhabu89

First of, I would like to say I am sorry I have not read all the posts and therefore if I happen to copy I promise you it is a sheer coincidence.

Secondly, Munni I loved your post and you have basically spoken what has been on my mind all day. I understand those who say that Gopi has suffered and she needs him to hold her hand and so on...but here is the thing...He is holding her hand and leading her into a relationship in small baby steps and she seems to only dip her toes in the water and wants her security blanket (Kokila). For how long is she going to be running back to Kokila.

There have been posts made where it is said that she is not used to all this and that she has tried to get to know his friends before...like last birthday or when those clients came and she did not speak english and was rewarded by a blasting from Ahem...BTW, I was against Ahem for treating her like that then. But we need to understand that now she sees that there is love for her in his eyes and she sees he is trying to become a better husband and also she sees how happy he is when he is around her and how sad he becomes when she does not go out with him or refuses to do anything with him alone...Ahem has come a long way, how much more can the man do this by himself before we are to blame Gopi 😕...Today she was at fault and there is no two ways about it...That is it...

Ahem complimented her and he showed keen interest in her to take her out. His face lit up when she mentioned she was also going to go to the party. When Anita tried to discourage her and Gopi stood her ground, Ahem had nothing but pride in his eyes for his wife. Ahem was only too happy to let Anita stay behind and they go to the party by themselves. Ahem tried and tried to make her part of his life and he tried to show her his lifestyle...he did not at any time mention her inability to speak to strangers, he would be there for her...he never treated her like an outcast...he wanted to show her off and have everyone in his friends circle be jealous of his beautiful wife...And he wanted to spend alone time with her and all she could do was think about his mom and not worry about his feelings one iota. How can that be forgotten that soon? Ahem was the only one who wanted to have a romantic evening and I have a feeling there could have been a lot more happening later that night if things had gone well...I get that Gopi was worried about her Maji...but seriously, was there no one at home to take care of her...is Gopi the only one who is capable of taking care of Kokila?

That brings me to another point...Does Gopi even trust anyone besides Koki...I seem to think not. She did not want to go with Ahem until Rashi put those thoughts of Anita with Ahem in her mind...She did not want to take this opportunity given to her by her Khanaji to spend time and get to know her husband better. She did not want to know how hurt Ahem would be...to her, her only concern was her Maji's health...and the hell with Ahemji and his party and feelings. Even we women would be pissed if our husbands were thinking of other family members when we were out alone. So why is it hard for us to digest Ahem's anger and understand his feelings. Today is probably the only time (that I can remember) that I can honestly say Ahem was justified in his anger and what he felt was nothing short of jealous of her attention for someone other than himself and also his sadness at the fact that his mom is more important to her than him. Yeah Kokila has always been there for her...no doubt...but she is not a child that she does not understand that there are times when her MIL is not allowed in their time and space...and this party was one of those times...If she is so keen on only looking for her MIL's pally, then why did she allow the SR/SD to happen?

Gopi cried today because she heard half a story that Anita apparently wanted her to hear...She cried because Ahem compared her to Anita and then she saw them together and in her mind she thought she heard Ahem say he regretted his marriage to her...or he married the wrong girl...whatever. And I am upset about it. I don't like to see her in tears, and she has suffered a lot in her life and now it is high time she get only happiness from Ahemji...and that is what she was getting when she just basically threw it back in his face...Does it make it ok for Ahem to have compared her to the skin and bones...NO...nothing of that sort is forgivable. But then again, Ahem is a angry man who runs on emotions and says things out of anger...He did it to get back at her and cause her the similar type of pain she is feeling..how...well she cared more for Maji when they were alone and so he took someone else's name to make her realize what happens when there is a third person in a marriage when only two are required... Ahem is guilty for letting his anger get the best of him...but Gopi is more guilty for creating a situation where Ahem had to use such words and then Anita took advantage of the situation and made it worse. Up until now with all the pre caps and all the promos, I was getting quite upset with Ahem for worrying about Anita...But today I see his care is just care for a sick friend...her care for her Maji is more important to her than her husband or his feelings...

Sorry for the long rant...I could still go on, but I need to get dinner on the table. I would like to say sorry for offending anyone...It was not my intention. What was my intention was to basically put my two cents in and get some attention 😆

Ahem loves Gopi...it has been solidified in the past couple of weeks, but now I do agree with that promo...Gopi needs to prove herself worthy of being a yogya patni...

Again size 7 chappals always welcome...please be gentle 😃

Originally posted by: Aish3003

@Bold... these are the exact things that screwed it up... I was so with Ahem during the rant.. It was perfect... Echoed many of our ffs where we made Ahem say things like "Go, Go take care of your Maaji... why are you worried for me?" this emotion was so clear when he said that "why just Anita, go ask everyone also if they are ok..." Brilliant...

I know many won't believe me when I say this but I was actually cheering for him when he said those things... but like I said... the last two sentences ruined it... i just stopped for a second and was like "Wait what? what did he say" even the second last sentence was fine... but the last one... Big Big Blow.

Only if that Anita wasn't any where in the picture the scene would have been perfect for a new phase in Gohem relation, but her presence has also opened a new phase just the wrong one.

Originally posted by: munnihyderabad

thank you deepu...(hope i got ur name right)...

wow that was a superb reply dear...

yeah ..u r spot on in the first para... very true... if she had been silent and shy ..he wouldn't have minded it ... giving it to her normal behavior ...but her worry and her nag of going home irked him is what i guess

@bold...Ahem's insecurity came to the fore and he is jealous for he is not topping gopi's list😆

yeah i loved it when he said her to go to anita😆

he was more like a kid who is majorly pissed off when his mom is giving attention to other kids😆

Originally posted by: Justlikethat1

Maddy.. Gopi is Ahem's top priority now.. She has been for quite some time.. He does have his mother at the top but he knows when to let go and when not to..

See, I understand where Gopi comes from.. She is not used to parties, she loves Koki, she always worries for others.. Yes.. Understood. I think Ahem understands too.

But she went overboard today..

Remember, Ahem's nature is to become angry first like Gopi's nature is to cry. He shot off the things that came to mind in his frustration. He talks only when he is angry and he becomes shy after that. We have seen it a lot of times. His anger makes him unique, it has its advantages and disadvantages. Today would have been an advantage if Anitha was not there.

For the first time, Ahem made his expectations clear. He wants Gopi to be with him, only him and forget others for that time. Maybe in his anger he stepped out of line but anger is in itself when your emotions are not under control, so accusing him is rather not done. His words may have been wrong but his intention was not. He was trying to convey his needs the only way he knew how..

If Anitha was not there, this would have opened the doors for an open communication. Gopi would have come back and explained while Ahem would have bent backwards to make it up for his anger. But the scene changed due to Anita..

I guess Maddy, in a marriage, you do not solve things by curbing emotions. Sometimes it is an outlet. Like Gopi we can take his outburst as his declaration of doing his duty in the marriage and not being in love. On the other hand, we can also look at it as his declaration and desire to be a typical husband and wanting his mother's DIL to be his wife..

Ahem and Gopi were in character today. He was typical with his anger and Gopi was typical with her worry and lack of confidence.. But that they will now work on their flaws is what is heartening.

Originally posted by: nazliee

i am sorry but i do feel that they are both at fault but cant blame gopi for all the doing and caring on if ahem wants to spend more time with his wife then he needs to make this clear take her out where she feels comfortable like he looked after her when they went shopping. besides if ahem wants gopi as his wife then he should be able to share the bed and stand equal as husband and wife not someone who makes his tea and gets his clothes out.

Originally posted by: Nihira-fan

wonderful post munni!!i don't agree with all your points though...i think both are at fault.the key issue here is lack of communication between them.both of them are too shy to express their feelings.this is such a wonderful track...i'm enjoying it thoroughly!

Originally posted by: dipsy80

for the first time i looking forward to a track where gohem are not happy 😃...

oh n my name is deepa but you can call me deepu...dats wot my friends call me 😊