PaRud SS::Piya Na Rahe Man Basiya(Angst)Part 2 up, Note on PG 10(4/05) - Page 2

Originally posted by: memario

amazing piece of work..u described paro's feelings so well! do continue :)

Originally posted by: NicklausBarbie

Continue soon dear
Nice story

Originally posted by: Suchi.R

Awesome work.. would love to read more..

Originally posted by: T.R.A

Don't stop here please :(
Really enjoyed reading it...you described Paro's pain really well :(
Please continue soon...waiting :)

Originally posted by: bebo2050

u have to continue !!!!!!!!!!!!!

Originally posted by: -Zara-

Hello!

First of all AWWIE! You read my little stories!?!? Thanks so much for enjoying them! Hehehe *blush*

And to your fab story. Paro's feelings are really well displayed and it really does hurt to see Rudra comeing late and even disappearing for a few nights. I'm not going to go straight to the obvio of Laila as it could be Rudra is feeling guilty for accusing Paro as it seems all truth about her innocence is out in the open. Rudra could also be hateful and avoiding of the Thakuraiyn aspect or he's too scared to get any closer to Paro cuz he's already fallen for her. SO LOTS of possibilities here, LOL.

I LOVE ANGST btw. Especially if Rudra's hurting inside as he's done alot of hurting for Paro's little heart on the show so I have had enough. Time for Rudra to feel a little guilty and pain...*sigh*

So that's my rant and intro and compliment and comment done :)

x

Originally posted by: napstermonster

Thank you so very much! I am honored beyond words! You totally made my day, you know!

I loved your story. Loved the build up to the explosion I can imagine in the next part, and it can go in so many different directions-sensual, anger filled, devastating, tragic. It cam even be funny, given Paro's zero knowledge of what seduction and being a proper bride means and rudra years and YEARS of experience with all that! I really like how there is very little in this part to indicate the direction you'll take us in the next one--thats hard to convey, and you've done the whole movement to the final act very nicely!

What I liked the most--because it was so subtle-- is the small sense of worry you've inserted--Paro is thinking---at least Rudra doesn't physically beat me--the image it brings to the reader's mind is immediate--so what does he do to her, that the physical act of torture is missing and she is GRATEFUL for that small mercy? As women, we all know that there are worse things than physical violence, though that is of course heinous. But to psychologically tear down a person give her emotional blows every day, especially to play with her feelings and exploit the honesty and truth of those feeling-s-thats some serious damage there.

You've upped the ante by bringing the action for them tonight, when Rudra gets home right back to the one thing she has not sacrificed to him--her body. And the reason she is now ready to--her mental acceptance of him. And of course, its the one thing he wants, above everything. But he will always hate her if her finally gets--khoobsuraat aurat jo hai! Looking forward to how you continue from here, and where your next few parts take you--please write!

I hope you'll continue, and I hope you'll be someone who we can also get to know very well over the next weeks, as we obsess over the exact same thing! This forum, and the people in it,are particularly nice, much MUCH less crazy//judgmental that the other one I've been on, so this is a good place for you to really explore your writing, and express yourself openly and without any worry. I am really really touched you read my work, (please feel free to comment, now that you have joined!) and even more happy to welcome another writer to the community!

-Navin

Originally posted by: Jaz1990

Do continue plzzz that was great start!

Originally posted by: love14356

That was beautiful

Originally posted by: Suni

That was a lovely beginning!

Originally posted by: XSilentPrayersX

This was Amazing
continue soon

Originally posted by: Malini1

Well written, nice read. Would love to read what Paro is upto.

Originally posted by: sarita_barun

This is fab.
Excited to read more. 😊

Originally posted by: ipkknd-fan

Great piece of work!
Do continue :)

Originally posted by: arshi_r_da_bst.

its a very nice concept and u write very well. go ahead.. 😊

Originally posted by: chotidesi

If you hadn't mentioned it, I would not have guessed that you are a first time writer! I love this- I hope you continue, because I'd like to see Rudra's reaction to a Paro that wants to give herself to him, entirely. I like the way you portrayed her uncertainty, her want to be loved- I think that's very deeply rooted in her character. I'm definitely looking forward to reading more from you- welcome!