REPLIES: YOUR ABBU CAME FOR YOU.... - Page 5

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chicksoup thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#41

Originally posted by: sheilasandhu


I mother is also sacrificing, so could she not have sacrificed just for the sake of a son who has done so much for her... Looks like both Husband and wife are selfish.

Just a question for you, If you were in dilshad's scenario would you be able to accept your husband back ???? An honest from the heart answer please because i know i won't. A woman does not need a man to be complete or happy.

Sheila,

I have been asked this question too...I have seen infidelity at close quarters...a wife's actually..and then there are the usual ones of a man straying away...

I really don't know how to answer it...

But we were in a group discussion when this came up, and two of us said yes...of course that means I said yes...

Only because I cannot imagine my husband doing that to me...so the Q was only hypothetical.

I came home and thought about it...and I saw the man forgiving his wife for the sake of their children...and may be more...


And well...I still think may be...😳 Not because I need to be complete or happy, but because he repents and needs me to be complete and happy...is not that what love is supposed to be?

So, only if he wants me back FOR THE RIGHT REASONS...😳
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Posted: 12 years ago
#42
Very few people have the courage to forgive and choose love over garnering hatred and holding grudges against someone who has wronged you..and even if I disagree with you, I cannot help but admire you for choosing forgiveness and love over hatred and revengefulness.

sheilasandhu thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#43

Originally posted by: chicksoup

Sheila,

I have been asked this question too...I have seen infidelity at close quarters...a wife's actually..and then there are the usual ones of a man straying away...

I really don't know how to answer it...

But we were in a group discussion when this came up, and two of us said yes...of course that means I said yes...

Only because I cannot imagine my husband doing that to me...so the Q was only hypothetical.

I came home and thought about it...and I saw the man forgiving his wife for the sake of their children...and may be more...


And well...I still think may be...😳 Not because I need to be complete or happy, but because he repents and needs me to be complete and happy...is not that what love is supposed to be?

So, only if he wants me back FOR THE RIGHT REASONS...😳


Ok yeah if it is for the kids when the kids are young and need both the parents together i suppose leave alone Love but even i may and i mean may reconcile for the sake of the children.

This is totally a different scene all together her children are grown and the stigma wiped of and thats why i said put yourself in Dilshad's shoes , Go thru that 17years as her . Watch your children suffer and grow. maybe you will understand where i am coming from.

I still remember one statement by Najma. Ammi mujhe abhi bhi yaad hai, jab bhaijaan mujhe kandhe pe betakar school leke jata tha aur Nikhat aur Nuzhat badi badi gadi meh aati thi. That statement for a mother would have killed all my feelings for The so called husband of mine.
🤢🤢😡

antiquegold thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#44

Originally posted by: Nikita_Smith

Very few people have the courage to forgive and choose love over garnering hatred and holding grudges against someone who has wronged you..and even if I disagree with you, I cannot help but admire you for choosing forgiveness and love over hatred and revengefulness.


So true! And at the end of the day, it will set you free.
chicksoup thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#45

Originally posted by: Oldestfan




👏I loved that point U brought about Asad knowing what Dilshad wants..in that case, he thinks his mother is blind to Rashid's faults...when he is the one blind to his repentance...

More than being realistic to what is awaiting her in SM, I think Asad is just being blind...because he perceives Rashid only to be a danger. But what motive would Rashid have to ask for Dilshad back? That is why he comes up with this theory that Rashid has emotionally blackmailed her...took advantage of her feelings...that is why he is trying to reassure her that he will do everything in power to make her life complete..he does NOT REALISE SHE FEELS ADHOORI...he can never get it!

Soup, theres also the pov that... Rashid did not lift a finger to defend dilshad in front of those witches when he was in perfect health. Now, when he is weak, Asad believes even less that he will defend her.mif a woman cannot be defended by the man she loves, whether verbally or physically, how much more incomplete is she going to feel?
In fact, dont know if youve seen it, in the bts of ayaan leaving home, rashid feels some palpitations again! I think its in part 4. But his mission is accomplished because dilshad arrives as ayaan leaves and shireen the human leech stays behind after all!

I think exactly the other way around.. That it need not be heads and tails, but can be a cup of milk with sugar in it... Wont make it spill, just makes it sweeter! 😆

To say to asad and shireen... We are going to meet and visit and spend time, whether you want it or not... Is that too sane for tv? I can visualize so many tragicomic episodes on that track!

Sorry, edited after seeing other posts. Soup, rashid spoke to dilu at the mazaar and said.. We have lived our lives for our children and for others, now it time to live for ourselves. And then he told her that she has the power to make their being together a reality. This was on the phone i think. Thats when she told him to talk to shireen. So rashid really did ask her to choose. To choose him over their children. They were both visualizing asya facing the world together, and drawing strength from that fact in the park by the road. They both chose each other. Asad did not even know! A.Hajnal wrote a post .. Rashid is not asad ahmed khan, and dilu is not zoya. Or similar title. And Asads theory is not a theory.. Its true. If rashid did not use his illness, lets say he was not ill, but he had a eureka moment, i would by the story a lot faster. But talking about his illness and then telling dilshad she has the power, that is i am afraid, emotional blackmail. He is not badi bis son for nothing. 😕

Asad is a close minded man. He is blindly loyal. He does not listen to anybody. With these faults still, he is most attuned to human beings and reality compared to the others at qh,except maybe razia! He misjudged Zoya initially, but saw her true nature much earlier than she saw his. He has been wrong many times. Will he be wrong again? I am betting no!


1. Nothing changes the fact that Asad IS BLIND WHEN IT COMES TO RASHID..he refuses to see WHAT ZOYA HAS ALREADY SEEN...She tries to make him reconcile when he wants to get up ang go at the mentio of Abbu...clearly there..NOTHING WILL CHANGE HIS OPINION OF RASHID.

2. About sitting and talking to Asad N Shireen: Shireen will tak e ablade and Asad will stomp out or rough up Rashid...WE HAVE SEEN THAT HAPPEN OVER and over...😆

3. Emotional blackmailing: For what? A woman who continues to pray for him , pine for him...who SPEAKS OF HIM AS HER CHILDREN'S FATHER... why Najma wentto met him...he wants justice served to her before HE IS GONE...so she can proudly say HER SHAUHAR CAME BACK FOR HER...
sheilasandhu thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#46

Originally posted by: Oldestfan


So true! And at the end of the day, it will set you free.


One can forgive because to forgive is divine but one should never forget cause you would not want to make the same mistake twice.
chicksoup thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#47

Originally posted by: sheilasandhu


Ok yeah if it is for the kids when the kids are young and need both the parents together i suppose leave alone Love but even i may and i mean may reconcile for the sake of the children.

This is totally a different scene all together her children are grown and the stigma wiped of and thats why i said put yourself in Dilshad's shoes , Go thru that 17years as her . Watch your children suffer and grow. maybe you will understand where i am coming from.

I still remember one statement by Najma. Ammi mujhe abhi bhi yaad hai, jab bhaijaan mujhe kandhe pe betakar school leke jata tha aur Nikhat aur Nuzhat badi badi gadi meh aati thi. That statement for a mother would have killed all my feelings for The so called husband of mine.
🤢🤢😡


Sheila,

Situationa are entirely different.

My maid's husband wants to reconcile with her after 10 years after questioning teh paternity of her children..he is old and needs her to look after him.

I will not allow her, nor does she want to go back...even though he has a good salary and she will not have to work as a maid.

A relative separated from her husband thanks to alcohol abuse.he wants to get back...not until he repents...

Here Rashid did many things...some where majboori of a murder he had to hide...of being true at leadst to one woman and her children...but now he has repented...and come back...as teh shauhar Dilshad always knew cared for her...and he did too...all theese years...he has amassed wealth and property in Najma's and Asad's name...was too scared to come near Dilshad or children...the tight leash under which Gazia kept him...pardonable, for me...
sheilasandhu thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#48

Originally posted by: chicksoup


Sheila,

Situationa are entirely different.

My maid's husband wants to reconcile with her after 10 years after questioning teh paternity of her children..he is old and needs her to look after him.

I will not allow her, nor does she want to go back...even though he has a good salary and she will not have to work as a maid.

A relative separated from her husband thanks to alcohol abuse.he wants to get back...not until he repents...

Here Rashid did many things...some where majboori of a murder he had to hide...of being true at leadst to one woman and her children...but now he has repented...and come back...as teh shauhar Dilshad always knew cared for her...and he did too...all theese years...he has amassed wealth and property in Najma's and Asad's name...was too scared to come near Dilshad or children...the tight leash under which Gazia kept him...pardonable, for me...


Oh well difference of opinion than cause for me i would have measured is pardon against the suffering of my children and he would not measure up against that suffering. Property and money cannot replace the bitter childhood ever.

Anyway it's difference of POV .

P.s ANYWAYS why was there a 2nd woman and that too before the murder. The murder came about later??????????
Edited by sheilasandhu - 12 years ago
chicksoup thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#50

Originally posted by: Oldestfan


So true! And at the end of the day, it will set you free.


It will set you free for sure...and you don't have to accept the other person back to feel that...just forgive for your sake- what Dilshad did first...

Accepting back is a big step...only true love can help you do that...and if that person is worth loving...despite his faults...

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