Mr. Khan, Your Abbu CAME FOR YOU......

My dear Mr. Khan,

It kills me to see you like this. Yet I can only sympathise with Phoophi. No woman should be asked to choose between her husband and son- she was. And I know very well how difficult it was for her to choose.

I can see you are bitter about this...you feel betrayed. You feel like your Abbu will devastate your mother again... But can you just give him one more chance, WITHOUT JUDGING HIM?

I agree he has done pretty unforgivable things in the past...but I know he has been long suffering for it. In fact, my first interaction with him was just that...the guilt of a man who had wronged his loved one- a man whose punishment had been separation for a huge part of his life. And he had born that punishment without a grumble...sticking to his responsibilities...trying not to repeat that mistake with another woman. But he was a man already dead long back...I could read it in the eyes that tried to comfort me in spite of his own tragedy, brought on by his own actions.

Who deserves forgiveness, Mr. Khan? Only people who have committed a mistake in innocence? What about the people who go about making mistakes, knowing it would hurt someone else..and later on repent when they see how one mistake led to many mistakes...until they became irredeemable.

I understand your pain...your Abbu left you and your Ammi helpless. My Abbu did that to me too...he left me an orphan, and he probably does not even know I exist or that my mother is no more. Yet I am here- searching for him. You yourself call me foolish loking for a man who never botherd to look back- but I have known it in my heart that there is a father waiting for me somewhere...I know it is only a feeling...and it is stupid to go by just a feeling. But that is what I have believed in always...and when I meet my Abbu, I am not going to judge him for his past mistakes, or expect anything from him...I just want to see the man who brought me into this world...see if he has any place in his life for me. If he doesn't, I would gladly leave...with the hurt that I was always an unwanted child. But at least, I would know. That is why I am here on what appears to be a pointless mission to everyone who loves me- You,Aaapi, Jeeju...

When I look at us, we are both so similar...we have both been betrayed by our fathers...the difference is, yours came back for you. He accepted his mistake, and begged for forgiveness...from the woman and the child he had abandoned...one forgave, the other did not. And I can see that you will continue to burn in this fire of hatred until you learn to forgive...

What is it that you expect from your Abbu...He could buy you a thousand toys for the years he spent away from you...spend a hundred hours begging you...is any of that going to make any difference? WHAT CAN HE DO TO MAKE YOUR HURT GO AWAY...the answer is nothing. There is absolutely nothing he can do to make things right...phoophi knows that. She knows the POWER OF SELF HEALING lies within herself. I wish you'd realisethat too. You are gaining nothing by letting the ugly hatred eat you away. And you are only make things umpteen times more difficult for dear phoophi. You, of all the people should be her silent support in this journey to her past...this trail of thorns that lead to her salvation...but you are making it harder.

I wish you'd learn the gift of forgiveness, at least for the sake of the woman who has already suffered a lot.

And anyway, who are we to judge and decree? Shall we leave that to the Lord Almighty?

"The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong."
Mahatma Gandhi, All Men are Brothers: Autobiographical Reflections

"Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it."
Mark Twain

I am willing to forgive, you are not.

Your Abbu came back for you...Will mine ever come for me???

PS:

I might miss Monday and Tuesday discussions and I wanted to put across Zoya's POV here. Those with a forgiving heart will understand her, others will bash her..that much is understood.😆

I know there will be many Qs on the practicality of forgiveness...hope this helps:

"Forgiveness is not about forgetting. It is about letting go of another person's throat...Forgiveness does not create a relationship. Unless people speak the truth about what they have done and change their mind and behavior, a relationship of trust is not possible. When you forgive someone you certainly release them from judgment, but without true change, no real relationship can be established...Forgiveness in no way requires that you trust the one you forgive. But should they finally confess and repent, you will discover a miracle in your own heart that allows you to reach out and begin to build between you a bridge of reconciliation...Forgiveness does not excuse anything...You may have to declare your forgiveness a hundred times the first day and the second day, but the third day will be less and each day after, until one day you will realize that you have forgiven completely. And then one day you will pray for his wholeness..."
Wm. Paul Young, The Shack: Where Tragedy Confronts Eternity

Rashid has clearly repented...so many times he has tried to beg for forgiveness...and Dilshad has granted him just that. And now Rashid wants to give her the respect that is due a FIRST WIFE...so her children will not be called a chhodi huyi aurat's children...an act of penance Asad declines in his pride. He does not need Rashid Ahmed Khan...sadly, Dilshad still needs him, as much as Rashid needs her...not for the title or honour...just for the only man she ever loved.

And now, life has thrown another difficult situation in her face, where she has to choose between a repentant man and an unfoprgiving son..and she chooses...she can never win any way...she has always only lost in life.

She could win...if Asad learned to forgive too...things would be perfect for Dilshad for once, if that were to happen.

AND THE BIGGEST POINT HERE IS THAT THERE IS NOTHING RASHID CAN DO TO DESERVE FORGIVENESS...

Forgiveness is not deserved...it is just GIVEN.

I will be out today...hopefully will be able to reply to comments tomorrow...

I WILL COMMENT LATER.

sorry to say but i does not agree even a bit .
he is doing the same with shirin what he had done with dilshad 17 years ago .
and just tell me one thing how will everything be alright by taking dilshad your ex wife in sm .
this is such a disgusting selfish and cheap thing to do .
talking about dilshad ,rashid was not leaving asad ,he was leaving dilshad but asad left all comforts and happiness for just being with his mother and curing her grief .and now the same mother is leaving that son for the same man and that too without informing him .
and lastly talking about zoya ,
she does not even remember her abbu betrayal and anything else about her childhood and asad has witnessed each and everything with his own naked eyes .
then on what basis she is preaching this to asad .
left alone love ,if she has even a little amount f respect of asad then she will never preach something like this .
no offence with anyone .just my pov .

bt yeah still rashid z not doing rite thng..

Suman, kaash aap QH ke script writer hote!!

beautifully written!👏👏👏


but if Rashid really wants to correct his mistakes and redeem himself, he should first go and accept to the whole world that 17 years back an innocent lady, a mother of a small innocent baby died at his hands!

That is what he can do to get Asad's respect back, and then we might consider him worthy of being forgiven!

But of course he won't do that, because he is COWARD and SELFISH!

what a great thought .
but zoya is not asad .zoya condition is different n asad condition is different.
zoya doesnt know what happen btwn her parents she can forgive easily but asad know he know that rashid betray his mother infront of him rashid left dilshad .
this is very difficult for anybody to forgive .
dont want to talk about rashid he is criminal like gaziya n trio must be punished for there deed.
jo insaan kisi insaan ko kabra tak nasseb nahi hone deta .even god never forgive them