In Defense Of Zoya - Page 8

Agree.

Originally posted by: notagain

How does Zoe assume the otherwise for Najma, the part where Najran(now we have a pair name already? ) stay on their own, she definitely realizes the difference between Dilshaad and Haseena.

I agree in reality folks overlook and adjust in all families, love or arranged marriage does not matter, but then it is within limits. I understand Haseena is an extreme character, and that skews this whole track a lot. It's easier to rationalize fiction, I would never wish a Haseena on anybody in reality, even for an enemy.

Originally posted by: rivya

<font color="#cc0099">Yes..we all worry about their impression, but again, do we really take them into consideration when choosing our partner (I am talking love marriages) or wishing to marry them. Most likely we live in our own households and have to deal with the ILs occasionally (once a week or so on). Most families in US or outside of India do not have a "Debra" having to deal with a "Marie" walking in anytime of the day or God forbid living with them.</font>

<font color="#cc0099">In India, due to the culture of joint families, even in love marriages the situation with ILs is weighed. Personal experience, my cousin married her BF despite stong protests from her FIL (in India) who finally agreed. Five years into the marriage, the situation is such that they are working out a amicable solution where her husband can move out of their home and family business so that they can setup their own household. The entire family is going through a very rough time since the FIL is extrmely verbally abusive to both his son and my cousin. Had they been in USA, it would mostly not be such a dire situation since they would be in their own respective homes to begin with.</font>

<font color="#cc0099">SO I guess what I am saying is that though the worry of ILs might be universal, they are much more real in India. And since Zoya has not had to worry about her ILs or witnessed joint family situations,she is oblivious to the situation. Which is fine by me.</font>

Can I just say that even in India the concept of nuclear families is very popular.

Have to admit i haven't lived all my life in India - but personally I wouldn't ask or need anybody's approval or permission to be married. At the end of the day it is we who have to live with the choice of partner so it should be our decision. So, I do understand Zoe's lack of interest in Haseena. However, t was the wrong time to have that conversation

Originally posted by: delena90

Can I just say that even in India the concept of nuclear families is very popular.

Have to admit i haven't lived all my life in India - but personally I wouldn't ask or need anybody's approval or permission to be married. At the end of the day it is we who have to live with the choice of partner so it should be our decision. So, I do understand Zoe's lack of interest in Haseena. However, t was the wrong time to have that conversation

Originally posted by: delena90

The people who think zoya is not good enough for asad i guess are letting their bias against zoya color their view - however my opinion asad himself is not a catch...AT ALL. In the real world asad would be behind bars for being an abusive idiot. However, they are all characters and they are flawed. Asad has always irritated me and continues to do so, zoyas interfering behavior irritates me too and Ayaan and shireen need to boil in a cauldron of hot water.

Beautifully expressed with max clarity 😆. I had to applaud your post though I don't usually post on QH (as I don't watch it) - I just stalk the forums when I work late hours. I agree that Asad is not a catch and neither is Zoya. In real life people would dislike Asad as being too opinionated and an MCP (though a very successful and financially sound one) and of course Zoya would be a charmer but also very nosy / irritating company.

Originally posted by: rivya

<font color="#cc0099">Yes they are...but only in metros...You go to smaller towns and cities (and not the villages), THey still have joint families.</font>

<font color="#cc0099">I grew up in a nuclear family and have never lived with my ILs except for when we are visiting each other...so yeah..</font>

I grew up in a nuclear family too so like you I completely understand the viewpoint of not caring about the ILs.

Originally posted by: delena90

The people who think zoya is not good enough for asad i guess are letting their bias against zoya color their view - however my opinion asad himself is not a catch...AT ALL. In the real world asad would be behind bars for being an abusive idiot. However, they are all characters and they are flawed. Asad has always irritated me and continues to do so, zoyas interfering behavior irritates me too and Ayaan and shireen need to boil in a cauldron of hot water.

This is exactly why they are just characters in a show, and maybe some of it is borrowed from reality.

It does give us an opportunity to discuss real issues in an alternate universe of IF. 😆

Originally posted by: bheegi

How can Zoya say that what Haseena bi did was not important? SHE will be Najma's mother in law and it was clear how she treated Nikhat! So can she expect much better for Najma? She can't talk about colour, but she can find something else to taunt her with! Zoya is being very narrow minded! I expected her to think from more angles!

that's the difference between someone from the US and India. Kids who grow up outside India , don't give two hoots about in laws...they care about their partners only. My kids would never care about their in laws as long as they love their partners

Definitely Zoya does not deserve to be bashed, like everyone else she has her own opinion and her own beliefs, and no one should claim she is not fit for Mr Khan and family for that. She might not be entirely right in the bigger POV but from her own characters POV she is justified. BUT I feel like she needs to realize that she is part of a family now, and their ties with others matter to her as well, if her family has just had to face humiliation due to a misunderstanding and has strained relations with closed ones (read:Ayan) and come back hurt and shaken then it is not the right situation to push Najma's wedding right away, she could have thoughtfully given this scenario some time and I am glad that Asad stopped her rant, it was much needed. Nikhat is not related to her, and her first priority is Najma considering that Imran loves Najma too, but even if we justify that she cannot think about Nikhat here, she should think about her own family. Their relations with the children of the other house have been strong, and none of them would want to cause them any pain for their own needs. As such this situation needed some maturity from her side BUT she is human and a pretty impulsive one at that, she needs some growth which shall come with time, but none of this deserves any harsh bashing as such..

Bheegi ...I was wondering where is your post...must have missed it yesterday... 😒
Even I was quite surprised with the amount of Zoya bashing...
Zoya ...is and was always implusive and will do anything for people she considers her own...and right now she is thinking of only Najma...
Infact when Najma was upset for the last few days, neither her mom nor bro noticed it...it was Zoya who picked on it...it was to Zoya that Najma confided in first...so Zoya is standing up for her...
Let Zoe come to know the true colours of Hasseena and Immi...she will go for their necks