||Asya FF|| Bring me back to life - pt 23 -pg151!! - Page 67

I just gave him the permission to read my diary, what's wrong with me? I can't even take back my words. I set in the balcony gazing at the moon. Suddenly, I felt a tap at my shoulder, what's if it's him? No way, he isn't that fast, is he? I turned back and saw his mom staring at me with that heart-whelming smile which a mother would give her daughter. I shift sideways giving her some space to sit. She set beside me quietly not saying anything. "I'm...sorry." She stared at me confusingly as if I'm speaking some alien language. "About earlier" I quickly added making it easier for her to comprehend.

"Ah... That, it's perfectly fine." She forgave me? Well, that was easy. Maybe it's just easy talking to her because she reminds me of my mother. How good would it be, only if mom was alive? She would pamper me, comfort me and do everything a mother does. "I'm also like your mother, so don't be afraid of me." She whispers calmly as if she read my mind. Maybe I can envision her as my mother for a short time, what harm would it bring? I want to be selfish for a while and keep her for myself, can I do that? I placed my head on her thighs and lay down on the bench. I miss those days when my mother would run her hand through my hair.

"I miss my ammi." It was a whisper which I doubt she would have heard but she ran her hand though my hair and hums a tone which was very soothing. Not very long, I started to feel sleepy.

~~~~~~~~~

I could hear ammi humming the tone, the tone which I'm too familiar with. She used to do that to me when I couldn't sleep. I glimpse Zoya sleeping peacefully; she looks like a fallen angel. "Carry her to her room, she's asleep." My mother murmured not wanting to wake her up. I nod and carried her slowly heading to her room. I lay her on her bad and covered her with the blanket. I set the diary on the nearby cabinet being content that I receive the permission to read her diary. I know it's difficult to let someone in but she is giving me chance to step into her past, I feel as if important. I sat on the bad staring at her. Staring is bad but I'm doing it anyways.

The moonlight filtered through the window pane showing her perfect features, her faultless glossy lips and long eyelashes resting on her smooth skin. A weird yet wonderful feeling stir inside me which I couldn't comprehend but it makes my heart race. Perhaps I got to know that Zoya is my crush so the feeling is leisurely stirring up. The feeling is much stronger but I couldn't care at the moment, I just want to watch her wordlessly. I sense the need to protect her; this mysterious girl I glimpse at the bench is now my responsibility.

I was about to leave when I remembered something which my mother forgot to do. She would always kiss me on my forehead after humming the tone. I caress her cheek and lean in little by little, fighting myself whether or not to do it. Firstly, she is sleeping so she wouldn't know. Secondly, if she asks about it, I would say she was dreaming. I pressed my lips on her forehead and moved back hastily. It was just 3 seconds but it felt like a lifetime. Those were the most precious 3 seconds of my life. I tugged her properly and left with her diary in my hands.

Here I am sitting on my bed, analysis her diary. Uncovering yet another secret of hers, or perhaps attempting to comprehend her feelings.

Dear diary,

School is motivating; I look forward to learning every day. Mr. Odds is certainly odd, he is like out of the ordinary that's why he is odd. I don't know what am I blabbering but there is this new science teacher whose name is Mr.odds. Now what's odd about him? His name, the way he walks and talks and everything is odd and the way he is nice to me is undoubtedly unusual, maybe that's why I get to understand him properly and we are getting along. He makes science much easier and interesting to learn and I'm starting to understand science, now isn't it strange? He is the nicest teacher I've came across so far and I actually enjoy attending his lessons. Besides Mr.odds, nothing fascinating happened today. I'm glad things are working out reasonably well for me since my father comes home late when I'm asleep. I don't have to suffer his beatings for some days which mean I don't get new bruise and I don't need to cover up. I'm not all the time blessed like these few days so I should treasure them. Anyways, I got to go now. Bye.

Mr.odds, science teacher? That's funny. My science teacher was a monster who I wouldn't want to face any time in my lifetime, he was like a dinosaurs. Way to go to the next page.

Dear diary,

You must be wondering where did I wander off the past two days, well the thing is something very bad happened to me but promise me you won't tell anyone. The night before, my dad brought an unknown man home and they were bargaining about a sum of money, of course I wondered why but I thought he must need it for gambling so I let the matter off. Unfortunately, that was definitely not the case. The man appeared at my doorstep so I told him that my father is not at home but he said he needed me. I couldn't understand what was going on, everything was unclear and the next thing I know, he was forcing himself on me. He nibbled my neck and touching me places where he shouldn't but I felt so weak and helpless. I felt disgust but I couldn't do anything. I grab the nearest object which appeared to be the lamp and hit him on his head. Blood was streaming out of his skull which made me numb. I thought I killed a person, I was a murderer. I left him there running as fast as I could and went to the safest place, the theme park. When I returned at night, no one was there, not my father, not that unknown man, no one. I felt relieved that at least I wasn't a murderer.

I set on the bed lost in thoughts, staring the diary. Thinking of the truly terrible things she had to go through, it made me sick to my stomach. Being born in a family which obviously didn't want you, molested by an unknown man at your own house and being physically abused by your own father, she certainly had the worst of it. The thing I'm sure of is, she had an immensely big heart to survive all this. But not anymore, I will protect her from now on; I will set her free from the hell.

~~~~~~~~

P.S. read the note below :)

Farah<3

NOTE:

so the thing is im going to camp tomorrow, its 3 days and 2 nights so i just wanted to inform you guys in advance that i wont be able to give an update coming week. im sorry :(