Yet another great update from you, dear Meena, and this time it is the indomitable SP. You have managed to bring out the nuances of his character very nicely. I like that you brought in the morning walk cronies in your analysis. You are also right on about his intolerance of the happiness of his own children and grand-children, manifesting as a form of sadism. Very well done and concisely and beautifully stated. Here are some thoughts that occurred while reading your post.
SP belongs to the patriarchal breed of the self-made man. The self-made man, you know, is the one who does not credit anyone else with the achievements and progress that he has made in his life. He is the type who will say that he studied under a street-light, and had to forgo all kinds of comforts in order to rise ahead in life and to make a name for himself.
Realistically speaking, there is no such thing as a self-made man. Somebody took care of this person as a child and provided for them, albeit imperfectly. Even if the person studied under the streetlight, at least, it was there for them to study under. When we look deeply into anyone's situation, there are so many sources of help from all quarters that help one to survive, to rise, etc. To not acknowledge these sources of overt or covert help is dangerous, and can lead to severe control issues as you point out. In other words, the self-made man plays God. He thinks that he can control his own life, and the destinies of everyone connected to him. His MO is to capitalize on the weaknesses of the people he strives to control, while forgetting the glaring weakness that is his own --the pathalogical need for societal approval.
The self-made man keeps harping to his family of all the sacrifices and hard work that he did, and everything he had to forgo so that they all could enjoy and bask in the comfort of his toil. In fact, as you put it so well, even his wife and children are not regarded as people, but as "achievements." In this objectification, there is no place for others' feelings in their own right. This is why Yash's inordinate period of grief went unchecked. As long as Yash's grief was not rocking the Scindia empire or the Scindia raft made of flimsy planks of social applause, nothing was done by the family to intervene in this grief for a long period of time. Even when he took measures to interrupt this grief, it was to make a point of "uplifting the life of a hapless widow," rather than to help his son.
The story of the self-made man is a sad caricature of one who has deep issues with trust. When such issues are not addressed early on, they get turned inside-out, and the psyche starts to think that it can only rely on itself for everything, gradually leading to being a control king, spurred by the false belief that nothing and no one is responsible for the person's well-being and achievements. It is a sad and a lonely place to be, because the person's psyche has cut itself off from all sources of joy and help in the mistaken notion that seeking help is weakness. Further, the person becomes intolerant, resenting the happiness of his own children, as you have so aptly pointed out in your analysis.
I do not know what it will take for SP to come out of this --probably the loss of the trust and love of his sons, and by default, his wife also. When people stop subscribing into the myth of the self-made-man, and do not put the same premium on his achievements, and prioritize love and togetherness over monetary security and material comforts, perhaps it can be a wake-up call.
Meena, this turned out to be much longer than I planned. In the future, if you do not want me to spin off on your posts, just let me know. Om shantih
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