Aarti's Diary Entries - Updated pg 7 - Page 5

kudos !! awesome entry !! 👏

Aarti's sorrowful musings:

Dear Diary

I finally realize that my inner voice was true. It had warned me way back at the time of my first few dates with P – that I had gotten too easily in a relationship with him and that it would be too difficult nay impossible to escape.

P was enigmatic, charismatic and handsome. I was needy, yearning for love – for years I remember asking God for just one person whom I could love. I never understood why God took my parents away and left me alone. For years I was so afraid without any feeling of security and stability. As I grew up I shaped and molded myself to make others happy – and so at college I was the girl all turned to for help whether it is class notes or cajoling their parents to extend the curfew hour. I had several close friends but yet lonely, while all my friends had loving families – I lacked someone to love. So when P started 'chasing' me around college I was flattered.

The aura of romance swept me off my feet. My naivet and gullibility only made it too easy for him to make me feel desired and loved. In short he had me right where he wanted me and the relationship was proceeding at breakneck speed. Once I saw him in a compromising pose with a freshman and my inner voice rebelled and warned me. I took off and went to Pir Baba's dargah - there too I got the feeling that P was not right for me. I withdrew and started rebuffing him but my friends - Suniti in particular laughed at my fears. They conveyed my inhibitions to P. He decided to take things further and took me over to meet his parents. Shobha Ma and Dupeyji welcomed me as a daughter and made me feel like their own. They took me under their wing and for the first time in my life I felt like I had a home and loving parents - while P lavished unwavering attention on me. I had never felt so loved, so beautiful, so desired. And soon within a 3 month period we were married.

Soon after our honeymoon period I realized that our loving relationship was one sided. I loved – P dominated. I gave in – he controlled. I became subservient – he became abusive. I poured out my trust, generosity and compassion on him – he grabbed it, demanded more and trampled on me. As yet I loved him – for had I not promised to love him for life when I married him? I clung on to the courting days – to the P who loved me and swept me off my feet and more importantly I clung to Shobha Ma and Bauji. I started helping Bauji in his business to keep my mind occupied and soon enough I assumed P's workload while he claimed the money. I felt abused, neglected, ignored and unwanted by him.

He professed to love me and his parents, but treated us with indifference and contempt, complaining that we interfered in his affairs. He was selfish – interested only in what we could give him. What so ever he hinted as need – had to be provided for by me, particularly money. He expected me to help Shobha Ma and take care of all of the household details such as cleaning and cooking and at the same time to take care of the business with Bauji while he enjoyed nothing but leisure time. By the time I realized he never cared about me and was cheating on me – I was pregnant with Ansh and felt trapped. Trapped with my own need and longing for love, trapped in my love for him, his parents and my niche in their life, and now for the home that my unborn baby desperately needed.

P walked away from me and from my womb-baby Ansh with no regrets. He had taken money from Bauji and started a new business with Nida his girlfriend. The warning signs were there early on, but I was too enamored with my need for love and to be loved. If it were not for Ansh, Ma and Bauji – I would never have considered a re-marriage. Yashji liberated me from P – but P has shackled himself to me. His never ending greed for money – has now turned into never ending domination and humiliation of me, Ansh and Yashji. Now that I am married to Yashji and Yashji won the custody battle both Ansh and I are distanced from him. So P is now trying to conquer us again – this time with force not love. He has kidnapped Ansh and threatens to kill him if I do not surrender myself to him. All very exciting to him, while draining and frightening to Ansh, Yashji and me………………………..

Anonee thats a superb diary writing on Aarti's realisation regarding fallingi n love with Prashant too soon ... fabulous 👏👏👏... Yesterday Me and Samana were discussing the same .. Aarti easily got fascinated towards this dabang dominating style of Prashant and thought he is going to b my knight in shining armour ... but like u said post honeymoon , she realised that her love was just one sided while he just controlled like a typical male chauvinist who believe women r born to serve men 🤢🤢...

Great imagination Anonee and superb diary entries of Aarti you have pictured her realisation towards Prasanth which I sincerely hope Mittals will show in the forthcoming episodes or just she will mention this to Yash what was Prasanth or tell in the court in case Yash is arrested for his murder. Love your write up...