Episode Discussion Thread- PV...EK Nayee Umeed

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Angie

@Angie12

Rocker

+ 2

Posted: 12 years ago

#81

One more thing I forgot to add about the previous episode. Some are questioning as to why Divya ignored Kamla's bad behavior and only talked about Sarita's rudeness. Well, as Divya admitted that Raj marrying someone else was the root cause of her anger. Also, Sarita behaved rudely with her and Kamla was showering praises on her. So as she knows nothing about this family and based on outer appearances, Divya judged Sarita too harshly. I had written all this in my previous comments.

But there was another detail shown in the very first episode after the leap. There was an older woman who had brought ladoos for Divya and she told Divya that her daughter-in-law emulates her and has changed herself watching Choti bahu on TV. So Divya is used to hearing this and knows that she is a role model as a serial bahu for many mother-in-laws. So she wouldn't find it strange for Kamla to tell Sarita to be more like her. It may be said that Divya is living in a bubble, but that again makes her very human. What I liked about that scene was how they had a detail shown in the first episode that partially explains Divya's different reaction to Kamla and Sarita's rudeness.

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Angie

@Angie12

Rocker

+ 2

Posted: 12 years ago

#82

Originally posted by: Myra.nelly
These three characters Divya, Raj, Sarita...are suffering from their own mistakes..yeah its true they have flaws and thats what makes the show dinamic, if any were perfect people it would have been dull...there is smth good in them and thats love, each love someone but made wrong decisions...and still living in their own hell...

Myra, I would not even call it making wrong decision. It was making their choices at that time and living with the consequences of those choices. Divya chose to follow her career to fulfill her responsibilities. That was not a wrong choice if she had no alternative. Was Raj willing or even in a position to help her with these responsibilities.

Same with Sarita. She made a choice to marry Raj despite knowing fully well that he was in love with somebody else and was not willingly marrying her. Did she make a wrong choice? Well, it depends. If she had a supportive family who was willing to stand with her even if she decided to back out, then probably she made a wrong choice. If she was forced into this marriage for some reason, then she had no choice. Or if she hoped to change Raj after marriage, then it was her gamble and she is paying for taking that risk. She could have walked out of this marriage in last 10 years. She is probably not doing so because she seems to be in love with Raj based on how she was shown running when she heard a motorcycle or the way she is different with Raj compared to his family. So not walking out of this marriage is her choice and she is paying for the consequences.

Raj is different here. They have not shown why he married Sarita despite not showing up almost until the end. He did not wait for Divya even for few months. Did Divya explained to him her responsibilities and told him to wait for her? So more than Divya and Sarita, he probably made a wrong decision where three people are unhappy. But again did he have a choice or did his father force him into it (either using emotional blackmail or using some other means). But if Divya could support her family at that age, so he could too. So he more than likely made a wrong decision either due to bruised ego or because he was badly hurt.

But you are right that these flaws in all three characters make them interesting rather than one-dimensional.

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misti73

@misti73

Sparkler

+ 4

Posted: 12 years ago

#83

Originally posted by: Neerjaa

I have answer of your underlined question from my personal experience . in this kind of set up guys are just business deal thats why his father did not ask him . I didn't say that the character was not realistic but these were my questions regarding Raj. I know that parents like Raj's parents do exist in real life and there are also people who like Raj do succumb to family pressure. But I have also known people who unlike Raj have stood upto family pressure and chosen their own path. I have also known people who succumbed to family pressure but have let their past go. They decided to accept their present and also to respect it. That is why I want to hear Raj's POV. . Raj he may not be financially independent , then how he could have supported Divya and her responsibilities . Even if he was , his father would not have let him marry Divya . If her parents died he must be knowing that it will be divya,s responsibility being the eldest one ..I am not talking of him marrying Divya and taking care of her responsibilities but just supporting himself and waiting for her. As for Sarita , how much money background you have , people specially from this community think , you have to stay in your in laws house . And in small town people still think that guy will forget his love Not only in small towns but big towns and cities too. Again I am not saying that the characters are not real. My questions were for the makers to throw light on the characters choices in life.
All this situations and characters reminds me so many people , who suffered for many years then became rebellious
..Here i do not find anyone negative just the victims of circumstances .I also do not find anyone negative and find them very human.

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misti73

@misti73

Sparkler

+ 4

Posted: 12 years ago

#84

Originally posted by: chalhov
Running away from home with 3 sisters is just escapism and from responsibilities, in an Indian home marriage is not a one day affair there are so many ceremonies so running away the last day is no solution even if reluctant to marry. But Raj even after 10 years is also being an escapist. If running away from a marriage and home with three sisters is escapism then isn't it also escapism to run away from ones duty towards ones wife? In these ten years has he even tried to look for solutions and to resolve this issue? How responsible or mature is he as a person if the only solution for him is to live in his own world and not even think about the emotional needs of his wife? so will have to W & W what happened the story is yet to unfold till now we know the current circumstances and feelings of the characters as of today and that Divya left and Raj was heartbroken and searching for her in the station she hiding and that they both loved each other. Sarita ill treated but she is not meek and answers back but does the major household work and ignored by her husband who does not give her any rights as a wife but little bit caring for her comfort which is shown in his switching off the fan when she was shivering. Yes we do have to wait for the story to unfold to us because till now there are many aspects of the three main characters that are still not clear to us.

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Mirela

@Myra.nelly

Rocker

Posted: 12 years ago

#85

Angie,lets call it unfortunate choices...they werent good chosers and that made their life miserable...i dont find any villans in this story but their own flaws and consequences of their bad choice is playing that part very well.. and i wouldnt put the blame more on Raj..he may have not waited but divya didnt look for him either , or in marriage both him and sarita are equal, both didnt had the guts to confront the familly for their own decision abt marriage but went with flow knowing there is high risk for her to not make him fall for her and raj to forget his love and live a happy life..

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misti73

@misti73

Sparkler

+ 4

Posted: 12 years ago

#86

@ Angie yes to everything that you have written about Divya's scene and how the makers are projecting Divya-Raj to the audience. Another thing that caught my attention in that scene was Divya's acceptance that she is by nature very impulsive person. She said that 10 years back she also used to do the same...impulsively run away with the scootie and Raj will be running after her. Maybe it was this impulsiveness that made her go to Mumbai without telling Raj and just like Raj always used to wait for her she thought that he will do the same. Since she did not know about his family situation, his family and his interactions with his family did not come into her mind. But she is mature enough to accept her mistake when her mistake is pointed out to her. She dd apologise to her siblings for rushing off in the middle of the night in rain just because she was emotionally disturbed and did not think about the consequences. She is also mature and open minded enough to accept the fact that her younger siblings and their spouses can reprimand her for her mistakes. I mean that she does not take it personally and does not get affronted that people younger than her are pointing to her mistakes.

I am also interested in the fourth character. He does look more grounded than Divya. You picked out a good point that although Raj was with Divya throughout the majority of her journey to the hospital, but he was not there right at the end. There was another parallel too...he gave the responsibility of Divya to the unknown man saying that he has to finish an errand. Wonder will that play out as something that happened in past too...he wanted to wait but he had to take care of some responsibility or is it meant also for the future...

There was another scene that I was interested in and that was the scene between Sarita and dadi. Sarita is not much different from Divya regarding facts of life. Divya deep in her heart knew that Raj might have got married. In the same way Sarita deep in her heart knows that she is fighting a loosing battle regarding gaining the affections of her emotionally absent husband. She clearly told her grandmother in law that hitting ones head against a stone will only injure her head and what is the use for waiting something which has not happened in such a long time...when the GMIL was talking about rains and how rain removes all the harshness and suffering and gives birth to new life. Divya thought that Raj will wait for her because he loves her and Sarita has/is been taught to believe or hope that Raj will come back to her just because she is married to him. Her GMIL also teaching her to not pay attention to what the MIL and the SILs are saying. To her all this is pretty normal because she also faced all this from her MIL.The only difference being that most probably her husband was interested in her but her grandson is not interested in his wife. But being a traditionalist the GMIL believes that marriage takes care of everything. The other point of similarity is that when Divya came to know the truth the first person she blamed for Raj's condition was Sarita and not Raj himself (I am not talking about her reasons or the fact that she accepted her mistake, I am only talking about her reaction). In the same way Sarita is holding or has been taught to hold Raj's lover responsible for his reactions towards her and not Raj himself.

This lady (grandmother in law) caught my attention in the beginning of the show...as you have said before she has no issues regarding forcing her grandson into marrying someone against his choice. They showed her praying that Raj returns to the wedding. Then there was this scene where Raj's mother was lamenting to Arti's MIL regarding Raj being the only son and Arti's mother having four sons. When Arti's MIL said that it does not matter whether one has son or daughter and one should go with the changing times, Raj's grandmother apologised to Arti's MIL that Kamla is from Haryana and thus she is talking like this. At that time I was wondering that whether she is reprimanding her DIL for being so open to admit that they are only interested in sons to outsiders or whether she was indirectly telling Arti's MIL that unlike Kamla, she is more polished to openly accept that she too is also only interested in sons. Then on one side she knows the difference between illusions and reality (she does make fun of one of her granddaughter when this girl says that how can she eat when CB has ended and again pointed out today that chotibahu belongs to TV and not to real world) but has no issues regarding maintaining this illusion to Sarita that her husband will come back to her. For some it might be her giving hope to Sarita to continue fighting and not give up, but doesn't making someone believe in something that has no basis in reality equal to making them live in an illusion. Wonder what will happen to Sarita if the thread finally snaps?

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Mirela

@Myra.nelly

Rocker

Posted: 12 years ago

#87

Misti, Angie..i am also intrigued by this new guy i gotta feeling that this love triangle is abt to turn into a square !

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Putija

@PutijaChalhov

Stunner

+ 9

Posted: 12 years ago

#88

Originally posted by: misti73

Edited by chalhov - 12 years ago

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neerjashingla

@Neerjaa

Sparkler

Posted: 12 years ago

#89

As for about the fourth wheel , i had this notion from the time that guy met her at the station and Raj is steal lost in his love for Divya ..Can it go Movie Silsila way ..There none was negative again were victims of circumstances ..Misti ,i will really give you credit ,how well you go in to the psyche of characters . As for Divya , saying in the past were just her possessiveness about Raj . Just the past will throw light

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Angie

@Angie12

Rocker

+ 2

Posted: 12 years ago

#90

@Misti,

Really good points about Divya's nature and Dadi influencing Sarita's behavior. They are showing two different type of families and that probably will explain how Divya and Raj will behave or behaved to different circumstances in the future and in the past.

Divya's family is very realistic and even though they support Divya, they also make her aware of the reality. There is no difference in SIL or sister or brother pointing out faults in Divya's logic or her actions. Even when she brought up Raj, SIL cautioned about somebody not waiting for 10 years no matter how great the love was. There is equality for everyone - young, old, girl, boy, in law or blood relation. So Divya does get her heart broken and has probably high-standard dreams (not unrealistic at all), but does accept the reality better and try her best to move on. She did all these 10 years where she couldn't be with Raj but was able to enjoy or live her life too.

Raj's family on the other hand prefers to live in a delusional world whether it is Dadi, Kamla or her daughters or even his father (based briefly on what was shown). So they blame anybody but themselves. Kamla and her daughters blame Sarita and make her feel inadequate that she is somehow not good enough to win Raj. Dadi on the other hand blames Divya and gives false hope to Sarita. She is no better than Kamla where Kamla is calling really bad names to Sarita and Dadi is calling Divya a dayan (witch). Again both of them have no issues with Raj. So Sarita either feels inadequate or gets false hopes about Raj and also blames Divya for things on which Divya has no control.

That's why I wrote yesterday that how is Sarita blaming Divya any different from Divya thinking harshly about Sarita. Also, as you pointed out that Divya may be impulsive in her actions or forming opinions, but she is more open minded than any other characters. So more than likely, she would be the first one to figure out that she made an impulsive judgment about Sarita.

As far as Dadi is concerned, I am not even sure how much her support for Sarita is for Sarita's sake based on what I have seen so far. Kamla doesn't give her respect and by extension her grand daughters who follow Kamla do not do so. Of course, she was not giving respect to Kamla either as she pointed out shortcomings (her background of being an uncultured Haryanavi) to strangers. She did not reprimand her son when he was threatening to slap her. In the last episode too, she kept quiet when the grand-daughter openly said about going to the father to kick Sarita out. She only teaches Sarita to stay quiet and that too only after the battle between Sarita and Kamla/daughters go out of hand. Sarita pays her gratitude by serving Dadi (giving her tea, massaging her legs and whatnot). Not there is anything wrong with Sarita serving Dadi, but Dadi seems to use Sarita for her own selfish reasons by either giving her false hopes or dry sympathy. At least that's the way Dadi's character is coming out to me based on what was shown pre and post leap.

So with a family like that, Raj is supposed to be a messed up character who really has no support. No wonder he is so emotionally detached for 10 years. Divya more than likely was the only stable emotional anchor for him and he got lost without her. So with Divya returning to his life (even if she finds someone else), that emotional balance would come back and he may be able to see the fault in his actions/choices clearly. There is nobody else to point anything out his faults to him or asking him to move on because they have made him a victim of either Sarita or Divya or both.

Finally, there is one interesting point that CVs may or may not be addressing. That is the society's perception of a girl taking care of her responsibilities versus a guy doing the same. If situations were reversed where Raj would have given up 10 years of his life to take care of his family and Divya had married somebody else. Would there be more sympathy for Raj that he had to sacrifice his love? Would she have been looked at unsympathetically that she did not wait for Raj or share his responsibilities. Would Raj had been blamed for Divya's unhappiness or unwillingness to move on with her life. Of course, this is considering that the back story has not been shown of Divya and Raj's and their view point is being kept a mystery. But if one of the objective is also to show different standards for a girl vs a guy in a society (on how they are judged for the same choices), then it would be a really progressive story.

In other words, I hope the story just doesn't make somebody sacrificial (either Sarita or Divya or both). I want to see how people make choices that may or may not be right, learn to find peace with their decisions and then making best of whatever is given to them and be happy about that.

Edited by why6 - 12 years ago

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Episode Discussion Thread- PV...EK Nayee Umeed - Page 9

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