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CHAPTER 31:
Sakshi walked up to his room. She knocked. "may I come in?"
She got a reply and walked in. he was relaxing. There was a bright look in his eyes. It said he is happy. Well who wouldn't?
Sa: kya baath hai Arjun? aaj bade khush lag rahe ho.
Ar: don't act Sakshi. I can guess, baba told you everything.
Sa: bas thode hints diye haiā¦ kuch zyada nahi.tho khush kabri tho do mujhe.
He smiled at her. "khush kabri? Not yet Sakshi. Its just in the makingā¦"
Sa: well I'll waitā¦ no problem.
Ar: yaha kaise? Lagtha hai aaj kal Rathod kaafi lenient hue hai apne staffs pe.
Sa: uthna bhi nahiā¦ khair permission mil hi gayaā¦ ab agar khush khabri milne hi wale hai tho, aage ke bare me kuch socha?
Arjun's smile dimmed. "aage kuch hoga.. ye mujhe nahi patha Sakshiā¦"
Sa: kyu nahi hoga Arjun. of course hogaā¦ tum hamesha ithna negative kyu soch rahe ho? not the Arjun Rawte that I have heard aboutā¦ itne jaldi haar mman liyaā¦
Ar: jaldi kaha Sakshi? Its more than 2 years now.
Sa: aur inme sirf kuch mahine me hi tum haar maan liya hai Arjun. uske pehle jo hua, usme tumhare koi galthi nahi. It was just the fate.
Ar: fateā¦ ab saara ilzam uspe dalna hi teekh haiā¦
Sakshi didn't know how to carry on with the talkā¦ she watched him being silent againā¦
Sa: is khamoshi hi mujhe kuch samajh me nahi athe Arjun. akhir kab thak isse leke chaloge? Why don't you open your mind. Boloā¦ kya janthi hu mien tumhare bare mien? Bas ithna hi na, ke tum ek bohot kabil officer ho, aur wo cases ke bare me, jo meine jaana hai. ek friend ke tharah, I don't know you. Na tum mere koi sawal ke jawab dethe ho, aur na puchne dethe ho.aur waha Aishaā¦ wo bhi kuch alag nahi haiā¦ kisi aur se patha laga ke uss din tumhare wedding anniversary theā¦ I know nothingā¦ aise kaise hosaktha haiā¦
He looked to her. Blank in expressionā¦
Sa: I need to support her Arjun, and I cant do it without you. Aisha kaun hai,kaise hai, ye mujhe bathaoā¦ shayad mien tumhare aur uske help kar pauā¦
He was silent still.
Sa:I know I'm irritating you. Par mere aisa koi irada nahi haiā¦ its just thatā¦
She looked frustratedā¦ still no answer. She was at the window, the air was soothing, but it was not enough to take her frustrationā¦
He looked away. She waitedā¦ after mintes that ages, she lost hope. "okā¦ agar tumā¦."
"kya jaanna chahthe ho tum?"
She stopped in betweenā¦. His eyes were not on herā¦ but question was to her.
He looked at her now. "what do you want to know?"
She felt a ray of hopeā¦ she smiled. "jo bhi tum kehna chahthe hoā¦ wo sabā¦ speak what's in your mindā¦"
He looked penseively. He turned away, he didn't know what to say. Where to begin. But he felt should speak. He thought for sometimeā¦ and then he beganā¦ as if rearranging the memoriesā¦
"Kehthe hai ke jab sare darwaza band hothe hai, thab koi na koi rasta hamare samne zaroor khultha hai. kya yahi hua tha mere zindagi me bhi? Kya isse hi destiny kehthe hai?
Patha nahiā¦
Ek adhuri zindagi leke zinda tha mien. Na kisi ko mere kareeb aane detha, aur na kisike paas jathe the. jisse apne paas rakhna tha, usse jaan bhujke bhaga diya. Kuch log khud bhaag gaya. Aur samay ne mujhe akele chod diya.
Aishaā¦ Nahi Nadiyaā¦ wo tho thoofan banke ayi thi. Kisike pehle mulakath aise bhi hosaktha hai, ye mujhe nahi patha tha. Aur uss pehli mulakath ke baad aise bhi hoga, ye bhi nahi patha tha. Pehle ek co workerā¦ wahi thak rukhi thi bathein. Mien bas ek Akdu Rawte reh gaya tha. Aur wo ziddi Aisha. (he smiled).
Gussa mere naak me thaā¦ lekin uske pucho math. Uske aas paas ke hawa me hi thi. Uske problem kya thi, ye mujhe kabhi nahi patha chala. Shayad patha lagana mera maksad hi nahi tha.
Case ke beech me wo ek alag hi avatar lethi thi. Lekin kabhi kabhi uske ankhon me kuch aur hi thiā¦ ek kashishā¦ ek hamdardiā¦ jo na office wali Aisha me thiā¦ aur na Nadiya meā¦
Lekin meine shayad bohot kuch miss kardiya tha. Arjun Rawte did miss many things.
Usse meri kahani patha thaā¦ usse patha tha ki,meine kya khoya haiā¦ wo sab jaanthi thiā¦ lekin wo naahi mujhe dikhayaā¦ aur naahi meine dekhaā¦
Mere har aadat ke bare me usse patha tha. Aur jo baath usse sabse zyada thang karthi thi, wo thi mere aur Sam ke beech ke faasle. Kayi baar wo hum dono ke beech fas jathi thi. Uski ankhen kayi sawal puchthi thi. Lekin meine hi usse nazar andaz kiyaā¦
( he was speaking as if in a tranceā¦ forgetting her presence. And she kept her silence tooā¦ it was high time that he had opened his heartā¦)
Wo dinā¦mujhe chot laga thaā¦. Kafi gehra tha.shayad uth nahi paya ā¦. Isliye, Sam ne Aisha ko waha bhej diyaā¦ wo pehli bar thiā¦ jab usne mujhse bath ki thiā¦ ETF Officer Aisha banke nahiā¦ balke sirf Aishaā¦
Meine bohot koshish kiya ke usse bhagaane keliyeā¦ lekin wo kaha maanne wali thiā¦ wahi rukhiā¦. Aur bathein karne lagiā¦ mien ansuna banne ke bohot koshish kiā¦. Lekin mere mann shayad aur sunna chahtha thaā¦ kaafi ajeeb laga uss dinā¦
Do-theen din wo aye mere dekhbhal karneā¦ aur mien usse chahkar bhi bhaga nahi paaya. Wapas office jaane lage tho sab kuch normal hi tha. Aur shayad mujhe aise hi lagaā¦
Kaam ke beech me hamare beech ek doori thi. Hum saath the,lekin firbhi kuch bathathe nahi thiā¦ shayad hamari Khamoshi hi sab kuch keh rahe theā¦
Fir ek din wo lapatha huaā¦ mere hi galthi thiā¦ do dinā¦ hum sab paaglon ke tharah dhoonda usseā¦ fir mili woā¦ uss ek pal mien mujhe kya hua tha, ye mujhe nahi pathaā¦ aise lag raha tha ke pure duniya se usse chupa luā¦ mere wajah se wo uss haal me thiā¦ mere wajah se firse koi thakleef me thiā¦ sirf mere wajah seā¦
Hospital ke corridor me wo palā¦. Aisa lag raha tha jaise mien firse wahi khada hu, jaha mien ek baar pehle bhi khada thaā¦ lekin uss din kuch aur hua, jo shayad pehle nahi hua.
Samā¦ uss din Rathod firse Sam ban gayaā¦ wo purane Samā¦ jo bohot samay se mere samne tha, lekin paas nahiā¦ usse kaise patha ke mujhe uske zaroorath tha? I never knew I was so vulnerableā¦ ke usne mere bath mere ankhon me dekh liyaā¦
He didn't say anythingā¦ bas mere paas thaā¦ aur wahi mere liya kaafi thaā¦
Fir Aisha ko hosh ayaā¦ tumhe patha nahi Sakshi, uss din mien bade dino baad saans liya thaā¦ uske baad sab kuch badal gayaā¦ sab kuchā¦
Kab baath aage bhadiā¦ ye hame nahi patha chalaā¦ ek ajeeb si raahath milne lageā¦ hamare rishte ko naam dene wala Sam hi thaā¦. Pyaarā¦ he said we were in loveā¦
Dostiā¦ kithna maina miss kiya tha, mein jaanne lagaā¦ kuch saal Sam se dur rahkar meine kithne bada galthi ki thiā¦ ye bhi mujhe patha lagaā¦ hamare beech sorry kehne keliye bohot kuch thaā¦. Lekin kuch bhi nahi kahaā¦ firse hamare khamoshi bolne lageā¦
Aisha aur mien hamare rishte ko aage badhane ke bare me sochne lagaā¦ par dar tha mujheā¦ kahi mien usse wo sare khushiyan na depau, jiske wo layak haiā¦ jo ek ladki ke khwab haiā¦ lekin firse meri Aisha surprised meā¦ usse bas meri khushiyon ke parwa thiā¦
Shaadi se pehle, sam ne mujhe ghar dhoondne ko kaha. Wo nahi chahthe the ke mien Aisha ko uss lodge me lejau, jaha sirf mere adhuri rathein thiā¦ ek gharā¦ wo tho ek sapna thaā¦ jo meine saakar bhi kiyaā¦ Aisha ke saath. Mien usse waha legayaā¦ par wo waha ussi din aana chahtha tha, jiss din wo sachme meri ban jaatheā¦
Aur legaya mien usse wahaā¦ meri Aisha banakeā¦.
Zindagi ke sare ruk badal gaye uss din seā¦ sab kuch firsse badal gayaā¦.
Kehthe hai kisi ko agar bohot sare khushiyan milthe hai, tho kisike nazar lag jaathe haiā¦ I used to laugh at itā¦ koi bhala nazar kaise laga sakthe haiā¦ aur mere hi zindagi ek din mujhe wo sikha diyaā¦ kisike nazar lag gaye mereā¦ nahi ā¦ hamare khushiyon koā¦.
Wo dinā¦ wo batheinā¦ wo ankheinā¦ yo yadeinā¦issi se tho zinda hu mienā¦
Shayad upar wala jo bhi hai, usne kuch soch rakha hogaā¦ warna uss din mien mar kyu nahi gaye? Kyu ek zinda laash banake firse chod diya? Kyu tumhe mere samne bheja?"
He turned to herā¦ Sakshi's eyes were fullā¦ she smiled at himā¦ with a twinkle in her eyesā¦
Silence prevailedā¦ firse Khamoshiyan bathein karne lageā¦
Sakshi wiped her tear and looked up to him. "destiny ke bare me suna hai Arjun? wahi jo tumhe Aisha se milwaya tha? Wahi jo hame milwaya? Sare sawal ke jawab wahi haiā¦ kash mien wo jawab de patheā¦ but I'm sorry, I don't have it with me"
He smiled and turned away. She was watching him.
Sa: I wish I could read your minds Arjun. tumhare ankhein bohot kuch keh rahi hai. kash mien wo pad patheā¦
Ar: acha hua nahi pad pathe hai. warnaā¦
Sa: par tumse ek bath puchu?
He turned to her.
Sa: kya tumhe nahi lag raha hai ke tum jo kar rahe ho, wo galath hai? kya usse sab kuch patha lagne ka haq nahi hai? jiss din usse patha chalegaā¦ kya tum uss din ke bare me socha hai?
He didn't have an answer.
Sa: socho Arjunā¦ do saal, se wo issi viswas ke sath jee rahi hai, ke tum kahi hai. agar samne nahi, tho kam se kam apne dil me tho haiā¦ sochoā¦ agar usse patha chalega, ke do saal ke uske har dard, har thakleef, uske akelapan, sab bewaja tha, tho kaise lagega usse? Tumhari Aisha firse tuut jayegi. Uss haal se nikalne keliye, usse aur bhi time lagegaā¦ jithna abhi laga hai, usse kayi zyadaā¦
He knew every word was true. He had thought about it for a long time. But the feel that he may never get well made him to go back to a shell that, he made himself believe that Aisha will never come to know about his existence. He himself had made the Arjun Rawte a coward, to face the world, or rather his loveā¦ but he was trying to keep her out of his painā¦ he knew whatever reason he gave, he was being selfish. Aisha did have the right to know the truth. But he was frightenedā¦ yes he wasā¦
But the latest change in himself, the small improvement in himā¦ had brought up a ray of hopeā¦ to meet her againā¦ butā¦ how? As Sakshi said, how will he face her? Many questions were going on his mindā¦
But he could swear on anyone alive, dead or Godlyā¦ he wished to see herā¦.
Sakshi could see emotions moving along in those eyesā¦ she moved away from the window pane, to his bed. He was oblivious to it. She took a seat by him on the bed and placed her hand on his. He looked up to her.
Sa: bolo Arjun.. is dard ko aur math chupaoā¦ pleaseā¦
He was silent againā¦
Sa: pleaseā¦ just for onceā¦pleaseā¦
He could feel a lump in his throatā¦ a shiver on his lipsā¦. A burning sensation in the corner of his eyesā¦ he opened his mouthā¦. But voice stuck somewhere deepā¦ he tried againā¦
"yes Sakshiā¦. I love herā¦ I really doā¦. And I am sorryā¦."
He closed his eyesā¦. For the first time she saw his tearsā¦ without any shieldā¦ anything that he tried to hide itā¦
She felt terrible too. She wanted him to open his mind but not become weakā¦ she wanted Aisha to be his strengthā¦ not his weaknessā¦ she didn't know what to doā¦ she did the only thing that she could doā¦
She held his hand tight by one hand, and the other one she placed his shoulder. Her touch was soothing, as if coming from a long lost friendā¦ yes irony againā¦she is his friendā¦ whom he had tried to shut awayā¦
They sat there for a whileā¦ she could feel him relaxingā¦ he opened his eyesā¦ she took her hands from his shoulder. "better?"
He nodded yes and turned away to wipe the tear dropā¦
She gave him some time to compose. He looked at her after a whileā¦
"thanks Sakshiā¦ I really mean itā¦"
She smiled. " I knowā¦ par shayadā¦ bohot jald tum mujhe kuch aur hi kehne wale hoā¦"
He looked confused. She smiled weakly now. "matlab?"
She knew this was going to be tough. She stood up and walked to the window againā¦ she was silent, preparing herself.
"bolo Sakshiā¦ I am not used to your silenceā¦"
She tried to smile, but his eyes demanded answer.
Sa: woā¦ woā¦
Ar: aage boloā¦
Sa: agar mien kahu ke jo tum nahi kar paya, wo koi aur kar rahe haiā¦ tho tumhe kaisa lagega?
Ar: matlab?
Sa: agarā¦ mien kahu keā¦. Tumhare pyaar tumhe dhoond rahi haiā¦ thoā¦
Arjun was in shock now. "what did you tell her? Sakshi I told you not to do itā¦"
Sa: I didn't Arjun. aur isliye, wo khud dhoondne nikle haiā¦ Aisha is searching for you Arjunā¦ wo apni pyaarā¦ apni pati ko dhoondne lagi haiā¦ aur shayad bohot jald wo tumhare samne hogi Arjunā¦
One side he was so happyā¦ he wished to scream out loud... Next sideā¦
She knew his tug of war in himselfā¦
Sa: don't worry Arjun. I'll keep my promise. Lekin mien usse nahi rok sakthiā¦ par ek promise aur kar sakthi hu, I'll be with herā¦ bas ithne kehne aya tha ke apne aapko thaiyar karo Arjunā¦ you will have to face her one dayā¦ kyunki uski zidd tho tum janthe hi hoā¦ she is on itā¦. and she will make itā¦. bas yahi baath karni ayi thiā¦
He closed his eyesā¦. For the first time she saw his tearsā¦ without any shieldā¦ anything that he tried to hide itā¦
hi kunchu diš¤...
awesome partššš... finaly finaly arjun opened up his mind and his heart...n thank god he did it...š...
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