Smita,😊
Here is my interpretation for part 77.
The weather in the Room of Revelations was unsettling. The same continued in the rest of the update. The cloud which indicates unsettled weather is called cirrocumulus. The sky with cirrocumulous clouds is called MACKEREL SKY. Why is it called Mackerel sky? Cirrocumulous clouds are a bunch of woolly clouds that resemble the scales of Mackerels. Then why do I term this update as Mackerel sky?
It is because the clouds are in small woolly bunches and are short-lived though they give no such indications! That is because you see them usually on a clear blue sky!!
Aarti after much contemplation said that she needed time to decide for her waiting audience.
Though NK agreed Nani said they would like to seek Kamala's permission for the marriage and Aarti could give her decision later and convey it.
"Haan. That's good, Nandkisore!", said Buaji.
Mami also nodded.
Arnav looked at Aarti, an eyebrow raised.
Khushi asked, "What do you want us to do, Aartiji?"
"Please don't talk to Amma now.", said Aarti softly.
All looked at her.
"Give me time. Three months. Amma needs the rest, the care that only I am left to provide her... Let her recover. When she is better, I will tell her. And I will let you know."
Arnav nodded, sure that Aarti would agree to marry NK after 3 months.
"You can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future" ~ Steve Jobs
But Mami was not so sure. "What if after three months timewaa, Aarti Bitiyaa decides that she does not want to get married to NK Babua?"
"Then I will start pestering Aarti to marry me again. Till she agrees.", NK smiled, confident.
Aarti had to hide a smile.
"You don't love someone because they're perfect, you love them in spite of the fact that they're not." ~ Jodi Picoult, My Sister's Keeper
"Haan, NK Bhai. We will help you build a cabin across Aartiji's gate. You can do bhook hartal there.", Akash teased him.
"Bhook hartal?", NK asked, his eyes wide. "Hartal I will do, but not bhook hartal. No hungry hartal. Only hartal with food and water. Sorry, Aarti." NK pulled his ear. All laughed.
"Kid, don't miss an opportunity to laugh, because laughter is what makes the boot heels of life palatable" ~ Bryan R. Dennis, Isle of Stumps
"Sabaash, NK Bitwaa. You are the shaan of our khaandaan, Hello Hi Bye Bye!", said Mami.
"Khaandaan? Does that have something to do with khaana? Like daan of khaana? Giving away food?", NK asked, genuinely perplexed.
"They say laughter is the best medicine, and I agree. Plus, it's free, has no bad side effects and is available to EVERYONE" ~ Mindy Levy
Mami & Buaji hit their heads with their hands at the same time.
Akash jumped up. "Bhai, we should leave."
Arnav nodded.
Akash whispered in his ear, "The more Aarti hears NK Bhai's Hindi, the more likely she is to run away, Bhai."
Arnav smiled.
"Laughter is a very underrated tool for healing"
~ Bronnie Ware, The Top Five Regrets of the Dying
Wishing Aarti a safe trip with Amma and Gopi Kaka, wishing Amma a speedy recovery, Arnav gave his visiting card with all his contact numbers to contact if anything was needed.
All the ladies, one by one, hugged Aarti. Buaji lifted her off the floor in her enthusiasm.
"A hug is a handshake from the heart"
As she stood gasping for breath after Buaji's assault, Aarti saw the Sunflower come closer to her, a naughty twinkle in his eyes. She wanted to take a step back, but to do so in front of all the watching ladies and men would be awkward. She stood her place, her breathing shallow.
NK reached her, and gently dropped a kiss on her cheek.
Aarti could hear Buaji & Mami gasp and Khushiji & Payalji giggle.
"Where are you going?", he asked.
"Err... Just a few places. Some old & new memories...", she left it open ended.
"Another secret!", sighed NK, a smile on his lips.
"We will wait outside for you, NK.", Arnav said, a smile hidden in his voice
Arnav led a shell-shocked Akash, open-mouthed Buaji & Mami, a smiling Nani, and happy Khushi & Payal out of the room.
NK nodded his thanks at his beloved Nannav.
"You are leaving me, Aarti. But don't forget me.", NK said, cupping her face in his hands.
Aarti lowered her eyes.
"Just something to remember me by." He bent and kissed her good and long till both of them had no idea where they were. They parted reluctantly, breathing heavily.
"How did it happen that their lips came together? How does it happen that birds sing, that snow melts, that the rose unfolds, that the dawn whitens behind the stark shapes of trees on the quivering summit of the hill? A kiss, and all was said" ~ Victor Hugo
"Will you forget me, Aarti?", NK asked, his voice a mere whisper.
"No.", breathed Aarti.
"Will you talk to me if I call you?"
"Yes.", she admitted.
Akash knocked on the door. "Err... NK Bhai, it is time to leave."
"One moment, Akash."
"Kissing is like drinking salted water. You drink, and your thirst increases" ~ Chinese Proverb
NK stole another quick kiss, and after rubbing his nose against hers, walked out of the room with Aarti.
They all wished Gopi Kaka a safe trip and Arnav gave his, Akash's and NK's cell numbers in case of need.
"If you love somebody, let them go, for if they return, they were always yours. If they don't, they never were" ~ Khalil Gibran
A few days later Aarti who wanted tell a lot to NK about,
Her fears, the foremost of them being the fear that she might never see him again. Her fear that her mother might not make it through the surgery...
took the writing pad all set to write a letter.
"The paradox of reality is that no image is as compelling as the one which exists only in the mind's eye" ~ Shana Alexander
She felt she just couldn't put her burden on his shoulders and dropped the pen on the pristine sheet. She knew once NK and his family, gets an inkling of her mother's health problem them would swoop down on them and lend all the possible help. But she who is not used to seeking help nor take help was reluctant to bring them into the picture. She was in a hospital room and was in doldrums.
"A lot of compelling stories in the world aren't being told, and the fact that people don't know about them compounds the suffering"
~ Anderson Cooper
The only good thing about the whole mess was that she had never told him how much he meant to her. Maybe he had understood it from her silence, her eyes, her response when he kissed her... But she had never said it.
"The world is not a pleasant place to be without someone to hold and be held by" ~ Nikki Giovanni
Making up her mind to tell him about her decision she wrote,
"My Sunflower,", she wrote.
She crossed it out, cursing herself.
Her purpose was to send him away, not tell him that she cared for him. She tore out that sheet of paper, crumpled it, and threw it into the dustbin. She started on a fresh sheet.
"NK."
Was that too abrupt?
She added, "My dear to NK." She crossed out "My"
"Dear NK". Yes, that would do. Formal, but not too formal.
"To send a letter is a good way to move somewhere without moving anything but your heart" ~ Phyllis Theroux
"Dear NK,
You asked me to marry you, many times. I refused many times.
Not because you are a bad person. But because I am not free to marry. Anyone.
"The right thing to do and the hard thing to do are usually the same."
~Steve Maraboli, Life, The Truth, and Being Free
I told your family to search else where for a bride for you. Not just because I would make a terrible wife with my ignorance of how a family functions, what a good marriage is etc, but mainly because I am not free to marry.
My first priority is my Amma. I should say, my only priority is my Amma.
"This I choose to do. If there is a price, this I choose to pay. If it is my death, then I choose to die. Where this takes me, there I choose to go. I choose. This I choose to do"
~ Terry Pratchett, Wintersmith (Tiffany Aching #3)
I put up with Mohan Mishra all my life for her. Day in and day out. Every day. He used to try and provoke me to react so that he could punish Amma more for my reactions, but I would stare at him with an expressionless face, not giving him a chance.
How he hated me!
"Hate is a bottomless cup; I will pour and pour"
~ Euripides, Medea
He tried it all. Tried to make me lose my temper. Tried to humiliate me. Tried to make me give up. Starved me. Gave me more work than I could do. But I hung on, letting his taunts and bitter words go by me. Only for my Amma.
I held strong after Shikha's death for her. Only for her. Otherwise my grief would have taken me where Shikha went.
"For every good reason there is to lie, there is a better reason to tell the truth" ~ Bo Bennett
After Mohan Mishra's death, I spent a good part of everyday trying to bring her out of her shell. I am not going to let a pesky disease kill her. She is just 43. Just 43 bloody years old. She will survive this. And she will live as she should have lived all these years, with dignity, with happiness, with independence, and with freedom.
NK, nothing else matters to me. Not my future. Not my life. I am sorry if I gave you hope that we could have a future together when I don't have a future.
"Letters always frustrate me with what's left out" ~ Eileen Drew, Blue Taxis: Stories about Africa
Gopi Kakka will give you this letter when it is time. Get on with your life. As Amma once said, you deserve to be happy."
PS.
"You once asked me why I called you a Sunflower.
"Keep your face always toward the sunshine - and shadows will fall behind you"
~ Walt Whitman
Not because you like yellow. But because something positive radiates from your face. Maybe it is your zest for living. Maybe it is the love you have for your family and they have for you. Your confidence in their support and your love. Maybe it is just your good heart.
Live. Be happy.
Yours
Aarti."
"Two words. Three vowels. Four consonants. Seven letters. It can either cut you open to the core and leave you in ungodly pain or it can free your soul and lift a tremendous weight off you shoulders. The phrase is: It's over" ~ Maggi Richard
She read the letter. Then she cut off "yours", swallowing hard.
"You deserve a longer letter than this; but it is my unhappy fate seldom to treat people so well as they deserve" ~ Jane Austen
Then she folded the letter carefully, put it in an envelope, and sealed it. She put it aside, and leaned back in the chair, looking at the white wall.
"Things we lose have a way of coming back to us in the end, if not always in the way we expect"
~ J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
There was so much she wanted to tell him. So much she wanted to say and so much he shouldn't hear.
"Love is being honest with yourself at all times
being honest with the other person at all times
telling, listening, respecting the truth
and never pretending.
Love is the source of reality" ~ Susan Polis Schutz
She pulled the notepad closer to her, and took up the pen again.
"My dear Sunflower", she started.
In the beginning we see, Aarti seeking time to give her decision. Though she is seeking a respite from conveying what she wants to, still that is not what she really wants. She is masking her real feelings behind the cloud of responsibility! We see NK agreeing to her request as he doesn't want to pressurize her! But that is not what he wants. He wants to be right beside her through thick and thin. So again his feelings are not reciprocated and he is under a cloud! But his personality is such that he always thinks positively. Always seeking the sunshine and striving to get it! Arnav Singh Raizada, is the one who has an inkling of what is Aarti going through as he had tread a path similar to it earlier in his life. He knew what her responsibilities are and where her priorities lay! So is Kushi! She too had walked along a similar path and understood Aarti's dilemma much clearer than Aarti herself! Maami is also under a cloud of apprehension that at the end of three months if her answer is no how will she be able to console her nephew!!
Even when she writes the letter to NK, Aarti is still under the cloud.
"If you say you can or you can't you are right either way" ~ Henry Ford
It is she who has to decide.
It is she who has to battle.
It is she who has to learn to seek help, get help and not just render help!
This is what Arnav Singh Raizada has realized and is sticking to it! He is clear about it. He is as clear as a blue sky! Kushi being his better half and soulmate knows that the decision solely rests on Aarti and she has faith in her to do the right thing in the end, though she might take her own sweet time!
"To make a change, you must be: willing to commit, willing to change, willing to have an open mind, and willing to take action!"
~ Tae Yun Kim, The Silent Master: Awakening The Power Within
The time will come, is what Kushi is clear about. But the question is when? That only Aarti can tell when things get clearer to her.
Aarti wants to clear the sky for her mother which has been clouded for the past twenty three years before she could think of herself!
MACKEREL SKY indeed!!!!!!
"The dawn is not distant, nor is the night starless; love is eternal" ~ Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
That's it from me. Hope you enjoy it.
Edited by rulama - 12 years ago
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