Absence makes the heart grow fonder? Really? - Page 3

Originally posted by: elle45

Thank you Abida for replying 😊 I really really hope you two get back together again, with an even stronger bond than before, InshAllah. Whatever the issue, the misunderstanding, I hope it is all cleared out very soon. 😊

yes we r back together agiannn,s huker he allah ka:D again better than before, it happens in a relationshipp...if 1 is angry, the other shuld know that he/she ddidnt mean it n moreover he/she luvs u truly, so if things happen, u shouldnt forget the love u got by the person...but coz of a misundertsnading sumtimes (mostly boys) say bad stuff in anger n a girl knows the nature of her boyfriend/husband, so she just should try to make him understand that they shouldnt behave like this, dont deny when he is doing it, but tell him later on with love, he will understand for sure

One thing though... You said that Krishna says lots of stuff in anger that he doesn't mean, and he regrets it later on... but do you think everything can be forgiven like this?

If a man/woman abuse their partner and later say... forgive me, I did it in anger... then should you forgive such a person? 😕

now going to krishna's matter, yes he said manyyy bad things to pratigya, noot 1 time but many times, why pratigya went back to him??? coz she knew that krishna didnt mean it n its his nature tht he says nonsense in anger! n this time the drift between them is tooo big, so i dont know how they will get back together, its just that krishna will regret, but not to forget pratigya is very hurt...but she knows that he really lvs her but coz of a misundertsnaidng hes behaving like this...thats why shes stilll waiting for him...its not that pratigya should forgive him each time, but jitna wo pyaar karta he, wo to is gusse ke aag ekuch nei na??!! i know sumtimes people give more value to the anger/negative things...when 1 negative thing happens, people forget the postiive ones...

but we shouldh just luk that whyyy a person is behaving lik ethis, in this case, why is krishan behaving like this/????/ he has a reason forit...every time he had a reason, even though it was wrong, but he had a reason n pratigya knows that n even this tiime she will forgive him, coz at the end they belong together n if she wont forgive him then how will their relaitonship surrvive...i know krishna should also not behave like this everytime, but he never behaves like this to her without a reasonnn!! so dun worry, the thing ur saying is right...when ur partner abuses u, u get VERYYY hurt, but at the end u know that the preson loves u n still u want to be with him/her...so forgive him/her n try to make him understand that he/she did wrong n next time he/she wont repeat the mistake again, so thats why they say: after a seperation, when ur back together again, its much more stronger!!! coz then the person wont repeat that mistake again, so u hav all the reasons to be stronger n closer to each other again... n pir agar koi galti hooo!!! again take this as example..i know its not a joke, but mistakes r always next to a HUMAN! u cant get rid of that...n in a relationship...many things happen, but if 1 person uses his.her brains...he/she can control the other any time...

at the end we want to be with our loved ones right? n if they r suffering from a negative habit, ITS U, the loved one, who will help the partner to change...so have faith...breaking takes jsut few minutes, but building a relationship takes ages, so u should show sum effort for it, if something happens

Originally posted by: elle45

Hey, so this is a question for those who are experienced in this, those who are committed or married or had their hearts broken... and I really would like to know the answer.

Nice topic - chalo bachon ko achi advise de diye.

Does Absence really make the heart grow fonder? Modify this to: Does having arguments/separations/trust issues in a relationship REALLY make you grow closer at the end of it, or once there is a crack, does it just keep widening into a chasm?

Trust is important. Knowing that your partner is just yours... is a the most important thing. Foe example, I go on and on abt Akshay (I'm a total fanatic!). But at the end of the day, My hubby has that trust in me - that I love him..(hubby).

About arguments.. once in a while arguments can be worthwhile - because you get a peek of your partners current emotions and struggles. They might have stuff going on and you are possibly not aware of it.. hence sometimes misunderstandings can happen, even an argument. BUT the important thing to do is sit down and talk about it, tell them how you feel and how they feel, try and listen and adapt a change. Men are more reluctant to talk - BUT that is the point you do a PBJ moment and make them listen and hear. I always think before the sun sets.. resolve your issues in the same day and do not drag it on to the next.

Daily arguments are petty and can turn a pretty relationship into an ugly one.

So I would say @ the blue - that will make you stronger

and @ the pink that will drive you apart.

Also pride and stubborness is another cause of marriage failure...Right now Krishna is hitting that way and making matters worse.

SEPARATIONS - Separations can break you - Hence Pratigya is facing the repercussions of her actions and so is BABA for telling her to go. Separations are not to be done in light situations.. for arguments, misunderstandings. Because one a man/woman starts getting used to walking out of the house in an argument then this becomes a habit - Hence oneday both will become immune to being without each other. Hence I am against separation. I believe in that, if your Partner loves you truely then he will wrap you in a safety blanket where you are reassaured of his love and protection and support. (Krishna falls here)

ACEPTABLE SEPARATION - If your partner cheats on you or beats you. At this point why even have separation I 'd say go for divorce! Unless it then depends on the individual on how depenent you are and what you expect in life for yourself. If you stay there will always be a part of you that will live in doubt with a happy coin in your purse missing.

To go back after the separation.. Time is a big healer and as the anger calms down, some people feel that they were happier with their partner rather than without them. (Pratigya falls here)

Linking this to Kriya... We've been getting multiple posts everyday to appease us which say that, rest assured, Kriya will be stronger at the end of all this. They will be closer to each other, more trusting, and next time, no one will be able to break them apart.

This means.. That despite their hardship - if they find their way to each other they are unbreakable.

But arguing and not trusting each other every other week and long term separations do not mean that they become stronger. But knowing that you have been able to survive the worst - then yes.

Now while I know all this will probably happen with Kriya, what I would like to know is Does such a thing happen in real life? Are ppl really able to forget the past and move on with a stronger relationship? Or do such continual trust issues just weaken the bond? I know you guys understand what I am trying to ask, even if I may be unable to phrase it clearly.

Answer to that is in the orange writting above.

I ask this before, whenever I have observed ppl, such sort of issues which lead to one person leaving the home, temporary separations etc, the issue still somewhat seems to be there. Even if they reconcile, it doesnt seem as if they are deeper in love? And a few times, the relationship does end for good.

I always feel - that mini arguments etc are not a substance to break your marriage over. No one said marriage is easy peasy, sometimes two people have to really give alot if they are committed. Do not just walk out of the house as this builds immense anger. Also if you on one hand wrap your partner in a safety blanket - do not take that away for them as some people base their lives around this.. you would end up destroying them.

This is the grave mistake Kriya have just made. Coz in the end your pain will be greater than the pain that you have caused your loved one.

Therefore, all the girls/ladies/forum members, please tell me what you think... And have you yourself experienced a relationship which went completely sour but sprang back with double the force?

@ Carisma:

Thank you for replying 🤗 I never knew when I made the thread that I'll get so many different perspectives about this. Everyone has one thing in common though, that you should give a chance to your partner once a mistake is made. Relationships cannot just be broken after every little argument.

I like how you don't support separation at all, and would rather solve the matter together. Even I don't much understand the concept that rifts can bring two ppl closer together, but many members on this thread say it does, from personal experience. Maybe it is all dependant on how willing the two ppl are to solve their issues?

@ Abida:

First, I'm really happy that things have been sorted out btw you two 😊

I guess you're right. Krishna can be forgiven as he has been completely fooled by his mother. He has a major misunderstanding. But he shouldn't repeat this mistake again... If he does ever doubt her intentions again, then I don't think that Prats will be wrong in leaving him.