-*- Jokes AddA -*-

ok i will post something. these jokes r from some website, not mine.


I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that, who cares? ...He's a mile away and you've got his shoes.

man explained inflation to his wife thus:
'When we married, you measured 36-24-36. Now you're 42-42-42.
There's more of you, but you are not worth as much.'

The amount of sleep required by the average person is about five minutes more.

i found this one too funny😆

Chemical Analyst About Women

Element: Woman

Symbol: WO
Discoverer: Adam
Atomic Weight: Accepted as 118 but is known to vary from 100 - 160 lbs.
Occurence: Surplus quantities in all urban areas.

Physical Properties:

1) Surface usually covered in a painted film.
2) Boils at nothing, freezes without reason.
3) Melts if given proper treatment.
4) Bitter if used incorrectly.
5) Found in various states.

Chemical Properties:

1) Possesses great affinity for gold, silver, platinum and other precious metals.
2) Able to absorb great quantities of expensive substances.
3) Insoluble in liquids but activity greatly increased by saturation in alcohol.

Uses:

1) Highly ornamental especially in sports cars.
2) Most poweful money-reducing agent known to man.

Tests:

1) Pure specimen turns a rosy tint if discovered in natural state.
2) Turns green if placed beside a better specimen.

Caution:

1) Highly dangerous except in experienced hands.
2) Illegal to possess more than one except in certain areas

Sid this will make Akash's day...👏

nice chemical sheet on women 😆

his jokes make our day too😆

yes they do, but he is going to like the chemical sheet even more cos he understands women😆

Akash, u hav jokes on women nd i will hav on men 😈

Great Advice to Pass on to Your Daughters

1. Don't imagine you can change a man - unless he's in diapers.

2. What do you do if your boyfriend walks-out? You shut the door.

3. If they put a man on the moon - they should be able to put them all up there.

4. Never let your man's mind wander - it's too little to be out alone.

5. Go for younger men. You might as well - they never mature anyway.

6. Men are all the same - they just have different faces, so that you can tell them apart.

7. Definition of a bachelor; a man who has missed the opportunity to make some woman miserable.

8. Women don't make fools of men - most of them are the do-it-yourself types.

9. Best way to get a man to do something, is to suggest they are too old for it.

10. Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.

11. If you want a committed man, look in a mental hospital.

12. The children of Israel wandered around the desert for 40 years. Even in biblical times, men wouldn't ask for directions.

13. If he asks what sort of books you're interested in, tell him checkbooks.

14. Remember a sense of humor does not mean that you tell him jokes, it means that you laugh at his.

15. Sadly, all men are created equal...

Men Are Like...

... Blenders.
You need one, but you're not quite sure why.

... Chocolate Bars.
Sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips.

... Coffee.
The best ones are rich, warm, and can keep you up all night long.

... Commercials.
You can't believe a word they say.

... Computers.
Hard to figure out and never have enough memory.

... Coolers.
Load them with beer and you can take them anywhere.

... Copiers.
You need them for reproduction, but that's about it.

... Curling Irons.
They're always hot, and they're always in your hair.

... Government Bonds.
They take way too long to mature.

... Horoscopes.
They always tell you what to do and are usually wrong.

... Lava Lamps.
Fun to look at, but not all that bright.

... Mascara.
They usually run at the first sign of emotion.

... Parking Spots.
The good ones are already taken and the ones that are left are either handicapped or extremely small.

... Popcorn.
They satisfy you, but only for a little while.

... Weather.
Nothing can be done to change either one of them.