Let's talk SERIOUS NOW!

Okay I was in rampant with my mind because it either had to choose one of it.

WHY SUNDAR WITH ARPITA IS FINE?/WHY SUNDAR WITH ARPITA NOT FINE?

and it's relation to the ARYLIE equation. I talked with my mother, read all the posts here and yes saw people avoiding this thing in other places like yt.

It was all praise for cute interactions of Arpi Sundar but when Imlie shed light in it most of us somehow turned sour.

So let's bullet point it out!

• First, we never saw Arpi and Sundar as characters. We were more invested in the relationship of the actors who were real life husband wife. But when they suddenly wanted to feed us this as they love each other we couldn't relate. For most of the time it was one sided for us. Today they did a huge mistake when Arpita was talking about Sundar the clip they showed Arpita remember was actually shown in the past as a clip of Sundar's imagination. But here they wanted to portray as a memory.

• It might sound a little bit offensive but we indeed stay in a Patriarchal society ( this point was given by my mom) now patriarchal not in the sense vice versa but its mainly about functioning of a society. In legal documents what are we, the first identity comes as DAUGHTER OF, second comes as WIFE OF, and at last you come to MOTHER OF. We never had an independent identity. It's not like I am here to complain but I am simply putting it in lines. I remember when I got the electricity line in my house in my name before the name was an option of Shri not Shrimati. The man who handed me the form asked me twice you want it your name and when my father said yes he cut the Shri manually and wrote a Shrimati in it. Basically HUSBAND OF? doesn't hold that much importance in front of WIFE OF?

• Now the 3rd point is interesting, it's about lifestyle. Imagine Arpita and Sundar married, what do you want Arpita's lifestyle should be like? Since our girls leave the home she might leave with Sundar. Then? A girl brought up in luxury never learnt how to cook, married her best friend of college and a love marriage. She leaves with Sundar and have to live his lifestyle where he might be afford necessity but not luxury. Also if you turn the cases around, wouldn't it hurt Sundar's self respect to live with his in laws because he is not a greedy person?

• Now this point involves people, ISOLATION I do have a practical example of my own family. My father is the first engineer of our khaandaan which made him get a real good job and then his relatives started to alienate him. Those people with whom he literally grew up because his lifestyle was different. The second blow came with my mom, yep she is from a different state with totally different perspectives and lifestyles. They alienated so us that still living in the same city only few kilometers away they don't even come to our house once a year. I noticed Arpita and Sundar will fall in kind of same position maybe worse. Aryan would not want his sister to live without luxury but what impact will it make in Sundar's life?

• Now Imlie's life will only upgrade for the Husband factor why? Just because husband is the provider? Nope she can earn too but will it be necessary? She can keep that money for herself and her family and yet luxury will be there. But when it will be Arpita Sundar what will be the case? Arpita is not independent so indirectly she might end up being in her brother's shoulders and Sundar... he is a butler but even if he wants to be a Chef how could we forget you need a Degree to be a chef!

• One of my cousin sis married the man who courted her during her college time. All were against this match( even I was though I am 9 years younger than her) the reason was the guy's finance. He was doing a job which costed him only 40k to 50k and my sis was brought up such way that she used to spend 60k in her makeup( she has good makeup skills and invested in luxury makeup) It was all love, all said yes to her love. Than the thing happened, she had a kid and in covid time she couldn't give rent of her house and the landlord kept all her furnitures. They were basically homeless with her kid and my cousin bro kept her in his place. Even he has a daughter but he has job in TCS which made him give his daughter dresses worth 2k easily and my sis couldn't afford a 500 rupees dress. This didn't hurt the siblings(my bro & sis) relationship but one thing noticed in bro's daughter's birthday that my sis daughter feels a competition with her. She took some Birthday gifts claiming hers which made my bhaabi angry. And the constant fight of these sisters because though they live under the same roof their lifestyles don't match.

I might sound like a bad person but when you think rationally( you can definitely blame my education and lifestyle coz it really shaped up my mind) I look for compatibility. Love might be blind in fiction but in reality sometimes the differences are so high that we need to end up sacrificing. Also it's important to be calculating sometimes because a wrong decision not just ruins your life it can ruin the next generation too like the two kids.

Too heavy but this is indeed a post from my heart why everything is becoming not at all digestible at some point.

I am extremely Sorry if this post hurt someone.

You're hitting all the right notes with this one which is exactly why so many of us want to see them developed as individual characters rather than just jump the gun with their relationship.

Additionally, even if we ignore all of the above, this isn't Arpita's first love with all the giddiness and the silliness that makes you forget reality and see the world with rose-tinted glasses. She's seen love before, a solid, sturdy, dependable kind. So what makes her okay with Sundar who is nothing that Arvind was and nor has much to offer from his own personality?

Thank you, thank you. The one thing I have learned personally is when two people from different backgrounds come together other than mutual respect and open communication the only other thing that would keep them together is similar ambitions or goals.

Arpita may not have had much ambition, but we don't know that. The story the writers have told us is that Arvind is a college friend of Arpi's so that means she was in a professional course and that is my assumption because Arvind was diligently handling Aryan's family business.

So at one point in time Arpita would have had some ambition, to own or run a business or something which may or may not have taken a backseat after marriage etc.

Sundar does not bring anything to the table in terms of ambition, respect and communication can only get a relationship so far and trust me if the ambitions do not match, lifestyle and expectations from a lifestyle do not match and the marriage is pretty much doomed right there.

So if the makers are hell bent on making this khichdi, it will be a bitter pill to swallow for everyone.

It is a bitter pill even more when it comes from Imlie who doesn’t know anything and acts like know it all. Slowly they are are making Imlie character clown and I am feeling bad for Sumbul.

Exactly there is much more than love to a marriage

There is whole bunch of people who need to understand this

Only 2 reasons to go with this pair.

1. They are a real couple so comfort/chemistry is natural. Plus they've a fandom from previous show, to appease them

2. As a subplot to develop arylie, inke marriage me bhi inko zyada importance nahi denge, leads se obsessed hai makers.

Originally posted by: MiuniS

Okay I was in rampant with my mind because it either had to choose one of it.

WHY SUNDAR WITH ARPITA IS FINE?/WHY SUNDAR WITH ARPITA NOT FINE?

and it's relation to the ARYLIE equation. I talked with my mother, read all the posts here and yes saw people avoiding this thing in other places like yt.

It was all praise for cute interactions of Arpi Sundar but when Imlie shed light in it most of us somehow turned sour.

So let's bullet point it out!

• First, we never saw Arpi and Sundar as characters. We were more invested in the relationship of the actors who were real life husband wife. But when they suddenly wanted to feed us this as they love each other we couldn't relate. For most of the time it was one sided for us. Today they did a huge mistake when Arpita was talking about Sundar the clip they showed Arpita remember was actually shown in the past as a clip of Sundar's imagination. But here they wanted to portray as a memory.

• It might sound a little bit offensive but we indeed stay in a Patriarchal society ( this point was given by my mom) now patriarchal not in the sense vice versa but its mainly about functioning of a society. In legal documents what are we, the first identity comes as DAUGHTER OF, second comes as WIFE OF, and at last you come to MOTHER OF. We never had an independent identity. It's not like I am here to complain but I am simply putting it in lines. I remember when I got the electricity line in my house in my name before the name was an option of Shri not Shrimati. The man who handed me the form asked me twice you want it your name and when my father said yes he cut the Shri manually and wrote a Shrimati in it. Basically HUSBAND OF? doesn't hold that much importance in front of WIFE OF?

• Now the 3rd point is interesting, it's about lifestyle. Imagine Arpita and Sundar married, what do you want Arpita's lifestyle should be like? Since our girls leave the home she might leave with Sundar. Then? A girl brought up in luxury never learnt how to cook, married her best friend of college and a love marriage. She leaves with Sundar and have to live his lifestyle where he might be afford necessity but not luxury. Also if you turn the cases around, wouldn't it hurt Sundar's self respect to live with his in laws because he is not a greedy person?

• Now this point involves people, ISOLATION I do have a practical example of my own family. My father is the first engineer of our khaandaan which made him get a real good job and then his relatives started to alienate him. Those people with whom he literally grew up because his lifestyle was different. The second blow came with my mom, yep she is from a different state with totally different perspectives and lifestyles. They alienated so us that still living in the same city only few kilometers away they don't even come to our house once a year. I noticed Arpita and Sundar will fall in kind of same position maybe worse. Aryan would not want his sister to live without luxury but what impact will it make in Sundar's life?

• Now Imlie's life will only upgrade for the Husband factor why? Just because husband is the provider? Nope she can earn too but will it be necessary? She can keep that money for herself and her family and yet luxury will be there. But when it will be Arpita Sundar what will be the case? Arpita is not independent so indirectly she might end up being in her brother's shoulders and Sundar... he is a butler but even if he wants to be a Chef how could we forget you need a Degree to be a chef!

• One of my cousin sis married the man who courted her during her college time. All were against this match( even I was though I am 9 years younger than her) the reason was the guy's finance. He was doing a job which costed him only 40k to 50k and my sis was brought up such way that she used to spend 60k in her makeup( she has good makeup skills and invested in luxury makeup) It was all love, all said yes to her love. Than the thing happened, she had a kid and in covid time she couldn't give rent of her house and the landlord kept all her furnitures. They were basically homeless with her kid and my cousin bro kept her in his place. Even he has a daughter but he has job in TCS which made him give his daughter dresses worth 2k easily and my sis couldn't afford a 500 rupees dress. This didn't hurt the siblings(my bro & sis) relationship but one thing noticed in bro's daughter's birthday that my sis daughter feels a competition with her. She took some Birthday gifts claiming hers which made my bhaabi angry. And the constant fight of these sisters because though they live under the same roof their lifestyles don't match.

I might sound like a bad person but when you think rationally( you can definitely blame my education and lifestyle coz it really shaped up my mind) I look for compatibility. Love might be blind in fiction but in reality sometimes the differences are so high that we need to end up sacrificing. Also it's important to be calculating sometimes because a wrong decision not just ruins your life it can ruin the next generation too like the two kids.

Too heavy but this is indeed a post from my heart why everything is becoming not at all digestible at some point.

I am extremely Sorry if this post hurt someone.

do you live in India?

Girls - it’s good to think about what your husband earns but no matter what he brings home, remember we are just as independent now. Build a career for yourselves so if one day your husbands earnings don’t match your lifestyle (you never know when he could be made redundant) YOU can earn enough to match the lifestyle you want. 🙌🏼

I really like your post. And let me tell you something i already faced this situation. I did love to someone but he was from different religion. My parents dint give me permission. It hurted me a lot. I dint talked with my dad almost a year. N then they were finding a good guy for me whoever he is. They dint care even though they found for me a divorce guy too. But things dint work out and then i decided to say yes whoever is come to see me. N i did say yes without looking is face and i told my uncle i want to get marry with only this guy. I dont care what is he doing and how much is he making per month or etc etc.n then i got married with that guy that time we dint have that luxuries life. But me n my husband were working hard and living a life like luxuries way. It's been 14years now. I have mmy own business, big house and 2 kids. N i love my husband a lot means a lotttt.

In same way my cousin sister she is living her life like hell. Me n she we born on a same day. She is 2.5 hours younger than me. She is my dad's sister's daughter. She loved her friend's brother. When her family got to know about it they were agree because he is from same religion. She got pregnant with her lover cum would be husband when she was 18. And no-one knew about it. They ran away n got married. Our all family members were cut the relationship with her. N she was living her life with...... after that her 2nd son born all family members forgave her. Now a days she is living with her 2kids n husband in 1bedroom cum livingroom house . Her sons are 22 n 20.

Whenever i am thinking and comparing myself to her. I feel myself i am very happiest person right now. I have everything right now. You remind me my last 15years life in one post. I was reading your post but my mind rewinding my past life. 🙂

Originally posted by: -Sarcy-

You're hitting all the right notes with this one which is exactly why so many of us want to see them developed as individual characters rather than just jump the gun with their relationship.

Additionally, even if we ignore all of the above, this isn't Arpita's first love with all the giddiness and the silliness that makes you forget reality and see the world with rose-tinted glasses. She's seen love before, a solid, sturdy, dependable kind. So what makes her okay with Sundar who is nothing that Arvind was and nor has much to offer from his own personality?

@bold: THIS

My problem is this whole half-baked, half assed presumption that just because Sundar has a crush on Arpita = Arpita also has one on Sundar = Crush equals love = Must Marry.

W.T.F?