Member Topic: What are your thoughts on witnessing domestic violence?

BlackWitch thumbnail
Posted: 3 years ago
#1

Last evening, I was walking my dog around the neighbourhood. It was the usual peaceful time, where shopkeepers are winding down and the lanes are becoming less busy. Suddenly, I heard a crash and saw my neighbour bang his door on the way in. Thinking it was a mistake, I walked ahead casually.

Sometime later, while returning home, I saw him going wild through the glass doors. He was banging a huge rod/stick around the living room, and terrorising his wife on the sofa, who I could barely see from outside. There was a lot of muffled shouting, and I saw him hitting her.

His maid came out from the other end of the house, and told me that he was drunk and did this often. She looked pretty scared and scuttled away.

At this point, I was just loitering outside like a stalker, wondering if I should call the cops, take a video or just walk away. Sometime later, I see him shirtless, still going with the wild gestures and shouting. I took my phone out to take a video, but this time he didn't hit his wife. I waited for some time, and then left.

But it's all I can think about now. I want to do something, but I am apprehensive to get too involved, because there are goons posing as government officers in my neighbourhood. Last time my husband asked a simple question regarding them cutting trees, they surrounded him, verbally abused him and were threatening physical violence. All this, just for asking whether they had the permission to cut these trees down.

On my own, I don't give a damn and can give the verbal lashing of a lifetime to people like this. But I am protective when my family is threatened, and I just don't know if I should take active steps.

I checked online, and I don't see a way to address this issue. Are there any suggestions and experiences you guys can share?

Edited by BlackWitch - 3 years ago

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Maroonporsche thumbnail
Posted: 3 years ago
#2

Do what you feel comfortable doing. If anything maybe make a anonymous police complaint

BlackWitch thumbnail
Posted: 3 years ago
#3

Is that even possible? I didn’t know we could make anonymous complaints

Originally posted by: Maroonporsche

Do what you feel comfortable doing. If anything maybe make a anonymous police complaint

TrollikaDevi thumbnail
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Posted: 3 years ago
#4

What do you mean by goons posing as officers? We're those the trees from your yard or the ones in the street ? Sounds like a bad situation. Is this one of those neighbourhoods?

You can make an anonymous police complaint regarding both. As for the couple, the wife will have to give a statement ; otherwise nothing will be done unless there's a really bad situation . I have witnessed DV many times. Quite often when you intervene the woman let's you down and asks you not to butt into their personal business. Its understandable because the guy would take it out on her later unless she's ready to leave him and live on her own. People run out of sympathy when the woman refuses to tell the cops about what's going on. And ofcourse there are those neighbours who gaslight her and blame her for what's going on. And the police can be very hostile if you're in the wrong locality . They side with the guy, accept bribes and let him off and even tell the victims to suck it up.


Here's something you can do. You could go over when the man isn't around. Pretending you need to borrow something. Or that you need to know something . Broach the topic and let her know she can talk to you and that you 'll help her if she needs it. If she doesn't respond to the offer unfortunately you're gonna have to let it be. You could leave her your number and the numbers of helplines for victims of DV. Not that it wouldn't have occured to her before but being reminded by a third person makes a difference. If you live within earshot you can keep an eye on what's going on and call the police if you feel things are escalating. It won't be a good idea for you or your husband to confront the man without talking to the woman first because it's possible he d go back home and abuse her more for 'ratting him out '.


Dont he conspicuous when you record anything involving that couple unless it's a life threatening situation for someone. Because if he's crazy you wouldn't want to make him feel defensive.

hbkrocks thumbnail
Posted: 3 years ago
#5

Sad part is they will still support their men even if you call the police.

Kyahikahoon thumbnail
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Posted: 3 years ago
#6

Best thing u can do is somehow contact the wife and talk to her when no one is around

423728 thumbnail
Posted: 3 years ago
#7

Personally I would make a police complaint regardless of the situation. You can make an anonymous complaint as well if you’re concerned about your families safety. Whether the victim welcomes the help or not, it would ease my conscience and give me some kind of peace knowing that one way or another, I tried to help and didn’t allow myself to become a bystander.


Hope this helps. ❤️

GetLegalIndia thumbnail
Posted: 3 years ago
#8

Women get abused in many forms, and these acts of continuous abuse have a severe mental effect on women, children and other family members. There is a profound history of domestic violence on women and a continuous rise in domestic violence cases that led to the Protection of Women from Domestic Violence Act. Read more about Domestic violence on getlegalindia.com

YourCat thumbnail
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Posted: 3 years ago
#9

Stay away from others internal matter is what I have learned in this forum

Edited by Lalakhun1 - 3 years ago

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